Disclaimer: I don't own The 100

A/N: Hey guys!
So like everyone, 3x07 destroyed me. So this fic is basically a giant middle finger to Jason.
This first chapter literally has the only angst of the entire story. Slight warning for some minor minor violence, and for a jerk mom.
I SWEAR THIS IS GOING TO BE NOTHING BUT LOVE AND HAPPINESS. BECAUSE DANG IT THAT'S WHAT WE DESERVE.
I'm going to try to update as quickly as possible, but college is kinda a thing. And super sorry for any typos. It happens.
It's gunna be fun, guys!
Enjoy X


Costia [9:07]: hey

Lexa [9:08]: Hello.

Costia [9:10]: are u busy rn?

Lexa [9:10]: No. Mother's out and father is working. I'm at home.

Costia [9:10]: ok

Costia [9:11]: can we meet up?

Costia [9:11]: at mill?

Lexa [9:16]: Sure. I can be there in about 15 minutes.

Costia [9:17]: c u then

With a sigh, Lexa locks her phone again and leans her forehead against the steering wheel. She turns to look at the front of the coffee shop that quickly became hers and Costia's. With one more sigh, Lexa turns off the car, unbuckles, and starts the slow walk over to the coffee shop.

The bell above the door chimes and familiar sights, sounds, and smells greet Lexa.

She ignores it all.

In the back of the shop sits Costia in their usual booth. Her head is down and her brown curls block most of her face.

She doesn't have a coffee in front of her.

Lexa steels herself and starts the walk back.

Just like a band-aid…

Eventually, Costia looks up at Lexa with a small smile – her brown eyes, dull. Lexa sits softly next to her.

It's quiet. Not the quiet that usually follows them. Not the quiet that is comfortable and safe.

This quiet is heavy.

Costia plays with the rings on her right hand.

Lexa stares at the water stain on the table.

After a moment, Costia sighs.

"Lexa…"

Lexa swallows.

"I know," she mumbles in return.

Costia reaches over and intertwines her soft hand with Lexa's.

(She is always soft.)

Lexa stares at the contrasting skin tones, unable to bring herself to look at Costia's face. If she looks at her eyes, she knows she'll start crying.

And she hates crying in public.

But Costia's thumb starts stroking her hand and "Lexa, please look at me," is whispered, and suddenly she can't look away. Brown eyes are swirling with emotion, and Lexa feels her own eyes starting to sting.

She squeezes Costia's hand.

"We had a good run though, didn't we?"

Lexa blinks rapidly, trying in vain to keep the tears back. Costia gently wipes a tear away and Lexa breathes out a quiet laugh.

"Yes… Yes, we did."

And Costia smiles at her, and there's the smell of coffee embedded into the building and the sounds of people talking and going about their days, but all Lexa sees is Costia's smile which has kissed hundreds of times.

Lexa watches a tear fall from Costia's eye before quietly letting go of her hand. Leaning over, Lexa brushes her lips against the tear and soft skin, before pressing her lips to Costia's.

The kiss tastes bittersweet.

Costia pulls away with a quiet gasp, her eyes closed. Lexa brushes hair away from the other girl's face before silently slipping out from the booth. Costia opens her eyes as Lexa stands in front of her.

"Goodbye, Costia."

"Goodbye, Lexa."

And with one more sad smile, and one more slow nod, Lexa turns and walks out of the coffee shop.

She manages to make it to her car before she lets the first sob go.


The ornate front door clicks shut softly behind Lexa as the girl takes a shuddering breath. The broken exhale is the only thing to shatter the silence of the house. Lexa makes her way through the grand foyer to the kitchen, only to stop short in the archway.

Her Mother's eyes are like ice as she stares down her daughter, dark liquid swirling around in the glass held in her polished hand.

"Alexandria."

Lexa swallows and prays her Mother can't see her red eyes.

"Hello, Mother. I did not expect you home so soon today."

"Nor did I."

The silence is suffocating and it takes everything Lexa has to control her fidget.

"Did something arise?"

Her Mother releases a chuckle that is like nails on a chalkboard; it's sharp and short and has Lexa filled with terror.

"Yes, Alexandria, something did indeed arise." Her Mother takes a generous sip from her glass before turning her attention back to her daughter. "I was enjoying my beautiful morning earlier, simply basking in my luck of having such a wonderful life and family. When suddenly I received a call, from Colleen. You do remember Colleen, don't you, Alexandria? Her son is Elijah, that lovely boy who is going to be taking over their family business."

"Yes, I remember her, Mother," is all Lexa can manage because she has no idea where this conversation is going – but terror has frozen her bones together, rendering her incapable of escape. Or of doing anything other than stand there as her Mother gives her a smile saturated with contempt.

"Well Colleen called me, in the middle of my beautiful morning filled with beautiful things, and you simply will not believe what she told me." And she pauses, waiting for Lexa to respond to her. Waiting, like a hunter watching its prey slowly step into their trap.

"What did she tell you, Mother?" The words are barely choked out.

Another sip of the drink.

"She said that she saw you at a quant café this morning."

(The trap slams shut.)

"Yes, I do believe she said it was the café on 3rd and Main."

(It breaks a leg, bites into bone.)

"She said that you were not alone. In fact, she told me you were with someone."

(She's stuck, she can't move. She's bleeding and it hurts, but she can't escape.)

"A girl."

(She's panicking – a storm raging in her chest, stealing her air. She's choking – oh god she can't breathe.)

"She told me she saw the two of you kissing."

(Numb. She is numb. Ice replaces the marrow in her bones, and she is numb. To the pain. To the world. To everything.)

The glass is tipped back and the liquid is completely gone. Her Mother stares at her, her eyes dead and unblinking. Lexa can feel her heart thundering behind her ribs, her chest heaving up and down. It's futile, attempting to keep the panic attack at bay, Lexa's hands beginning to shake.

Her Mother continues to stare her down.

"I told her it wasn't true, of course. No, she was wrong. Simply seeing things – mistaken. There was absolutely no way my daughter, my Alexandria, would ever fall victim to such monstrosities. No, I told Colleen. No. My Alexandria does not participate in such vile and immoral acts." Her Mother draws in a deep breath, a terrifying calm soothing her features. The cheery smile drips with venom. "Isn't that right, Alexandria?"

And all Lexa can do is stand there shaking, internally cursing herself. For slipping up. For getting caught. For the tears that make her eyes burn. For the way the spill over and race down her cheeks. For the way she is rooted to the ground in a pure terror she has never felt before.

She can't breathe.

"Mother, I –"

The glass is thrown at the wall by her head, shattering into millions of tiny pieces all around her. Lexa flinches away at the same time her Mother stands up.

"Get out of my house."

Lexa sobs, curling into herself, as shattered as the glass on the floor around her.

"Mother, please, I didn't mean –"

Her Mother rushes up to her, and Lexa can see the red streaks in her eyes, can smell the liquor on her breath. She sobs harder.

"Do you have any idea how embarrassing that was for me? To have Colleen, Colleen, call me, and tell me those things about you?" She takes a deep breath, nostrils flaring. "I am no longer your Mother," and it wraps around Lexa's throat, choking out any air, keeping her from breathing, moving, making any type of noise. She stares in horror at her Mother. Stares as the woman in front of her becomes a statue with a permanent sneer on her face. "You are not my daughter."

Those words are like a kick to the gut, vaulting Lexa in motion again. She stumbles forward to her Mother, hands outstretched to hold onto her hands, hair, clothes, anything she can grab. "No, please, I'm sorry, Mother, I'm sorry. I didn't mean – please – I can't – It's over –"

She registers the sharp sound piercing the air before the stinging in her left cheek.

Lexa brings her hands up to try to sooth the pain as she stares at her Mother in shock. The older woman is openly panting, looking at Lexa with such a wild look in her eye, Lexa can't help but shrink further away.

"I will not tolerate such filth under my roof. I have to go finish my errands that were interrupted earlier, and you will be gone by the time I come back, is that understood."

"Mother, please!"

"You are no longer a part of this family. Do not expect me or your father to reach out to you. Do not try to reach out to us. You are done here."

And her Mother pushes past her, glass crunching under her heels. Lexa holds her breath until she hears the front door open and then slam shut. Arms shaking, she reaches back to blindly feel for the wall before sliding down it. She draws her knees up to her chin, wraps her arms around her legs, and she cries. She sobs. She screams.

She breaks.

For losing her girlfriend and her family in the same day – mere minutes apart.

She cries until she can cry no more.

Enough, Lexa. This is your life now, and you must keep moving forward. There's no point in crying over things you cannot change.

So she shuts down. She pushes herself off the floor and stands on shaky legs, calmly wipes her tears away, and makes her way upstairs. She ignored the photos that line the walls, only staring blankly ahead until she reaches her room.

Lexa takes only a moment to look over her large room and then she walks over to her closet to grab a suitcase.

Methodically, Lexa neatly folds as much of her clothing as she can fit into her bag. She walks into her connected bathroom to grab her toothbrush and comb.

The reflection in the mirror makes her pause.

Her eyes are puffy and red, making the green in them seem almost electric. Her face is pale, making her look ill.

She doesn't recognize herself.

Lexa blinks and lowers her eyes before turning back for her room.

Once the suitcase is filled and zipped shut, Lexa feels her heart stop (again).

"Where am I going to go…?" She bites her trembling lip to keep from crying.

She doesn't really have any close friends from school. She knows she can't go to Costia. She doesn't really have any family – especially family she's close to. She's only seventeen, she can't, shouldn't, really be on her on yet.

She has no one.

… Well … Almost no one.

Lexa walks over to her desk to open her laptop.

It's definitely a long shot, but it's not like I have any other options at the moment…

She pulls up Facebook and quickly begins searching for a name, praying they're actually on Facebook.

For once during this horrible day, luck seems to be on her side. Lexa quickly clicks on the button to type out a message.

Hello Uncle Gustus,

I understand that we have not really spoken much, that our families are not necessarily close, and that this is quite out of the blue. For that, I apologize. I would have preferred reaching out prior to now, but, unfortunately, I seem to have no other choice.

Please feel free to ignore this – you are under no obligation to accept or even consider accepting. I just do not exactly have any other options at the moment.

Lexa takes a deep breath and looks up to blink the tears back before going back to typing, fingers hesitant over the keys.

An … incident has occurred with my family (do not worry, everyone is fine), and I have suddenly found myself without a home. Again, I understand that we are not particularly close, but you are the only real family I have. Or at least know, if only a little bit.

Which leads me to ask if you would be willing to open your doors to me temporarily. I only have one more year until I am eighteen and graduate high school, where I would then be able to support myself. I can obtain a job in the meantime in order to provide rent.

I will understand completely if you do not wish for me to stay with you. I do not want to burden you and your family. I am truly sorry for putting you in this position.

Thank you for at least reading this message.

I hope all is well,

Lexa

She rereads the message at least ten times before hovering over the 'send' button.

Lexa thinks of the sound of shattering glass and clicks.


Lexa only has to sit numbly at her desk for ten minutes before a reply comes. Her heart skips a beat at the sound, forcing her mind to start thinking of who else she could go to. She holds her breath as she opens the message from her Uncle.

I can be there in about two hours.

And Lexa collapses in her chair, head falling into her hands as she is once again overcome with sobs. The sound of a new message has her looking back up, blinking to see through her tears.

If you send me your phone number, I can call you when I get close.

Lexa is about to start typing her number in reply, when another message is sent through.

And you're not a burden, Lexa. You're family.

The tears come harder.


Lexa puts on her bookbag that holds her laptop, chargers, and two of her favorite books, and is about to grab her suitcase when she stops. On her nightstand holds one picture frame that has Lexa's heart hurting the worst.

It's a photo of her and her younger brother, Aden. She had surprised him by taking him to the local carnival during the summer. They had gone on all of the rides, played all of the games (practically going broke in the process), and ate far too much fried food. She and Aden had laughed until they cried, had smiled until they were sure their faces would be stuck like that.

It was one of the happiest nights of her life.

The photo was a ridiculous selfie of the two of them. Lexa had her face painted to make it look like she was wearing war paint, and Aden had a painted lightning bolt on his forehead and round glasses around his eyes. Both of them were pulling a funny face in the photo.

Lexa took the picture frame, and flipped it over to open up the back. She slid her bookbag off and took out one of her books. Slipping the picture out of the frame, she gently placed it in a random spot in her book, before placing it back in her bag.

She walked back over to her desk to take out a piece of paper and a pen.

Lexa wasn't going to leave without saying goodbye to Aden – even if she couldn't do it in person. He was her entire world. Even though he was two years younger than her, Aden always understood Lexa, and Lexa always understood Aden. In a house of tense silence, of work coming before family, of gossip and secrets, they only had each other. And they had promised that they would always be there for one another – they would never leave the other behind.

So it hurts Lexa's heart so much she feel like she might actually die, because she's doing just that: leaving Aden. She won't be able to protect him or take care of him anymore. She won't be able to remind him that there is an entire world outside of this house.

She has to get a new piece of paper when her falling tears smear the ink too much.


Aden,

I just want to say that I'm so sorry. I didn't want this to happen – I never planned on ever leaving you.

But I have to go. You know how crazy Mother can be. Which I'm so incredibly sorry that I'm leaving you with her. I wish I could bring you with me, but she would probably tell the police that I kidnapped you – you and I both know she would do something like that.

Aden, don't let her break you. Remember that you are strong, kind, brave, and are filled with so much compassion. I am so lucky to be able to call you my little brother. You are going to change the world, I just know it.

And, who knows, maybe you'll be able to have my car once you get your license. Which reminds me – don't text and drive. It's completely stupid and if you die in a car accident because you couldn't wait a few minutes to send a message, I will bring you back to life just to kill you myself. I'm serious.

I'm going to be staying with Uncle Gustus. Mother is probably going to shut off my phone as soon as possible, so I'm going to leave you his phone number. I'll get in contact with you once I have my own number.

Have fun during the rest of your freshman year of high school, you nerd. Take a chance on something new, and take a lot of photos.

I'll come back for you as soon as I can.

I love you so much.

- Lexa


Two hours pass very quickly when it's spent preparing to leave the house one grew up in. After Lexa put her letter on Aden's bed, she carried her bags down to the front door. She walked back to the kitchen, carefully stepping over the broken glass.

If she was getting kicked out of her house, she was at least going to make herself lunch before she left.

Lexa was just putting her plate in the sink when her phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hi Lexa, it's your uncle Gus," a deep voice replies. Lexa swallows.

"Hi uncle Gustus," Lexa says and leans back against the granite countertop.

"I'm basically here, kiddo. I just need the code for the front gate."

"Oh, yes, of course. It's 8615. I'll be waiting outside. Do you remember which house it is?"

"Yeah, I remember. I'll be there in a minute."

"Okay. Thank you, again. For doing this." Lexa felt her face burn slightly. She was never completely comfortable with asking for help.

"Of course, Lexa. See you in a second."

"Goodbye."

Lexa puts her phone back in her pocket and walks to the front door, but stops at the one family portrait in the hallway.

They looked too professional for a family. Too forced, stiff. Her smile was so small.

Lexa turns away and grabs her bags.

She leaves the house without another sound.

Lexa only has to wait a few seconds before a large black truck rumbles up the road. She grips her bags tighter and begins walking down the long driveway towards the truck. It's parked and a large man gets out to greet Lexa. He has long dark hair, huge muscles, and a face tattoo. Lexa had seen her uncle's profile picture – him on a motorcycle with a large dog sitting on the road next to him – but she still wasn't completely prepared to meet her uncle. It had been years since she had seen him.

Yet the biggest difference between her uncle and her parents wasn't the long hair, or the muscles, or the truck, or even the face tattoo.

It is the way he grins at her, yells, "Lexa!" and picks her up in a bear hug as if she weighs nothing. She is barely able to cautiously wrap her arms around the man, before she's back on the ground. Her uncle grins at her again.

"Hello, uncle Gustus. It is nice to see you again," Lexa says with a polite smile.

"Sure is, kid! Man, I haven't seen you in forever. It's been, what, ten years?" And Lexa can only smile uncomfortably as her uncle shakes his head sadly. "Oh well! You're going to be staying with me, so we'll have plenty of time to catch up. Lemme get your stuff in the truck and we can head off." He moves to take her bags and put them in the bed of the truck. "Is this everything?" He asks, with his back to Lexa, lifting the bags.

Lexa closes her eyes and sighs.

"Yes."

"That's alright. If you need anything else we can always go out later. Or," and he turns back to Lexa, a serious look on his face, "I can always come back here to get anything for you. I don't know what happened, and you don't have to let me know, but I'll take care of ya, okay?"

It surprises them both when Lexa moves in to hug her uncle. She buries her face in his chest, and he wraps her up in a strong hug.

"Thank you," she whispers. She feels her uncle place a kiss on the top of her head.

"I told you, you're family, Lexa. Family takes care of family. Always."

Lexa steps out of the hug and quickly swipes under her eyes.

"Still. I appreciate this more than you know."

And uncle Gustus just smiles at her.

"Alright, enough of this emotional crap. If you have everything you need, we can head on back." Uncle Gustus ruffles her hair before walking around to get in the other side of the truck. Lexa walks over to the passenger door, but stops before getting in.

She turns and looks at the house she grew up in. A house she never thought she'd be kicked out of.

She turns, gets in the truck, and doesn't look back.

Once she's buckled, she looks to her uncle, to see him smiling at her.

"Now, how about some ice cream?"

Lexa feels her eyebrows furrow, looking to the clock in the truck.

"But uncle Gustus… It's barely past noon."

He pulls away from the house, driving out of the neighborhood.

"You know what, you're completely right," and Lexa nods but stops when uncle Gustus grins back over at her, mischief shining in his eyes. "We should have gotten ice cream a while ago."

They drive out of the neighborhood, away from Lexa's old life. And she should feel sad and heartbroken and she should be crying for everything she's lost – which she did, she still does. But those aren't the emotions that have control of her heart right now.

She is going into something completely foreign, something totally brand new. She has absolutely no idea what's in store.

But, she realizes with a small, quiet smile, that for the first time in a very long time…

She feels hopeful.