King Edmund sat alone in the throne room of Cair Paravel playing with his crown. It was a very odd thing for him to even be in possession of his crown. The siblings' crowns were reserved for special circumstances being that they were made of solid silver and solid gold from the very beginning of Narnian time. This being the case, no one wanted anything to happen to them so they were kept in the secret vault the majority of the time.
Today however, the royalty of Narnia, along with their sizable entourage were about to embark on a journey to Archenland for diplomatic meetings, which meant that crowns were required. Edmund, on the morning of this trip had found himself in the throne room with his crown alone; all three of those circumstances were rare enough but to have them happen all at the same time made the Just King think of when the silver crown had been placed on his head.
Having just defeated the White Witch and only recently realized the error of his ways, Edmund had still had some of his jealousy for Peter bubbling to the surface on their coronation day and he could remember his thoughts vividly.
He had been looking at the four crowns while Aslan had been talking. Obviously the dainty flowery ones were for the girls, and if they weren't, he had been thinking of how soon he might be able to get his off of his head, he had been pretty young at the time. But the crowns he assumed were for himself and Peter, one silver and one gold, were much more appealing and soon took all of his attention. He had been hoping for the gold crown. Obviously whoever got the gold crown would have the most power, and Edmund, while his newly strengthened conscience told him it didn't matter, her really wanted more power than Peter.
Of course, as Aslan placed the silver crown on his young head and proclaimed him King Edmund the Just, Edmund couldn't help but feel disappointed.
*The just what?* He had thought *The just not quite good enough? The just not old enough? Or maybe it was the just not 'Peter' enough.* Edmund had grown up in Peter's shadow. At his coronation, the young Edmund had no desire to find himself in that dark place again. He had tried to cover up his feelings and had mingled and talked and danced the afternoon away.
Aslan always knows though.
Edmund shook his head at his younger self, who could ever think that Aslan didn't know?
Aslan came and found Edmund and pulled him aside. Edmund had never told his siblings that he had been the last one to talk to the Great Lion. Telling them that would mean he would have had to divulge the subject of their conversation and he was too ashamed to do that.
"You are distraught, Son of Adam." Aslan had said as he and Edmund walked along a long hallway.
"Well," Edmund had almost tried to deny it but realized the futile nature of that quickly. "I guess I am, a little bit."
"Why are you distraught?" With His age and wisdom apparent in Aslan's deep rumbling voice, Edmund began to feel silly for his jealousy.
"It's silly really, no big deal." The Lion gazed over at the young boy.
"Emotions are never silly, dear one, they may not make sense to others but they are not to be dismissed too quickly or swept under a rug." Edmund hung his head a little.
"Alright, I am a little jealous, I guess, that Peter got the gold crown." Aslan chuckled but his chuckled didn't make Edmund feel silly, it made him feel like Aslan understood, almost as if the Great Lion had felt the same way at some point in His life.
"Ah, the Gold crown."
"Well, I guess it wasn't the gold crown exactly," Edmund continued. "I mean, gold is better than silver right? So when I got the silver crown and he got the gold one, I just felt, I don't know, like he was and always will be better than me." Edmund let silence fall.
"Edmund, you must understand something, there is nothing that is always better or always more important than everything else. Everything, and everyone, has their time. You were given the title Just for a reason, you will be the one that people come to for sage advice. Peter will not have that privilege. Silver will have it's chance to shine over Gold." With these words, Edmund found himself and Aslan at the lover level of Cair Paravel which opened onto the beach. He had watched for a while as the Great Lion padded across the sand before he headed back to the party upstairs.
That had been years before and Aslan had spoken the truth, Edmund had been able to shine where Peter couldn't and the opposite had also happened. Now, as Edmund looked back he could still feel the same jealousy but now he knew how to control it.
