LA CATRINA

Disclaimer- I do not own the characters or basic plot of the following story. Nor do I know Evangelina Sosa.

IF YOU WOULD LIKE THE STORIES WRITTEN IN SPANISH, WRITE A REVIEW SAYING SO!!

Si cualquier persona quiere leer este cuento en espanol, solo tiene que …como se dice "review"?…y puedo escribirlo en espanol.

Also, this story takes place during/after La Catrina ONE. Not after Ultimo Secreto.

If you haven't seen La Catrina, you might be left in the dark.

Chapter One

(Carlos and Felipe are walking down the street.)

Carlos: You will return to your apartment like all the other North Americans!

Felipe: Jamie is MINE! And so is Maria!

Carlos: BIGAMIST!!! Filthy pig! You leave Jamie alone! I'm the one that sang to her about apples in the street! With a knitted cape on!

(Jamie suddenly appears with Don Silvestre)

Jamie: Don't be stupid; you would both make a goat vomit. My true love is Don Silvestre!

Everyone: What the hell?

Don Silvestre: (mutters something evil)

Paco: Hello? Jamie, take this ring, it was your great-grandma's. Also, take La Jacaranda. And the lawsuits.

Don Silvestre: (poisons the entire working class with corn) Help me in my search for VENGEANCE.

Paco: Damn you Daddy!

Carlos: I CAN"T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! (Sets fire to Operation Aztlan)

Jamie dreams about dancing skeletons and people leaning of her bed shouting thing at her.

Suddenly, a judge appears, there is a long conversation about appetizers, and Don Silvestre picks up some new toadies. A nerdy librarian suddenly appears. Don Silvestre corrupts the entire police force of Oaxaca. And he discovers there is money to be made in illegal art.

Jamie: What the fuck! Carlos, you know I can't stand coyotes. What the fuck?

Suddenly, the entire corrupt police force busts into Jamie's house in L.A.

Entire Oaxacan Police Force: You own a small inn with another "J" name!

Jamie and her nerdy new friend are magically teleported to Oaxaca, thanks to her nerdy friend's art interests.

Rosie: Hey look, an ugly tour guide. I think I'll go ask him out.

Jamie: (suddenly interrogating nerdy tour guide) What I the Jaguar Inn?

Benito (nerdy tour guide): IT IS CURSED!!!

Jamie: Hey. Okay.

The police suddenly apprehend her. (The corrupt Oaxacan toadying police.)

Jamie: (from behind bars) To the embassy!!

Judge: I believe that on this day we have done justice!

Jamie goes back to her apartment like all the other North Americans. But first she marries Carlos.

A/N … There you go. Instead of all that watching videos and testing and schiesse you could have just done that. Pfft. So much for the intelligence of the teachers of America.