Of All The Gin Joints

A little Continuum scene that popped into my head as I was re-watching the movie. A little OOC, but we don't see nearly enough of this stuff!

Rating for one teensy f-bomb, because they don't call it 'mouth like a trooper' for nothing...

Enjoy!

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Jack O'Neill never expected to see her again. Ever. As far as he was concerned, that little adventure on the ice was done, dusted and forgotten.

Until she walked into the same bar he was occupying, sat down at the opposite end and ordered a Guinness, 'the biggest you got'. Judging by the way her head didn't look up from the glass and she wasn't sitting near any mirrors or reflective surfaces, he figured she hadn't even seen him- hadn't been looking for him when she had chosen this particular dive for a drink. And why would she? He was, after all, on her turf. A personal cross-country meeting with an old friend in Chicago called him from his home in Colorado Springs, not her. And certainly not the crazy story she had told him about another life they were supposed to be living.

He still hadn't forgiven her for her suggestion that the world would be better off without his son, though the thought made his spine shiver for other reasons he'd never admit.

And he still couldn't bring himself to believe their story, even if his inner smart-guy demanded it.

Still, as he watched her at the bar- taking huge mouthfuls of her beer and letting silent tears fall- he couldn't help but feel a little sorry for the woman who was supposed to be dead.

And so he got up and went over to her.

She looked up immediately, her senses still keen, and her eyes went wide before she diverted her gaze to her drink.

"Oh, God, I'm sorry. I should... I'll go..." she started, and either she was a stickler for the rules, or there was something about him that made it unbearable for her to be in the same room with him.

"Hey, it's okay, it's okay. I'm not here to hound you"

He watched as she wiped the tear tracks from her cheeks, her long hair covering the motion, before she looked back up. "You're not?"

He was a little offended that she sounded so surprised. Had he been that much of an ass on the sub, that she expected him to immediately report her for an honest mistake?

"No. I'm not. I just saw you walk in and thought it would be rude to leave without saying hello"

"Oh"

"Is... that okay?"

She looked up to him then, and he saw clear as day why she was so skittish around him. The raw pain on her face affected him more than he'd like to admit, and she immediately looked away.

"Yeah. Sure"

She didn't sound so sure.

"Really? Cause... I can go..."

"No. Stay" she said, almost too quickly, and he got the impression that she was waging a war within herself whether to stay with him or run in the other direction. He took a bar stool next to her and gestured for another of the same to the barman. There was silence until his drink came, and even then he took a moment.

"So... how're you settling in?"

The hollow huff she let out disturbed him, and he was surprised to see tears once again form.

"You're seriously going to ask me that?" she asked lowly, turning towards him. "You took everything from me" she hissed though clenched teeth, relying on the fact that this version of him didn't matter. "Everything. And you're seriously going to sit there and ask me about my new life, in my new city, in my new reality, like it doesn't mean a thing that I lost my husband and my friends and my life these last six months? I can't believe you"

And with that she stood up quickly, grabbing her purse with force and launching herself towards the door, stalking with the confidence of an enraged woman. Throwing a couple of notes on the bar for his untouched drink, he ran after her, confused and worried and more than a little ticked off that she wasn't the least bit grateful that he had gone out of his way to say hello to her.

"Hey, wait up" he yelled, jogging a little to catch up to her on the almost-deserted footpath.

"Go to hell" she shot back over her shoulder.

"Hey!"

He caught up to her and grabbed her arm, spinning her to face him. She jerked it roughly from his grasp, her face telling him all he needed to know.

"With all due respect, Sir, I'm not supposed to be talking to you. You are disobeying a direct order from General Landry by even approaching me. Now, if you don't mind, I have this wonderful new life that I am just so eager to get back to, and you are making a bad day worse, so good-bye. And if you see me on the street again, please, do me a favour and cross to the other side"

He was impressed by her spunk and sarcasm which reminded him a little of himself, though he didn't dwell on what that might mean. He was also aware that somewhere in those five minutes she had mentioned a husband, and if he was any judge he might just place a bet as to who that husband may be.

"What if I want to buy you a drink, orders be damned?"

"Fuck you"

He started, a little impressed and a lot ticked off.

"Hey, come on, I'm trying to do the right thing here-"

"You missed your chance, Jack. Made your bed, and mine, and Daniel's and Cameron's. Now sleep in it and leave me the hell alone!"

And with that she stalked away, pulling out her keys as she walked up to a little hybrid that so did not suit the woman he just saw. The world may know her as Suzie Peters or Jen Granter, or whatever other name the Air Force decided to stick her with, but Colonel Jack O'Neill just got a taste of Colonel Samantha Carter in full swing, and he liked her, crazy story and all.

He jogged up to her car and stopped her before she eased in, her hand on the top of the open driver's door that was between them.

"Hey, listen, I didn't mean-" he started, more gentle this time. "What I mean is... God, I-"

"You have no idea what to say. I know" she said, calmer though she still wouldn't meet his eyes.

And he got the feeling that she really did.

"I know your life sucks. I know I caused a lot of it. I know you probably don't want to talk to me-"

"Not you, no" she said softly, cutting off his lame attempt to placate her with a roll of her eyes that didn't quite fit.

He regarded her for a moment- the dark circles under her eyes, her 'I don't care what it looks like' hairdo, her inconspicuous jeans/top/jacket combo. She'd lost weight in the months since he'd last seen her. Fit, healthy and lean, turned sallow and gaunt, either because she didn't care or she just wasn't living the life she used to.

She didn't belong here, and it showed.

"Him?" he questioned softly, stepping to stand beside her on the other side of the open door.

She sucked in a breath, her gaze directed down the street.

"You were close?"

"You could say that"

Deflection, defence, shut down. He saw the warning signs.

"Served together?"

"You watched the interview tapes. You know we did"

He wasn't surprised that she knew about his sit-ins with the interviews. He got the feeling she knew quite a lot about him.

"Relationship?"

She sucked in another breath, this one aimed at holding in the tears that had once again formed. Her hand tightened on the top of the car door, though she didn't dare move.

"You could say that" she repeated hoarsely, the words sticking in her throat as she ducked her chin.

"Married" he whispered, more a statement than a question, his sympathy genuine, his brow furrowed.

She let out a watery huff, before composing herself and looking at him briefly. She looked down the street again as a stray tear fell, and she wiped it away quickly. Her hand was shaking, and he placed his on top, the action seeming to startle her.

When she saw that he was simply trying to help, a new wave of grief seemed to come over her, and it took all her willpower to hold it in.

"I'm sorry" he whispered. "If I could send you back-"

"Wouldn't matter" she said, her voice trembling. "I... God, I... watched you die. He just grabbed it- and I couldn't stop-"

She held a hand to her mouth, holding something in- keeping something secret. Jack placed a hand on her shoulder and another sob escaped, her forehead falling to rest on the hand still holding the top of the car door.

"Either way I've lost you for good" she whispered, sounding like she couldn't quite believe her own words. Had they really cheated death so many times that it was hard to believe? Did she really think he was that infallible?

Jack moved his hand over her shoulder in circles, though he didn't dare offer more. She looked up at him, standing straight again, her eyes a little red and puffy, her chin quivering once before she caught her bottom lip in her teeth.

"Today was our first wedding anniversary"

He sucked in a breath. So little time. Not even half a year together, and here she was mourning the death of her husband. His head bobbed to the side as a look of empathy crossed his face, and he couldn't deny that he thought briefly of his ex-wife in her new house with her new husband.

Sam watched him for a moment, judging his reaction as genuine and allowing herself to take just the tiniest amount of comfort his touch was offering.

"I just miss him... so much" she whispered, and he pulled her to his chest as her tears finally fell free, the silent sobs shaking her shoulders as he lightly wrapped his arms around them. Though her words did little to ease the guilt pooling in his stomach, and they confused the hell out of him, he let her talk to his chest.

"I thought I could take it. I thought... but God, I can't even speak to Daniel. Daniel, our best friend... and Cam- I've known twenty years- since the Academy- and they're on the other side of the country. My family are dead, my friends don't know me, and I'm at home and he's not there, and..."

She cried harder, clutching at his shirt, though she was virtually silent. She didn't strike him as the crying type, and something told him she'd be embarrassed as hell when she was done.

"I never thought it would hurt this much to lose him. After all the waiting- all that wasted time- I thought... but God..."

"Shhh, Sam. It's okay to cry" he said, rubbing her back and remembering the few tears he cried when Sara finally left him to his job and his secrets for want of a man who would talk to her. A life lived in the dark will leave you alone, she had said, standing at the door with the last suitcase in hand. And he'd taken his accumulated sick-leave, picked up his very-much-alive son and spent three glorious summer months at a log cabin ensuring his boy knew he was loved and it was all Jack's fault he had two houses now.

A life lived in the dark will leave you alone, he thought, even if you don't choose it.

She pulled away, far too soon, and wiped her eyes and sniffed, running her hands over the wet patch on the chest of his polo.

"I'm sorry, Sam" he said, stopping her hands. "I'm sorry that you're in this mess, and I'm sorry that there isn't anything I can do"

"You've done enough" she replied croakily. "You listened, and you didn't report me even though we both know you should. You're here, deliberate or not. On this day, you're here... for now- that's enough"

And with that she got in her car, the boundary once again established as she rolled down her window. He stuck his hands in his pockets as he waited for what she had to say. She seemed to think for a moment, summing up the words in her head.

"I loved him. Really loved him. I still do"

He nodded. Him. A deliberate and necessary distinction. Accurate.

"I'm glad your son is alive, Jack", she said finally, wiping the last of the tear tracks from her cheek as her resolve strengthened. "I would have given anything to see him without that burden..." she stopped and ducked her head. "Well... almost anything"

"It may not mean much... but he was lucky to have you"

And he meant it. She was one hell of a woman- astronaut, physicist, space traveller, whatever. Wit, spunk, spirit. He could see why he'd marry her.

"Thank you" she replied, and he nodded to the double layer in her words. "I don't think... I mean, if you see me again... around-"

"I won't bother you for a drink. I get it. Pretty crappy investment, buying a girl a drink when she's in love with another guy"

She smiled at his lame joke, and the fact that she found his humour amusing confirmed it- he would have liked to have known her better, if given the chance.

"You take care. And... give Charlie a hug next time you see him. For Jack"

He nodded, knowing the second he touched down again in the Springs he would do just that.

When the strange ships came six months later, he wanted to be surprised, but all he could hear was her voice in his head telling him about the mistakes that had made this world, and instead of joining the fight, he picked up his son and went up north, to a little cabin by the lake where nobody could find them. And, with any luck, Miss Genius and her bad of merry men would find a way to fight back.