Making Good Conversation
Sue had always believed in the power of new media. As she told her students many times, it was through MySpace that Madonna had become the most famous music star alive. Though that was not quite true, Sue wanted to find that little Madonna inside herself and score a million hits on profile sites. Sure, she had been a celebrity for a wile now due to her show at day time television. Occasionally people asked her for autographs or workshops with the elderly. One look at Sue's Corner already made it clear that Sue had perspective, an opinion, and wasn't afraid to be heard. YouTube was something different though. She had gotten a fresh look at Olivia Newton John's spandex, and she had to admit that it was great. Exercising in front of a few semi-naked men was as much of a let-down as Will's hair, but seeing that blonde bend over felt like heaven was beaming down at one Sue Sylvester personally. Olivia sometimes caught her peeking and smiled.
'I was thinking, how about we put our hands on the table, like for real? With the lyrics, you know. That'd be so artistic,' Olivia told her, pointing at a table standing behind the camera.'
'I like the way you are thinking. Very literal. Very textual.' Sue nodded. 'Hey, you two, go get that table, and move it. This isn't some beach you can just go David Hasselhoff on. Yes, exactly.'
'Like, and then we put them on. Like in that scene in Grease, you remember that? Except that that was nail polish.'
Olivia's smart references were getting to Sue. She had found her match. It would be interesting to stroke that blonde hair. She was as much aroused by it as by Will's overdone hair cuts. Associating Olivia with Will felt kind of weird, so she shook that off quite quickly.
'It needs to be bad-ass choreography, the kind of martial arts Bruce Lee movement. We're serious. Our hands can slam through brick walls,' Sue said, tapping the table.
'I like that. It's empowered. Like our video, which is about empowerment.'
'Like the song. Your song is my feminist work-out song for a reason.'
Olivia giggled a bit. 'I know it's a good song.'
She was so secure, a security only Sue recognized. 'Exactly. You are good and you know it. Like me. We're exactly alike. Well, except that we are not because you would be much taller and prettier and the song would turn all Freudian if two Sues would be singing it. Though I like the thought of that.'
'If only we could copy ourselves, ey?'
'Yes, the other me would substitute Hilary Clinton and become the next president of the USA.'
'Right. Now, let's do the scene. Kind of like this.' She put her hands on the table.
'Or more like this,' Sue moved behind Olivia and touched her hands. 'Use a bit more force.' Behind them, the semi-naked men were still exercising and Bobby, some kid they hired from the video club, was yawning behind the camera. 'Good, good, now slam.' Olivia's hands were smooth, Sue noticed, when she moved them downward. Sue was feeling just as bicurious as in high school when it was just a phase.
'I think I got the hang of it,' Olivia nodded.
'Great. Let's make it real ruthless, I'll stare at you.'
'Predators!'
'Exactly! Start taping, Bobby,' Sue shouted.
'Alright. It's on. I think,' the kid muttered.
'What will we be doing?' Guy nr. 11 asked.
'Standing there, you'll be looking all forced and stern, hands behind your back,' Olivia said. 'Very symbolic.'
'Very,' Sue complimented.
'Great. Okay, go.'
Guy nr. 3 coughed in the middle. Sue yelled at him. They shot it again. It was good. Sue could tell by the vibes she got from Olivia.
'I want to do something sexy,' Olivia said. 'I want to slap one of them on the butt, or something like that.'
Sue felt a bit jealous. Slap them where now? These were not guys; they were pure meat. How could she even be interested in touching those porn stars? Instant lupus.
'I'm not sure. I want them to do push-ups, show some strength, some masculinity, and we'll be towering over it. We don't slap - that's pathetic. We are dominatrixes of this gym, you and me,' Sue said. 'That's what they go for on YouTube, content, not another happy slapping movie in which some drunken students gets spanked all over.'
'I'm not sure, you know, when we shot Grease we knew a bit of violence and a rough edge captured viewers. People like naughty people, punks. That's why I joined the biker gang at the end of the movie.'
'Yeah, that always struck me as out of character, but anyway, maybe like, a pet on the back. Not that I care, or anything.'
'People expect a slap.'
'I guess so, but then I want to slap too.'
'Be my guest.'
Sue sighed. 'Maybe at the final shot somewhere, I was still thinking, we need ropes. Jumping ropes. Lots of them.'
'Great. And we are not using them, right? Because I'm not really as sporty as I might seem. Getting a bit older, you know.'
'Nearly thirty too, ey? I see what you mean. It's like hitting a kind of magical ceiling. Suddenly, we aren't youth anymore, but part of the elderly. Not that I would know about it, I'm 28.'
'Of course you are. So will you be jumping up and down with that rope?'
'No. I think it's a stronger statement if we both just look down a bit.'
Guy nr. 2 looked like he was about to make a suggestion. Guy nr. 5 said: 'It's jump ropes for all of us then?'
'Maybe three of you will be doing push-ups.'
'Alright, miss.'
'Big buffoons, all of them,' Sue muttered.
'But sexy right?'
Not really, Sue wanted to say, but she kept her mouth shut for once. When they shot the final scene, she slapped Olivia on the butt playfully. 'Might as well be you then, more provocative. Add a small lesbian layer there, some subtext. They'll appreciate that.'
'If you ever touch me again, I'll break your hands,' Olivia cried out. And boy, did she mean it. As straight as Ricky Martin himself.
'Reading you loud and clear, blondie. Well, it's a wrap then. Pizza's anyone?'
'Chinese,' Olivia sighed and Sue even imagined she caught a vague hint of smile somewhere on that face. Or maybe a wrinkle. Yeah, the age gap would have torn them apart in a week anyway.
