I woke up to sunlight streaming in through the window, lighting up my body and the persons next to me in a watery halo. I moaned as I tossed my hand over my face, trying to shield myself and gain entrance back to the land of slumber. Alas, no matter how hard I tried and begged with the angel of sleep it would not happen so I gave up and swung my legs out of bed.

I stood up and struggled to pull the hem of the black dress down to cover my upper thighs. Sparing a glance at the ribbon of red hair strewn across the white sheets I dawned on me that the person woke up beside was Clary. Glancing around I sleepily deduced this wasn't my room and instead I was in my friend, in honesty my best friend's bedroom. It all came flooding back to me in an overwhelming wave. The cabinet meeting, the unexpected admission of my mother, me telling her about my addiction and… Raphael's rejection to my desire to fight for my love. I remembered seeing his back retreating and the pain soaring in my chest as I realized that it's all good and well to fight for your love but it needs to be reciprocated and in this case, it wasn't.

Shaking my head from my thoughts I strode over and shut clary's curtains. Just because I was rudely awoken doesn't mean she needs to be. Before I shut the curtains fully is saw the black tear tracks down her cheeks and my heart ached for the girl who was slowly becoming my sister. I wasn't the only one to have a bad night.

I pulled the blanket over her, placed a chaste kiss on her temple before leaving the room and softly shutting the door behind me. I knew I needed to have a shower and try wash away the negativity that was clouding my brain. It slowly dawned on me I'd have to fix the ache in my heart before I saw him at the next cabinet meeting.

With my goal set I briskly strode towards my room. After Clary moved in she had been placed down the hall from me so it was an easy walk and thankfully no one saw me. Once I was in and I had shut the door behind me I haphazardly struggled out of my dress and turned on the water. I busied myself with getting my towel ready and ensuring I had my favourite jasmine scented shampoo ready. I was in the mood to treat myself, so sue me.

Once I deemed the temperature perfect I slipped inside the small stall and tossed my head back. The water felt like a gentle caress stroking my hair, reminiscent of my mother's hand stroking my inky locks when I was a child. I scrubbed my body and hair until they were shining and didn't get out until the water became tempered, ready to make the final transition to cold.

I stepped out and wrapped my hair in towel before drying my body and massaging lotion into my legs. Once I had methodically completed my routine I busied myself by blow drying my hair until it hung in glossy sheets around my body with a slight wave through it. I pulled out my makeup and painted my face, hoping that if I concealed my features I could conceal my pain too. Once I had artfully completed it, leaving only my lips bare I dropped my towel encasing my body and strode to the wardrobe in my room. Giving my wardrobe a cursory glance over I pulled out the first outfit I could find. I had organized my clothes into complete outfits which I was severely thankful for as I didn't have the energy to think about such a task.

I pulled on my black pointe pants, the knees ruched and silver zips around my hips. I slithered into a tight maroon tank top that ended at my belly button. I usually wore dresses but I couldn't be bothered today it just made me think of the night before. I picked out my black rib length leather jacket and decided to forgo the blood red lipstick I usually favoured. All it did was make me think of Raphael. Upon this thought I looked at myself before pulling off my top, the vivid colour making memories surge. I instead pulled on a black corset that emphasized my chest and chose a dark purple colour to stain my lips with.

Finally satisfied I left my room. At first, I was going to check on Clary but knew after her breakdown she'd want some time alone. I instead decided to throw myself into my work, put my head up high and strutted into the control office determined not to think of the man who held my heart. I ignored my brothers confused expressions at my different appearance and instead asked them if they had a mission for me.

Alec as usual looked a bit uncertain but after sharing a glance with Jace who shrugged instead gave me a mission. It was an easy one. There had been report of an increase of demon activity around a local park and they wanted me to go scout the area. Jace suggested I bring someone with me but one glare from me silenced him.

I told them I'd go now before turning on my heel and strutted back to my room. I knew what I was wearing would get to many looks and I needed to blend in to make my mission a success. I walked to my other wardrobe and looked for a few disguises I had. I picked out a plain black tank top and some navy jeans and coupled it with some black heeled combat boots that wasn't as high as my usual ones. I pulled my hair into a high pony, grabbed my supplies and was out the door before anyone could say anything.

I sent a quick text to Clary letting he know I was out and asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee later and let Alec know I had left. I pocketed my phone and ignored the buzzing as I meandered my way to down town park.

After about half an hour I reached it, glamoured myself and immediately felt sick. All around me couples gazed at each other lovingly and it made the ache in my chest worsen. Pretending I wasn't bothered I continued looking around the area looking for any sign of demons.

I couldn't find any demons during my scouting mission but I found demon residue on some trees and other foliage. I took some samples to be tested so we would know what we would be dealing with. Pleased with my work I fished out my phone to see three new messages.

The first was Alec saying he got my message, the second was Clary saying she didn't feel like Coffee but was keen for a girl's night that night to which I smirked out. Clary had come out of her shell when she ascended her birthright of being a shadowhunter and I couldn't be prouder. She and I were closer than I thought possible and I felt myself loving her like a sister. A small niggly part inside me thought maybe just maybe I had been too hasty in not wanting a parabatai and maybe Clary was the one for me. I quickly shoved the thought away and focused on reading the next message. Besides she probably didn't want one and I was so set in my ways why would she want me? None the less I stored it away for future thought and proceeded to read the next message. To my extreme surprise, it was Sebastian asking if I wanted to do some training with him later to which I responded yes.

On my way home, I couldn't help but let my thoughts drift to Raphael and wonder what he was doing and if maybe, just maybe he was thinking of me too.

A surge of satisfaction assaulted my bloodstream as my fist contacted my opponent's nose. The force sent him falling backwards and a loud band reverberated throughout the training room. As he attempted to stand up I swung my body around, letting my foot make contact with his face and send him sprawling again. I flipped my body over and ended up pinning him beneath me, getting out my dagger and holding it to his throat.

Sebastian smirked and nodded at me, letting me know he was conceding defeat. I smirked at him and helped him up; striding across the room to the mini freezer and pulling at an ice pack. I spun around and threw it at him, my hair flaring out from its confines on top of my head. He nodded his thanks before leaning back and reclining against the wall. His hair flopped into his eye as he winced while holding the cold pack to his swelling cheek.

I immediately felt guilt swirl in my stomach. I went too hard on him for a training battle. I knew this but I just needed a release from the pent-up emotion swirling though my body. When he offered me this chance I took it.

"Sorry about that, think I went a bit overboard" I said, sending him a weak smile and avoiding eye contact.

"No worries, glad you got whatever was bugging you out of your system. Want to talk about it?" he asked, moving closer to me but still favouring his left leg.

"it's no big deal, just typical teenager stuff" I said forcing a laugh out of my throat.

He looked at me expectantly before I relented and told him all the sorry details. By the end of the story sobs were wracking my body even though I fought to defy them. I was a strong girl, something stupid like emotions should be my downfall, right? Boys were just a distraction and if you let them they had the power to hurt you. Hearts are fragile things and even once healed they never go back to their former glory, my mother was a testament to that.

I wiped my eyes and risked a glance in his direction, expecting to see pity radiate from his eyes. Instead he looked at me knowingly and had a small smile on his face, one that sent spasms of discomfort down my spine.

"Huh, guess that leech does care about you enough to let go of his addiction after all" He said, shifting his weight to release the pressure of his injured leg.

I looked at him in confusion before demanding that he explained. He just shrugged and looked at me, said I was a smart girl and could figure it out if I so desired. I kept my expression but crossed my arms, over my exposed stomach, making my chest lift in the sports bra I had on. I tapped my foot impatiently and looked at him, waiting for the mystery to be reviewed.

He looked at me before sighing and explaining about his… chat he had with Raphael. Anger exploded inside me in an uncontrollable burst as he finished explaining the abhorred things he dared say to Raphael. I had to fight against my own misconceptions about love and it was a struggle. Ever since I was a young girl, since discovering my father's betrayal to my mother I had viewed men negatively. I vowed to never let a man in and give him the chance to hurt me. Objectively, Sebastian had helped me fulfil my vow by chasing Raphael of but that's when it struck me. I didn't want to uphold my vow anymore. I swallowed my own pride and admitted to myself what I had been avoiding. I, Isabelle Sophia Lightwood loved Raphael Dimitri Santiago.

Upon that revelation, I promptly slapped the person who drove him away in the first place, yelled at him for getting in my affairs and did what I was best at.

I ran away.

Clary later found me. She was dressed to the nines and looked ready to hit the town. She came waltzing in my room looking the happiest I had seen her for a while. I didn't know if she was just trying to put on a brave front or trying to trick herself into thinking she was happy but I knew it was not real. When she saw me crying into my hands she raced forward and held me. She just let me cry, not asking what was wrong until the body wracking sobs had seized and I just hiccupped. Grabbing a tissue, she wiped off the eye makeup coating my cheek and gently asked me to explain.

I don't know what it was. Maybe the way she looked at me or the gentle voice she used but I let everything tumble out. Told her about my conversation with my mother, malior's flirting and how he helped me get max, the guilt I felt about letting max get kidnapped, Sebastian and lastly Raphael. She just stroked my hair like the water did this morning and let me talk. She never once interrupted and when I had explained everything and cried myself out, instead of telling me everything would be ok she simply pulled me towards her and hugged me tightly. It was as if she thought the strength of her hug could make all the cracked pieces come together again.

We stayed like this for a while before I forced a laugh out, wiped my eyes and apologized for being silly. She turned me around so I faced her and in a tone iv never heard her use before told me I had nothing to be ashamed of. She told me I had the right to express myself and that anyone who said otherwise would face her. I let out a laugh that turned into a sob and he hugged me again, stroking my hair and helping me calm down.

Once this second episode was over she looked at me and asked what I wanted to do. It took me a minute to realize what she means and once I did I let out the first watery smile since my breakdown.

"I need a release, give me an hour and we can hit the town" I said smiling at her. I shooed her away to which she laughed and ran out the room as I hit her ass playfully.

She sternly told me I had an hour tops before letting the laugh she had been holding out and ran out of the room.

I smiled before having my second shower of the day and I thought maybe, just maybe having a parabati wouldn't be as bad as I thought.

An hour and a half later Clary and I were striding into the club, faces full of makeup and a confident aura surrounding us. I smirked as I heard cat calls and wolf whistles, knowing that both me and my soul sister looked extremely hot. As if wanting to attest to my statement I caught our reflections in a window and smirked. We looked good.

Clary had her hair curled and up in a high pony; two strands framing her petite face. She had a wicked cat eye and a nude lipstick, making her face pop. She wore a black halter neck top showing no cleavage but her back was open and held together by two strings tied in a bow at the small of her back. The top was tight and matched well with the black ruched pointe pants and high stiletto heels. She had a chain belt that crossed around her pelvis and matched her white feather earrings. Her outfit looked hot and complimented my bright red lace bralette the ended between my breasts and my belly button. I finished off my outfit with a floor length black high low skirt, the high part ending around my mid-thigh and the gauzy material flew behind me as I walked. My hair was straightened and I had two pieces puffed up in a quiff on top of my head. I had two big silver hoops, my bracelet whip and bright red satin stilettos completing my outfit.

I smiled at the bouncer who let us in without looking at our ID's, his eyes fixated on my breasts and Clary's long legs. We breezily walked in, my hips swinging in my low hanging skirt and the double layered material flew around my ankles. Nodding at Clary we went to the bar and downed the two vodka shots given to us on the house.

Downing two more we sauntered over to the dance floor and move our bodies provocatively to the music. I pulled her close and slut dropped on her making her throw he head back in laughter. She grabbed my hand and spun me around letting my hair and skirt float around me. As we dance we captivated the mundanes. They were entranced by my dark enteral looks and Clary's striking beauty.

I finally felt a slight buzz starting and pulled her to the bar, both of us downing two more shots, this time whiskey. Clary pulled a face and laughed at my expertly composed face before shaking her head and pulling me again. Whenever a guy got close to one of us the other spun the other away and out of their desperate grips. It was exhilarating and made my confidence grow as I felt their attraction to me. Or maybe that was the liquor making me think that.

The night carried on in this manner, Clary and I having various alcohols including a few cocktails and dancing the night away. The pumping music invigorated us and made us gyrate our hips to the beat of the songs. We stayed here for a while before changing to another club and repeating the process. This time I strung along a few guys which made Clary shake her head in fake disapproval.

All in all, I was having a blast but sadly the clubs started to empty out and I knew our fun and much needed girl's night was ending.

Clary and I couldn't contain out giggles as we leant on each other and traipsed thought-out New York. Our steps shaky in our heels and our bodies swaying from the copious amounts of alcohol we had consumed. Everything was funny to us and the danger of two drunk girls, even if they were shadow hunters didn't even register on our minds.

We stagged forward, clary losing her balance and falling and pulling me down with her. We landed in a bundle of limbs, both of us laughing and not recognizing the we could have been seriously injured.

I pulled myself up and bent down to pull my swaying friend up. I had enough sense to look at her with concern as she turned green before racing to the nearby dumpster and vomited. I looked at her with concern and mild disgust before smiling at her when she returned. She looked much healthier having vomited up the excess alcohol in her system and her swaying had lessened. I was just about to pull her forward before a cold and calculating voice stopped me in my tracks.

"Hello little shadow hunter, you are a long way from your little institute, aren't you? Ooh is that alcohol I smell? That just makes me thirstier" the voice said.

My vision was fuzzy but I saw the man walk out of the shadows and he was undeniably a vampire. His shoulder length honey coloured hair fanned his white face. His blood red lips hosted fangs that had sunk out. His old-fashioned clothes hinted at his age but the smirk he wore showed he was modernized. The lilt to his words showed he wasn't originally from her but I was broken out of my musings as I caught our gazes. I felt my mind leave my body and it was all I could do but follow his voice in my mind. He was gorgeous and all I wanted to do was be close to him and give him my blood.

Behind me I was dimly aware of Clary as she was turned into a human blood bag but any clarity was removed from me when I felt fangs pierce my skin.

I was floating. I wasn't aware of where the floor was and where the ceiling began. My body became pliant and I lent on his hard chest. His cold hands kept me upright as my blood was released from my veins.

Just as I was close from death he was ripped away from me; his fangs ripping my throat and pain was able to pierce through the fog. Behind me I heard Clary fall to the ground as another figure saved her. I was dimly aware of a piercing screaming and felt something wet splatter on my face. My awareness was fading and I felt as though I was underwater.

The last thing I saw was this angel face and I knew that if there were faces like this in heaven, I'd be okay before relenting to the darkness enticing me to let go.

Pain was all I felt. The throbbing resided in my neck and was all encompassing. I whimpered and opened my bleary eyes, trying to move my arms beneath me but my weakened muscles refused to hold my weight. I glanced around and was surprised to see the fresh and extortionate surroundings that could only be Raphael's apartment.

Pain flooded my heart at this revelation and was increased when I saw his lithe form making his way towards me. Pain clouded his gorgeous black eyes, the intensity of it startling me.

"Hey" I managed to croak out, a small smile adorning my features. He breathlessly let out his own greeting before returning to running his gaze scrutinisingly over my features to ensure I was okay.

"Where's Clary?" I asked once I got my breathing back under control.

"she's safe, In the lounge recuperating" he said, his velvety voice curving around each syllable and causing liquid to pool between my thighs.

He smiled knowingly at me before leaning down and kissing my forehead chastely before turning and beginning to walk away

"Wait" I called desperately causing him to turn around and raise his eyebrow expectantly.

Once he understood I wanted him to stay he sighed, about to deny me before seeing the desperation

in my features. He nodded before lying down and bringing my close to him. He stroked my hair as I drifted off to sleep. Before I was fully asleep I muttered one sentence that unintentionally completely threw him.

"I love you"

I stretched out my tired muscles and let out a little groan in the process. I sleepily nuzzled into my pillow before frowning at how hard it was. I sleepily lifted my head and smiled once my shock had settled when I saw the smiling face of Raphael.

I snuggled in closer, taking peace at being in his arms again. I opened my mouth to speak but he quietened me before leaning over and giving me some food and water.

I smiled thankfully before hungrily ingesting my food. Only pausing when the ache in my head intensified.

"Isabelle. last night you said something, I don't know if you remember but I threw me. Never in my years of immortal life has someone said this to me, do you remember?" he asked to which I uncharacteristically responded by shyly nodding.

"I talked to that weasel Sebastian and he told me what he said to you. Raphael, you are not bad for me. As I said last night I love you. So much. I never thought I'd be able to open my heart to someone after the way my dad treated my mum but you… you make be believe in love again. My mother told me a few nights ago, that when you find love fight for it so that's what I'm doing. I don't care about the immortality issue or that fact you are asexual. All I need is you" I declared passionately staring in his eyes beseechingly.

" Isabelle…are you sure? You will be hated and must deal with all the strife the Shadowhunter community will throw at you. Not to mention eventually my asexual nature will become an issue along with my immortality. Are you sure you are ready for this?" He asked looking at me with concern but also thinly veiled hope.

Instead of answering I placed a chaste kiss on his lips before uttering I'm sure. His smile made my heart race and desire to pool in my stomach but I swallowed it down. I loved him and you make sacrifices for those you love.

After spending some time together, we ventured out to see an equally weak Clary who was nibbling at some food another vampire had given her. Upon seeing our clasped hands, she winked at me and sent me a smile that made my own smile form on my face. Raphael explained to us that he had dealt with the vampires accordingly and he would escort us back to the institute personally.

Clary and I smiled at each other before separating into different rooms and shrugging on the clothes that had been laid out for us.

Raphael's driver had driven us back to the institute. Immediately Clary thanked him, winked at me before scurrying inside to give us some time alone.

I smiled at him before snuggling close to him, letting him wrap his arm protectively around me.

"You sure you want to do this?" he asked for the umpteenth time and it struck me how irrevocably and completely in love with him I was.

"I'm sure" I responded before nuzzling his nose and exiting the car, making sure no sunlight touched him.

I had a new bounce in my step as I skipped up the institute steps, smiling my new boyfriend before he sped away.

I turned around, a love-sick sigh escaping my lips before I came face to face with a serious faced maryse.

"So, have a good time last night?" She asked, her gaze going over me reproachfully.

Normally I would buy into this and argue with her but instead surprised us both and threw myself into another mother- daughter hug. At first, she was to shocked to respond but eventually hugged me back eventually though I could tell she was still surprised.

"What was hat for?" she asked, bewildered at my unusual behaviour. Instead of replying I kissed her check and skipped off before pausing at the doorway of a corridor and turning to her.

"You were right mum, maybe love is worth fighting for" I said smiling before skipping down the hall way humming and tune and completely missing the pleased smile my mother wore.

Meanwhile maryse stood there smiling fondly at her daughters retreating form and let one thought surround her mind.

She knew she was going to have to talk to Isabelle later and figure out who this mystery man was and whether he was suitable for her daughter but for now she let her daughter have this moment for angel knows if anyone deserved it, it was Isabelle.

Maryse continued down the Corridor into the control centre and couldn't stop the happiness flowing through her veins. Her son was head of the institute and was happily in love, able to be himself for the first time. Her other son was going to become a shadowhunter and her his runes soon and she couldn't be prouder.

However, the one thing that caused the smile to remain on her face was Isabelle. She knew her daughter's opinion on love and after her talk with her the night of the cabinet it made more sense. She was devastated at having made her daughter view love like that but was so grateful at whoever made Isabelle reconsider, angel knows how hard that was.

I'm glad you're happy my daughter, angel knows you deserve it, I thought before making my way to my son. I may have been unlucky in love but it seems my children weren't and they were succeeding in life.

And really, that's all a mother could ever ask for.

Hi everyone, hope you enjoyed my one shot. I just finished watching he newest shadowhunter episode and was heartbroken upon seeing Izzy and Raphe ending like that and decided to take matters into my own hands.

Hope you guys enjoyed and feel free to let me know what you think and if you think I should write more stories for this fandom.

Thanks, all

Shadows