Passion of the Moment

by Withered Black Rose

Rating: T

Summary: Roxas has just told Axel he's leaving the organization for good. When he comes to say goodbye, Axel is left with a choice: Does he confess his feelings to his long-time partner and best friend, or just let him walk out forever? YAOI

Warnings: Yaoi M/M Don't like, don't read. Thanks.

Spoilers: None

Pairings: AkuRoku (AxelXRoxas)

A/N: The first little bit of this story was written a whole year before the rest of it, so if it doesn't seem to flow just right, that's why.

You'll notice that I use the word uke in one of last paragraphs. If you don't know what an uke is, the uke is the bottom of any male/male relationship. The seme is the top.

Disclaimer: Kingdom Hearts and its characters do not belong to me. They belong to their inspired creator, Square Enix and Disney. I borrow them without permission, but with great affection. This story is for entertainment purposes only; no money is being made from it.

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It was beyond his understanding. And yet he understood it so well. The red head looked off towards the heart shaped moon and lost himself in thought. Roxas had told him that he was leaving and never coming back. When Axel had asked him why, Roxas had just simply said, "I'm going to find the truth." That was all. It was beyond anything Axel could understand. What truth? What was there that Roxas could not understand?

Axel sat there for hours pondering these thoughts when there came a soft knock at his door. Instinctively, he smiled. He could recognize that knock anywhere. Roxas had come to say goodbye.

Axel went over to the door and opened it, confirming his thoughts. Roxas smiled at him, good natured as always. He had no idea of what he was destroying in Axel by leaving. Axel smiled back and let him in. As he did, Roxas' hand brushed his arm. Axel shivered and time seemed to stop. But then the moment passed and Roxas was flopping onto Axel's bed. He looked up at Axel.

"So…"

"I thought you were leaving?" Axel couldn't help himself. Roxas had given him some lame reason for leaving, and yet here he was, taunting and tormenting Axel with his presence. Axel loved the blond kid, but he hated how Roxas was hurting him just by being here.

"What do you mean? Do you want me gone?"

Axel blinked. Did he want Roxas gone? No…What he wanted was to tell Roxas to stay. To stay and be with him. Forever. To love him, and enjoy what feelings they had together. Axel wanted the blonde boy to stay and be his, forever. That's what Axel truly wanted. But how could he tell Roxas all of this?

"So. Do you not know what you want? Or do you just not have the guts to tell me to leave?" Roxas questioned while standing up. His blue eyes locked onto the emerald ones of his lover. All Roxas wanted to hear was a simple, 'stay, please stay,' from Axel. That's all he wanted. But it seemed like Axel couldn't give that to him.

"No! Roxas…Please…" Axel choked on the words he wanted to say. He wanted to say them and yet…He couldn't. 'Why, why can't I tell him?' Axel thought to himself. He looked at Roxas. "Please…"

Roxas blinked, confused. This was completely unlike Axel. Axel always said what he wanted, no questions asked. And if you didn't like what he said, well, he didn't give a damn. But now Axel seemed to be choking on the very words he wanted. Roxas walked over to him and put his hand on Axel's arm. "Are you okay?"

"Roxas…I…I have to tell you something."

"What?"

"But…I don't know how. The words won't come. I can only think of one way to tell you."

"What? Axel, what do you-?"

He was cut off as Axel roughly put his lips on his. Roxas struggled for a second but then instantly went still. Axel's hand had strayed to a dangerous place, and Roxas felt a longing in him for something…Something very bad. Axel's tongue slid around Roxas lips, looking for a way in. Roxas parted his lips, and Axel was in, searching everything, his tongue going everywhere. Axel pushed him back onto the bed and Roxas closed his eyes. He had an idea of what was coming, but he did nothing to further it. It was up to Axel to advance this.

Axel broke apart from Roxas at the last possible moment, his body taking in great gasp of air. Axel looked down at Roxas and saw that he was smiling up at him. Axel loved the look in those bright baby blue eyes. They shone with love and affection, and Axel could see them in his sleep. They were the joy in Axel's darkness. He didn't know how he could stand losing them.

"Roxas…"

"Sssh. I already know."

"Do you? Do you truly know? How-"

"I just do. I feel it when you hold me against you. I feel it in the fire of your body." Roxas snuggled closer to Axel and buried his head in Axel's cloak.

Axel smiled softly and put his head on top of Roxas'.

"Baby…How cute and soft you are, lying here underneath me. How right and perfect the world feels, with you snuggled close to me. Please, who ever is out there listening, please don't let this night end. Please…" Axel closed his eyes and repeated his prayer twice more, for good measure.

"Axel…" Roxas shifted against Axel, snuggling even closer to the warm 20 year old.

Axel looked down and saw that the small blond boy under him had fallen asleep, murmuring softly in his sleep. Roxas had a smile on his lips, his wonderfully kissable lips. Axel wiggled softly against his little Keyblade wielder and put his head on Roxas' chest, resisting the urge to kiss him. He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, breathing in the scent of sea-salt that was Roxas. As he laid there he noticed a soft bump bump, bump bump. He opened one eye and looked at the white wall across his room. 'There's no way…It can't be. We don't have…' Axel smiled softly to himself. He had always known Roxas was special, but he hadn't known he was this special. 'Little Blondie has a heart. Who would have known?'

Roxas shifted again and Axel felt a stir of something in his chest. Something fiery and passionate, and yet at the same time, sad and scared. And then he heard Roxas utter the words he had never in his existence thought he would hear.

"Axel…I hear your heartbeat…so soft…"

A shiver ran down the length of the pyro's spine, the first time he had ever felt such a thing. 'It's not possible…Him maybe, but not me! I can't…How? How did I get something so precious?' Axel's thoughts raced, going in and out at a rate faster than fire eating oil. He didn't know what to do. A heart…What good was a heart to him, when the only thing his heart really yearned for was the blond boy beneath him? Come dawn's burning first rays, the blond boy who held his heart captive would be gone, and Axel's heart would be extinguished like water dumping on a burning fire.

"Roxas…Why…Why do you have to leave me? I understand your pain, I do. But still…Is that any reason to leave those who love you, and those who you love? Why…" Axel's voice trailed off, the held back flickers of emotion rendering him speechless. He shook his head, his sharp red hair hanging into his face and threatening to poke his eyes out.

As Axel laid there, struggling to understand what was going on deep in his soul, the soft rhythm of Roxas' heartbeat slowly lulled him into a calm and then, eventually, into a deep sleep. In it he dreamed about Roxas and all the days of sitting on the edge of the clock tower eating sea-salt ice cream. He dreamed of all the battles they had fought together, guarding each others backs. He dreamed of the fights they had had, and of all the resolutions. And he dreamed of two hearts connected together, beating simultaneously.

As the first rays of dawn shined through his window and into his eyes, Axel realized he felt…lonely. As he opened his eyes he saw not the sweet face of his Roxas, but the blank whiteness of his ceiling. As he stared at the ceiling he saw shapes form in and out of existence. And then he realized what was wrong and his brain exploded as if his fire had finally caught something willing to burn: Roxas was gone.

Gone.

Gone.

And he was alone.

Roxas had left, just as Axel had predicted.

Axel bolted up and looked out the window, hoping for a sign. As his eyes gazed the distant grounds of Castle Oblivion he saw a large group of Nobodies flowing into a portal, intent on something beyond it. Axel pushed his head against the window, already knowing what they were after. 'Roxas…'

Axel pulled his head away from the window and looked down at the ground, a pain forming in his chest. It was a twisting, stabbing, pain, a pain set to kill a person if left untreated. Axel closed his eyes and saw the cute little uke he had laid on top of the night before, the gentleness of the boy he loved. He saw everything he loved in Roxas and the few things that he found annoying all at once, his mind trying to work out why this was all happening.

And then all of sudden, everything clicked.

And Axel knew what must be done.

And the twisting pain in his new-found heart increased, twisting and turning.

Twisting.

Turning.

And threatening to explode inside of him.

As Axel faced the deep-seated truth of Roxas' abandonment, he felt emotions bubble up inside of him.

And as Axel ran out of the door toward the fate that awaited him and Roxas all that he left behind was a single,

Unmistakable,

Tear.

A single drop, like a lone snowflake from a cloud that was barely even there. A single drop to signify every word, every motion, every little breath Axel had ever meant to show, give, or say.

One drop to signify his entire existence in this life.