The evil clowns were chasing him through the funhouse again. They had split up, but Roxas knew there were at least thirty of them total. He ran through a doorway, but skidded to a halt as he realized he was surrounded by...himself. Damn! he thought. He was in that room with all the mirrors again. He ALWAYS ended up in this room and it drove him insane.

Roxas turned. Three clowns crept towards him, gloved hands raised. Roxas pulled out his keyblades, but they turned to rubber chickens in his hands. He dropped them and fell to the ground, cowering in fear.

"Roxas," the middle clown said in a voice that sounded like Zexion's.

"No," Roxas muttered, curling up on the floor in a fetal position. The middle clown reached out his hand.

"Roxas!" The middle clown bent over and started shaking Roxas. "C'mon, Roxas, get up."

Roxas awoke. He was lying in his bed, safe in his room. He blinked twice, then looked up to see Zexion standing over him, looking annoyed.

"You're not a clown," Roxas stated.

"The clown dream again?" Zexion asked exasperatedly. "Why do you continue to watch 'Killer Clowns from Outer Space' if it gives you nightmares?"

"Because it's funny," Roxas yawned, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. He looked over at his clock to see that it was six o'clock in the morning.

"Why'd you get me up so early?" he groaned.

"Gee, I don't know, maybe it's because today's the first day of school and the bus comes in half an hour," Zexion said sarcastically.

"Oh, yeah. Wait, the bus? Aww, why can't you or Axel give Demyx and me a ride?"

"Well, Axel lost all parking privileges last year when he 'accidentally' set his Spanish teacher's desk on fire. As for me, my parking space and some others were given to new staff members and mine hasn't been replaced yet. And we'll be arrested if we go through our portals. So lucky us get to ride the bus. Now, get up and get ready because you do NOT want to be late on your first day of high school."

Zexion left and Roxas commenced to get ready. He showered, got dressed, combed his hair, then went to breakfast. He stopped as he entered the dining room. Axel, Demyx, and Zexion were the only people at the table, Axel and Demyx looking tired and annoyed.

"Where's everyone else?" Roxas asked.

"Um, college," Demyx answered, furrowing his brow at Roxas. "They left last night, remember?"

"Oh...yeah," Roxas said. He wasn't used to being up this early and found he was quite forgetful at this hour. He sat down next to Axel and began to eat a bowl of cereal.

Roxas was glad to be at the same school as some of the Organization members for once. He grinned at the thought of all the trouble he could cause, hoping to have already made a name for himself by the end of his first day as a freshman. Demyx was a sophomore, Zexion a junior, and Axel a senior. That part disappointed Roxas because he would only have a year of high school to wreak havoc with Axel. He decided they would have to make the best of it.

Axel began to down coffee as if it was water in a desert. Roxas had never seen him drink that much coffee and wondered if it was because of not seeing him in the mornings during school days since elementary school.

"He likes to get caffeinated so he has enough energy to cause chaos this early in the morning," Demyx explained.

"That makes sense," Roxas said seriously, watching his best friend chug another cup of coffee.

Ten minutes later…

"Let's get on the bus! Let's get on the bus! Let's get on the BUS!" Axel exclaimed happily, jumping up and down, now freshly energized. He ran out the castle's front door with the speed of a cheetah and the grace of a rhino. Roxas, Demyx, and Zexion followed him at a walk. Axel zoomed around a corner and skidded to a halt at the end of an alley. This was the bus stop for people coming from Castle Oblivion. Roxas and the others stood next to Axel, who was rapidly tapping his foot on the ground like Thumper, the rabbit in "Bambi".

After waiting a few short minutes, a school bus came screeching to a halt in front of the Organization members. Axel zipped up the steps as soon as the doors opened and the bus driver, an old man with white hair that stuck up as if it was constantly being electrified, shook his head as Axel tripped and fell in the aisle of the bus. People laughed, but not meanly; they worshipped Axel. Zexion got on the bus next, taking the nearest empty seat and putting his mP3 player earphones in. Axel stood up and grinned as he brushed himself off. He took an empty seat towards the back and stretched his legs across the aisle, placing his feet on the empty seat across from him. Demyx got on next. He sat in the seat diagonally in front of Axel with his friend, Jimmy, another music fanatic that was a lot like Demyx. Roxas came on last and the bus driver let out a yelp.

"What?" Roxas asked in annoyance.

"You're…you're that kid the pyromaniac told me about at the end of last year!" the bus driver spluttered in fear. "I didn't believe him, but he told me his best friend was coming to the high school this year. He said you were a lot like him." The bus driver groaned. "That's just what I need: two clowns to deal with instead of one." He sighed. "Take a seat, then."

Roxas grinned and walked towards the back of the bus as it began to move. Axel looked up and, at the sight of him, lifted his feet off the seat so that Roxas could sit there.

"I saved that seat especially for you," Axel said. He looked at the other people that were sitting around them. "This," he said proudly, "is Roxas, my best friend…and my pranking partner in crime. Got it memorized? He is a freshman, but he is too awesome for that to matter. Treat him the same way you would treat me, or I will burn your-"

"Desk?" Roxas smirked. "Zexion told me you set your Spanish teacher's desk on fire last year."

Everyone laughed. "Oh, yeah, I remember that," John, a junior said as if lost in a fond memory. "It was so funny. Senora Flemming had told Axel, in Spanish, 'My desk is my empire', and the next thing we all knew, Axel had lit it up. Senora had started yelling at him in Spanish and he had no idea what she was saying and we're just sitting their cracking up."

"Hey, I thought she'd said, 'Light my desk on fire', not, 'My desk is my empire',"Axel said defensively. "I mean, who calls their desk an empire!"

Meanwhile, at F.U., Flippy University, Dean Xemnas sat at a desk in an office.

"My desk is my empire," he said with superiority.

At the same university, Xigbar, Luxord, and Larxene walked into the first class they shared: Psychology. They took seats near each other and took out laptops. Behind their laptops, they signed on to AIM and logged into Organization Thirteen's own private chat room. The professor entered and soon began a lecture that Xigbar, Luxord, and Larxene wasted no time listening to. Lexaeus, Saix, Marluxia, Vexen, and Xaldin soon logged on too.

Marluxia typed: "I'm so sad. There are like no flowers on this campus.

Xaldin: Everywhere you go WON'T have flowers, Mar, get over it!

Vexen: It was too hot here, so I used a little iciness to cool the room down a bit. People keep asking why this room's air conditioned.

Lexaeus: So that's why it's so chilly...

Xaldin: Guys, I already got my lances confiscated.

Saix: By who?

Xaldin: Security. My roommate saw them sticking out of my bag and told on me.

Xigbar: I HATE this professor's voice! I'm getting ready to shoot him!

Luxord: Hey, Larxene, I'll bet you five munny that Xigbar'll have shot the professor by the end of class.

Larxene: You're on.

Xigbar: I can shoot you guys too, you know.

Larxene: Do it and I'll shove my knives in your gut.

Xemnas: Shouldn't you guys be paying attention to your classes?

Everyone other than Xemnas logged off immediately. Larxene and Luxord watched Xigbar stare in annoyance at the professor, who did indeed have an irritatingly squeaky voice.

"Now," the professor said, "in catching serial killers, the F.B.I. uses a system called profiling. Profiling breaks down the psychological pattern of a serial killer, specifying why certain killers do what they do. This can help an agent identify a killer or where/whom he will strike next."

"How 'bout using profiling to figure out what kind of serial killer I am," Xigbar muttered threateningly.

"Serial killers almost always have at least two of three specific traits. They are bed wetting, animal torturing, and setting things on fire."

The three Organization members looked at each other concernedly. Axel liked to light things on fire, Saix liked to torture snakes, and Marluxia often wet the bed. Basically, the thought that Organization Thirteen could, combined, become a group of serial killers unnerved them a little bit.

Luxord's cell phone vibrated. "Shit," he cursed quietly. He looked up, watching the professor carefully to make sure he did not see him. He pulled out his phone and ducked behind his laptop.

"What?" he whispered. After listening to the caller for another moment, his face lit up and he jumped up from his seat, yelling triumphantly, "I WON!"

The professor stopped speaking and the rest of the class stared at Luxord.

"Excuse me?" the professor asked dangerously.

"I won five thousand munny from a bet I made at a Gummi ship race!"

"And how exactly did you find this out?"

"Umm…" Luxord said guiltily, looking down at the phone in his hand. He lifted it up to his mouth and turned away from the professor, whispering, "I'll call you back after class." He hung up and shoved his phone in his pocket.

"If you do not plan to pay attention to my class, then please leave until you are ready to do so," the professor said sternly.

"I'm only in college because Xemnas made us go," Luxord said in irritation. "He wants us to get degrees or he'll turn us into Dusks, but I have no interest in college."

"I can see that. Well, you'll never get a degree if you don't pay attention to my lessons. So I suggest you do so or, like I said, leave."

"That's it," Xigbar said. He stood up and aimed one of his guns at the professor. He shot him in the nose and the professor started dancing around, yelling in agony and holding his bleeding face. Luxord and Larxene looked at him in exasperation and shook their heads wearily. "It was the way he said, 'leave'." Xigbar shrugged. "I couldn't take it anymore!"

Campus Security came running into the room, two of them helping the professor out and four of them charging at Xigbar, who grinned sheepishly. Security rushed him out of the room as well, saying, "You're going to see the Dean!"

Luxord turned to Larxene. "You owe me five munny," he stated baldly.

"You just won five thousand," Larxene said sourly as she pulled five munny out of her pocket and handed it to him.

"How much you wanna bet that Xemnas will shove one of his startlingly Star Wars-like glowing red swords up Xigbar's ass?"