Here is The Death and Life of Carlie Cullen, The Dark Defender., by your truly The Grinning Psychopath.
Carlie's point of view, for more or less the whole great journey. Starting from the top, and then dropping down to the bottom.
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Hope you enjoy. Don't forget to review. oh and i got note at the bottom, of which i hope you read, oh and i would also appreciate an Amen in your reviews. you'll see what i mean.
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Disclaiemer I OWN NOTHING!
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Carlie POV.
We assessed each other calmly, looking at each other's defenses, analyzing them, and looking the weakness, we saw none. we sighed and as one, we drew swords from the fabric of our minds, mine was a dark rapier, forged in the dark decadent deeps of decadence, despair, lonliness, hurt, anger, and determination. Her's was a rather simple looking steel rapier, made of logic, reason, precision and love.
"Pansy." I thought grinning, we circled each other, I bounced from foot to foot, as we did this. Excitement and eagerness filling me, from the adrenaline. I was ready and eager, and perfectly willing to do this. But I was also sad, inside where no one would ever see. Sad that it had down to this, a fight with the one I was created for and sworn to protect, and infinitely sorry to her for causing her pain myself.
But then determination and love filled me, love for Renesmee, and all she stood for, all her love, all her kindness, all her logic, her reason her innocence. And dterimination, to keep her safe, safe from all the infinitely worse hurts of the world, determination to help her see reason, to help her see that she was better off, so much safer, within my safe welcoming depths.
So I grinned at her, and struck out.
We came together in a flurry of flashing blades and stamping feet, both showing our teeth in smiles that had no true humor in them the fight was fast and furious.
Renesmee was all talent, precision, and skillful sweeps with her pale blade. I too possessed skill, and with I added strength, my determination my NEED to protect her, and most of all, I had my cool numbness, the sweet bitter saltiness that resided in my mouth, overwhelming all other tastes, so that I couldn't taste anything else other than blood. Blood sweet hot fiery, and invigorating, god I really could use some now.
Prevented me from feeling the pain of Renesmee's wounds, the wounds were large gashes, and ragged cuts all along her graceful frame, that bled profusely, she couldn't feel them, not yet, not with my influence keeping her numbed to them, keeping her absolutely blissfully unaware of the pain they would cause her,
And just to be sure she wouldn't notice the wounds, some tight seals, to keep them from appearing on her psychic body, to keep her from going any more insane than she already was.
Renesmee, as I expected kept her distance from me, not letting me get close enough to disable her, which also prevented her from running me through, she instead concentrated on whittling away me away, cutting and slicing at the my pale flesh, but through the use of my ability to hide things, and conceal pain, the wounds sealed themselves as fast as they were inflicted, preventing me from bleeding to death, and more slowly with my attention divided, healing themselves.
And the present as ever, cold bittersweet numbness, radiating from my center, my essence. Keeping me numb to every single slice that hacked across my flesh.
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Renesmee parried my blows with almost arrogant skill and ease, but i with all my decadent fiery energies, was slowly fueling my arms and legs, and my attacks were coming faster and stronger all the time. Almost inhumanly fast, sooner or later Renesmee was gonna fall. I knew it, she knew it, and she knew I knew it, but she held my ground anyway. she knew there was nowhere to go. her calm slightly nerdish mind assessed the situation logically.
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I parried every hack, every slash perfectly, knowing perfectly well how Renesmee thought, and how she would move, how she would act, for she w as me, and I was her, we were both two sides of the same coin, we knew each other perfectly, and were prepared.
Renesmee grinned suddenly, chose the time and angle her next blow carefully, and she fainted for my eyes, and I instinctively defended that vital spot, even though my brain screamed that it was a lure,
And then she struck down, right at my elbow, with a tremendous double-handed swing that drew admiring cries from the crowd of the lesser aspects of our minds. The severed arm fell to the floor, still clutching the sword.
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For a moment, no one moved.
I looked down at my severed arm, as the relaxing fingers let go of the swordhilt. A few drops of dark decadent blood fell from the stump of her arm, and then stopped. I looked at it thought full, my thoughts running faster than the flash on amphetamines. And then I laughed softly, a terribly sane and confident laugh. As I concentrated the full power of my Dark Demented energies to my arm, and four fingers and a thumb thrust out of the great wound at my elbow.
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A hand followed, and then the forearm, and in a minute I was whole again. I stooped down and picked up my sword, kicked aside the severed arm, and gestured for her to come at me again. She raised my sword, thinking hard.
This was going to be so easy, I thought, grinning. Taken over by the adrenaline, dopamine, and endorphins that surged in my body, in our body, till now I wasn't positive I could do that, but now that I had, now that I saw what so little of my energies could do, and saw also that there really was little end to my reserve of energy, thanks a lot to the number of years I'd had to grow and improve upon myself inside our head. And just as I developed my own mind, I had developed my power base, stretched out to reach the very pinnacle of dark energy made up of Renesmee's fear, her hurt, pain, fury, despair… lonliness.
And I saw now that I had indeed reached that peak, and that in the past few minutes, I'd barely used up three percent of that powerbase.
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I stepped forward, sword raised, eager to demonstrate just how much power I had.
But even as our swords reached out to touch again, there was a surge of more cold than I knew existed from the bracelet around our wrist, Edward appeared in our head.
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We stared at our Father shocked, and then felt the pendant in my physical hand, felt the part of my father that lay in it, saw that it was the force that powered him. I growled, Father glanced at me, then back at Renesmee and grinned, and I think he winked at her, smug arrogant bastard.
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I would have to curse mother later for leaving the bracelet thing with me, i'd felt its presence before, felt its power, but as long as we'd been separated from it, we'd been unable to tap into that power, but now with it in my grasp, we could tap into that power, and channel that piece of Edward out of it and into our mind, only Renesmee her having the wisdom and skill, and knowledge to back her up, had noticed it first, though it appeared to be subconscious. I swore mentally at myself, and at Renesmee, and readied my blade. And then I felt another surge of cold sweet velvet smooth energies, energies quite similar to my own infact, though they lacked the bitter tang, emit from the bracelet and suddenly there was another Edward, and then another, and an other, till there were dozens of them.
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One Edward an Edward dressed in Black Doc Martens, black Jeans, a black T-shirt, and a black frock coat, made some sort of hand gesture, And a psistorm of violent energies hit me from a dozen different directions at once.
One Edward grabbed the Sword and whisked it away, while six others did their best to tear me apart. And it took up a lot of my energies to keep them from succeeding.
Psychokinetic flames sprang up around me, burning so fiercely everyone else had to back away but again my energy was sufficient enough to keep the flames from even touching my delicate flesh, or the clothes on my body. And the Telepathic Edwards probed and picked at the locked doors of my mind but I'd had a lot of time to develop mental walls and shields, and locks against just this sorta thing, sure not exactly from the minds of 16 Edwards all at once, but the many, many large reserves of power I held so tightly to myself, more than made up for what the skill didn't cover. I stood my ground, the Decadent Energies of my mind rebuilding my body faster than it could be destroyed, and laughed.
I laughed for the ease at which I deflected and redirected their psychokinetic lashes, and the pyrokinetic bursts of fire, as well as the telepathic blasts of every single horrible thing imaginable, images of.. Well I don't really know, but I do know that whatever they are, they are pretty damn potent, one Edward I redirected the images at's head just fucking exploded, another cried blood ran around in circles like a chicken that just had its head torn off, I just broke down into high pitched little giggles at that.
And then after a long couple moments, the psistorm finally collapsed, and the Edwards lay shattered and exhausted, around me, and the last flames died away, and i was still standing there, untouched. I stopped laughing, and looked unhurriedly around myself. Thoughts of domination, my own demented form of altruism, and my future as emperor, or was it empress, I can't really recall at the moment "Everybody finished? Everybody had their turn? Good. Now that you all know I'm unstoppable, unkillable, and quite possibly immortal, who could be a more sensible choice as Emperess of this fine body of ours? You know in your hearts that I'm what you really need. What you deserve." I turned around slowly to face Renesmee and the Edward who'd ordered the attack, who now stood there beside me breathing heavily. I laughed confidently, feeling the usual warm indulgent sorta adoration I held for the man, and his long lovely features, and his tight ass "Now," I said, almost greedily. "Time to play..."
The Edward at my started forward, and I slapped him aside with one sweep of my arm, irritated then advanced on me, Renesmee stood there, Unmoving, unwilling to give into the despair that filled I knew filled her now, and I Grinned, drew yet another sword from the dark decadent depths of her mind And then Jacob's voice entered my head, Jacob! i felt a burning flash in my right hand, and both me and Renesmee Cried out in pain and then he Jacob black appeared out of nowhere, teleporting in to stand beside me, looking as beautiful and cocky as ever before. I glared at him. "What the hell are you doing here? Did L-Brian send you? I don't need any help, from you The Other. This is my business. Don't you dare interfere." I snapped, wary o f Jacob, he'd caused us so much pain, so much despair with his death, he'd hurt us, made us cry, made us weep, he'd made Renesmee go through so much hell, so much pain, so much darkness, she had to create me, just to dump all emotions on me at once, before I'd even had a chance develop the numbness, that dominated over all my senses of pain, physical and mental. Something of which I should hate her for I suppose, but I don't I hated him, and Edward, and all the rest of clan Cullen, for that!
Jacob ignored me, much to my irritation, looking straight at Renesmee, obviously love struck… shame I'd have to kill him, he really did have a nice smile, had those cute little dimples, plus his eyes were dark, green and lovely, though just a little too dark for my tastes, they reminded me of my own, when I looked in a mirror "Hey there Renesmee." he said softly staring at her. she stared at him opened mouthed, "Jacob," she croaked her voice barely above a whisper, "Wha- What are you doing here?" she asked my voice dry and husky. he grinned, "Oh i was just in the neighborhood, and figured i'd drop by see how you were doing, when i saw this," he gestured towards me and she glared even harder at him, "Abomination, figures really, i step out for two minutes and everything goes to hell in a handbasket."
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Abomination! Oh I was so gonna kill this bastard, he may have pretty face, and a nice smile, but he was far too cocky and arrogant for my tastes, call me an abomination will he, well I'd show him an abomination, I'd show it to him excruciating detail, and feeling.
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Renesmee stared at him, him like he was both the second coming of Christ, and the Devil brought forth from to the land of the living. I felt her pain and her sorrow, at seeing him rise up in her, and immediately sealed that area of emotion, keeping her from knowing just how much the Mutt's presence in our head affected us. I heard her clear her throat, "Uhmm, Jacob i don't know if your aware of this but... your dead, and have been for over three years!" he waved her off, "Ahh yes i know, but to me its only been about 4 minutes, sorry being dead really scrambles your sense of time. but anyway, its nice seeing you and talking to you again Renesmee, and i'm sorry it couldn't be under more happier circumstances."
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He shot me a meaningful look. and I gave him the bird, I really wanted to kill him now, but I was curious, was there a chance that he could undo some of this hurt he'd also caused? If there was it'd mean I could keep my attention far less diverted, more in control, so that I could perform my duty to Renesmee, with even more diligence and skill, for while I was capable of hiding wounds behind permanent seals, of numbness. The wounds inflicted upon her psychi by Jacob's Death were… memorable, and it took everything I had in me, to prevent her from feeling the full extent of the hurt.
"But anyway i got job here to finish Renesmee, i'm sorry you and i couldn't be together, like we wanted to, and uhmm.. well i'm particuarly sorry that my death caused this to happen to you, but what's done is done, time can't be wre-written, and now i just have to take care of this one little detail."
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And with that Jacob Turned, to the now fuming me, and gave me an unpleasant smile, I snarled and got ready for whatever attack came, my mental shields were up, my body was in prime condition, I was ready.
"Hello Carlie, nice to finally meet you, and your sorry unpleasant skank ass, you've been causing a lot of trouble for my imprint, and its time to pay the piper. Enjoy your time in Hell."
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I Opened her mouth to say something sharp and cutting, and not to mention witty
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But then with those words, a force rose up, and lashed out at me, and it wasn't from outside like I'd been ready for, but from inside of me, deep, at the heart of me, I felt hot vibrant energy inside of me, bright shining, and glorious.
I felt his might inside of me, felt how much love he held for me… but at the same time it wasn't me, but for Renesmee, but it wasn't of her either, it was for me, it… FUCK! I- he- his!
And then pain beyond all imagining ripped through me, as the numbness I'd felt practically since the day I was created, was ripped from me. And I felt so much, I felt the air in my lung, felt the ground beneath my feet, felt the endorphins in my system unhindered by whatever freezingly cold numbing hell I'd been in the past three and a half years.
And then I felt my powerbase dissolving, felt all that mighty energy collapsing around me, as Jacob Black slowly began shutting down the particles of dark energy within my body. At first I felt orgasmic ally grateful for him giving me this gift, this ability to finally feel how great it was to not be numb to the world, to not feel as though I were encased in a block of dark demented ice.
And then I felt panick, panick beyond all imagining as I remembered all those seals, all those memories, all that pain. And I slowly realized what would happen when Jacob shut every last bit of my dark, essence down.
My seals would unravel themselves, burst open, and the purest rawest forms of Despair anger lonliness pain and… everything I'd kept Renesmee from completely feeling the past three years, everything that had made me, would rush back into her, and before she even knew it, she'd end up just as fucked up and insane as I was.
I realized what I had to do, before the panic had even really set in.
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Using every last scrap of my immense energy, ripping away every last seal I still held over the few cuts Renesmee had inflicted upon my body, I'd yet to heal. I drew all the pain in Renesmee's body deep, deep into my heart, drew all those deep horrible gouges and cuts away from her, and to me.
Dark and insane, and bitchy, not to mention skanky, and whorish, I may be, but two things, two objectives really, that were constant redeeming factors in my mind, one thing that kept me above people like Victoria, and Aro, and the rest of his Volturi. my Love and the need protect Renesmee C. Cullen.
And by golly, I would defend her, I would fight back all the demons in hell for her, it didn't matter if my feelings on how defending her was best, often differed from those of other people, I would Defend her if it was the last thing I did… and it was.
Every last single insane decadent particle of chaotic demented energy in my body shut itself down as I used them all up to defend my mistress, my queen, my empress, my mother… my love. All my wounds burst open at once, and the wounds of Renesmee's heart were added to them all at once, as well all the gouges and cuts all the pain. and I Carlie Cullen fell… screaming to the bloodied floor, as much in shock as in pain.
I'd been so close to winning everything... In moments I was soaked in my own thick black decadent blood, as I writhed helplessly at the feet of those I'd wanted so much to see crawling before her. I tried to lift my sword, to strike one last blow for spite's sake, at Jacob Black, who had forced me into the position knowing I'd defend Renesmee before letting the hurt he'd inflicted upon her in the first place, take her, but there was no strength left in her. I bled to death, and no one made any move to save me.
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But then I didn't die, not right away.
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I thought of all the wounds that covered my body, thought of all the sacrifices I'd made to protect Renesmee from this, this pain, this agony! So I thought of how lucky she was, that she wouldn't have to feel this, how she wouldn't have to feel this for a while, to come.
My little act of heroism, courageous and foxy, and not to mention heroic and spunky as all hell, though it may be. Was only a temporary, sure it might take time, maybe a year, maybe external years, maybe even a decade or two. But still, it would come, all that pain, all that madness, all that sorrow, it would come, but slowly, it would creep in her, and hopefully, it wouldn't overwhelm her… not like it did before, I hope.
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Okayy, TO BE CONTINUED!
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there is a Light at the end of the tunnel people! now i just need to figure out if its sunlight, or an oncoming train, or a flame thrower, or just a bunch of flames... personally if it aint sunlight, i'm gonna hope for a train, that'll be quick, messy but quick, and hopefully not too painful. which is more than can be said for poor Carlie here. sniffle. Review please.
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WARNING PRAYER ABOUT TO BE HELD HERE.
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Come now Join me in prayer brothers! as Dearest Carlie's soul is condemned to the darkest deepest depths of hell.
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Dear unholy lord Valentine, please we beg of you now, please impart a few of your dark unholy and addictive substances to her, to ease the pain of her dark and chaotic stay, in there, till her sins have been washed of her soul, and she has been restored to her place as the Dark Defender of Renesmee Cullen, so that Renesmee may take truly take on her place as the big C in the middle of Renesmee, and Cullen.
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And now CAN I GET AN AMEN! whats that? i can't HEAR YOUUUU! AMEN! I can't here you AMENN! Whats THAT! i think i just had a ghost whisper into my ear LOUDER YOU SOBER SONS A BITCHES LOUDER! LET YOUR INSANITY TAAKE HOLD! NWO CAN I GET AN AME-
