They say that time's supposed to heal ya, but I ain't done much healing
Emma's phone rang as she lied on her bed. She thought about moving to silence it so its annoying tone would stop, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. It stopped a minute later.
"You have to help me, Swan. Take it!"
"I can't," she cried. "It should be me." God it should've been her, it should've been her.
"Your family needs you. If anyone deserves to go to the Underworld, it's me." No, no he didn't. Heroes don't belong in the Underworld. "You were right; I was weak. So let me make up for it now by being strong."
"I don't want to lose you." She needed him, her True Love, needed to live their lives together.
"I don't want to lose you. But you have to let me go. Let me die a hero. That's the man I want you to remember, please!"
She took Excalibur, hands shaking in fear and from the Darkness. She declared, "I love you." He couldn't leave her without knowing how much she cared for him. He always thought he loved her more. How could he think that?
She moved forward, giving him one final kiss. She begged her body to remember him—his lips, his hands, the way his hair always brushed against her forehead as they kissed. They pulled away from each other. Emma braced herself for what she had to do.
"I love you too." He gave her a pain-filled smile. "It's okay," he insisted, staring at her with love and pain in his eyes. Her sight was nearly blinded with tears. This couldn't be happening. This was supposed to be her burden. She was supposed to the one to die, to take the Darkness from this world to the next. How could things have changed so quickly?
She summoned all of her courage and thrust the sword forward through Killian's torso. He let out a cry of pain. She held onto him as his life slowly left his body. He used the last of his strength to put his hands on her face, to look at her one last time.
Light surged from Emma as the Dark One disappeared and the Savior was reborn. She pulled Excalibur from Killian. The sword fell apart in her hands as the Darkness was vanquished.
She turned back to Killian. His neck wound had reappeared. The two reached for each other, Emma covering the wound and Killian putting one hand on her neck. Emma held him as he collapsed.
Everything after that was a blur for her. There were so many tears. She remembered staying with Killian as long as possible, until the coroners wheeled him away, forcing Emma to let go of his hand. Her mother holding her as she cried. Her father standing behind her with one hand on her arm.
That night played in her head over and over again. How was she supposed to move on? The love of her life was dead. She would never hold him again, hear his voice…
She sat up suddenly, grabbing her phone. She went to Killian's contact profile. She hesitated looking at his ID photo. It had been taken during one of their quiet moments. They had been eating breakfast at Granny's and she snapped a picture of him while syrup dripped down his chin. It hurt to look at.
She tapped his number. It rang four times before heading to voicemail. "You've reached Killian… Swan, are you sure I'm doing this right? Surely they know who they're calling." There were shifting noises and Emma's laugh in the distance on the recording. "It's not as easy as it looks! Damn it, Swan, just help m—" It cut off, and the beep went off.
She hadn't planned to say anything, but words poured out anyway. "Hello. I know you can't hear me," she began. Her voice was shaking. "But, um…I just wanted to hear your voice. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry, Killian." She stayed on the line in silence, waiting until something finally prompted her to press 'end.'
Eventually she dropped it and lay back down on her bed.
I've forgotten how it felt before the world fell at our feet
"I told you I'd take you to see the world someday," Emma commented, watching Killian stare at the ground from the top of the Empire State Building. She snapped a picture while he was distracted.
"Technically, I've already been to New York, lass." Killian gave her a pointed yet teasing look. "More than once."
She got closer to him. He threw his left arm over her shoulder. She said, "I know you've technically been here before, but you've never seen all the sites. Don't even pretend that Times Square at night wasn't fascinating to you."
"That was terrifying, Swan! Crowds of people pressing in on you at all moments, lights flashing in your face, a capitalist's dream comes true…" She glared. "Okay, it was pretty, if a little smelly."
"Well, fear not. Our next stop is Europe. We're going to Paris and Italy and Pompeii. You'll love those. They all have classical architecture and gorgeous statues and monuments, I know you'll have a good time."
"Swan, I will have a good time anywhere as long as it's with you." He leaned in for a kiss. It was the best kind, the one with their teeth smacking lightly from smiling too much. The kind she wanted for the rest of her life.
Abruptly, the scene changed. Emma had Excalibur once more, and it was stabbed into Killian's torso. She yanked the sword out and held onto him. "Not again, not again, not again," she repeated.
The floor began to dissolve out from under them. Emma tried to hang onto Killian as it crumbled around him, but his hand slipped from hers, and he fell into the black abyss.
She woke up screaming.
I must've called a thousand times to tell you I'm sorry
A few days later, Emma put a visual and auditory glamour on herself. The two times she'd been forced into public since Killian passed, all she saw were the sympathy stares and got awkward pity apologies (Henry and her parents insisted it would go away soon—she didn't believe them). She didn't need any of that or any distractions this time.
She left the house through the back door, just in case. It was the first time she'd used her light magic since it was returned to her.
She carefully stayed away from busy places, carefully weaving through Storybrooke until she reached the graveyard.
His was the only new one. The last death before Killian was Neal, and that grave was small. Killian's was the largest gravestone, second only to the mausoleum for Regina's father.
Killian Jones
Emma had opted for no words on the gravestone. Nothing could summarize him the way he deserved. He was too much to be shoved into a few words.
She kneeled carefully directly in front of the tombstone. She pulled her phone out and dialed Killian's number and waited until the message tone beeped.
"Hey," she began, making herself comfortable. She would be there awhile. "It feels like forever since I was here for the funeral. I don't know what it's like for you down there, but time is passing slowly for me. I haven't done much but sit around. I know you want me to move on and live, but I don't think I'm quite ready yet. Not without you." She fiddled with the fake grass and decided to change the subject.
"I'm not sure how everyone else is coping. I mostly get brief updates from everyone. Henry has been staying with Regina. Sometimes he goes to Mom and Dad's since the Green Bean baby is too young to be sleeping through the night yet—oh, that's another thing. Green Bean doesn't have a real name yet. Um, Regina got some temp to help my dad co-sheriff while I'm, uh…taking some time. I haven't asked who it is. I don't really care. I don't care about anything."
She went silent. She mindlessly traced along the lettering of his name.
Awhile later, she found herself lying down on the fake grass; her head was curled near the stone, and fell asleep.
Emma found herself standing in a stone room, standing next to her mother.
"You ready?" Snow asked, grabbing her daughter's hand.
Emma nodded and took the bouquet of pink roses from her handmaiden. "I'm ready. Let's do this." She smoothed out the skirts of her dress. Snow readjusted the flower crown on her head.
Charming stepped up next to her, holding his arm out for her. Emma wrapped her arm in his, doing the same with Snow on the other side, and waited.
The doors in front of her opened, revealing the Great Hall before them. It was packed with their loved ones from all over the realm. Henry, Regina, Robin, Granny, and Ruby all sat in the first row, as family. Killian stood tall at the end of the aisle, looking stunning in his blue vest and long black coat.
Emma and her parents walked up the aisle, smiling at all the people that had come to witness this milestone. She kissed her parents on the cheeks as they reached the end. She stepped up in front of Killian.
"It's okay," Killian said, a pained look on his face.
"What?" Her smile fell as Killian's torso went bloody. He collapsed, his arms reaching for Emma as he went. She rushed down to him, clutching his arms tightly. "No! Come back to me! You can't leave me again!"
"It's okay," he repeated. The ground began dissolving.
She gripped his arms violently, clinging to him desperately. "No! I am not leaving you to die. I'm going with you." The world around the two fell away. Emma didn't let go.
It's no secret that the both of us are running out of time
Emma shot up from the ground panting. It had fallen dark while she slept. Her nightmare was burned into her mind. All of her dreams had been about losing Killian; that was completely normal. However, that was the first time she held onto him as he fell. She'd let go every other time.
That was when she decided she couldn't let go in real life either. She refused to accept that her True Love was gone forever. Her father had died before too, for the Dark Curse, and her mother had brought him back because she believed in their love.
She would do the same exact thing.
She was going to the Underworld.
