A/N: This is a one shot for the "I was laughing too loud in La Push" one-shot contest on the two sides of twilight forum. (That forum has now been deleted.)

This is set during Eclipse. There aren't any threats from Victoria or her army of newborns. I know the treaty doesn't exactly get withdrawn, but just for this one shot, imagine that it has.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I just love to make Jasper mess with people's emotions for his own pleasure.


You Want to Bet On That?

Jasper POV

"I'm bored!" Emmett exclaimed, throwing his head back against the couch. After a second, he huffed to exaggerate his point. The only problem with being an empathetic, was that if someone was feeling irritated, I was feeling irritated, and right now, I, too, was bored.

"Can it, Emmett. You're killing my mood," I told him quietly, knowing he could hear me loud and clear.

"I thought that was your job?" he shot back and then, as if his comment had been the funniest thing he'd ever come out with, he started to laugh exuberantly. I didn't find his comment amusing in the slightest, yet I still chuckled.

Damn it.

"I'm still bored."

I glowered at him from across the room, wishing I could have some peace and quiet. Emmett was the only one from our family that couldn't be left alone in the house. I preferred it, the tranquillity, but to Emmett, the concept of an empty house meant he had the free will to do as he pleased. Causing havoc was something he was very familiar with when he had nothing else to do; like now, for instance.

So I had to play babysitter to my 'little' brother, and I hated it. I was certain my dislike for the situation was being enthused by the fact Emmett had been having a rather loud, but private moment outside with Rosalie. Instead of asking, Alice, Edward and I to vacate the room while he came in to retrieve some clothing, he'd decided to run straight through the middle of us. To say we'd already seen numerous parts of our brother we'd rather not prior to that day was beside the point.

Carlisle and Esme were currently on Isle Esme, and weren't going to be back for another week. Rosalie and Alice were off on a 'girls only' hunt, and Edward was cooped up on some river bank with Bella's father, Charlie.

I'd felt Edward's reluctance a mile away the day he came home and announced that Charlie had asked him to go fishing with him. Charlie had described it as a bonding session, and that it was important, considering they were 'practically family' now that he and Bella were engaged.

Within a second, Emmett's boredom seemed to triple in strength in a matter of seconds, and I grimaced as I tried to mask his emotions with a wave of calm. It didn't work, and a moment later, the feeling seemed to intensify once more.

I sighed to myself, and turned to gaze out the window at the pouring rain. A slight chuckle escaped my lips as I pictured Charlie and Edward sharing an umbrella.

"Is something funny?" Emmett demanded. His tone was sour; as if he wasn't pleased I hadn't already shared the joke with him.

The corners of my mouth twitched into a smile at his obvious annoyance. "I'm just picturin' Edward and Charlie gettin' cosy underneath an umbrella."

The couch Emmett was sitting on shook with his laughter. As I was watching him display his obvious hilarity, an idea came to mind that would allow us to pass the time until our significant others returned.

"Emmett," I began, using a certain tone of voice that told him I was about to propose something that would interest him. "How about we make a little bet to pass the time?"

He sat up immediately as a grin formed on his face. There was a mischievous twinkle in his eye, something I'd grown to be very accustomed to. I smirked cunningly, knowing he wouldn't need any encouragement. His excitement was fuelling the idea I had, to a point where I actually wanted to carry it out.

"Name it, brother."

"I bet you can't go a full hour without laughin'."f

He snorted and raised an eyebrow at me. I could feel the smug, overconfident aura oozing out of him already.

"What are the stakes?"

I thought for a moment, knowing they had to be good.

"You can choose my punishment if you win," I replied, knowing already that it wouldn't be necessary. "But, if I win, you have to walk in on Esme and Carlisle while they are being intimate with one another."

A small amount of confidence disappeared from his expression.

"You want me to walk in on Esme and Carlisle?" he cried, shaking his head. "Dude, I can't do that!"

"Rules are rules, Emmett, you know that. If you lose the bet, you have to," I told him in a matter of fact voice. "Maybe it'll teach you a lesson at the same time."

He laughed, mocking me. "As if Carlisle and Esme will be able to teach me anything new. I know everything there is to know about s-"

I cut him off before he could finish.

"I do not mean it in that sense, Emmett," I said, rolling my eyes at his lack of propriety. "What I meant was, maybe it would make you think twice about where you and Rosalie decide to get intimate next time. I think we've all had the experience of seeing things about you that we really didn't want to. Now you'll be on the receiving end."

He growled at me in disgust. "If you win, that is."

"Oh, brother, I will win," I replied, then held my hand up before he could retort. "Now, keep quiet while I think about where I'm goin' to stage this little bet of ours."

My first thought was to find Edward and cause some mischief. But I knew that if we did, first, Emmett would breakdown into laughter at the first chance he got. Teasing Edward was a favourite pastime for him, and paired with my ability, Emmett wouldn't last a second.

But not only that, I knew Alice would be furious at the both of us for ruining their 'moment', and I hated to even sport the idea of infuriating her. Second, Edward would kill us both, and third, well, by that point, we'd be a smouldering pile of ash, so it wouldn't matter.

So I pushed that idea from my mind. Where could we go?

A devious grin formed on my face as I thought of the perfect setting. La Push. The treaty with the Quileute's seemed to be a moot point these days. The wolves were allowed on our land as long as they didn't cause trouble, and vice versa for us on theirs.

"I've got just the place," I told him, watching as his eyes lit up at the words. "La Push."

Emmett stood up, throwing his hands up in the air. "LA PUSH, BABY!"

"Never ever say that again in my presence," I replied, shaking my head as he pretended to sulk. I laughed at his expression for no apparent reason, just in an attempt to mock him because he could not laugh himself.

"Laugh it up, brother. It's the only laughing you're gonna hear in the next hour."

"That's what you think," I muttered as we made our way out the door.

La Push reeked of wet dog. But the rain seemed to dilute the stench, and I w


as glad to be standing out in it during daytime. Usually we preferred not to stand for long periods of time in this kind of weather. To humans, it attracted their attention when they noticed we were not seeking any kind of shelter.

But right now, that wasn't an issue.

Emmett and I were drenched through to our skin, even though it wasn't raining as heavily here in La Push. The weather didn't affect us, though. We could stand in it for days and we would be exactly the same as before. Wet clothes were just…irritating. But if my plan was to work, rain was exactly what I needed.

A short while later, we heard laughing coming from the other side of the trees. They couldn't see us, and hopefully they wouldn't be able to smell us, either. It was three of the wolves. One I recognised as Jacob Black, but I hadn't seen the other two before.

We both wrinkled our noses as they passed. We were going to wait until they were further away before we moved again, but then an idea came into my mind. What if we...but before I could plan out the rest of my strategy, my cell phone buzzed. I retrieved it from my pocket and shook my head in amusement when I saw that was Alice calling.

"Don't you dare, Jasper Whitlock, don't you even dare," she told me as soon as I put the phone to my ear. "If you want to start a massive war with the Quileutes then go ahead. But I really wouldn't if I were you."

I sighed and changed my mind, knowing she'd 'see' it. "Thank you, Jas. Now stop pestering the dogs and go do something else. I'd suggest the beach."

"Thank you, ma'am," I murmured, drawling slightly. She giggled into the hand piece, making me smile at the sound of it. We both said goodbye soon after, and once the call had ended, I placed the phone back in my pocket and looked around to make sure the wolves weren't lurking around.

"I'm even more bored than before. Are you actually planning on doing something? Or is your pansy empathetic ass too scared about what I'm going to make you do when I win?"

Emmett sneered at me jokingly as he finished. I didn't reply verbally, not dignifying his insult with a response. Instead, I shoved him into a tree and walked away. The bark smashed on impact, leaving a dent in the wood.

"Idiot," Emmett grumbled, as he caught up with me seconds later, still brushing the remnants from his shirt. "So, where are we going, then?"

"To the beach," I told him, and then silenced him with my hand when he tried to ask something else.

We smelt them before we heard them, and heard them before we saw them. I recognised the voices immediately. They were some of Bella's friends from school. One voice in particular caught my attention.

Mike Newton.

Edward had a strong dislike for the guy ever since he tried asking Bella out when she first arrived in Forks. I knew Edward wouldn't have a problem with what I had planned. In fact, he'd probably be helping us right now if he wasn't with Charlie. Not only would he have gotten back at Mike Newton, he'd also have gotten back at Emmett.

As we peeked through the trees, we saw a group of six or seven sitting around a camp fire. They were all eating something that smelt of cooked meat. Unlike earlier, it wasn't raining on the beach, and that allowed them to keep the fire going.

I focused in on Mike Newton, and channelled as much paranoia as I could into his small mind. I watched as he twitched, and started to look around nervously. I mixed in a tiny amount of fear, and once again watched as he looked around, eyeing the trees as if something was about to jump out.

"G-Guys...there's something out there," Mike stuttered, as he latched onto the girl sitting next to him. A felt a small amount of fear emanate out of the group as Mike continued to look around.

"You're such a girl, Newton," one of the larger guys murmured, laughing at his own comment. "There isn't anything out there."

Mike's emotions changed to anger and embarrassment. "Shut up, Crowley, you were talking about those bears they were hunting just as much as anyone was."

"I heard they were wolves," one of the girls, Lauren commented, looking around at the group.

"Yeah, well that was months ago now," Crowley shot back, chuckling with the spotty guy next to him when Mike crossed his arms in front of him petulantly.

I bent down, picking up on of the larger rocks and threw it into the trees where Mike had been looking earlier.

"Nice one," Emmett commended, making his enjoyment of the little show I was putting on evident.

Mike jumped and stared at the trees, his eyes wide with fear. "D-did you just see that?" he asked, nudging the same girl he'd latched onto earlier.

I didn't wait for her response as I let out one of the scariest, deepest growls I could muster. Mike sprang to his feet, looking around as his head rapidly flicked from side to side.

At the same time, somewhere in the distance a wolf howled, as if it was in on the joke, too. I glanced at Emmett, who was biting his lip, trying not to laugh. I smiled, knowing he was going to break any second now.

I turned back to Mike who was still had a look of abject fear spread across his face. I sent one last, fear filled wave of emotions at him and watched as he screamed like a little girl, and started running as fast as he could up the hill towards where the cars were parked.

My eyes zeroed in on the wet mud just as Mike ran over it. His feet lost their footing and suddenly he was on his back, sliding back down the hill.

Emmett, who had been giving off short waves of enjoyment, suddenly broke down and started roaring with laughter. The sound of it echoed off the cliffs. I wasn't sure what it sounded like to human ears, but as soon as Mike heard it, he was off his back and crawling on hands and knees up the hill. By this point, mud had completely covered him head to toe.

"Jas, you win, you win!" Emmett exclaimed between laughs. "That is one of the funniest things I've ever seen you do!"

I smiled victoriously and watched as Mike finally disappeared over the hill. Seconds later, we both heard him scrambling for the keys to his car.

"What the hell is that noise?" Crowley asked as he looked in our general direction. I felt a wave of curiosity emanate from him, and I knew it was about time we evacuated the scene of the 'crime'.

"That's our cue to leave," I informed Emmett, who was still laughing uncontrollably. I sent a wave of calmness towards him, trying to encourage some kind of composure. Once he was under control, I pulled him back through the trees away from the beach.

As soon as we were far enough away, we started sprinting back towards our house. As we neared our destination, I was instantly hit by anger that could only belong to one Rosalie Lillian Hale.

"Emmett! What the hell were you doing in La Push?" she demanded as soon as we came into sight. Alice was skipping behind her, chortling quietly to herself. Ignoring Rosalie, I focused on my wife, instead. "Are you honestly trying to get the treaty reinstated?"

"I'm sorry," Emmett mumbled, looking sheepish. "We had a bet..."

I silenced him with a glare. He was digging himself a hole, a very big hole.

"What were you doing? I heard you from here!"

He glanced at me quickly, and then shrugged as he turned back to Rosalie. "I was laughing too loud in La Push."

She glared at him, stepping forward and slapped him across the back of his head. "You complete idiot."

Nevertheless, she was smiling as she moved away again.

I glided over to me, linking her arm in my own. I smiled down at her, kissing her on the forehead quickly before turning to Emmett.

"Now that that has been cleared up," I began, trying to hide the joy I felt regarding what I had to say next. "I think you have some payback to fulfil."

Emmett suddenly looked paler than normal, which, for a vampire, looked quite sickly. It obviously hadn't occurred to him that said payback wouldn't happen at least for another week. Unless he went to Isle Esme...

For a moment, that notion felt so very appealing, but before I could voice it, my wife spoke up.

"Don't worry, Emmett. I'll let you know when to walk in!" Alice told him, winking at Rosalie as she said it. Rosalie grinned at her, giving me the impression that she approved of the penalty Emmett had to carry out.

Laughter filled the air as we all walked back towards the house. But for once, Emmett wasn't amused.


A/N: If you liked it, let me know. Sorry to those of you who are on Team Mike Newton, but he's such an easy target.