Summary:
Alistair wants to give a special gift to his wife as a name-day present. He knows that she has secretly held a flame for her first love and his longtime friend, Cullen for years. It turns into gifts all around when Alistair asks for his best friend's aid in making Lana's name-day celebration one to remember.
**This is a re-edited version of the original one chapter story, extended to fill seven chapters. I will be adding onto this story soon, so stay tuned!**
Notes:
Disclaimer:
M for Sexual Content, totally NSFW (please don't get fired over me)
All recognizable content belongs to Bioware/EA Games,
though they all have my heart, only Lana truly belongs to me.
But I'm willing to share.
The Gift
Chapter 1
Cullen's Office Pt. 1
Location: Skyhold
Cullen was sitting at his desk, working on the never-ending pile of reports when he heard a tentative knock on his door.
"Enter" he said, barely looking up from his work and not registering who had just walked into his office.
"What is it?" He inquired of his unknown visitor.
The newcomer cleared his throat and said, "So very, very serious Cullen. It looks like you've worked yourself through dinner yet again. You might want to be careful, someone might mistake you for a stuffy commander of something important."
Groaning, the Commander raised his head and looked around the room. Night had certainly fallen, his one lone candle barely putting off enough light to work by. How had that happened? Again! He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, then chuckled at his old friend who was carrying a large tray of various cheeses, bread and what looked like his favorite Antivan brandy.
Clearing a space on his desk, Cullen admitted ruefully, "It appears, you've come to my rescue once again, Alistair. I already have enough trouble sleeping, forgetting to eat as well does not help the Inquisition any. Whatever would I do without you?" He teased, then rose from his chair and lit the evening candles around the room.
Alistair deposited the tray on the desk, then struck a pose with his fists planted firmly on his hips, elbows out and his chin held high. He grinned while raising a single eyebrow, "That's me! The ever-doting hero! Swooping in to save the day with a fine array of cheeses!" He gestured to the tray with a flourish and a bow.
"Yes well… rumor has it that swooping… is bad." Cullen chuckled at his friend's old joke. "And you are lots of things, but 'bad' isn't one of them. Though I have tried many times to corrupt you. You should really let me help you fix that. Being a little 'naughty' now and then might serve you well." Cullen gave him his crooked grin while winking at him.
Alistair groaned inwardly. It was an old jest, as comfortable as their friendship had become over the years. The flirting was almost automatic for Cullen, a mask of sorts, to cover his own insecurities and doubts. Alistair's blushing, as predictable as the rising sun. And Cullen thought frequently to himself, incredibly adorable.
"Speaking of heroes, how is that lovely wife of yours? Her new title, 'High Constable' has kind of an ominous weight to it. Though if anyone could wear such a heavy mantle, it's your Solana. She has borne her, 'Hero of Ferelden' with grace and dignity well for all these years after all." Cullen spoke fondly of the now infamous mage.
"No heavier than, Commander of the Inquisition's Forces or Knight-Commander." Alistair chuckled.
Cullen added, "Or your daunting, Commander of the Grey? I trust that's not just referring to the flecks of white that are starting to appear in those striking red locks of yours." He winked at his friend only one year older than himself.
"Oh ha-ha, yours is just harder to see in your lighter and infinitely more unruly hair." Alistair pantomimed running his fingers through his hair with an over dramatic flip of his head to keep it out of his eyes.
Laughing, Cullen grabbed a bite of cheese and threw it at his old friend who snatched it out of the air and popped it into his mouth, "Hey don't waste that! Crackers fine, but never the cheese."
Sitting down across from his old friend, he finished chewing before continuing, "We sure have come a long way since our wayward days in the chantry haven't we? Nicking food from the larder and hiding out in the loft to avoid our duties. Now look at us. Two aging Commanders and a High Constable. What is that anyway? I'm not even sure what that job entails." He pondered aloud.
"She's your boss." Cullen stated simply.
"That she is. Has been since the day I met her." Alistair chuckled fondly.
"You've been a Warden longer than she has, why is it that you don't outrank her again?" Cullen teased.
"Oh please, you've met her. I daresay, you've known her longer than I have. When our dear Solana takes control of a situation, everyone obeys. Even shy chantry boys can't say no when sweet little Lana wants something from them eh?" Alistair winked at his oldest friend. The brief history of Cullen and Lana was open knowledge and though Cullen had long since accepted that his two dearest friends were destined to be together, Alistair still found it amusing to bring up the shyness of Cullen's youth and that single kiss shared between he and Lana.
Blushing lightly, Cullen took his friend's ribbing in stride as he poured their drinks.
Alistair continued to fill the air, "Regardless of titles, Lana is still just Lana, gathering loyal misfits and either inspiring or dominating people wherever she goes. Sometimes, a bit of both." He winked again at Cullen. Reaching for another bit of cheese, Alistair sat back to savor the flavor while his mind wandered off to join his beloved.
Cullen set the glass of brandy before his friend currently lost in thought, then settled in to enjoy his late repast letting his own mind wander. His heart twinged whenever he thought of Alistair's beautiful wife. But he couldn't be anything but happy for her. No one else would have been worthy of his first love's attention; except his only boyhood friend.
He'd missed his chance for her affections, too shy back when they were in the Circle together to do more than observe her. Too attached to his duty to admit his feelings, until the day of her Harrowing. She took the reins then, as Alistair enjoyed teasing him about. One moment of weakness, a stolen kiss that he still cherished in his fading memories. Before he could begin to hope for anything more, circumstances ripped her from him and placed her into Alistair's arms. It was for the best, he told himself.
When the Circle fell and he next saw her, he was so broken, not deserving of her attention let alone her affections. And though he'd been jealous to learn she was with Alistair, he knew that had she stayed in the circle, her fate would most likely have been the same as the other mages that didn't survive.
This was better.
Alistair was a good man; handsome, kind, and completely devoted to her. He would take care of her as she deserved to be cared for. They made each other happy and that was truly all that mattered to Cullen.
His own happiness always came second to his duty. Cullen couldn't remember not being driven to better himself for his work. Though Alistair used to lead him into trouble back in their youth, he always resorted back to the comfort of duty. There was ever something more that needed to be done, other things that required his attention, constant distractions.
He'd taken care of his personal 'needs', sure. There was a bit of experimenting back at the Chantry. Alistair never seemed interested in returning his affections, though he never openly rebuked his flirting either. There were others, however, just as interested in exploring the pleasures of their bodies. That's all they ever were; physical dalliances.
After that, he was at the circle where he met Solana. His focus at the time was always on the task at hand, his personal desires set aside. Well, almost always. He began to find that his eyes would follow a certain young apprentice as she went about her daily tasks. He'd conveniently find reasons to be in areas where she would be studying, requesting extra guard duties as an excuse to be there should she need assistance. He would look for reasons to talk to her, but was completely content to just be near.
It wasn't until that fateful day of her Harrowing, that he finally admitted to himself that he cared for her. He'd been ordered to be the Templar to strike the killing blow should she fail her test. His heart ached at the prospect of having to carry out that order. He prayed to Andraste that he wouldn't have too. He also prayed for the courage to stay strong and true to his vows in the wake of the unthinkable happening.
So relieved was he that she was strong enough to succeed, that he allowed himself one brief moment of weakness. To be lured away from his post for a stolen moment together. She seemed just as relieved as he was, their kiss more than a comfort to them both. Then she was gone and he had to relearn how to focus without her.
When his duties landed him in Kirkwall, he would sate his desires at the Blooming Rose, as many Templars did. His visits were once again based purely on need alone, male or female, depending on his mood. But happiness was something that was tucked safely away back in the circle, with that single kiss.
Breaking the comfortable silence that blanketed the room, Cullen admitted, "I was sorry to hear that she wouldn't be accompanying you this visit, I trust her travels are proving fruitful?"
Alistair smiled, "I received a missive from her just this morning actually. It seems she has found something potentially useful to our cause, but it's going to take some more research before she fully knows its true value. She has requested the use of the Inquisition's library and plans on joining us here before the next moon waxes full."
Cullen took the news in stride, nodding somberly, his face not betraying the excitement in his heart knowing that he would get to see her again soon. He took a long pull from his brandy to help school that excitement.
Alistair watched his friend closely as he shared the news from her letter. Watched for that little spark that he knew would light his eyes before he got it under control. His wife's scheduled arrival would almost perfectly align with the anniversary of her birth and he wanted to plan something particularly special to celebrate the occasion.
He knew that Lana still held a flame for Cullen and the spark in Cullen's eye whenever she was mentioned convinced him that the feeling was mutual. Neither would ever act on it on their own; their honor-and respect for Alistair-kept him from feeling any jealousy at all. He loved Solana completely and truly just wanted to give her something she'd always fantasized about. The question was, would Cullen be willing to step out of his own views on propriety and enjoy it as much as he knew his wife would?
When it came to Alistair, Cullen was always free with his flirting and affections. Knowing that his history with Lana was no secret, he kept very tight reigns on his outward affections toward her. She'd given her heart and vows to another and Cullen would, therefore, be respectful of that bond.
Alistair reflected on the day he discovered that his two closest friends had a shared history. They'd found Cullen at the circle tower, tortured, begging to be killed rather than endure the face of his tormentor anymore. Then the aftermath of his anger as he demanded that all mages be put down to eliminate the possibility of abominations. Lana had taken it all in stride, making sure everyone was safe, as she always did. She helped those that needed it and those that didn't know they needed it. Her face blank to her own emotions as she watched her old flame look at her with distrust and disdain.
She finally broken that night back at camp. Her mask crumbled as she confessed to Alistair the past that she and Cullen shared. She wept in his arms, describing the old dance that she remembered fondly. The memory of that brazen kiss she extracted from Cullen's, not so unwilling, lips when she was so unsure of what her future would bring. She stilled in his arms as he held her, listened to her, ran his fingers through her hair in comfort.
Though their relationship was still new, Alistair already loved Lana deeply. Hearing how she cared for-and desired-Cullen, the same man that he was so fond of, had taken a hold on part of Alistair's heart. Information to be tucked away for another day, another lifetime.
That night, Alistair shared his own stories of his days at the chantry with Cullen. Days filled with boyhood pranks and hope for the future. Together, they mourned the loss of their old friend as if Cullen died at the hand of Uldred in his coup to take over the tower. They'd taken comfort in each other's arms and soft spoken words.
After the blight ended, Alistair sought out his old friend and found him living in Kirkwall, having been promoted to Knight-Captain. It was a tentative reunion and he told himself, it was all for Lana. He needed to see how Cullen was healing from the ordeal, to bring Lana back good news; something to ease her heart before he asked her to marry him. But in truth, he missed Cullen too and was worried for him.
He spent two weeks in Kirkwall that trip, spending as much free time with Cullen as he could. Admittedly, it wasn't a lot, Cullen was always driven by duty, and things were pretty tense in Kirkwall at that time. But by the time he left, they'd slipped back into a comfortable camaraderie. Different, haunted by nightmares that neither were yet willing to share, but still. Their friendship was important to them, so they made it work. Alistair even left with Cullen's blessing for his union with Solana. He seemed genuinely happy for them and promised that-if he could get away-he would love to stand with them on their big day.
When Alistair told Lana of his trip, it was as if a visible weight was lifted from her shoulders. Oh she was mad at him for seeking out Cullen without telling her first, but she'd soon forgiven him after hearing that Cullen was much better than the last time they'd seen him. They decided that night, that the next chance they went to Kirkwall, they would solidify their union. Spending so much time recruiting for the Grey Wardens and putting out fires, it didn't take them long to return.
If Alistair said that his own reunion with Cullen was tentative, then seeing Solana and Cullen face to face after so long, was more than painful. Cullen knelt before her, taking her hand in his, laying his forehead upon it, and prayed for her forgiveness. He apologized for how he treated her in the tower, declaring how unworthy it had been of him. How she had never done anything to deserve his ire.
She looked down and him then over to Alistair with unshed tears glistening in her eyes. Pulling him to his feet-for a little thing, she was quite strong-she ripped her hand out of his, smacked his armored shoulder, then… she hugged him.
Poor Cullen, didn't know what to do. So shocked by her immediate forgiveness and her hug in reaction to his apology, that he just he stood there stiff, unyielding. He looked at Alistair like he was about to sprout three heads and take his life for being in such close proximity to the woman he wanted to marry. Alistair just grinned and shook his head at his friend's un-comfortableness. Cullen tentatively wrapped one arm around Lana and patted her shoulder. She suddenly laughed long and loud and hard at his awkwardness. He couldn't help but join in the laughter, before quickly deposited her back into Alistair's arms; where propriety demanded that she belonged.
True to his word, Cullen spoke for them both at the wedding. It was a small ceremony. Just the three of them and the Mother who blessed their union. Life became much more relaxed between them after that. Letters were scarce-Cullen always did suck at writing-but anytime their travels would bring them within a reasonable distance of the other's location, they managed to stop and catch up.
This trip was the first trip that Alistair made alone, since that first trip to Kirkwall. The first time he'd thought that perhaps, there was a chance for something more. Eyeing Cullen as he was finishing his meal, Alistair made up his mind that if he was going to ask, it was now or never.
"You hide it very well, you know." Alistair suddenly announced to his friend.
"Hmm, what's that?" Cullen was pulled out of his own reverie.
"Your feelings for her." Cullen looked startled and was about to protest when Alistair continued, "Peace, my dear friend, I mean no insult and there's no need for defenses. It's no secret between the three of us that you two have a history. It's also apparent-at least to me-that the two of you still carry that flame, though you are both so honor bound and easily enamored by my charm, wit, and incredibly good looks to ever act upon it."
Cullen stared at Alistair, wondering where this was going. His mouth dry, he took another long pull from his drink and waited.
"I was… um… actually hoping," Alistair coughed and tried again. "That is, if you might be willing to help me with a gift for her."
Cullen didn't hesitate, "Of course, my friend. Anything you need. You have only but to ask."
Alistair chuckled then winked his warning, "Be careful what you volunteer for, without knowing all the details first." He paused and sighed, "You know her name-day is coming up?"
Cullen nodded, not sure what it was that his friend was attempting to find courage enough to ask of him.
Alistair continued, "Cullen... I love Lana more than anything. You know that I would give her the moon and stars were they within my power to give. I want her to be happy and I know that she is, but I also know..." He took a moment to swirl his brandy in its sifter before taking a steadying drink. "I also know that there's a part of her that wants… that still wonders what it would be like, to know you… intimately."
Cullen blinked but dared not yet speak. This couldn't be leading to where he thought it was leading… could it?
"You have given us your friendship and blessing. I know she's my wife and I know you're my best friend and I really don't even know why or how I'm even asking this. But, I want to do something special for her. I would do anything to bring her happiness. Anything at all. Even…. you." Alistair's eyes were looking everywhere except at Cullen.
Cullen blinked again and found that his mouth was hanging open. He closed it and felt that familiar flush on his skin, but still couldn't find his voice. Do… Alistair? Not that the thought hadn't ever crossed Cullen's dirty little mind, but beyond flirting, the two old friends never ventured to cross that line before. In truth, Cullen never thought Alistair did anything more than humor Cullen's sexual teasing. Put up with them, at best. He rarely reciprocated.
"I mean; I don't mean to say. Damn it-this sounded so much better in my head." Alistair took a deep breath, "Would you be willing… Could you find it in yourself to… share a bed with my wife? To um… be her name-day present… from me?"
Cullen had to remind himself to breathe. "Alistair I-"
"No, don't answer yet. We have time. You know me, I don't offer to share her lightly. But please, will you think about it?" Alistair stood quickly and walked over to the door, not daring to turn around for fear of what his friend might think of him asking something so preposterous.
"Alistair?" Cullen said his name tentatively.
He looked back at Cullen, still sitting behind his desk.
"Thank you, for trusting me enough to ask this of me. I know it couldn't come easy for you. I will… consider what it is you ask." Cullen said the last in an almost inaudible, awe-like whisper.
Alistair nodded once with a crooked half-smile and stepped through the door out into the cool night air.
End Notes:
Originally written for DA Poly Week 2016: Day 5 - Happy Name-Day
Chapters 1-7 posted as a one chapter work on October 28, 2016
Chapter 8+ Added for Alistair Appreciation Week 2017: Day 7
Submitting November 12, 2017 (Happy birthday to me!)
