AarSon – The deliberate explosion of colour
Chapter 1 – Defences down, armour no longer needed
Aaron settled himself in the car and closed the door, although numbness constricted around his heart, a sense of piece wrapped around his body. For he knew, his defences were no longer needed, his weapons buried in the ground, he was free, to take off his armour. Aaron held onto the thought of the better place that awaited his arrival for as long as he could, but it was no use, the day's events attacked into his mind. Jackson's unplanned visit, Paddy's betrayal, the horrified stares of his family and friends, all mixed into one big haze that seeped into his head, just like the smoke seeping into the car, and into his lungs.
Aaron for a second deliberated whether or not to buckle his seat belt, but decided it was not necessary, considering the place he was going didn't require the car to move.
So, there goes his life, passing by, with every last breath, it's been so hard, one more minute gone, but only seconds remain.
Aaron's thoughts began to slow to an understandable pace...
"I know if there is a heaven, I won't be allowed in, people like me couldn't...and shouldn't be near normal people". Tears began to stream down Aaron's face, pain corrupting the last bit of life he has left. "I just wanted to be normal, I tried so hard, words can't describe how hard ...but Paddy was right, you shouldn't have to try...you should just feel".
The tears still ran, but this confused Aaron as, he could feel the pain disappearing from his core. He began to think of his dad, the incredible times they shared together, he hadn't thought of his dad recently, he wondered what his dad would have done if he found out his secret, Aaron unfortunately knew his dad hated 'them'...but could he really reject his own son because of who he is?
He had come so close to telling his father in the past, but, if he were here now, Aaron knew it wouldn't make any difference, his dad hated him, hated the boy who lashed out for no apparent reason...
Little did Mr Livesy know, his son was in pain, desperate to remain normal, clinging on for dear life. In Aaron's world, the stars all fell from the sky, all because of this lie.
As Aaron began to feel the full affects of the poison coursing through his veins, he turned on the radio, waiting to be taken, without realising, this will be the last song he will ever here. Lost like tears in the rain, Aaron began to cry harder, whispering the lyrics to the song that played on the radio. "Back beat, the word is on the street, that the fire in your heart is out".
As the song grew nearer the chorus, Aaron began to drift, sensing the end is nearing. The song finally hit the chorus, and Aaron began to choke, he pictured Jacksons face, remembering his soft, innocent brown eyes. Forgetting the events that transpired earlier today, and forgetting all the moments that lead him to taking his own life, he began to smile, happy to be picturing something so perfect, so breathtaking...maybe, just maybe, Jackson could have been the one to save him.
Aaron closed his weary eyes, finally letting go, it was out of his control. Aaron was slowly drowning in his sleep, away from everyone who cared for him, away from the people he loved, colours filled his lungs, off to a better place he went. A place where no one could hurt him, nor he could hurt himself, a place his armour is not necessary, no more lies, he was finally free.
Adam set off on the hunt for his missing friend, confused as to why he would go to such great lengths to hide his sexuality, after all, he wasn't a monster, he couldn't help the way he was. The first place he looked just happened to be the place he needed to be. Walking up to the garage doors, still unaware of the haze seeping through onto the outside.
"Oh no" Adam whispered to himself, finally noticing the thick smoke, he couldn't explain why but, he just knew this was not the cause from a fire. He didn't know for sure it was Aaron in there but, the feeling of dread washing over him told him he was. Peering through a gap in the door, Adams feelings were confirmed. Frantically kicking the door now, his eyes focusing on the extent of his progress.
"Oi, just what the hell do you think your doing?" Cain shouted, running instantly towards Adam.
"Its Aaron, he's in there, he's trying to kill himself...help me get him out!"
Cain noticed the ever growing smoke coming from the inside, without any hesitation he began to kick the door with Adam, not stopping to ask him why Aaron was doing this.
They broke through the doors quickly, searching desperately for signs of life. Taking Aaron away from the fumes to ground outside, both recognising Aaron was not breathing, his lungs filled with colours. Cain's despair quickly turned productive, as he went to find the people who loved Aaron the most.
"C'mon mate, C'mon." Adam whispered desperately. Seconds ticked by, there was still no sign of life, Adam couldn't help but notice, inbetween his attempt at reviving Aaron, how piecefull he looked, this was the first time in months he had seen Aaron like this, Aaron lately looked agitated, defensive and...lost. The realisation of just how lost Aaron was hit Adam hard.
Moments later Cain returned with a frantic Chas and Paddy. Paddy looked, broken, almost as if he expected Aaron never to breathe again. Chas screamed at Adam in desperation
"keep trying, he's not dead...I CANT LOSE HIM".
Adam kept trying, losing faith with every second that ticked by, tears falling down his cheeks.
The small crowd surrounding Aaron, suddenly went quiet, shock corrupting their systems, could Aaron really be gone? Adam stopped giving Aaron mouth to mouth, resting his hands onto Aaron's chest, letting out low undetectable moans of agony. But suddenly, Adam felt the beating of Aaron's heart beneath his hands.
Breathing life into a lifeless sole.
TBC
