Rewriting the Game
One: Commencing the Game
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed."
― C.G. Jung
Lelouch held a hand out to Suzaku, the day of the latter's private knighting. Suzaku hardly received the honor like a traditional knight. He stood before Lelouch, his eyes dispassionate, hands out ready to take his sword back. Lelouch ignored him, continued to hold the sword, and stared at Suzaku. He couldn't read the knights' eyes. If there were any happiness left in them, it was long gone before Lelouch could ever catch it. Lelouch waited, although he didn't know what he was waiting for. A reprimand for his actions? An apology? Simply an explanation for how their friendship, as twisted yet beautiful it was?
There was a tense silence between the two, before Lelouch sighed and gave the sword back. Suzaku kept staring at Lelouch, sheathing the sword, but not saying a word. After all, there wasn't much he could say at this point. They certainly weren't best friends anymore. They can't even be considered just friends. They were like strangers, and the knighting ceremony just a formality between two people. There was more silence before Suzaku stepped back, and gave him a stiff bow. Lelouch nodded back, before leaving the room without looking back. He wasn't sure why he felt so sad. And how after all the time he and Suzaku had spent together, their friendship had crumbled to dust.
Lelouch stepped through the halls of his palace, alone. There was a lot of work to be done, but he needed a break from his plans. He'd just knighted his friend. His sister's knight. The one he'd killed. How ironic.
Lelouch snorted at the cruelty of it all. Both of them were barely adults. Yet today, they've just became the two most powerful people in the world. A failed prince and a lowly Number. How they've managed to climb up this high was a mystery. And Lelouch would have to reap the benefits of whatever came out of it.
Lelouch sighed. Alright, then.
He'll reap the benefits of this situation as well.
Suzaku stared dispassionately at the wall by Lelouch. He still hadn't answered the emperor's question, and he had no intention of doing so. Lelouch was trying to get some sort of peace, some sort of weird partnership, between them. Suzaku wasn't going to let that happen.
"Suzaku." Suzaku reluctantly looked from the wall to Lelouch's face.
"Yes, Your Majesty?" His answer was practically dripping with sarcasm. Lelouch's eyes narrowed with displeasure. Suzaku let himself feel satisfied over the tiny victory.
"What are your thoughts in this matter?" Lelouch repeated, voice cold. Ah. So he's actually annoyed with Suzaku now. Taking a short breath, Suzaku slowly reigned himself back into a obedient knight.
"I think it's a horrible idea," He deadpanned, "Your low ratings will get even lower. You're going to loose support from the few nobles that are still with you." There. He'd said it. Direct opposition. Lelouch is going to find it really hard to find peace now.
Lelouch closed his eyes and let an audible breath out. "Do you think I care about ratings?" He sounded irritated, and Suzaku winced internally. Of course he didn't. He's already dropped so low, not even Charles had done this badly. "No, but you should care about your support. I've talked with Gino-"
"And Lord Weinberg's support is so important to me because?" Lelouch interrupted, his eyes boring into Suzaku. Under an untrained person, they would probably grovel and beg for mercy. In Suzaku's case, he just returned it with a slight glare.
"Your support is the only way you can actually get all the people that wanted Schneizel to follow you. If the nobles do, then the regular people will be more inclined to as well."
"I don't give a shit about that," Lelouch snapped. He was swearing, so that meant he wanted the matter dropped entirely. Alright, time for Suzaku's trump card.
"Nunnally wouldn't like it," He blurted out. As soon as he said it, he felt a pang of regret as Lelouch immediately broke eye contact and pressed his lips together. Lelouch knew he was right, or course. Nunnally had mailed her brother hundreds of letters, begging him to stop his cruelty. But he continued to trap her in Japan, making sure she stayed safe and out of his business.
Suzaku knew that he was going to get reprimanded. What was it going to be this time? Be with Llyod in his endeavors again? Translate every Japanese text in the library for the fourth time? He's been ordered to clean the soldier's barracks so much, it was hardly a punishment. In fact, Suzaku liked hanging out with the other officers off duty, even if they were wary of him. It was better than staying with Lelouch.
Instead, Lelouch simply let out a long sigh. "She wouldn't, would she?" He asked softly. Suzaku blinked in surprise. Lelouch still wasn't looking at Suzaku, so the knight had no idea if he was actually asking for an answer. He decided to remain silent, earning himself a glare. Suzaku resisted glaring back, and let himself lean against the wall, content with waiting Lelouch's anger out.
There was silence.
Finally, Lelouch gave a quiet, "Just do it, Kururugi." His last name. So it was a hard, nonnegotiable order. Suzaku clenched his teeth, trying not to think about what he was about to do. He gave a curt bow from his waist, ignoring the standard kneel, and let himself out.
Lelouch fell tiredly against his bed. "Hello, witch." He greeted C.C., who was lounging in a chair and munching on pizza.
"Did you get in a fight with Suzaku again? That poor boy. He can't even say that he hates you. It's so obvious, it's hilarious," C.C. said with a laugh, picking up another slice of pizza.
"Shut it." Lelouch wasn't in the mood to discuss Suzaku. He didn't want to talk about how he'd almost snapped when Suzaku mentioned Nunnally.
"Oh don't talk to the reason why you won like that, boy emperor," C.C. teased, a smirk on her face, like she knew everything about Lelouch's troubles and thought they were hilarious.
"I didn't just win with you." Lelouch said tiredly. He didn't want to argue about this again.
"I'm a major reason, though." C.C. reminded him, taking a bite of her pizza.
"The only thing you did-"
"Was give you crucial information? Or yes, so unimportant." She lamented, looking at his splayed body.
"I would've figured it out, and besides, you were given that information."
"Ah yes, by being tortured and forced to have stuff put in my brain is totally just that. You obviously didn't need me or anything. Totally." Her voice was so sarcastic, Lelouch held back a groan. She sounded so much like Suzaku with that tone. As if she knew what he was thinking about, her smirk widened and she promptly got off the chair and sat next to him.
"Having troubles about your knight?" Her voice was light, but Lelouch caught a hint of smugness in her tone. He snorted and turned over on the bed.
"Doesn't matter. He just needs to follow orders." He said into his pillows.
"You're going to break the relationship off entirely then?"
Lelouch turned to glare at the girl. "We never had a 'relationship' besides mutual hate, C.C."
"So you're going to throw away your childhood?"
Lelocuh shrugged, "He already has. I shouldn't even try to fix it."
Suzaku walked briskly down the corridor, with a bored Anya trailing after him, looking angrily around for Gino. The other knight was usually always at the training center, but today he had disappeared off to god knows where. Suzaku resisted the urge to scream. If he was even a tiny bit sloppy with this mission, Lelouch would have more of a reason to make his life miserable.
Finally, he caught up with the knight when he crashed into the kitchens, scaring several servants away with his furious yell for the knight. Gino, for the nerve of that guy, was chatting with a chef. His loud laugh stopped when Suzaku practically wrenched him away from his conversation. Gino's cry of protest was cut off when he saw the flash of Anya's camera and the scowling Suzaku.
"Hey, Suzaku! What's happening? Don't tell me Lelouch-"
"The mission." Suzaku interjected hotly. He was so behind schedule, Lelouch was going to have his head cut off when this was all done. Dammit, he was supposed to be an efficient knight, despite how much he hated his job.
Gino's mouth dropped open. Then he smacked a hand over this forehead. "Shit! I forgot, sorry, sorry! Here, we can go now!"
"I already have the Triston on standby. Hurry up." He usually wasn't this cold to Gino, but Suzaku was pissed. Gino ran off to change, and Suzaku and Anya went to the knightmare hangers.
He let out a long sigh as they walked, and was surprised to hear Anya let out a low chuckle. She's been more responsive after Marianne's death, and he'd hoped the surgery to heal the various tests Lelouch's mother did on the poor girl helped her memory. He snorted softly. Of course the son would be just as cruel as the mother. And to think he used to believe she was a great person.
"Anya, I'll send the coordinates over, try to keep everything to me, alright? Make sure you don't get too caught up on the job. You can tell Gino that too, I just don't really want to talk to him now."
Anya nodded, but glanced over her shoulder and snapped a picture. Suzaku turned and saw the Knight of Three running while pulling his jacket on, his left boot dangling off his foot.
"I'm backing you up regardless." Gino called from the hallway. "Don't worry! I know you hate me but I'm really sorry!"
Suzaku sighed. "It's fine, just don't me more late. And put your boot on properly."
"Right-o Captain!"
Kallen pulled her arm out of the broken Sutherland, silently wishing she had brought her Guren. But Xiangle was insistent that she can't "expose herself" and she had to be held back from kicking him. Alas.
She pulled her hood over her face to cover her red hair, quickly jumped down from the rubble, and began searching bodies for a gun. She'd lost hers when her piece-of-shit Sutherland was blown up. Damn Lelouch. Of course they stood no chance against three knights of the Empire. Their little hideout in India wasn't going to last very long. Thankfully, Lelouch hadn't discovered their main base, but it was so fucking annoying having every single fort destroyed every time they tried to advance towards Britannia. She knew this tactic wasn't working.
The Black Knights haven't been the same ever since Lelouch left and became their enemy. Their half-baked attempts at rebellion were always crushed before they even started. Lelouch's overwhelming power was being burned into everyone's minds until most had deserted the rebels. The only reason why they were surviving in the first place was because of-
A boom distracted Kallen of her thoughts, and she hid behind a piece of damaged Knightmare. She felt a spray of blood land on her broken arm and hissed. Everyone was being slaughtered under Suzaku and his forces. He'd only brought a fraction of the rebel's forces, but the Black Knight's crumbled beneath the Lancelot's powers. She flipped another person, but only found a sad knife. They were loosing so much supplies. Damn! If only she had the Guren-
A tell-tale click of a gun made her freeze, and she quickly hid the knife under the sleeve of her good arm.
"Turn around. Slowly." A cold voice told her. She held her hands up, making sure her knife slide into her sleeve, and turned slowly.
It was Gino. Kallen almost gasped. She opened her mouth, but Gino's grim expression stopped her. Then it occurred to Kallen that Gino probably couldn't recognize her. She was wearing a mask, and her hood had covered all of her hair. Perhaps she could get out of the situation without him knowing who she was.
"Take your mask off." Kallen slowly inched her hand up to her face, before flickering the knife to her hand and slashing forward. Immediately, Gino sent off a shot. It hit her right in the thigh, and she crumpled. Dammit. Dammit! She'd forgotten how well trained the knights of the empire were. The training the rebels received lacked so much. She'd softened against lesser opponents.
She got onto her good leg, and cut towards Gino's advancing form, but was promptly grabbed and had her mask tugged off in one swift move. Gino's eyes widened with surprise. "You're...Karen?" He asked. Of course he used her Britannian name.
"Kallen," She spat. Then she quickly realized her mistake. She shouldn't have corrected him.
"I'm going to have to take you," He explained with furrowed eyebrows, when he pulled out some rope. "Does it hurt?" He asked after trying her hands behind her back. Her broken arm strained painfully against the bindings.
Kallen almost laughed at his fake sympathy. "Of course it does, you Britannian scum." He frowned at that, and Kallen expected some sort of blow, but it never came. Instead, she heard footsteps coming towards them, and Gino stiffening to attention.
There was only one person here right now that outranked Gino.
"Hello, Kallen," The man in front of her greeted in Japanese. "It's been a while."
Suzaku.
Gino fidgeted with his hands as they flew back to Pendragon. He knew his job and what he had to do, but he'd always hated these type of missions. The rebels always camped within a Number's town, so when they went to destroy it, they'd have to plow the whole town down. He forced himself to forget. He was stuck in a car since he had damaged the Triston's right wing and was forced to dismount. He guessed it was good he did, since he'd found Kallen. But still. Anya chose to ride with him, and she'd tried to comfort him. But he knew he'd failed this mission.
Even though it was a success, Lelouch wanted clean, glorious victories, not half-broken knightmare that are pathetically dragged behind a car-type victories. But Suzaku was going to be the one at the end of Lelouch's anger. He pressed his lips together and sighed. Suzaku had to bear with so much shit because of him during this mission. They were already behind schedule. And now?
Gino wanted to patch the relationship between Suzaku and the emperor, not make it worse. Anya, as if sensing his distress, put a hand on his shoulder.
"Kallen is important. It's good that you found her." Of course he knew. She was a key player in the rebel forces, and was a classmate of Lelouchs, (and his classmate, at one point). Her capture was good for Lelouch. But he didn't know if killing all those people and getting Suzaku into trouble was worth it.
"Don't think about those things, it's better to just move on. You just followed orders." Anya reminded him softly. He looked down at the girl who was already typing today's bloody history down. Lelouch's orders to help fix her had brought so much life back into her. He guessed that was a good thing too. No, it was a great thing the emperor finally did.
He sat back on against his seat, and closed his eyes. Whatever's happening, he just hoped everything was going to be alright in the end, and that his friend's diary will finally be filled with happier times.
Suzaku reluctantly decided to kneel before Lelouch. Then again, he was being watched by the Knight of Rounds and hundreds of Lelouch's forces, so he really didn't have a choice. Nevertheless, the gesture of fealty and obedience left a bitter taste in his mouth.
"Sir Kururugi," Lelouch addressed, head leaned against his hand. His eyes scanned coolly over the room, making several in the crowd flinch. "I take your mission was a success?"
Of course it was. It will never not be a success, because Lelouch was just so goddamn good. "Yes, Your Majesty," He answered, carefully letting the submissive knight tone bleed into his voice and his teeth from clenching.
"Can you explain why you were a half hour late from planned, and why Lord Weinburg's knightmare looks like a mess then?" Lelouch's voice was almost mocking, and Suzaku flinched slightly. Lelouch was choosing to publicly call him out. Ah. This was probably punishment from earlier. He knew he shouldn't have even mentioned Nunnally.
"It was...due to my incompetence, Your Majesty." This time, he couldn't let the clench in his teeth go.
"I see." Lelouch was practically smirking as he said that, looking down at Suzaku was such thinly veiled satisfaction, Suzaku held back from actually glaring.
"Was it due to your incompetence that Lord Weinburg was the one who found the prisoner, and not you, as well?" Lelouch pressed. The whole room descended into a flurry of whispers, but quickly quieted down after Lelouch's glance towards them.
Suzaku closed his eyes, letting his bowed figure hide his displease. "Yes, Your Majesty," He answered after a pause.
"I'm glad we got that settled." Lelouch leaned back against his throne, lifting his head and peered down at the crowd. "Dismissed." He said calmly to the crowd, and everyone scrabbled to get out of the room. Suzaku didn't miss the whispers about him that flew around the room, though. And it was obvious Lelouch wouldn't either.
Suzaku stayed on his knees, waiting for the order to be dismissed as well. It never came. Suzaku looked up at Lelouch and scowled. Lelouch actually had the atrocity to laugh at his discomfort. "You didn't have to lie, Suzaku," Lelouch said, head going back against his hand.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Suzaku snapped.
"I heard from Lord Weinberg, that it was, how did he phrase it? 'None of Suzaku's fault and all mine?' and something about a boot." Lelouch explained, letting his tone go back to mocking. Suzaku sat back onto his knees, and looked questioningly at Gino. The other knight flushed.
"So now I don't know who to trust," Lelouch said, "Which one of my knights are lying, I wonder?"
Suzaku really wanted to punch him. In fact, he was barely holding back. One more second of looking at Lelouch's face and he was really going to loose it.
"You already know, you asshole," He said icily, fists clenching at his sides.
"And yet I don't. Would you care to tell me?" Lelouch raised an eyebrow. "You're acting quite like a child, Suzaku. At this point, Lord Weinberg would make a better Knight of Zero."
Alright. That was it. Even though he knew it was a taunt and he knew he shouldn't react, he still stood straight up, fuming.
"Dismiss the other people," He snapped.
"Don't get so-"
"Do it. Now, " Suzaku snarled.
Lelouch examined him for a while, before lifting a single hand and flicked it once, a silent dismissal. The Knights of Round rushed out the room, with Gino hesitating for a moment, then leaving with a quick apologetic glance at Suzaku.
They were finally alone.
Suzaku immediately stepped up to the podium, and grabbed Lelouch by his collar. Lelouch's crown fell off with a clang as the jewels on the hat hit the ground.
"You insufferable asshole, you fucking shitty son of a bitch-" He started, furious that he couldn't actually hurt his emperor. Lelouch simply glanced at him, violet eyes bearing deep into emerald ones. Lelouch's calm only aggravated Suzaku more, and he shook the emperor.
"Do you even know what you're doing? To your reputation? To your people?" Suzaku growled, "Goddammit, Lelouch!" Suzaku shook Lelouch again, but the emperor didn't react. Lelouch finally sighed, and Suzaku let go of the other boy's shirt. He stood there waiting for an answer. Lelouch smirked, and looked at Suzaku's irritated expression.
"You did well, Suzaku," Lelouch said, letting warmth into his voice for the first time since he'd knighted the other. Suzaku just frowned deeper at Lelouch's double meaning.
"I am your Knight of Zero. No one else," Suzaku snapped out. He gave Lelouch a quick bow, and dismissed himself.
Notes:
I don't know if this will be multi-chapter, even though it's set up as one. This was really just a piece exploring relationships that got a little too big. I really wanted to explore the relationship between Lelouch and Suzaku if they actually never "made up" through the requiem. It's so dialogue heavy because I wanted to convey how Lelouch and Suzaku's words to each other were so cold, like strangers, but they also knew each other the best out of everyone. They interact differently with other people (Suzaku is more friendly to Gino and Anya, Lelouch shows more of himself with C.C.). And it's just so sad that their relationship turned south so fast.
Also, Suzaku gets less analytical when he's upset (compare his first POV with Lelouch and the ending). Just a thought to point out because I really loved writing angry Suzaku. He's usually so physical but he couldn't do anything to Lelouch. Poor kid.
The ending was so confusing to me as well, lol. It seemed to me that despite all the hate these two had for each other, they still stuck together and was able to get things done so efficiently, so I guess that's my explanation for it...? If this is the first chapter of many, I'll probably dwell deeper into their twisted relationship.
Honestly these two exhaust me.
Constructive criticism or just reviews are welcomed. Thank you for reading.
Also, to clear up confusion: this is Non-Geass. C.C. is implanted with government secrets by V.V. Marianne, and Charles; she helped Lelouch win against Schneizel. Gino and Anya joined up with Suzaku and continued being Knights because I can't bear to part with them.
