Maximum Ride: My God, My Life Sucks. Chapter One.
(Title may change soon)
Oh, my god. Please, someone: Kill. Me. Now. No joke.
I already know all of this shit! Trust me, you're kind of forced to if you have to take care of seven — okay, more like six because Fang does as he pleases, and five if you take away Total (our talking [very annoying] dog) — mutant bird-kids. So, why do I have to take care of a potato? Kids are one thing, simple and clean (mostly), but potatoes? I mean, seriously, get real. I'll eat one before I'll play mommy with it.
Why did I feel like I was going to fail this class? Simple.
Because: a) I so can't look at a potato without thinking: Oh, look, dinner, b) I have to keep finding escape routes from Jimmy (my personal "stalker,") because he has the class next door, c) Fang is in this class (no sweat; I can handle that) but; d) Fang is in this class and flirts with Red-Head Wonder II, e) I'm an (obviously) anti-social "smart-aleck" that is paranoid of almost everyone. There you have it. Wait — no. No, you don't! f) I have wings. There, now you have it.
"Miss. Ride," Mrs. Love (I know, weird name, right?) coughed. "Miss. Ride, would you please stop staring off into space and listen for once? Or would you like a detention?"
Che, bitch. "Huh? What'd ya say? I wasn't listening," I said honestly, shaking my head out of "space," as she called it.
Soft giggles echoed throughout the room, and Mrs. Love seemed to hate that. "Miss. Ride, stop trying to go for the laugh, and pay attention!"
Weird thing was, I wasn't trying to go for the laugh. So, of course, this made me mad. "Sorry, please, continue. I'm sure we all love the sound of your lovely voice going on and on and on and on."
The whole class (of course, minus Fang, who gave me a disappointed frown) burst out laughing.
"Enough!" Mrs. Love yelled, checks turning red. "Enough! Maximum Ride, you have an office referral. Go, now!"
Gosh, touché much?
I did a quick gasp, putting my hand over my mouth. "T-t-t-the office?" The other students started laughing harder. "W-o-w. Your punishment is to make me walk seven yards, open a door, sit in a chair for thirty minutes 'waiting,' then go in a room and get 'lectured,' for twenty more minutes? Oh, my god. I swear, I'll never, ever do it again."
I did a quick 360 with my eyes, and everyone was laughing, holding onto their stomach (and, you guessed it, Fang was just rolling his eyes at me). What do you know: I can be the life of the party.
Mrs. Love looked like a mixture of mad and embarrassed, giving me the oh-so-famous "I-so-wish-I-could-hit-you-right-now," look.
"Just leave, now." She said, point a chubby finger towards the door. Like I needed directions, lady.
I stood up, swinging my hand-me-down plain black backpack (first Iggy, then Fang, now me) over my shoulder and headed out the door, graping the orange slip from Mrs. Love's hand along the way.
"Maximum, you forgot your baby." Mrs. Love called.
I groaned heading back into the room and took my (stupid, stupid) potato and left. My eyes catching Red-Head Wonder II curling her hair with her index finger and smiling like a goofball at Fang while he talked. I inwardly groaned, heading out the door. Sure, he'll talk to the bimbo, but not to me. I mean, its not like I'm jealous or anything. Just annoyed. Yeah, very, very annoyed.
So, yeah. I bet y'all are all wondering: What the flip is Maximum (THE Maximum) Ride doing in school? Well, that's simple. We (the flock and I) destroyed Itex and everything, and instead of kicking it back on a deserted island like Fang and I had planned, we were living with my mom and Ella at their house and going to school. We even built a six-roomed hut-like-thing connected to the house. Sounds fun, right? Well, wrong.
(I seem to make lists a lot now, huh?)
Because:
1) I have a stalker that is obsessed with me.
2) The teachers act as if they can control me, and naturally, I retort back.
3) I get sent to the office/detention/*RAC so much that they know me by name.
4) I hardly have any friends (I could care less, though).
5) The pops (or the populars) sucked up Fang and ditched Iggy, Ella, and me (again, I could care less).
6) Fang let them ditch us.
7) Fang and I have become really distant.
8) Fang and Red-Head Wonder II flirt all the time.
9) Iggy and Ella make lovey-dovey eyes at each other all-the freaking-time. (Even though Iggy is blind, he seems to know when she's staring at him, because he stares right back!)
10) Angel, Gazzy, and Nudge don't seem to need me anymore.
I know, I know. I shouldn't mope around and complain about how sucky life is, but it's just unfair. I mean, I saved the whole freaking world, right? I lived in a fucking cage most of my life, right? I kicked the whitecoats butts, right? I dealt with the whole half-brother-tried-to-kill-me-yet-I-saved-him-even-though-it-spilt-apart-my-flock-thing, right? Then, why can't I handle this, then? I'll tell you why: because I DESERVE A BREAK! But, nooo. Everyone decides that now is a good time to flip on me! So typical.
Well, you know what? I'm tired of this.
I took a sharp left, heading in the opposite direction of the office, ripping up the stupid slip along the way.
Let's see them try to stop me now.
I took of my big, black baggy jacket (another hand-me-down) and stuffed into my backpack, reviling my dark blue tank top with slits in the back. Ah, sweet freedom.
I ran through the bulletproof glass doors of the school and took a quick left, heading to Fang's last period door, and ditched my backpack up in the tree, knowing he'll look there one way or another and took of running to the school's garden, taking flight.
Freedom. Sweet, sweet freedom.
See ya later, losers. Won't miss ya.
*RAC: Its a stupid little "program" that they do if you break a certain rule a certain amount of times. They basically just pull you out of your regular classes and stuck you in a big, boring room filed with other kids, and force you to be quiet all day and don't move.
Yeah, I guess, I hope y'all liked it. I just got bored and decide to type this. I might continue this. It really just depends. I guess..
But, if I do decide to continue this, don't get your hopes up. I'm not going to update regularly. Its just going to be a random thing. I've too much on my plate right now, I just got bored.
