CHAPTER ONE!

Dear Diary,

Today is my first day at Hogwarts. I miss Beaubaxton all ready. It's sooooooo cold here, and y'know what I really don't like the professors all ready. They're just so…well, ew. And the ghosts? Don't even get me started, though that Peeves, is pretty cool. He totally rocked when he scared all of the first years back into the lake and then the squid molested the children. I think they are still in the infirmary. But I got put into Ravenclaw, which is like, the smart house here?

But even thought, they're the smart house, they're dumb. It's like, no one has noticed that I'm not human. Like, isn't the pale skin a tip off? C'mon, I didn't eat at dinner and I have fangs. Is it really that hard to put two and two together? Even my idiot roommate (who died…accidently) back at Beaubaxton figured it out. Maybe that's why Daddy asked me to invite her over for the summer? Who knows, but Daddy was really angry when I got kicked out from school. And it's all his fault, because he told him every good Vampire has a harem. Just look at him and my moms; I think there is one for every century he has been "alive." He's looking for a sixth mommy.

But back to him being angry—I don't see why. He told me! So, like, he didn't say I couldn't, well, y'know go after professors. It's not like I did it in public, I mean we went to his rooms—he never said that Madame Maxim did bed-checks on the male professors! Then she fire-called my Daddy, and he was all like, "I meant that only male Vampires had Harems." And I was like, "You didn't say that—and why do I have to listen to you." And then he grounded me…and made me go to all of those weird meetings he goes to, with those creepy masked people and that snake-guy. I think he calls himself a lord or something, but yeah, I've never heard of him before. But at least he was too busy to keep an eye on me. Some of those guys were really cute under their masks, like that blond guy. But I think he was married, um, but he didn't act like it.

But back on topic, all the guys I've met so far keep asking me to go to their rooms, but I'm like, "I'm not that kind of girl. I'm the one who invites you, so y'know, just wait until I say jump." Yeah, Daddy taught me to be a princess, because I am. I am the Princess of Vampires—those weird Volturri that like, try to tell my Daddy what to do, totally have nothing on me. And they like…sparkle. It's pretty! And I like things that sparkle, especially well…a girl never tells all her secrets, even in her diary.

But I have to go to bed, or at least say I've gone to bed but I really need a snack.

Until next time,

Saeran Kamari Amey Waverly

I closed my neon pink and silver diary and tucked under my pillow before I got up. I really need to eat more because my bra isn't fitting right anymore, and I really don't want to lose my DDs. After all, how else am I supposed to get people to do my work for me, seriously? I tiptoed out of the dorm room and left Ravenclaw Tower. I wandered around, and when that icky man with the cat walked around I floated to the ceiling and walked up there. He couldn't see me and the cat kept quiet—good for it, because I'd have eaten it.

But cats really don't taste good, too gamey. But dogs taste like chicken, people taste like pork. I really like people; they're friendly, yummy, and easy.

I left the ceiling and started walking along when someone shouted, "What are you doing out of bed."

I turned around and grinned, "Just hungry."

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