Itachi was in the bathroom, glaring at the kimono laid out on the counter before him. It was dark blue, and had images of reaching lotus flowers on the bottom, their white standing out against the otherwise dark fabric. He didn't have a problem with that- it was the fact that it was a DRESS. Which WOMEN wear. He was mistaken for a woman enough.

Oh, and the fact that it only came down to about two inches under his hip didn't help.

It was incredibly short, even a woman would say that. It was unnervingly skimpy. He also had black high heels, like the ones Tsunade wore, to go with it.

DAMNIT! Why did he ever go near that store? Why did he pick this out? Why did he pick ANYthing out? What the hell was he thinking?! WHY IN THE WORLD DID HE GET HIGH-HEELS?!!

But he knew why.

Surrendering, he slipped the scant fabric on his lithe frame. It fit him perfectly, which didn't make his mood any brighter. He glowered, looking in the mirror. Far too much of his pale skin was showing. The billowing arms covered his hands, and their heaviness brought the shoulders of the kimono slightly downward. They weren't hanging over his shoulders entirely, but they were falling just enough to show the expanse of his collarbone.

He heaved a great sigh, blowing his bangs around just a tiny bit. He had to hurry. His plan would be ruined if he didn't time this perfectly. Itachi hadn't heard the door to their hotel room open yet, but that didn't mean it hadn't.

He picked up the first black stiletto, setting his foot on the toilet to fasten the top. It was just over the bulge of his ankle, and he had the distinct impression that that was going to chafe like hell.

The TV could be heard through the bathroom door. "2009 starts in three, two, one," Itachi scrambled to put the other shoe on. "HAPPY NEW YEAR!!" The TV screamed. Itachi walked out, sturdy despite the high heels.

"Kisame," he said sexily, setting one hand on his feminine hip. Kisame turned his head, surprised. Itachi spoke softly, despite the din coming from the television. "Happy New Year."

As Itachi felt his back hitting the bed hard, he decided that maybe the damn dress wasn't so bad.

After all, it's fashion.