My first attempt at a Glee fanfic. Hopefully it's alright.
I own nothing.
let me slip away
She's had it planned out since she started speaking, or rather, singing. Neither of her fathers is sure which came first.
It's simple: she'll be headlining Broadway shows by age 18 and winning a Tony the same year. Rachel knows all too well that being talented takes a lot of time, so in reaching this goal, there is no way she'll have any for boys; especially ones that play football and are only sort of good at singing. (Even if they are kind of completely adorable.)
Glee club is just like practice, she thinks at the beginning, because in the grand scheme of things it's just a way to get herself seen; a means to an end. But she's never really had friends, so she slowly starts to fall in love with her club-mates, even though they're so intimidated by her talent that they aren't always the nicest to her and they'll probably never see their names shining on marquees in New York City like she will.
It's comforting to think, though, that some of them, like Finn (or only Finn, really) are willing to be there for her when she gets slushied or gets hurt by her mother or just needs someone.
She tries to stop the ugly thoughts swirling around her head: he's a sweetheart, but really, who needs kindness when you've got talent. He almost wins her over a few times, but only almost.
Jesse's nothing like Finn; he's complicated and almost as talented as she is, and he really understands what she's been after her whole life because he's been after it too.
But then it all comes crashing down and she's suddenly very glad that Finn is as simple as he is.
"He doesn't deserve you," Finn says afterwards, grabbing her into a hug that erases everything that's gone on between them.
It makes her very uneasy that his words and his arms around her feel about as good as an encore cheer from an audience.
"Let's get you cleaned up."
...
He takes her to the staff washroom, telling her it's the cleanest, but really it's because he can't decide whether the boys' or the girls' would be more awkward. It's after four-thirty anyway, so the school is already deserted.
He helps her wash the egg out of her hair, "This is kind of important, isn't it?"
She wipes her eyes, "What is?"
"Winning regionals."
"Yeah," she smiles, "But not because of Jesse," his name comes out softer than the rest of her sentence, but she quickly regains her strength, "We want to win because we're the best, which we are, not because we want to beat Vocal Adrenaline."
"Aren't they the same thing?"
"No, of course not. Winning should be about putting ourselves out there and showing we're better than everyone thinks we are, not some rivalry."
"But beating Vocal Adrenaline would be a great bonus. It would destroy them."
With a grin she adds, "Almost as much as egging our most talented singer would have if you weren't around."
"Exactly," he responds, letting her be conceited this once, only because she was covered in egg two minutes ago.
...
"I love you," he announces before the one performance that means everything.
And she thinks sadly, maybe one day when I've put Ohio on the map with my talent and I'm really in need of someone nice I'll come back for you.
So she just smiles softly up at him. It's enough for that moment.
...
It's by no means her best performance, but it's real and passionate and the audience loves them, just like they always love her.
For a second, she forgets that Glee is nothing, just a means to an end, and leans over to hug Finn.
In that second, she's okay with it just being the high school Glee club. In that second, she thinks she loves him, too.
But, she tries to tells herself, even though she knows it isn't entirely true, only in that second.
Please review! Constructive criticism is always welcome.
