A Joy in his Heart

Everyone has one regret or another in their life. Some more than others. Some want to go back and fix things. Others would rather focus on the future and fix what they can. Sam Winchester was the guy who wanted to make things right. Fix what he did. He never suspected ever having to make something right, such as taking care of his kid. Yes, you read that right. Sam was a father.

It all started during a hunt, at a hospital. Sam and his grandfather, Samuel, had caught wind of a vengeful spirit haunting a local medical plaza, in a small town in North Dakota. This was, of course, while Sam's soul was still in the cage.

Long story, short after helping keep one of the nurses safe, Sam scored that night before him and his grandfather left town. He hadn't seen or heard from the nurse since. How the moose of a guy found himself at a gas station, in that same town, two years later, Sam wasn't sure.

Sam was leaning against the Impala's trunk, with his hands shoved into the pockets of his jacket. He was waiting on the gas to finish pumping as Riot snoozed in the front seat. Things were quiet around the small gas station.

When the gas finished pumping, Sam took the pump out and returned it to its hook. As he closed the tank, he heard a young woman cry out. Sam looked up in time to see a kid run out, in front of a car that had just pulled into the gas station. Reacting on his feet, Sam dashed over and grabbed ahold of the small child, leaping out of the way of the incoming car, barely missing them. He watched it, drive pass as Sam laid on the ground, holding the child on top of him.

The young woman who had screamed, came running over, grabbing the child from him and hugging it, tightly, in her arms. "Micah, what am I gonna do with you? Why can't you listen?" She kissed the child, over and over, in relief.

Sam got to his feet, brushing himself off.

"Thank you so much," she thanked him.

It's okay. I'm just glad the kid's fine," he replied, modest. When Sam lifted his head, the woman got a better look at him.

"Wait a minute. Sam?"

His head shot, straight up.

"Sam, is that you?"

"How…?" He got a look at the woman. It can't be. "Clarissa?" How Sam remembered this woman, he wasn't sure. But, his eyes noticed hers. Clarissa had dark blue eyes, darker than anyone else Sam had ever met. There wasn't forgetting a pair like that, even if he tried.

Both of them were in shock. "What...What are you doing?" she asked him.

"I was passing through and was running low on gas, so I thought I'd stop for gas and lunch." Then, it hit him. The kid in her arms didn't look no more than two years old. It had been two years since him and Samuel had been there. Not to mention, he couldn't help notice how much the kid looked an awful lot like him, around that age, according to photos he'd seen.

Clarissa noticed Sam was looking at the child in her arms. "Her name's Micah," she told him. "She's two. Going through the terrible two's, actually."

"Sorry," Sam dropped his gaze to the ground. "I don't mean to stare."

"It's okay. Um, I could probably guess what you're thinking. It's okay. We're doing fine on our own. Really."

Sam had lifted his head. He shook his head, "What do you mean? Is she…?"

Clarissa looked at the little girl who smiled at her. Sam couldn't help see a dimple showing.

"She is, isn't she," Sam finally guessed.

She nodded and looked at Sam. "You don't need to do anything, honest. I remember what you said, last time." Clarissa knew from the vengeful spirit hunt what Sam did for a living and how he never stayed in one place. He hadn't exactly been nice about it, though. But, Sam really did have an excuse for that. He didn't have a soul.

He looked at the ground, again. "Yeah, about last time. I wasn't myself, back then. I'm sorry for the way I acted. I had some issues I needed to work out. But, I'm not that way anymore, and…"

Clarissa shifted the little girl in her arms. "And?"

Sam lifted his gaze. "If she is...mine. I can't just walk away from that."

"It's okay. Really, Sam. You don't have to feel obligated."

"Actually, I do. I'm...a dad." Sam took a deep breath in. Never thought the guy would ever say something like that. "I just lost my brother. And, now, I learn I still have family," he shrugged, "I can't walk away from that."

Clarissa couldn't help smile. "You do seem different from the last time I saw you." She turned to the little girl. "Micah, do you know who this is?"

Micah looked over at Sam. "He save me from car," she replied, happily.

Sam smiled.

"Yes, and do you know what else?"

She shook her head at her mother.

"This is Mommy's friend from before you were born, and also, your daddy."

That piqued the little girl's attention. "Daddy?" She looked over at the tall man who had saved her.

Sam pulled his hands out of his pockets and held them out, offering to hold her. To his surprise, Micah held her own small hands out to him. He took a hold of his daughter, under her armpits, and placed her on his side, holding an arm under her bottom, to support her in his arms.

With a better look, Sam could see Micah had his brown eyes and even his nose. Her brown hair was short, but long enough to droop over her ears. "Hi, Micah. It's great to meet you."

"Hi, fart face," the little girl replied, with a devilish smirk.

Clarissa sighed, dropping her face in her hand. "Micah Rose," she scolded, tirelessly.

"You are, definitely, your uncle Dean's niece," Sam couldn't help snicker, noticing she had Dean's half smile along with Sam's dimples. "Are you giving your mom, trouble?"

"Nooo," Micah shook her head, extending her tone on 'no.'

"Micah, what have I said about lying?" Clarissa couldn't help, smile.

Micah giggled, lowering her head.

Sam looked over at Clarissa, "I was just about to grab a bite to eat. Can I treat you both to lunch?"

"Me-Donalds!"

"Micah, you had McDonalds, yesterday," Clarissa reminded her daughter. "You don't have to do that, Sam."

"I know but I want to," he nodded. "Please?"

Clarissa gave in. "Okay. But, no McDonalds." Micah was still chanting it, over and over.

Sam got an idea. "Hey. You like dogs, Mic?" he asked of the little girl. That quieted her, down.

"Yeah!" she nodded, excited. "Doggie."

"Want to meet my dog, Riot?"

Micah nodded, over and over. "Doggie. Doggie."

Sam carried Micah over to the Impala, to the driver's side. "Come, Riot," he called over to the dog, who immediately stood up and moved over to the window. Sam petted him on the head, "Mic, this is Riot." He showed the little girl how to introduce herself to an animal, letting Riot sniff her hand before Sam gave the okay to pet him. Riot was very gentle with the little girl, too.

Clarissa had followed the two over also petting Riot. "I know of an outdoor barbecue place, in town. So, you wouldn't have to leave the little guy in the car," she suggested.

"Sounds good," Sam replied.

Clarissa took Micah from him, who started fussing. She didn't want to leave her father's arms. "Daddy's not going anywhere. He's gonna follow us to the restaurant."

"Me-Donalds," Micah repeated, sounding like a broken record.

"We're not eating at McDonalds, Micah Rose. We always eat there. Let's have something different."

"No!"

Sam stepped in. "Hey. You don't tell your mom, no, Micah," he told her, firmly, but gently. He didn't realize that wasn't even half of what his daughter was capable of. He followed Clarissa there, parking next to her. Micah was still upset when Clarissa took her out of her car seat. Sam lifted his daughter into his arms, again. "Micah, can you be nice?"

"No," she argued.

"Well then, I guess no dessert after lunch."

Hearing the word, dessert, changed her face, from upset to happiness. "De-surt."

"If you want dessert, you have to behave," he told her.

Micah nodded.

"If you can't behave, no dessert. Got it?"

"Okay, Daddy." Hearing Micah call him, daddy, made Sam's heart, flutter. He hugged her, right then and there, with the arm that wasn't holding her.

Sam and Clarissa headed up to the restaurant. It looked like an old barn someone remodeled. Instead of chairs, around the tables, there were bales of hay to sit on. Micah wanted to sit by Sam. Riot leaped onto the same hay bale, and curled around behind the kid, as if protecting her.

Sam looked over at Clarissa. "I've never seen him do that, before."

"Has he been around kids?" she asked, sitting across from him.

"Not since I found him." After the waiter, who was dressed as a cowboy, took their drink orders and gave them, their menus, Sam told Clarissa how he had found Riot. She guessed maybe Riot's previous owners had kids.

Micah was coloring over her menu.

"What would you like to eat, Mic?" Sam asked, pointing to the list of kid meals. "They have chicken nuggets like McDonalds have."

"Do it come with a toy?" she asked.

"No, love," Clarissa told her.

Her lip stuck out.

"Here, want to see something cool?" Sam was removing the wrapper from Micah's straw, carefully folding it, off.

"What?"

When Sam had the wrapper off, it looked like an accordion. Dipping the straw in his water, he held it over the wrapper and let the water, drip onto it, making the wrapper come alive on the table. It unraveled like a caterpillar.

To a two-year-old, that was the most amazing thing in the world at the moment.

"Me, try."

"It's too wet, now." Sam stuck the straw in her chocolate milk. But, since Micah really wanted to try, he let her try it with his, dipping his straw in his water and handed it to her. Micah held it over the wrapper, watching as the water dropped onto it. "Good job, Mic," he praised as Micah cheered. Sam grabbed a couple napkins and cleaned up the mess.

"More. More," she said.

"No, that's enough," Sam told her.

"More!"

"Hey, what did I say about behaving?" he reminded Micah.

Micah hugged herself, pouting.

Sam offered to play Tic Tac Toe with her, on her menu, picking up the red crayon.

She picked up the blue crayon, stating, "Me, first," and drew an O in the center of the first game spot. He drew an X in the upper left space, which Micah drew an O next to her first one. Instead of blocking her on his next turn, he took the top, center space and Micah took it, winning the first game.

Sam, of course, ordered a chicken salad and after a moment, finally got Micah to choose the BBQ nuggets meal.

While Micah colored, Clarissa asked Sam what had happened to his brother which Sam told her, it was too soon to talk about and asked how she had been.

"Things have been tough, I won't lie," she admitted.

"You still work at the hospital?"

Clarissa nodded. "Still working the graveyard shift. I haven't been able to put Micah to bed since my maternity leave ended. I'd like to switch shifts, but the babysitter I have goes to school during the day. So, she can only watch Micah at night and I can't find another one who can watch her during the day."

"I can watch Micah, if you want," Sam suggested.

She looked surprised by that suggestion. "You're staying, this time?"

Sam thought on it for a brief moment and nodded. "Yeah. I am," he said. "And while I look for a job of my own, I can fit the time I'm available around that."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Sam smiled. "And, whatever you need for Micah, or anything, let me know. I want to make things, right. I promise."

"Thank you, Sam." He couldn't help see tears of relief in her eyes.

"Of course, Clarissa."