a dabble thought i had and decided to play with, especially since there aren't too many of these

r&r and enjoy ;)


It was different compared to what she was used too. For five years, she's walked this path, watching over it while she relished the rare piece this route offered. Often, she found that she lost herself from reality here. No work hammered her skull, reminding her that she was to keep an eye out for trouble, that she had recruits to train and watch over; there were no worries about dinner, bills, Serah; not even that oaf her sister seems to fawn over could touch her here. Here, her only company was the empty path, mute to people and graced by the sleepy sun as it drifted down.

She used to take this route, walking home at the end of the day. Her last few minutes of patrol before she called it a day, or so she called it. Truthfully, it really wasn't for the sake of patrolling, but more for the sheer enjoyment of the sunset turning into evening, and the view was amazing, it was also the best place to see all the stars, and listen to the world as it whispered a final goodnight. She found this a long time ago when she was sixteen, and found that hardly anyone knew of it, for the route was well hidden. It was a mere miracle that she found it. It quickly became her get away from the world. With no one ever coming here, she was alone with her thoughts, and most of the time, she didn't even think about those thoughts. Thoughts were saved for the night, the nights she merely laid in bed and thought about what she was to do and about her life. Here, there was no reason to think, just a chance to enjoy the peace and watch the evening come, allowing herself to relax for once.

But its different now.

The familiar weight of her gunblade was gone, securely waiting in a case in her room. Replaced by it, was a light weight, ivory stick that was a little less than half her height was held loosely in her hands, leaning it back as she visualized the scene before her. From her memory, she could see the colors going over the sky, changing quickly as the sun set, though to any viewer lost, it seemed like it took forever, but even still, ended to quickly.

It gave little comfort though that she had no way of knowing if anything was different. Maybe there was a bird flying across, a cloud that wasn't supposed to be there, anything that could have made it different from all the past ones she saw.

It didn't seem any different so far though. She could still feel the warmth of the fading light caress her face, soothing and comforting her in her own solitary world. She could still hear the gossip of birds, trying to get the last of their words out before they settled. She could feel the sturdy stone path she stood and walked on for five years now, still ready to carry and guide her home.

Despite all these familiars and comforts, she couldn't deny that steady stabbing pain of loneliness clawing and raking at her heart.

She never used to have a problem with being alone. Work helped occupy her, distract her as she merely focused making life better for her and Serah. But now she was having a current break from work, she was starting to get that familiar sense she tried to hard to hide from.

This must be how Serah felt. This must have been what pushed her little sister into the arms of that idiot. Indirectly, it was because she was too lost on forgetting her own solitude, that her sister, her dear little sister, found comfort and company in the arms of another, that total fool.

At least Serah was able to escape it.

For her though, it seems she was caught in solitude's clutches once again. She's aware though that it was her own fault that she was caught. She put her self in this situation. She dove for the boy, shielding him from the worst, while she took it all. It had cost her, it had cost a lot.

She didn't regret it though, especially when the said boy came, with only his words and physical contact to show how grateful and sorry he was. The boy's parents even more so.

What they offered did little to soothe the reality. And it just got worse when Amodar came and relieved her; especially since the doctors said she could be off duty completely.

It felt like someone stab her with her own gunblade then.

Serah tried making life as easy and better as she could. Everyone did.

Only Hope, Sazh, and Fang treated her the same; Serah was torn from her worry and instinct to help, to the knowledge that she didn't like thinking that she was stuck forever, and that she was useless.

She was far from useless. She could hear better than ever. She could recognize a person with their steps and breathe alone, by the Void, she could even smell and identify each person as well as a behemoth could. She could still fight, she didn't loose her grace or flow. She knew how to set her feet, how to move; Fang and her practiced, her survival instincts were even sharper, she could sense a person, feel how they shift and move in the air.

Despite what anyone thought, she wasn't useless, or helpless. She may not know where all her enemies were, or even her area, but she was far from helpless.

Far from needing someone there all the time.

It's what she pointed out to Serah. Her sister couldn't be there all the time. She accepted and knew this. She made Serah realize this. Though it placed her right in solitude's waiting claws, she didn't regret what she told Serah. She really couldn't be there all the time, especially if she really was going to start a family with that oaf.

She would get back on her feet. If she didn't recover, she find a way through and adjust to this. She lived through both the loss of her parents, raised Serah, and became a Sergeant in Guardian Corp.

She'll get through this, she be on her own two feet soon enough. All she needed was time, and patience. This phase in life would be nothing compared to all the past things in life that she had to push through. This was just another bump in the road.

Speaking of road...

She tilted her head, listening as an unfamiliar set of feet walk towards her. They were light compared to Snow, who stomped his way around, always on the move, never looking where he was going. But these steps were also heavier than Hope, whose steps were light and almost cautious, though it always had an easy gait to her ears.

No, these steps were slow, steady, and set in a constant rhythm, almost melodious, and despite the easy pace, she could hear that they fell heavily to the ground.

She sighed quietly to herself.

Looks like a depressed person found her little route.

She listened and waited, the air now cool as the sun was gone, and the birds around hushed, with only the stranger's steps breaking it. The steps came to where she stood, overseeing the now fresh night. The person stopped next to her, and she felt eyes going over her form. She didn't turn to meet them, or even acknowledge the person next to her. She wouldn't say anything, this person was the one that came up to her spot, they had more right to speak than her, especially since they were standing right next to her.

The eyes drifted off her and she guessed they swept over the area her own were looking over. "A bit lonely out here, isn't it?" the person asked, a smooth and slightly husky masculine voice. Her head unconsciously tilted to hear it better. Easily, she replied, "Depends on what you call lonely."

He hummed thoughtfully. "I didn't think there was more than one definition of lonely," he admits.

"Everything always has more than one definition, just like every question has more than one answer," she stated.

She could hear the smile in this thoughtful hum. A little eagerly, he asked, "Come here often?"

"For five years."

"Mind sharing?"

She shrugged, neither encouraging nor discouraging him. She didn't care.

"Why did you come here?" he asked, leaving her side to approach the edge of the railing, over looking Bodhum.

"To forget life," she answered.

She heard his muffled, tired laugh, most to himself. "I could use that, forget life. Dad's being ridiculous."

So another man in her life that has daddy issues. She sighed at this fact. Humoring him though, she asked, "How so?"

"He's going through a period in life where he thinks he's going to die the next day, and is worried that he won't see his grandchildren, never see me take over the... family business," he answered stiffly.

"So he's ready for you to settle down?" she guessed.

"Pretty much," he confirmed. "And truthfully, I did have a girl in mind, but... well, truthfully, she's more like a sister if anything, plus, she's going out with my friend so..."

She turned her head in his direction, amused as she listened to him ramble. His father was a sore spot, much like it was for Hope. She found it was funny, listening to this random stranger rant about his life to her, especially since he didn't know her at all. But she did like the sound of his voice, it helped her get through the rant.

"...and she sort of killed any romantic interest when she barfed in my lunchbox in third grade. I might have had a crush on her for a while, but I'm no longer trusting her anywhere near my lunchbox, for a while anyway," he chuckled.

"You're lucky," she stated.

"Hm?" he glanced over at her.

"Your lucky to have such friends around, even from childhood."

"It is sad when you break away from those first friends," he agreed.

She hummed her own thoughtfully. She blinked through when she felt her pocket vibrate as her cell tickled her side. Serah was summoning her. The man also noticed, glancing over at her.

"Boyfriend?" he asked.

"Sister," she corrected, not even bothering to heck and answer. She knew well enough it was Serah calling, worrying about where she was. She was merely a ten minute walk away.

"Well, you should bring him here sometime, this place is nice," he said.

"I've never had a boyfriend, and I doubt I'll ever will," she stated flatly as she turned away, heading home. She felt his surprised gaze turn to her, and she bet it was even more so when he saw her walking along, tapping her white stick along the way loosely. She heard his steps rush over to her side. She felt his hand lightly touch her shoulder and gently turning her to face him. She felt him go tense, just a little as he stared into her eyes.

Her clouded eyes.

He didn't breath a word to her, and she offered nothing to him. And the silence between went on till Serah phoned again.

She decided that this evening was done then. She was not about to hear another apology, especially from a stranger, she wasn't going to take another offer of help, especially when she didn't need it. And she certainly didn't want his pity. She turned away from him, walking off just as before.

She wasn't surprised when she heard his steps following her. She was sure he was doing this out of pity now that he found out about her eyes. Walk a blind person home, always helps with the unneeded pity about it. At least he wasn't guiding her or offering her apologies, that made it a bit more bearable.

When they reached her home, she felt him pause, staring up at her home. Even without her sight, she knew Serah was in there, pacing back in forth, phone clutched tightly in her hand. She glanced his way from over her shoulder, saying, "This is where we part."

"I'll see you then, back on that route?" he asked, his voice unsteady and unsure.

She merely hummed. It was a maybe. "Have a goodnight," she bid.

"Wait," he said, catching her shoulder once again. She paused, feeling the warmth of his hand against her skin. She turned her head his way, waiting impatiently for him to say or do something. "I..." he started, then he cleared his throat, shyly letting her shoulder go as she listened to him shuffle around unsteadily. "I'm Noctis, and I... thank you, just for, hearing me out, you know?"

It was funny by how confident he sounded when he first appeared. Now he sounded like a child asking his mother for ice cream even though he knew she was going to say no. When she felt his gaze on her again, she gave him another neutral shrug. "No problem," she stated simply, "I'll see you at that route, Noctis."

"Can I have your name?" he asked, before she could disappear into her own home.

"Lightning," she answered as she walked away on the familiar steps up to her own familiar house.

She felt his eyes following her the whole way.

Just as she reached the door, she 'looked' back at him.

She'd probably hear him again, on the route with her open ears, while her clouded eyes roamed his way.

But sometime, she'll see him, with clear eyes.