Title: How to Get Rid of a Psycho Nanny
Author: Hales luvs Nate
Pairing/Character(s): Naley duh!!
Rating: Strict T for language
Disclaimer: If I owned One Tree Hill, do you think I would be writing a story to get rid of a psycho bitch slut; no, there would be way more fluff. I don't own the challenge, but I wrote the story.
Spoilers/Warnings: "Night!" Nathan and Haley said as they looked into each other eyes, and they leaned in and kissed each other
Summary: One Shot Fluffish Naley The only way to get rid of a psycho bitch is through another psycho bitch!
Author's Notes: This is for the Get Rid of Carrie challenge by PrettyGirl27. I guess Mark is doing his job, because he wants us to get worked up.
----23----
Haley walked in her kitchen to fix her a cup of coffee to settle her exhaustion.
"Morning, Haley!" Carrie said very chipper.
"Morning!" said a half asleep Haley with a yawn.
"Why are you still in your jamies? Shouldn't you be leaving soon?" Carrie asked as she set down a plate of eggs and bacon and gave her a cup of coffee.
Haley took a sip of her coffee and said, "Mm, the seniors are taking a field trip to Charlotte with their government class, so Turner told me I could take the day off!"
"Oh, ok, but why did Nathan leave?" Carrie asked.
"Varsity has whatever age is good, so he is going to stick with the rest of the team, but he'll be home later," Haley said as she gave her a fake smile.
"I better go get Jaime ready," Carrie said, but Haley stopped her.
"Actually, I am taking the whole day off from work, but I want to a mom today, so I want you to take the day off, and go out and go shopping or go get a mani and pedi, and just enjoy it," Haley said with a smile.
"Are you sure?" Carrie asked.
"It feels like I haven't been home in forever, and I want to spend the day with my husband and son, so go and have fun," Haley said.
"K, I'm going to change and leave," Carrie said as she left to her room.
Carrie came back out and said, "Thank you, Haley!"
"You have fun today!" Haley said with a big fake smile.
"I will. Thanks!" Carrie said as she went out the door.
"Not!" Haley said as she finished her coffee.
Jaime started to walk down the stairs, and he saw his mommy, and he had a bright smile on his face. "Mama!"
"Morning, Jim Jam!" Haley said as she got down from the chair and gave her son a big hug.
"Where's Nanny Carrie?" Jaime asked as he pulled from her and climbed the bar chair.
"I gave her the day off. Today, mama has the day off too, so I thought after you get out of preschool; you and I can spend time together! How does that sound?" Haley asked.
"Yay! I've missed you, mama!" Jaime said as he ate his breakfast.
"I've missed you so much!" Haley said as she gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Finish your breakfast; then we got to get you to preschool!"
"Ok!" Jaime said.
"I'll be right back. I have to go change!" Haley said as she went to her and Nathan's bedroom.
----23----
Haley started to go to her next location after dropping off Jaime. Haley was wearing a black skirt that went above her knees, and a bikini strap red shirt that cut about her cleavage, and she'd knew that Nathan would love it, and it had I Love My Man written in bold black font on the front. She had her chestnut locks naturally down. She stepped in her husband and best friend's second home.
"Come on, guys, faster!" said the voice that she loved to hear. "Why are slowing down, and what are you looking at?" he said as he turned around, and he saw a pleasant surprise.
"Hey, baby!" Haley said, and they walked towards each other and into each other's arms.
"What are you doing here?" Nathan asked.
"The chance to miss you all hot, sweaty, and in charge. I didn't want to miss this sight!" Haley said in his ear.
Nathan smirked and said, "Oh, really, and you have to look like that?" Nathan said.
"Like what?" Haley asked.
"Like a really hot mama that I want to take on the floor, here, and now!" Nathan said huskily in her ear, so no one would hear, and Haley blushed, and he kissed her, and the boys started to ooh.
"Alright, alright, just for that more suicides now!" Nathan said.
He turned back to Haley, and she said, "We'll finish this later!"
"Oh, fuck yes, we will!" He said then gave her kiss on the forehead.
"Love you!" Haley said.
"I love you, too!" Nathan said as he let her go, and she left.
----23----
Haley arrived at her home, and she grabbed the phone and lounged on the couch, and she called a number that she knew could help her.
"Hello?" the voice said.
"Hey, Slut!" Haley said.
"Hey, Skank!" the voice replied.
"Bitch!" Haley said.
"Hoe!" said the voice.
"No, no, my dear sister, I believe that is you!" Haley said, and they both laughed.
"How are you, baby sis?" Taylor asked.
"I'm better than I was six months ago," Haley said.
"Yeah, I heard about that. John and I are really sorry we didn't call you. We figured you be stressed out as it was," Taylor said.
"It's ok, Tay, but I need your help," Haley said.
"What's up, Hay?" Taylor asked.
"I kinda hired a hot nanny for Jamie," Haley said and was interrupted by Taylor.
"Haley, you are the smart one. Why the hell would you hire a fucking hot nanny?" Taylor asked.
"She was really great when we first met her, but now, she's a little bitch," Haley whined.
"What did the hoe do?" Taylor asked.
"She's been flirting a lot with Nathan. He told me a couple weeks back that she was flirting and that he was accidentally doing it too, and when she was drunk, she admitted to ex-wives, and Lucas's fiancé was told by the slut that 'Just because people have history doesn't mean that they should be together.' That is a total double meaning to that; she meant about me and Nathan. Tay, I hate her, and I can't get rid of her because Jamie loves her. Tay, what the hell do I do? I need to get in that old brain of yours. You know the one when you were a psycho bitch," Haley complained.
"Ok, Hales, I have an idea," Taylor said.
"Bring it!" Haley said.
"You ready? Ok, this is what you do…" Taylor said.
----23----
Haley had gotten Jamie, and now, they were at home watching a Scooby Doo marathon and coloring.
"Scooby Dooby Doo!" Jamie and Haley said together and laughed.
"So what are you drawing, Jim Jam?" Haley asked after she finished laughing.
"I'm drawing you, mama!" Jamie said as he was drawing her hair in.
"Jamie, I'm sorry I haven't been really home in a while," Haley said.
"It's ok, mama," Jamie said.
"No, it's not. I promise to be home more! I love you, Jamie!" Haley said.
"I love you too, mama!" Jamie said as he got up and hugged his mama.
They were hugging till they heard the door open. "Hales? Jamie? Where are you?" Nathan asked.
"In the bedroom, Nate!" Haley shouted.
"Hi!" Nathan said.
"Hi, daddy!" Jamie said as he went and hugged him.
"How was your day, Jamie?" Nathan asked.
"It was great! We got to be outside extra long today, and mama and I colored while watching Scooby!"
"That's awesome, Jamie!" Nathan said, and Jamie went back to his coloring.
Nathan walked over to his wife, and he pulled her in his arms. "How was your day, baby?"
"It was really great. I saw you looking hot on the sidelines, I talked to Taylor, and I had a great afternoon with Jamie! How was your day?" Haley asked.
"It was great. I saw you at practice wearing this shirt that makes you look so hot, and the guys were doing great at practice," Nathan said.
"Hales, I've missed you!" Nathan said sincerely.
"I've missed you too so much!" Haley said as she leaned up, and she gave him a kiss, and he kissed her back.
----23----
Carrie came home, and she saw Haley and Nathan drinking coffee and eating pie at the table.
"Hi, everyone!" Carrie said.
"Oh, hi, Carrie," Haley said.
"Have you been having a good night?" Carrie asked.
"It's been perfect," Nathan said as he smiled at his wife, and he leaned over and gave her a kiss.
Be more affectionate in front of Carrie and not in front of her. Show her how much you love each other, and have he's mine, bitch, stamped on the back of your head!
Haley remembered Taylor's words, and she definitely liked them. Haley gave in to the kiss, and when they pulled away, Carrie's smile disappeared.
"How was your day?" Haley asked.
"It was really good. Thanks for the day off. I promise to come back tomorrow," Carrie said.
"K, but we aren't going to need you to do those many hours. I've really missed Jamie and Nathan, and Mia's record is just about done, so soon, you are no longer needed during the nights," Haley said, and soon, you are no longer needed at all.
"K, night, everyone!" Carrie said.
"Night!" Nathan and Haley said as they looked into each other eyes, and they leaned in and kissed each other.
Carrie left with a disgusted look on her face.
"I've missed this!" Haley said.
"Me too!" Nathan said as he leaned in and kissed her again, and she happily kissed him back, and they started into a big make-out session.
Nathan started to pull her into his lap, and she pulled away and said, "I don't want to hurt you."
"You won't!" Nathan said as he pulled her onto his lap, and he kissed her, and she happily kissed him back. Their make-out session got even heavier, and he touched her lips with his tongue, and she happily opened her mouth for entrance. Both their tongues were battling for dominance, and they stayed till air became a matter.
"Do you want to finish this upstairs?" Nathan asked.
"Hell, yes!" Haley said as she got off his lap, and she took his hand as they went to their bedroom and had a blissful night.
----23----
Haley and Nathan woke up in each other's arms, and they still had the biggest smile on their face that they had from the end of their great night.
"Morning, Beautiful!" Nathan said.
"Morning!" Haley said as reached up and gave him a kiss, and he kissed her back.
"What time is it?" Haley asked.
"It's six thirty," Nathan replied.
"Ugh, I better get ready," Haley said as she got out of bed. She was about to walk in their bathroom, but she turned around and asked, "Wanna join me?" And Nathan got out the bed faster than you could say fuck yess, and Haley giggled.
----23----
Nathan got dressed first, and he went in the kitchen with a huge smirk on his face.
"What's with the smirk?" Carrie asked as she set down his breakfast.
"Nothing!" Nathan said as he still had the bright "I just got laid smirk" on his face as he ate his breakfast.
Haley entered the room with a bright smile and singing a familiar song, "L is for the way you look at me. O is for the only one I see. V is very, very extraordinary, E is even more than anyone that you adore in love!"
Haley went over to Nathan and gave him a sweet kiss on the lips. "Morning, baby, again!"
"Morning, Hales" He said and then he kissed her.
"Oh, morning, Carrie. Where's my other baby?" Haley asked.
"I was just going to let him sleep in," Carrie said as she set down Haley's food and coffee.
"Thank you," Haley said with a fake smile.
"So did you have a good day off?" Nathan asked.
"Yeah, I actually met someone," Carrie said with a smile.
"Really? What's he like?" Haley asked.
"Hot as hell, funny, kind, and did I mention hot as hell!" Carrie said with a smile. "His name's Felix, and he's only in town for a few weeks. Is it ok if he comes over today?"
"Yeah, just keep the PDA to a strict minimal, and tell him no cursing in front of Jamie, and just make sure to hold the PDA," Haley said.
"Got it!" Carrie said.
"Ok, I'm going to go kiss Jamie, and then we can go ok?" Haley asked.
"Yeah, that's fine," Nathan said. Haley leaned over and gave him a sweet kiss, and he kissed her back, and she left to kiss her other baby.
"I thought today was your day off," Carrie said.
"No, I just decided not to show up, but Haley's still having problems with her students, and she wants me to tell them about their future," Nathan said.
"I'm ready, Nate!" Haley said.
"K," He said. "Bye," He said to Carrie.
They went out the door, and Carrie just grunted.
----23----
A few days later…
Carrie walked in the kitchen after leaving Haley and Nathan alone together, and she found them kissing for the fifth time that morning.
A few days later…
Carrie was sitting on the couch watching tv , and Haley was sitting right beside her, and Nathan walked in the livingroom, and he went over to Haley and gave her a hot kiss, and after he pulled back, he and Haley disappeared to their bedroom for few minutes.
The next week after that, Carrie had walked in on, sat in on, and everything in between with the happy couple making out.
----23----
Two weeks later….
Haley was home way more often, and she and Nathan were as affectionate as they used to be. They were back in honeymoon land again.
Flashback
"Maybe, we should start unpacking," Haley said as they lay in bed.
"We've been a little busy doing a little of this (kiss) and this (kiss) and this (kiss). So much funner than unpacking," He said and kissed her.
"Unpacking can definitely wait!" Haley said as she turned them over and strattled him. She leaned and kissed him, and he immediately kissed her hard and fast, and he put his tongue across her lips, and she happily opened her mouth, and they finished kissing and making love hours later.
End Flashback
Haley entered the kitchen and said, "Morning, Hubby!" And she went over to him and kissed him.
"Morning, Wifey!" Nathan said after they pulled apart.
"Well, aren't you the two the cheesy couple!" said a voice from behind.
"Shut up, Tay!" Haley said, and she kissed her husband again.
"Yeah, baby, shut up!" John said as he got behind his wife and put his arms around her and kissed her cheek.
"So where's the hoe?" Taylor asked in her husband's arms.
"I don't know, and don't care!" Haley said with a proud smirk. "Thank you, Taylor!"
"Your welcome!" Taylor said with a smile.
Flashback
"Honey, I'm home!" shouted a voice.
"Who the hell are you?" asked Carrie.
"I could ask you the same question!" said the voice.
"I'm the nanny.Who the hell are you?" Carrie said.
"Nope, that's my job now!" Said the girl.
"Haley? You have a guest!" Carrie shouted.
Haley walked in the hallway, and she smirked, and she put the fakest act on, "Oh my gosh, Carrie, I'm so sorry! I meant to do this before she came."
"What the hell is going on?" Carrie asked.
"Um, since I've been home, I don't really need you anymore," Haley said with a smirky smile.
"You can't be fucking serious!" Carrie said.
"As a fucking heart attack!" Haley said.
"But what about Jamie? He adores me!" Carrie said.
"Lately, he said you creeped him out when you told MY kid that you thought he was your kid. He's MY fucking kid, and he loves his Aunt Tay way more. This is my sister, Taylor, and all she needs is a place to stay, and she won't flirt with MY husband. He's MY fucking husband not yours, bitch. You have an hour to clear out your shit before I call the cops," Haley said, and left her at the door with her mouth to the floor.
End Flashback
"I knew the only way to get rid of a psycho bitch was to use an old one! No offence!" Haley said.
"None taken!" Taylor said. "So what are you going to do about a sitter?"
"Junk and Fergie are going to do it. They need a little cash, and we have all the games and food they need. They were thrilled to take the job, and Jamie was even more excited when he found out. He loves his Uncles," Haley said with a smile as Nathan pulled her in his arms.
"And I don't have to worry about some bitch taking my husband, and" Haley said.
"And I don't have to worry about some guy either," Nathan said as he kissed her temple.
"Ok, we will leave you two to it," Taylor said as she and Jack went back to their room.
Haley turned around and said, "I love you, Nate!"
"And I love you, Hales! Always!" Nathan said.
"And forever!" Haley finished, and she pulled him in for a hot, passionate, love-filled kiss which definitely led to more.
----23----
A/n: So like it? Hate it? This took forever long to do, so you better review!! Jk please review everyone it will make me so happy. You have no idea!! We definitely had some drama on the show, but we definitely need more fluff!
