Disclaimer: Ginny and her hormone-induced emotions belong to JK Rowling et al. Includes lyrics from White Flag which belong to Dido (and a couple of blokes called Rock Nowels and Rollo Armstrong, apparently).
Summary: Ever wondered what on Earth Ginny was thinking when she sent the Pickled Toad Poem? This fic follows Ginny's changing emotions from CoS to OotP. (A ship song fic: Dido's White Flag in the blackground.)
The sinking of the good ship Harry/Ginny.
Ginny glanced down the table towards Harry at lunchtime. He was talking to Ron and Hermione, laughing occasionally and pushing his messy black hair from his gorgeous, deep green eyes. Ginny sighed. She couldn't eat; in fact, she couldn't even think of eating. This was quite possibly one of the most important things she had ever done in the entire eleven years of her life. Today she was going to tell Harry how she felt; how her stomach flipped every time she saw him and she became a bag of nerves, how she thought he was the bravest person she'd ever met, and how irresistibly handsome he was.
But then, he already knew that she became a bag of nerves around him. And blushed (as only a Weasley could). And spilt her cereal. And put her elbow in the butter... He never said anything of course, never teased her like brothers did; Harry was a gentleman.
Thinking about it, he was modest too - from what she had managed to learn about him, he probably didn't think he deserved the attention. Ginny felt a moment of self doubt. Maybe he wasn't a gentleman - maybe he was just ignoring her and hoping she'd get bored of him? Ginny looked down at the piece of parchment she was writing on. No, he was just shy; he probably thought he wasn't worthy of the attention. Today Ginny was going to tell him that he most certainly was worthy of it. She added a final line to her poem but didn't sign it. She was confident Harry would know who it was from.
I know you think that I shouldn't still love you
Or tell you that
But if I didn't say it, well I'd still have felt it
Where's the sense in that?
Later that day, as she waited outside the DADA classroom, Ginny noticed Harry coming down the corridor towards her. Her heart skipped a beat as she wondered if he'd received it yet. Would he say something to her? Maybe he'd kiss her? Ginny's whole body coursed with excitement at the thought of it. No, maybe that was too much to hope for. Besides, he'd be too shy, especially in a corridor full of students. But she was sure that he'd speak to her and that was a good start.
As he got closer Ginny tried to concentrate on not blushing. She could do that - Ginny felt she'd grown up a lot since the summer. She'd just about managed to stop knocking things over in Harry's presence. Admittedly, she still stammered whenever he was near and turned a bright shade of red if his eyes ever wandered in her general direction, but (as her mother had once told her) a bit of blushing wasn't so bad. Yeah right, it was just mildly mortifying.
Suddenly, a surly looking dwarf ran up behind Harry.
"Are you Harry Potter?" it shouted, kicking people's shins to make his
way through the crowds.
This wasn't meant to happen - not in front of all these people. Sure enough, Ginny saw
that Harry had turned bright red and was trying to escape. The dwarf caught him
though.
"I've got a musical message for Harry Potter," said the dwarf, brandishing
his harp.
Musical? Ginny thought, horrified. Wait, there had to be a mistake. She hadn't intended
for her poem to be read aloud, let alone sung. Was it too late to stop it? If she did,
everyone would know that she'd sent him a Valentine, but at least they wouldn't hear
the words that she'd penned for Harry, and Harry alone...
Ginny got a grip on herself. Don't be stupid, she told herself, Harry's probably received hundreds - or at least tens - of messages today. This wasn't hers. By this time everyone was watching, all eyes focussed on Harry. Percy had shown up and so had Draco Malfoy. Poor Harry, Ginny thought. Whoever had sent him this singing Valentine really should have known better.
The dwarf started singing and Ginny stopped breathing, an intense panic filling her. It was like time had suddenly ground to a crawl and she was seeing the scene in front of her in slow motion so that she had the opportunity to take it all in - the look of pure embarrassment on Harry's face, the ringing sound of girls giggling, the words floating through the corridor. It was her poem - the one she had written for only Harry to read - and it was being sung by a dwarf in front of a crowd of laughing students, including Draco Malfoy... What had she done?
I promise I'm not trying to make your life harder
Or return to where we were
That night, Ginny wept into her pillow, incapable of stopping herself and indifferent to the fact that her dorm-mates could hear her. She cried for many things, amongst them the fact that none of the girls around her would ask if she was okay. But that wasn't important at the moment - the predominant thought in her head was Harry. How had it all gone so horribly wrong? She'd wanted to tell him how wonderful he was and had ended up humiliating him. Maybe this was a sign; fate telling her to give up? Ginny let out a particularly loud sob. She could no more forget about Harry than she could survive without her heart, she though dramatically. She was lost to him, no matter what.
I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag upon my door
I'm in love and always will be
* * *
The heat was sweltering so Ginny found a spot of shade and sat down. It was so unfair. They were finally able to visit Bill in Egypt, thanks to a win on the Daily Prophet Lottery, and Ginny was forced to wait outside whilst her parents and brothers visited the most interesting tombs. Even Ron, who was only a year older and couldn't produce anything nearly as strong as her Bat-bogey curse, was allowed in. Before, she would have put this down to blatant sexism but now there was no doubt that it was because of what had happened at school the previous year. Just as she had thought that she was going to be treated the same as her brothers, she had to go and be possessed by the most evil wizard alive! (Or almost alive, if the rumours were true.)
Ginny sighed and took her eyes off her sandy surroundings to look at the International Edition of the Daily Prophet in her hands. There they were; the Weasley family, on the front page of the paper. If only their dear readers knew... Ginny remembered Ron had said he was going to cut out the article to send to Harry and she found her mind wandering, as it often did, to her brother's best friend.
As with just about everything else, her situation with him too had worsened. Ginny felt positively ill at the thought of it. She'd almost got him killed. He'd had to face a younger incarnation of the wizard who had made him an orphan and battle a huge, ugly snake. Not only that, but half of the school had suspected him of Petrifying his fellow students. It really didn't get much worse than that. Ginny assumed that these things were what Harry would see every time he looked at her from now on. He should hate her but Ginny knew that he was too kind and understanding for that. He wouldn't hate her... but he would never love her; that much was obvious now and it made her feel wretched. She was a link to his painful past; a constant reminder of the parents he had never known.
I know I left too much mess and
Destruction to come back again
And I cause nothing but trouble
I understand if you can't talk to me again
* * *
Ginny's initial excitement at hearing of the Yule Ball had recently all but vanished. She acknowledged that it had been optimistic of her to hope that Harry might ask her to accompany him, even as a friend, or as his friend's little sister. But she hadn't been prepared for the almost constant glances that he now shot at a certain Ravenclaw girl; a very pretty Ravenclaw girl two years older than Ginny with perfect, sleek, shiny black hair who played Seeker in her house Quidditch team... Ginny couldn't even hope to compete.
She heard the excited chatter of the other Gryffindor girls and made a decision. It had gone on long enough; it was time for her to start thinking more realistically. Harry was never going to sweep her off her feet and declare his love for her - he barely even noticed her. She was going to forget about him. There were plenty of other boys at Hogwarts and she wasn't so awful that at least one of them wouldn't be attracted to her. No more pining after Harry. It was over. Finished. Done with. That's what she decided. Neville asked Ginny to the Ball and she felt quite proud of herself... until she found out that Cho had said no.
And if you live by the rules of 'it's over'
Then I'm sure that that makes sense.
* * *
Ginny was nervous. She had her last exam this morning (Transfiguration), but that wasn't the reason for the butterflies in her stomach. Today was also the day of the third and final task in the Tri-Wizard Tournament. Admittedly, this time wasn't as bad as the first. When Ginny had seen the dragons she'd almost fainted and if it hadn't been for Ron's reassurances that Charlie wouldn't let anything happen to Harry, she didn't think she would have been able to watch.
The second task had taken place underwater so no-one in the stands had any idea what the champions were up against. With Ron and Hermione acting as hostages, Ginny had found herself sitting next to Luna Lovegood, who had told such wild stories about what was lurking in the depths of the lake that Ginny had concentrated on not laughing and almost forgotten that her brother and his friends could be in danger.
At least this time Harry was prepared. Ginny had often seen him returning to the Common Room late in the evening, having spent hours practising. She was sure that he would be able to deal with whatever he had to face, although her head didn't seem to have told her insides this fact.
Ginny finished her breakfast and left the Great Hall intending to flick through her
notes one last time before her exam. As soon as she'd gone through the doors though,
she heard someone call to her.
"Ginny?"
She turned round and saw Michael Corner coming towards her.
"Oh, hi."
"Hi." He seemed nervous.
"Last exam this morning," Ginny said.
"What? Oh. Yes, last exam... Erm, I was wondering if... if you wanted to sit with me to
watch the last task?" He looked even more nervous and was blushing ever so slightly.
Ginny couldn't quite believe her ears. Michael Corner - interesting,
Quidditch-appreciating, mildly handsome Michael Corner - was asking her out! She'd
never been asked out before. She'd gone to the Yule Ball with Neville, but that was
only because Hermione had turned him down.
Ginny smiled. "I'd like that."
Michael smiled back. He had quite a nice smile really. He should smile more often.
"Right, well, I'll meet you after lunch then?"
Ginny nodded and watched as he walked away.
"Ginny, what are you doing?" Colin asked from behind her. "The exam starts in two
minutes."
She followed him as he scurried down the corridor, not really listening as
he waffled on about his revision... She had a date. Ginny couldn't stop the
excitement rising inside her. How ironic that it was to watch Harry... Well, Harry and
the other Champions, Ginny corrected herself, but it was too late; an image of Harry
had already popped into her head. Michael's dark hair was a bit like Harry's, except
that Harry's was messier - especially that bit at the back that stuck up at a funny
angle... Damn, Ginny thought and she made a conscious effort to picture Michael.
"Miss Weasley?"
Ginny looked up and found that everyone else had entered the Transfiguration
classroom.
"Will you be joining us today?" Professor McGonagall asked. Ginny hurried to take
her seat.
The Tranfiguration exam didn't go as well as her Charms one the day before, but as Charms was her best subject, she didn't think she'd done too badly. Ginny was pleasantly surprised at lunchtime to find her mum and Bill had come to Hogwarts to watch the final task, but was glad when Fred and George announced they were going to watch with the rest of the sixth years during the task as it gave her an excuse to remain in the Great Hall when her family finally left for the Quidditch pitch.
Ginny felt her heart rate rise as she saw Michael approach the Gryffindor table.
"Hi. Are you ready to go?" he asked.
Ginny nodded, abandoning the last mouthful of her rhubarb pie, and stood up. Together,
they went out into the late sunshine and started walking towards the Quidditch pitch,
making slightly nervous conversation.
Halfway across Hogwarts' lawn Ginny felt something against her hand and couldn't stop herself from looking down. Her hand was in Michael's. Ginny looked up again quickly and tried to control the smile that was tugging at the edges of her mouth.
They took their seats, still holding hands and Ginny surveyed the pitch. It was barely recognisable as the place where she had spent so many hours watching Quidditch, as the entire area had been transformed into a sort of giant maze. Despite the height of the stands, the six metre high hedges and descending night sky meant that they couldn't really see much of what was inside the maze.
"So who are you supporting?" Michael asked.
"Harry, of course," Ginny said automatically, "I mean he's in my house so..."
"Well I'll support him too then," Michael said, unaware of the slightly uncomfortable
feeling Ginny was experiencing.
She didn't have a chance to reply as Ludo Bagman had started to remind the audience
of the Champions' current rankings. A whistle blew and the third task began.
* * *
Confusion reigned. From where she was, Ginny saw the two bodies appear. One of them
looked far too familiar. Harry was laying face down on the grass, not moving. Ginny
stood up, not noticing that she'd dropped Michael's hand.
"Harry?" she murmured as she felt all the breath in her disappear. People had crowded
round, obscuring her view.
"He's dead," she heard someone say. "He's dead."
Oh God, no. Ginny's legs felt like jelly but somehow they transported her down the
steps to the pitch-side and through the crowd that had gathered. Her heart pounded in
her ears. It couldn't be. He couldn't be dead. She loved him too much for him to be
dead.
"Cedric's dead," someone said. Ginny stopped in her tracks and wiped her face, trying
desperately to dry her eyes enough to see.
"Harry, let go," she heard Dumbledore say. Ginny collapsed onto the grass with relief.
I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag upon my door
I'm in love and always will be
Understandably, there was a shadow over Hogwarts during the last week of term. The Hufflepuff students, especially those in the seventh year, moved around the school in small huddles, comforting each other. Ginny's relief at discovering that Harry would make a full recovery was marred by the news that Ron had broken to her; Voldemort - Tom Riddle - was back.
Ginny didn't have any more dates with Michael but just as the Hogwarts Express was
pulling into King's Cross he asked to speak to her.
"I wanted to give you this," he said holding out a piece of parchment. "It's my
address. I'd like it if... I mean, if you want to... Will you write to me over the
summer?"
Ginny took the parchment, their fingers touching briefly. "Of course."
Michael looked at the floor, nervously brushing his foot over the grey carpet beneath
him before looking up again. He appeared to be in two minds over something then,
seemingly making a decision, he took a step closer. Ginny swallowed. He wasn't going
to...? Michael was looking right at her and she didn't look away. He hesitated a
second then leaned forward and kissed her.
It was over in an instant; Ginny had hardly felt the pressure on her lips when it
ended.
"So I'll see you in September then?" Michael asked quickly.
"I'll write," Ginny said smiling at him.
He smiled back and nodded before turning to rejoin his friends.
Once he was out of sight Ginny grinned. Michael had just kissed her! It wasn't quite how she'd imagined and it certainly wasn't with the person she'd imagined it would be with, but it was her first kiss... She carefully folded the piece of parchment and put it in her pocket.
Ginny said goodbye to her friends and crossed the barrier to hug her mother. Ron and
the twins were already there.
"Have Hermione and Harry left already?" Ginny asked.
Ron nodded. "You just missed them. What kept you?"
"I was saying goodbye to some people," Ginny said, ensuring she didn't smile. She had
no intention of being teased all summer.
"Well never mind, you'll see them over the holidays. Come on, get a move on," her
mother said.
"Are they allowed to come to The Burrow then?" Ron asked enthusiastically.
"Well, actually dear we won't be at The Burrow," Mrs Weasley said quietly.
"Where will we be then?" asked George.
Ginny's mother refused to say anything more throughout the whole journey and by
the time the group arrived at their destination Ginny was buzzing with excitement.
It was quite a shock to meet Harry's godfather and Ginny realised that there were still so many unexpected things to discover about Harry. This latest discovery cleared up a lot of questions Ginny'd had circling in the back of her mind though. Ron filled her in on the year when Sirius had supposedly been after Harry and Scabbers had mysteriously vanished.
On the whole, Ginny didn't mind spending the summer at Grimmauld Place; there was always something going on or something to be done. Ron's arachnophobia and the abundance of spiders didn't hurt either. The only time she wished he was at home was when it was announced that the Weasley children wouldn't be allowed to send any owls as it would be too conspicuous in the middle of a Muggle neighbourhood.
Ginny protested; she couldn't just not write to people she had promised to keep in contact with. She managed to persuade her mother that one owl each, in the dead of night, couldn't hurt. Ginny sent a letter to Michael explaining that, as much as she wanted to, she couldn't write to him. All hopes of getting to know him better over the summer were dashed; now she would have to wait until September.
* * *
Ginny daydreamed all the way to the station. Lupin and the twins were discussing some statue on the third floor at Hogwarts but she wasn't listening. She was picturing her reunion with Michael (who, in her daydream, was slightly taller than in real life), when he would undoubtedly sweep her off her feet and kiss her again.
They arrived at King's Cross and hurriedly said their goodbyes before climbing onto the
train, which slowly began pulling out of the station. Fred and George left to find Lee
and Ginny was about to start a search for Michael when Harry spoke up.
"Shall we go and find a compartment then?" he asked.
"Er," said Ron.
"We're - well - Ron and I are supposed to go into the Prefect Carriage," Hermione said
awkwardly.
"Oh. Right. Fine," Harry said and Ginny decided that she had already waited all summer
to see Michael; she could wait a few hours more.
Ron and Hermione left, dragging their luggage behind them and Harry looked lost.
"Come on," Ginny told him, "if we get a move on we'll be able to save them places."
They walked nearly the whole length of the train before finding seats with Luna and
Neville. Luna was being as Luna-esque as usual and Ginny had to suppress a giggle at
the sight of Harry and Neville's bemused expressions. Neville began telling them all
what he'd got for his birthday. It was a small knobbly-looking grey plant, which
Neville seemed very proud of.
"Does it - er - do anything?" Harry asked.
"Loads of stuff! It's got an amazing defensive mechanism. Here, hold Trevor for
me..."
Neville got a quill out of his schoolbag and even Luna stopped reading her Dad's
magazine to watch. Suddenly the plant's boils were squirting liquid in all directions.
Fortunately, years living with Fred and George's pranks meant Ginny just managed to
react quick enough to avoid a faceful. Harry had not been so lucky; he was covered in
the smelly green slime and had to spit some out of his mouth.
"S-sorry," Neville gasped. "I haven't tried that before... I didn't realise it would
be quite so..." Neville looked horrified. "Don't worry though, Stinksaps's not
poisonous."
The compartment door opened and the Ravenclaw girl that Harry had asked to the Yule
Ball appeared.
"Oh... hello, Harry," she said nervously. "Um... bad time?"
"Oh... hi," Harry said blankly.
"Um... well... just thought I'd say hello... bye then."
She left again and Ginny was about to say that at least it wasn't Malfoy who'd seen
them when Harry slumped back in his seat and groaned. He looked mortified and Ginny
realised he'd probably rather it had been Malfoy. She forced herself to be
positive.
"Never mind," she said bracingly. "Look, we can easily get rid of all this." She
pulled out her wand. "Scourgify!" The Stinksap vanished.
And when we meet, which I'm sure we will
All that was there will be there still
I'll let it pass and hold my tongue
And you will think that I've moved on...
When the Hogwarts Express arrived in Hogsmeade Harry and Ginny joined the crowds of students jostling along the platform and got separated. Ginny bumped into Michael. It wasn't quite the reunion she'd pictured; he didn't kiss her and there wasn't room for him to have swept her off her feet, even if the thought had occurred to him. Ginny felt rather awkward.
"Er, hi. How was your summer?" she asked.
"Oh, okay. Yours?"
"Yeah, not too bad," Ginny said, thinking about her summer in The Order Of The
Phoenix's Headquarters. "Sorry I couldn't write."
"You never did say why that was," Michael said curiously.
And I never will, Ginny thought. She silently swore at Tom Riddle. Crookshanks started
squirming in her arms.
"Sorry, I should probably go and find Hermione. She'll be wanting her cat back."
"Right," Michael said.
"I'll see you later though?"
Fortunately, by the time they met up during break the next day, Michael had forgotten about their letter-less summer, or at least wasn't bothering to ask about it.
Ginny hadn't realised quite how much more work the fifth years had to do. Being in
Ravenclaw, Michael was naturally clever and his parents expected good results in his
OWLs so he spent vast amounts of time in the library. Ginny managed to coax him out
from time to time and she seemed to spend half the first term walking round the lake.
It gave them plenty of opportunity to get to know each other, although most of the
time Michael raved about Quidditch, reminding her of Ron. She invited him to join the
DA but was frustrated when he refused to curse her properly.
"You'll never improve if you don't try," Ginny told him.
"Yeah, well, I'm not really planning on meeting You-Know-Who anytime soon," he said
casually.
No-one ever does, Ginny thought. Well, no-one except...
The last month of term was miserable. It started off well; Ginny decided to try out for the Gryffindor Quidditch team and succeeded in filling in Harry's Seeker position (at least until he was allowed to return). She expected Michael to be excited for her, him being a big Quidditch fan, but he seemed almost annoyed. Ginny couldn't figure it out and let him sulk for three days before he finally acted normally around her again.
On the last full day of term Hermione sought Ginny out and insisted that they have a
private chat. Ginny wondered if her idiot brother had finally woken up and made a move
on her.
"Well?" Ginny asked excitedly once they were alone in Hermione's dorm.
"I just thought I should warn you about something," Hermione said.
"Warn me?" Ginny asked, puzzled.
"I thought it would be better if you heard it from me rather than, say, Ron."
"Heard what from you?"
"Well, I think Harry and Cho are going out. She kissed him."
"Oh," Ginny said, unable to hide the disappointment in her voice. She knew she
shouldn't be affected by this; she had a boyfriend; what did she care if her brother's
friend had a girlfriend? He deserved to be happy.
"Are you okay?" Hermione asked cautiously.
"Of course. I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" She couldn't talk about it yet - she had to
let it sink in first.
Ginny found it hard to sleep that night and had just dozed off when she found
Professor McGonagall gently shaking her awake again; Harry had seen her Dad being
attacked. The rest of the evening passed in a faintly nauseous daze until her mum
appeared in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. She gave a wan smile.
"He's going to be alright," she said weakly. "He's sleeping. we can all go and see
him later. Bill's sitting with him now; he's going to take the morning off work."
Ginny care how childish it might seem; she went to hug her mum.
Ginny ate breakfast then fell into bed, glad it was all over, and slept. They were in high spirits that afternoon when they visited St Mungo's and Ginny was relieved to see her dad smiling and well enough to give her a hug. After a while her mother told them all to wait outside whilst the Order members talked. Undeterred, Fred and George handed out Extendable Ears and they listened in.
Ginny could never have imagined what she would hear next.
"... obviously, Potter doesn't realise what that means, but if You-Know-Who's
possessing him-"
Harry had taken off his Extendable Ear and looked like he was about to be sick. Ginny
didn't feel too great herself; all the memories from her first year were suddenly
rushing back at her. Only this time she'd have to face them; she wouldn't hide
behind her Mum; she'd answer Harry's questions and hopefully reassure him.
On the tube back to Grimmauld Place Ginny sat next to Harry, waiting for the moment he'd ask her opinion, but it never came. He was avoiding looking at everyone, almost shrinking into himself. Ginny longed to reach out and touch him; let him know it was okay but he was too distant.
As soon as they got back to Grimmauld Place, Harry hid. He was undoubtedly the bravest person Ginny knew - except when the enemy was himself. He was noble, guilt-ridden and, yes, maybe just a little bit stubborn. Ginny had to stop herself several times from storming up the stairs to yell at him that she didn't care if he was possessed by every Dark wizard that ever lived; it wouldn't stop her - er,... all the Weasleys - from loving him. It took a whole day and the arrival of Hermione to bring him back to them.
"Oh, stop feeling all misunderstood," Hermione told Harry sharply. "Look, the others
have told me what you overheard last night on the Extendable Ears -"
Harry looked furious and Ginny felt a mixture of guilt, anger and sympathy whirling
around in the pit of her stomach.
"Yeah?" growled Harry, his hands deep in his pockets as he stared out the window at
the snow. "All been talking about me have you? Well, I'm getting used to it."
"We wanted to talk to you, Harry," Ginny said, attempting to keep her voice
level, "but as you've been hiding ever since we got back -"
"I didn't want anyone to talk to me," said Harry, who was looking more and more
irritated. For some reason this made something inside of Ginny burst.
"Well, that was a bit stupid of you, seeing as you don't know anyone but me who's been
possessed by You-Know-Who and can tell you how it feels," she said, allowing her anger
to escape. What was it with this boy? Why wouldn't he ever let people help him?
"I forgot."
Ginny felt like all her insides had sunk into her feet. He'd forgotten? How could he?
How dare he?
"Lucky you," she said coolly.
"I'm sorry." He seemed it and her anger dissipated as quickly as it had appeared.
"So... so, do you think I'm being possessed then?"
Ginny ignored the slightly ill feeling in her stomach and cast her mind back three
years.
"Well, can you remember everything you've been doing?" she asked. "Are there big blank
periods where you don't know what you've been up to?"
Harry looked thoughtful. "No," he said and Ginny felt like a weight had been lifted
from her - she really hadn't wanted to be the one to confirm that, yes, he had been
possessed.
"Then You-Know-Who hasn't ever possessed you," said Ginny simply. "When he did it to
me, I couldn't remember what I'd been doing for hours at a time. I'd find myself
somewhere and not know how I got there." Ginny fought to control an involuntary
shiver, but was rewarded by a faint glimmer of relief starting to appear in Harry's
eyes.
Hermione reverted to tried and tested methods - Hogwarts: A History was paraphrased again - and Harry finally believed them. As everyone busied themselves with Christmas preparations, no-one noticed Ginny sneak a satisfied look at Harry's smile. She'd done that; she'd managed to cheer him up, to reassure him. She felt a warmth inside her that had nothing to do with the roaring fire in the room and couldn't help but wonder if Harry's new girlfriend would have been able to do the same. Of course not, Ginny thought; Cho hadn't been possessed like she had, but that was nothing to brag about. And it certainly wasn't a reason to go out with someone. Her imagination pictured the ridiculous scene. "What? You've been possessed too? How wonderful! We must go for a romantic stroll around the lake and discuss it some time." Idiot, Ginny told herself as she went up to her room to wrap Michael's Christmas present.
I will go down with this ship.
* * *
It was Valentine's Day. The day for love, boyfriends and... Quidditch. Stupid Quidditch. She was drenched, covered in mud and part of what was quite possibly the worst Gryffindor Quidditch team that had ever existed. Angelina finally gave up and let them go in for dinner. Ginny caught the tail-end of a conversation; it seemed she wasn't the only one to have had a less-than-perfect day.
And I won't put my hands up and surrender.
* * *
Ginny looked at the packaging surrounding the Easter eggs and the scrawled red pen
across the top of it;
'Inspected and passed by the Hogwarts High Inquisitor.'
God-awful woman, Ginny thought as she walked though the corridors. She'd
given the twins, Hermione and Ron their eggs and Ron had said he thought Harry was in
the library. She spotted his rebellious black hair and went to deliver his egg.
"Hi Harry. Sorry to interrupt your revision but I thought you might like your Easter
egg. It's..."
Harry wasn't listening. He was staring at the table in front of him looking
dispondent.
"Harry? I'm talking to you, can you hear me?"
Ginny explained why she wasn't in Quidditch practise then quickly changed the subject.
He looked upset enough as it was without learning that without him the team was an
unmitigated disaster. She handed him his egg, hoping that it might cheer him up a
little.
Instead, he looked like he was about to cry and Ginny's world shrunk until there was
only her and an unhappy Harry in it. The Easter Egg was forgotten and the library
disappeared.
"Are you OK, Harry?" Ginny asked quietly, knowing both the truth and the answer he
would give.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he said gruffly.
Before, she would have had to let this go but now Ginny considered herself one of
Harry's friends so she was entitled to probe a little.
"You seem really down lately," she said. Ever since the day you and Cho fought, in
fact. Ginny overcame the urge to tell Harry that she wasn't worth it and he could
easily find someone else who cared about him, maybe even more so. That wasn't what he
needed to hear. "You know, I'm sure if you just talked to Cho..."
Harry surprised her. "It's not Cho I want to talk to."
"Who is it, then?" asked Ginny, watching his face closely to see what she could read
there.
"I..."
He checked that no-one else could hear him, glancing round at the other occupants of
the room, but Ginny kept her eyes firmly on his.
"I wish I could talk to Sirius," he muttered. "But I know I can't."
He looked resigned to this fact and Ginny was vaguely aware that they were now both
absent-mindedly picking at the chocolate on the desk in front of them. She couldn't let
it rest at that though. He had opened up a little. Not much, but he had let her take
the briefest of glimpses inside his head. Ginny wasn't going to let him down.
"Well, if you really want to talk to Sirius, I expect we could think of a way to do it,"
Ginny said, her mind working overtime. A distraction, maybe... Fred and George...
"Come on," Harry said dully. "With Umbridge policing the fires and reading all our
mail?"
"The thing about growing up with Fred and George," Ginny said, her mind still on the
problem, "is that you sort of start thinking anything's possible if you've got enough
nerve."
Harry looked at her and Ginny thought she could see, hidden somewhere in his expression,
the seeds of hope.
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?"
Madame Pince chased them from the library and Ginny set off to find the twins.
There will be no white flag above my door.
* * *
Ginny dived, catching the snitch from right under Cho's nose, and a cheer went up from the stands. She found herself looking round for Harry's reaction but he was nowhere to be seen. She did spot Michael though and waved as she passed him, caught up in the Gryffindor celebrations. He must not have seen her though, because he was watching the players from his own house.
The celebrations lasted long into the night and Ginny was happy to see Ron getting his share of the credit. The next morning Ginny caught up with Michael as he was leaving the Great Hall.
"Hi."
"Oh, hi."
Ginny grinned. "Aren't you going to congratulate me? Or are you a sore loser?" she
teased. Michael didn't look amused.
"You know, you didn't have to humiliate Cho like that."
Ginny's smile faded. "What? I just caught the snitch. Everyone misses it occasionally.
I wasn't trying to humiliate her."
"Hmm," Michael said, looking unconvinced.
Ginny couldn't believe it - he was actually annoyed that she'd caught the snitch. Not
only was he not going to congratulate her, but he was sulking because his team had
lost. How pathetic. Ginny felt her patience drain away.
"You know what, forget it," she said. "I don't care what you think. Why don't you go
and tell all your Ravenclaw friends how awful I am for not letting them win."
"Maybe I will."
"Please do. And don't bother talking to me again."
Michael looked momentarily shocked then walked back into the Great Hall.
Prat, Ginny thought as she waited for the tears to well up in her eyes. But they never came. She was upset that they'd split up, but realised she didn't really mind that they weren't together any more. Taking a couple of deep breaths, she went to get her books, unable - or perhaps unwilling - to stop herself wondering what Harry had thought of her catch.
I'm in love and always will be.
* * *
Ginny looked across at Harry over her magazine. Ron had just pointed out Cho though the compartment window and she couldn't help but be curious as to his reaction. He didn't seem to care. He didn't seem to care about alot of things these days. And he seemed small somehow, almost as if he were trying to disappear entirely.
"I - er - heard she's going out with someone else now," said Hermione tentatively.
"You're well out of it, mate, I mean she's quite good-looking and all that, but you
want someone a bit more cheerful."
God bless Ron for having at least one sensitive bone in his body, even if he did lack
eloquence.
"She's probably cheerful enough with someone else," said Harry, shrugging.
"Who's she with now, anyway?" Ron asked Hermione.
Ginny automatically answered. "Michael Corner." She'd seen them walking around the
lake together a few days before. (He never had been the most original date.)
Ron spluttered and Ginny had to explain what a tosser her ex was.
"Just choose someone - better - next time," he said, casting a rather obvious glance in
Harry's direction.
Ginny cringed. Didn't Ron realise that the last thing Harry needed to worry about right
now was some silly love-sick girl following him around? (Not that she was planning on
doing anything of the sort.) She thought quickly and picked a name at random.
"Well, I've chosen Dean Thomas, would you say he's better?" She tried to sound
nonchalant and picked up her magazine, realising too late that it was upside-down.
Fortunately, Ron's indignation and Pigwidgeon's twittering meant no-one noticed.
I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love and always will be
Ginny thought she saw the corners of Harry's mouth creep up a little as Hermione muttered at Ron whilst she helped him pick up the chess pieces that were now scattered across the floor.
I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my hands up and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
She subtly turned her magazine the right way up again and continued her quiz (How
susceptible are you to the Augery's cry?) She was up to question six:
How would you describe your normal emotional state?
With a sigh, Ginny ticked the last box; I'm in love
before adding in her own writing;
and always will be.
She was apparently very susceptible.
The End.
A/N: I hope you liked this even if you don't know (or dislike?!) Dido's music. Do you
even read the lyrics in song fics, or just skip over them? Comments, compliments and
(constructive) criticism always welcome. . .
Until next time,
myrtilleEtMure,
xxx
