The following takes place in the Gryffindor common room from the hours of one a.m. to two p.m. between one Sirius Black and one Remus Lupin. Hope you enjoy.
Moons?
…
Moons, are you awake?
No.
Then why did you just respond.
…
What?
Go to hell.
Only if you go.
Screw you Pads.
Drop your pants.
…
What?
Why in all nine hells are you on top of me?
'Cuz you're so damn comfortable.
I'll take that as a complement.
Good, it was meant as one.
Now, can we get to the important issue of why one of my best mates is laying on top of me at one in the morning?
I was lonely.
Then why don't you bother Prongs?
'Cuz he's only with Lilly in his dreams. And I value my manhood, and my life.
What about Wormtail?
Me in the same bed as him? Out of the question, God alone knows what's living in his bed. Not to mention all of the stale jizz that's on his sheets, ing rat.
Why not Mom?
And bother Minnie at this late hour? No.
Sirius?
Yes?
Um… what's that in your pants?
What pants?
So you're not wearing any pants?
Nope.
So that's…
All me.
…
Remus?
Why so formal?
Because Messer Moony I have something that I need to tell you.
What is it Messer Padfoot?
I love you.
…
Moons?
…
Remus?
I have something that I need to tell you as well.
Shoot.
Rather not.
Smartass.
Damn straight.
Well what is it that you need to tell me?
I love you more.
Come here you dirty little wolf.
You first you flea-bitten mutt.
Hey! My fleas happen to be very y. Thank you very much!
Bet your pretty little ass they are.
My ass is not little!
Shut up and snogg me bitch.
Hey…
…
Moons?
Yes love?
Where did you learn to kiss like that?
Lucius is just so damn y.
…
Joking Pads. In third year that Ravenclaw Rowena.
I knew that you fancied her, and you even had the balls to deny it.
Just because your so small, doesn't mean that everyone else does too, besides now that you're my bitch, I can carry for the both of us.
I am not small and I am no ones bitch.
Would you two shut the hell up?
What if we were in the middle of shagging prongs? How would you feel, knowing that you just ruined that for us?
Moons I am surprised at the level of dirtiness that your mind contains.
Well seeing as how I have heard every thing that you two have said, and I wouldn't be surprised if McGonagall can hear you.
He has a point Pads.
No .
Don't be that way Sirius.
Silencio. Now we can be loud as the hell we want when we're making love.
Nice touch.
Thank you.
Lets sleep.
Okay.
Kiss me goodnight?
Will you be a good boy and not try to me?
You know Remus its not if its willing.
…
Remus?
…
Moons?
…
Love bumpkin?
Oh God in heaven, save me.
What?
Don't ever say that again.
Hmpf, fine then love humphfkin.
…
Why are you looking at me like that?
Get out of my bed.
That hurts Moons.
Good night Pads.
Good night Moons.
…
…
…
Why haven't you left yet?
Because im suddenly paralyzed from the knee's down.
…
What?
No seriously why haven't you left yet?
I thought that I would sleep with you.
…
What?
What are you doing to my pants?
Well they're in the way.
I like my pants where they are, thank you very much.
…
What are you doing now?
Um… nothing?
What do I smell?
Nothing.
Is that lotion?
Maybe.
Leave. Now.
But…
No buts mister. Either you leave this bed now, or you'll have to change dorm rooms.
Damn.
…
…
Leave.
Fine mister party pooper.
…
…
You still haven't left ye… oh… oh… ahhhhhh god. STOP IT!
Don't it feel good?
I wasn't saying thaa…
…
….
…
….
…
…
…
…
Best damn shag I've had in a while.
…
So can I stay?
If you do that again.
Alright.
Let the fun begin.
Ame….
well tell me what you think liked it. d it? i dont care just review and all will be well.
