This fan fic special was suggested by my buddy white rose. She wanted a St. Patrick's day special, and I'm gonna give it to you! Italics is white Zetsu, bold and caps is black Zetsu.

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Akatsuki St. Patrick's Day Special: Zetsu's Love Affair

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Kisame barely noticed as Zetsu snuck around the corner, not so expertly hiding something inside his cloak. Naturally the shark nin was curious, but NOBODY followed that guy into his room. Only if you wanted to be eaten! Itachi also glared after the plant nin curiously, his sharingan activating in a futile attempt to see what Zetsu was hiding. He looked up at Kisame, his unreadable gaze only readable to Kisame. Let's follow him.

Alone, neither would have a chance at bothering Zetsu. But together... maybe! Kisame glanced around the corner, quickly sneaking back after he spotted Tobi following Zetsu into the room. What was he up to? Did he know about Zetsu's secret guest? Tobi stayed for only a moment, apparently chased from the room immediately as he dodged flying kunai shooting from the open door. No luck trying to question the kid. Kisame's eyes widened as he saw that Tobi's mask had been painted green, and he choked a laugh. Itachi glared at him from his spot by his side, not able to see what was going on. Kisame smirked and whispered. "The kid's mask is green today. I wonder why?"

Itachi shrugged. "Hn... doesn't matter. Go." Kisame's grin disappeared but he nodded, sneaking around the corner as soon as Tobi left. When he reached the door, he waved broadly to Itachi, hoping that he could see the gesture. His eyesight really was getting terrible. Itachi followed after Kisame, the two leaning as close to the door as they dared. Itachi's hearing had improved over the past months, compensating for his failing sight, and he could barely hear the strange conversation inside.

"Were we followed?"

"NO, THEY DIDN'T SEE US."

"Are you sure?"

"YES, THAT IDIOT TOBI IS THE ONLY ONE THAT PAYS ATTENTION TO US."

"Then should we...?"

"WHY SHOULDN'T WE?"

"Leader-sama would get angry if he found out."

"HE ONLY WANTS US TO KEEP OUR FOOD OUT OF THE HIDEOUT. THIS ONE IS NOT FOOD."

"He still wouldn't approve of bringing in an outsider..."

"HE WON'T FIND OUT ABOUT THIS. STOP WORRYING SO MUCH."

A slight pause, followed by a soft rustle. "My poor darling, I won't let Leader-sama take you." Itachi and Kisame looked at each other nervously, wondering what was going on. Zetsu was bringing an outsider into the base? Who knew Zetsu could love ANYTHING? How was that even possible? They didn't even need to say what they wanted to do next, they both knew what to do. Simultaneously, they opened Zetsu's door suddenly, bracing for the inevitable. Zetsu cringed suddenly, his sleeves and oversized cloak hiding whatever was under him.

Kisame gulped nervously, reminding himself that it was one of the rules to not bring in outsiders. Zetsu needed to be confronted. "Zetsu-san... Come on, show us what's under your cloak. We're not mad..."

Itachi nodded, impassive but to Kisame's perceptive eyes he could see a touch of worry. "Yes, explain yourself. We won't tell Leader-sama..."

Zetsu hesitated, both halves of his personality completely shocked. He was caught. With one last look of irritation, he moved aside, revealing a small pot of dirt with a single four-leaf clover planted inside.

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A/N: Yay for March 17th! Tomorrow is the 18th, Kisame's birthday... you just KNOW I will do something fabulous!