Disclaimer: All the characters on Charmed do not belong to me (in fact none of them do). I'm just borrowing them.

Summary: this fic takes place during the episode Charmed and Dangerous. The story begins just after Leo is shot by the darklighter.

Author's note: OK this is my first Charmed fic so tell me how I did.



Death and Duty



When Piper pulled out the arrow, Leo felt as though half his soul was torn out with it. Groaning, he sunk back on the couch clutching his wounded chest. They didn't have much time. His energy was leaving him fast.

Piper began expertly tucking a blanket around him. Deep concern shone in her eyes just behind a sparkling curtain of tears. She could act so strong and yet so motherly at the same time, though she'd never admit it.

Reaching out a hand, Leo cupped her face. "Everything's going to be okay," he whispered but the horse words lacked conviction.

Piper smiled faintly. Turning into Leo's hand, she kissed his warm palm lightly, and told him to rest.

Leo did feel tired. He closed his eyes and murmured, "I love you" to Piper. Slipping into an unsettling half sleep, he was groggily aware of people moving in and out of the room, and of an itching pain that burned in his chest.

He could still hear the murmuring voices of his charges. They sounded like static; only a backdrop to his pain and exhaustion. Suddenly, a clear voice stabbed into his mind.

Pain. Fear. Cold. Sadness. Leo focused on the voice and tried to hear more. The pain in his chest deepened and stung as he attempted to extend his powers, but Leo still strained to listen.

Why did Billy have to die? I should have died.

"Jackie," Leo whispered. He knew the voice.

He shouldn't have tried to protect me. Then maybe he would be alive.

Leo's breathing became more labored and sweat beads broke out on his forehead. He grit his teeth trying to focus; to forget the pain. The dots of moisture conformed into drops and rolled down his face. Another voice mixed with Jackie's. It was Piper's.

"You need to sleep Leo," she had a worried warning tone in her voice. With a washcloth, she dabbed at his forehead, and then lightly caressed his face with the back of her hand. "Sleep," she commanded gently.

Leo wanted to tell her about Jackie, but felt too weak. The voices started to fade away and an eerie uncomfortable silence ensued. Then the room faded as he fell into a disturbed sleep.

* * *

A beach in Southern California

Same time

A lone figure sat by the ocean. Her head was bent down and shoulders shaking in an all too familiar rhythm of grief.

She stilled for a moment and looked up at the clear cobalt sky. Night had set in several hours ago, and the only sources of outdoor lighting were a bright full moon and golden spray of stars. The taunt full sail of a passing boat seemed to catch the sparkling dots as it glided easily across the black water.

Jackie looked on solemnly as the boat went by. Billy had loved to go sailing. They'd gone out on his boat nearly every weekend. Biting her lip, Jackie halfheartedly forced back tears, but the sparkling wet beads continued to fall out of her eyes in strands.

Maybe if she had locked their apartment door after coming home from work that day, none of this would have happened at all. The man wouldn't have been able to come in. He wouldn't have raped her, and then Billy wouldn't have gotten shot. Jackie hugged her knees, and rocked back and forth, her face buried in the fabric of her dress. Billy had walked in while she was being raped. The man hadn't thought to lock the door either. Billy grabbed a knife from the kitchen, but the man had a gun, and he shot Billy. He shot her Billy.

She had felt him die. Jackie was an empath. She could sense what other's felt, and sometimes inadvertently projected her feelings to other people. She and Billy had shared a deep connection. When he died, the severing of their bond seemed to literally tear her apart.

Jackie looked back up and breathed in the moonlight. "Lord and Lady tell me what to do," she pleaded. Jackie felt so empty like there was a hole inside her. A big gaping tatter edged hole. She tried to fill it in with tears but not all the moisture in the world could fill that bottomless well. The emptiness grew so large that it swallowed the moon and made the night black, directionless.

"Lord and Lady, help me!" she wailed again, but was greeted only with a blanket of chilly water. Waves washed over her legs and dress, pooling around her still form. The tide was rising.

Soft gritty sand squished between her toes, and the pink wrinkly digits scrunched at the granules. Suddenly, pain shot through her as her wiggling toes scraped against a tiny sharp clamshell. Jackie didn't flinch. She watched a trickle of dark blood creep across the sand before foaming waves covered it over. Erased it.

Jackie wiped her nose, rubbed at her raw eyes, and stood up, shivering. Her silhouetted form was short and rail thin. Gusting wind blew at her dress, and dark brown hair cut in a chin length bob swished around her head. A beak like nose protruded from her slightly pale face; crying ad given her cheeks a little more color than usual, and deep chocolate eyes reflected the rippling waves of the ocean.

Without thinking, her legs carried her forward into the water. As she started to swim, the thin fabric of her dress plastered itself to her legs, creating a slight drag. Despite that, she waded out far to tall rocking waves that bobbed her up and down. The dark coldness began to numb her over,and wash away emotions. The terrible feelings were plucked from her form, and went somewhere else.

* * *

Leo woke up cold. Very cold, and shivering. Every one of his aching muscles twitched, trying to warm him up. He gripped the blanket with white knuckles as sharp throbbing pains shot through him. Woven in with the pain, other emotions swam and attacked his mind with bitter force. Not enough, however, to blanket over his hurt which continued to rage on.

These feelings were not his, and the foreign invaders felt uncomfortable in Leo. They were a separate form; separate from him. So familiar, so close he could reach out for it. And he did. His hand connected with air. Nothing but grief and anger gnawed at him. No Jackie. No.she was far away. If only he could orb, he could find the sadness.

But he didn't orb; he slept, and the pain weighed down on his chest even more. Time was running out.

* * *

After half an hour of treading water, Jackie's arms ached and the tired limbs began to droop at her sides. Reinforced by her lessened will to stay afloat, the large waves pushed her closer and closer to the shore. She was nearing their breaking point. Her head briefly dipped below the murky surface, but she shot up quickly, sputtering strong tasting salt water.

An oncoming wave caught Jackie's attention. She watched the wall of water grow and approach her. Spending so much time at the beach, she knew the timing of the waves and this one was going to crest right on top of her. Instinctively, she tried to swim over it; to beat it. Her arms and legs moved slowly. Stuck in time.

The wave crashed over her, slamming her body against the rough sandy bottom. A powerful rush filled Jackie's ears. The pressure strengthened and all the colors that played behind her closed eyes had been turned to black. She struggled minimally, knowing she only needed to wait it out. The pressure eased as the wave finished its run, but the undertow wasn't quite through with her yet. It grabbed a hold of her and roughly forced her down further.

Jackie had much experience in these types of situations. The best thing to do was just let it take her until its power dropped off and she could surface. But she didn't want it to take her; she didn't want him to take her. She wanted to fight back, to win, and to escape.

With renewed rage driven energy, Jackie flayed her limbs in frantic and undisciplined moves. Anger made her blood rush; she was barely aware of what she was doing. The force of the water seemed to tie her up in knots. She wasn't getting anywhere, but she fought on. She fought for her life, for Billy, and for freedom.

Lungs burned. Water pounded. There was one last person she could turn to for help.

"LEO!"

* * *

The desperate call shot down Leo's spine and raced back up again. Before he could fully register reality, he tried to orb. The tingling sensation of the blue lights filled his body but was soon smothered by pain and weakness. Leo groaned as spots blotched his vision, and his head became light. Temples pounding, he tried to center himself, but the spots now smeared across the whole room. Dizziness didn't help.

He couldn't hear her anymore, and he couldn't feel her either.

* * *

"LEO!" she yelled again from underwater. The muddled scream came out as a cloud of bubbles. The tiny air pockets swirled and danced in the dark water before ascending to the surface. Jackie wished she could grab a hold of one and rise effortlessly with it. She'd be safe, and he couldn't hurt her anymore.

In response to her cries for help, the undertow only seemed to tighten its grip and drag her down further; faster. Lack of oxygen made her lungs burn. She felt like something was scorching her from the inside out. Never before had she thought so much pain could be bottled up in her tiny form. Another cry tore out her lips. This one was more primal; it held no noticeable form or sounds; just attempting to release the pain.

Salt water rushed into her now open mouth making her gag. Reflexes caused Jackie to breath in deeply; only it wasn't refreshing oxygen that bathed her lungs. She gasped and thrashed, searching for air, but water kept rushing in, penetrating her.

Jackie jerked in a last few spasms before her body stilled, and quieted. The waves continued to push her around but calmed as she reached deeper waters. Soft currents fluttered the skirt of her dress and played with her limp hair. Jackie's body remained trapped in watery suspension like a cold, haunting snow globe figurine.

* * *

Leo felt warmth on his chest, and then it spread over his body. Slowly, he peeled back his eyelids and saw Paige and Phoebe standing over him, smiles on their faces. He smiled back weakly. They'd survived. All of them. But a hazy dream-like memory of death fogged up his mind. The fuzzy dark image was barely enough to grasp. Someone was drowning. No, Someone had drowned. In his disorientation, Leo couldn't really complete the picture, and something told him it would be better that way.