Tea for Two
A Halice Fanfiction
"Alice…"
The named young woman jumped as she heard the soft, sudden voice outside her chamber door. But quickly recognizing it, she smiled and turned around. "Come in, please."
The White Queen, Mirana, gently opened the door, slipped inside and closed it with equal grace. "Hello, dearest Alice," she greeted the girl.
"Hello, Your Majesty," replied the slightly confused but quite pleased Champion of Underland. "May I help you with something?"
"It's not me you'll be helping," said the Queen, "but rather Tarrant."
Alice frowned. "Tarrant? Who's Tarrant?"
"Why, the Mad Hatter, of course!" exclaimed the Queen in bemusement. She paused for a moment, then continued: "Oh dear, I always forget that you're new to Underworld; it slipped my mind that I hadn't properly introduced the two of you. Everyone knows Tarrant, he's always been Tarrant, even when he wasn't the Mad Hatter. Because he hasn't always been so mad, you know."
She stopped and smiled pleasantly at Alice as though patiently explaining something simple to a child.
"Ah…yes." Alice said, still trying to process the riddled confusion of her words.
"Anyhow," continued the Queen breezily, "he wanted me to give you this." She flourished a yellow, battered-looking, tea-stained piece of parchment and Alice took it. Her duty done, Queen Mirana turned and flounced back to the door. But before she ducked out, she winked secretively at Alice and said in a stage whisper: "I trust you'll have a good time—Tarrant's tea parties are the best around!"
As the door closed Alice frowned again—there was no one else in Underland who hosted tea parties, so therefore there was no one to weigh against the Hatter to see if his tea parties were really the best. But the girl pushed this scattered thought aside and opened the letter, presumably written in the jumbled scrawl of the Mad Hatter himself:
Alice,
Request your presence at the Frabjous Day Tea Party. Rabbit is sick with kallookalay, and Cheshire says he has better things to do. Please come?
Hatter.
(P.S. if you come I might treat you to a private performance of the Futterwacken)
Giggling helplessly at the antics of the fluffy ginger-haired hat-making madman, Alice folded the note and rose from her seat. Striding outside, she came face-to-face with the Queen, who had been all-too-innocently hovering right outside her door. "You Majesty, is the Bandersnatch awake? I'd like to take him for a ride to the Hatter's house."
The White Queen smiled. "Right away and of course, Champion."
Alice was off the Bandersnatch's furry back and already running headlong for the top of the Hatter's hill by the time it trotted to a halt. Stumbling over her dress, Alice crested the ridge and spotted the dilapidated old tophat-shaped windmill that served as his home, then, taking the last few feet at a sprint, the tea table itself came into sight.
The Mad Hatter was there, of course, bending busily over the rumpled tablecloth and brushing something off. He turned as he heard the footsteps approaching and gasped aloud to see Alice running toward him; his vibrant green eyes lit up like beacons and his hair fluffed out even more. "Alice…!"
"Hatter!"
The breath whooshed from his body as she flung herself into his waiting arms; despite his slight build, Alice found that he was surprisingly strong as he tentatively embraced her. His ratty clothes and pale skin smelt of warm, dusty sunlight and herby tea. "Dear, dear Hatter," she grinned, pulling back. Meeting his wide, pulsating emerald eyes, all of a sudden she felt quite jittery and warm in the face. "Or, should I say, Tarrant?"
Confusion flashed across his face like a fleeting shadow and then vanished. "How in Underworld do you know my name? I never told you, that is, that I remember of. Then again, I don't remember much of anything!" he giggled. His corkscrew ginger curls bounced as he bobbed his head.
"The Queen told me," Alice said.
"Mmh, the Queen," grunted Tarrant dismissively, looking unimpressed. "Should've known…she tells everyone's secrets to anybody, even if they're not secrets."
Alice blinked. "You're not making any sense."
The Hatter giggled again. "I'm mad, remember? It's part of my job not to make any sense!"
"True," smiled the young woman.
His mirth suddenly fading, Tarrant blinked. "Thank you for coming, Alice," he murmured. "I didn't want to be alone." He looked back at the vacant tea table with a note of sadness. "Teatime isn't nearly as fun when you're alone." Then, startling her, he jumped and clapped his hands. "But enough! What are we waiting for? Let the ballyhoo begin!"
They seated themselves at opposite ends of the long table, with Alice at the end and The Mad Hatter resuming his rightful place at the head. "Catch," he said suddenly, and Alice hardly had time to look up before a large metal box landed in her lap.
"Wh-what is this?" Alice asked, her heart pounding from the scare.
"Open it and see," the Hatter replied mischievously, his gap-toothed grin resembling the Cheshire Cat's.
Hesitantly the girl did, and immediately relaxed upon seeing the contents. "Tea bags," she stated, even more perplexed. "Why tea bags?"
This time Tarrant laughed aloud, his high-pitched, warbling chuckle frightening the birds out of the trees around them. "Why to have tea, of course!" he guffawed, kicking his heels against the legs of his chair. "What kind of ninnypickened Uplander are you to not know why tea bags exist?"
"I know what tea bags are for!" Alice said snappishly, her grip tightening on the tin box. "I was just wondering why you gave them to me."
Seemingly not at all perturbed by her temper flare, the Hatter kicked his long legs out over the arm of his chair and sprawled there, resting his chin on one fist and gazing coolly at her. His eyes were glowing, half-lidded pools of deep green. "It would be quite rude of me to choose a flavor of tea without consulting my guest first, wouldn't it?" he lisped innocently.
"Oh." Now Alice felt her anger melt into mortification; she had snapped at him for being polite! Biting her lip, she gave a tiny nod. "Yes…I suppose it would. Thank you for considering me." He said nothing, but switched his focus to her hands as she began sifting through the little pouches of herbs. "Raspberry…no…Red Mushroom? I think not…what on earth is a Tortlewort? Whatever it is, I'm not in the mood," she said hastily, seeing Tarrant perk up on the other end of the table. "Um…Lemon. That's it, let's do lemon."Deftly she plucked out two bags of lemon-flavored tea and tossed one to the Hatter, who caught it gracefully in midair without taking his eyes off hers. "Pass me the kettle, please?" she asked.
He silently slid the rusty kettle down the table and she stopped it with a hand before pouring her cracked cup full of piping hot water and returning it. Of course, he had to make a show of pouring his water into the cup from over his head and grinning goofily at her; the steam rose in delicate, wispy silver patterns, seeming to form shapes in the breeze. Alice ducked her head and busily dabbled her tea bag around, inhaling the sharp, hot scent of herbs and lemon rind as it permeated the water.
"You're awfully quiet," the Hatter said amiably, breaking the awkward silence.
"There's not much to talk about," she responded, still staring at her tea.
To her surprise, Tarrant's lime-colored eyes flared. "Not much to talk about?" he cried indignantly. "You're the Jabberwocky-Slaying Champion of Underland!"
"And you're the Futterwacking Champion of Underland," Alice retorted evenly. "You don't think your skills are much ado, do you? Well, neither do I." She dipped her tea bag again. "I only did what I did because I had to do it."
"No, Alice."
The sudden softness of the Mad Hatter's voice made her look up. He had set his cup down and was staring at her with a burning intensity that raised gooseflesh on her arms. "No," he repeated. "You did what you had to do because you love the people you did it for."
Alice's breath caught in her chest. Suddenly all the colors of their surroundings seemed doubly bright.
"That's what makes you a Champion," the Hatter finished, reclining again and sipping his tea quietly without meeting her eyes.
"Thank you," whispered Alice, feeling slightly dizzy.
Suddenly, Tarrant chucked his teacup aside, bolted up from his seat, said, "Come with me," and charged off into his house.
Coughing slightly, Alice gulped down the last few scalding mouthfuls of tea and followed. He had left the door open and was now flicking lights on, bathing the crooked old wooden structure in wavering amber. A rickety, narrow spiral staircase wound up and up to the very top of the building. "Go up," ordered the Hatter, pointing.
"Why are you suddenly ordering me around like this?" Alice demanded. "What's going on?"
The Hatter's firmness morphed into open innocence. "Please, Alice," he lisped. "Please just do it. I…" he hesitated. "I have something to show you."
Her mind whirling, Alice obediently scaled the creaking steps and eventually reached the top. It was a platform with a trapdoor hatch built into the ceiling; opening it and heaving herself through, Alice found herself on yet another platform, only this one was positioned outside on top of the house, open to the sky above.
"Look up," said the Mad Hatter behind her, making her flinch and gasp. But, stifling her fright, she lifted her head and was immediately struck dumb with wonder. The night sky of Underworld stretched out overhead, the stars all flashing and darting about in their velvety black realm, shedding trails of stardust in their wake. Rippling waves of muted rainbow color washed across the sky to the West.
"How have I never seen this?" gaped Alice. "It's…it's…so gorgeous."
At her side, the Hatter grinned. "It's my best-kept secret." Then he paused. "Well, no. My second-best-kept secret."
"Oh, and what's your first?" Alice asked, turning to him with a smile.
He stuck his nose up in the air and gave her a sideways look, his emerald-hued eyes bright in the starlight. "If I told you it wouldn't be a secret."
"Come on, Hatter, I'm your closest friend!" protested Alice pitifully, sticking her lower lip out and giving him her best puppy-dog eyes.
"Don't call me Hatter," he said suddenly. "Call me Tarrant. Please."
"What?" she said, startled. "Why?"
"Because," he said, and here his voice dropped to a throaty whisper, "everyone calls me Hatter."
"Why is that such a bad thing?" Alice queried, her heart suddenly picking up speed.
"Because you're not just anyone," whispered Tarrant. He edged closer and pursed his dark red lips; by now his irises were practically burning, they were so bright.
Alice swayed slightly and felt his hand ever so lightly touch her hip. "Well, if I'm not just anybody, then who does that make me?" she murmured breathlessly.
"Alice," breathed Tarrant, half an answer to her question and half an exhalation of raw desire. They both knew what was coming next, and Alice closed her eyes and let herself slip into bliss as he crossed the space between them and kissed her. She could feel the longing he was withholding in the trembles wracking his frame, but their embrace was gentle and as sweet as the sugared lemon she tasted on his lips.
Finally they pulled away, both staring deep into each other's eyes and trying to fathom what had just happened. "Tarrant," said Alice, his name feeling unusual as it tripped off her tongue.
"Alice," replied the Hatter quietly, gazing evenly at her, his hands still on her sides.
"You…" Swallowing hard, the young woman looked out at the beautiful night sky again. "You know I have to leave, don't you."
Fiery green dimmed to dull gray as the Hatter's eyes changed with his emotion slump. His entire body heaved when he sighed. "Yes. But you could stay, Alice. You really could," he told her hopefully.
Alice closed her eyes and soaked in that moment. At first, when she came to Underland years ago, she had been convinced she was dreaming, hallucinating, or just completely insane. But now, pressed against Tarrant's firm chest, feeling his arms around her and breathing in his scent of earthy tea mingled with the heavy scent of nightflowers and dew, she suddenly came to reality.
This was her reality.
"Yes, Tarrant," she whispered, then said louder and more confidently, "Yes! Yes, yes, I can stay! I will stay!" Hopping around in pure ecstasy, she flung her arms around his neck and kissed him; he returned the embrace with equal verve.
When they finally broke apart again they were breathless and grinning like Cheshire Cats. "What a sight we must be," panted Alice, her face burning scarlet.
"You don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to," said Tarrant slyly, lacing his long, graceful fingers through hers. "After all, you are my best-kept secret."
THE END
