Cover Girl's Big Adventure ( I had no idea what to name this thing) By Slayne22 2221

Disclaimer- Don't own no Joes nor snakes, nor do i profit from them in any way except the rich experience of life's little lessons. Will still take Beachhead though if DD and others get sick of him.

Notes- Another little fic to show that Beachhead is not an A-hole all the time. ( by the way, I completely enjoy the A-hole side of him as well...I just wanted it be balanced out a little) I tried for the humor thing here though with a little attraction thrown in for good measure. I don't really know Cover Girl that well. I think I got close for her, but if I'm way off, I apologize. I also have no idea what type of electronic work she is doing in the beginning of the fic. I had no real idea for that so I just tried to make it sound...'technical'. :-) It also takes place in Wisconsin, which is where I live, just for the hell of it. I'm using Ohio as their base location.

Rated R for lotsa bad language

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^



Cover Girl's Big Adventure

Cover Girl pressed her lips together and furrowed her brow as she stared down at the electronic guts of the small box.

"Ok..." she muttered to herself, "He said red to yellow and black to green, right?"

Cover girl quickly snipped the wires and stuck the cut ends into the stripper part of the tool, pulling the rubber coating from the copper strands. She was twisting two ends together to join two of the wires when her radio crackled softly.

"Cover Girl...Cobras at two o'clock!" came the deep voice with the soft southern accent.

"What?" she cried out softly in surprise, her head jerking up and looking around into the surrounding woods. "Where? I thought Recondo was keeping an eye on them?"

"I thought so too, this group must have slipped by...there's 10 of them, Corporal...get out of there, now!"

"Jesus!" she swore softly, her fingers flying on the wires, trying to get them all connected. If an alarm went off, they were all cooked. How the hell had she been chosen for this mission? She was out in the middle of the Wisconsin woods being all ninja-ey and crap. It didn't even involve an engine for Christ's sake!

"Beach!" she hissed into the com on her collar. "How long do I have?"

"ETA...only a few minutes...get the hell out of there...that's an order!"

"I think I can still finish this!"

"Corporal! I said get the hell out of there!"

"Hold on..." She began re-attaching the connections in the order Mainframe had made her memorize them. Suddenly she heard a snapping twig in the distance along with a low voice.

She shoved the mess of wires back into the metal box and shut the door, Shit! She had no time to run. If she tried to sneak off, they might see her. She couldn't face 10 vipers alone. Her head twisted furiously glancing around at her surroundings. She needed someplace to hide. The trees were tall and bare with few low branches, the shrubs sparse and small. God...they would be here very soon. Her gaze fell on the small pond and, with a short curse, she began pulling her fatigues off.

"Get here soon, Beachhead! I can't run!"

"Cover Girl, get out! Now!"

"Too late...get your ass in here and find me!" she growled, knowing that the glaring lack of protocol towards a ranking soldier on this mission would catch up to her later...especially since that soldier was Beachhead.

She stripped down to her white t-shirt and stuffed the green long- sleeved military issue shirt along with the small radio under a nearby shrub. She knew she'd never be able to unlace her boots in time, so she cut the laces with her knife and pulled them roughly from her feet, shoving them along side her shirt. Her camo pants went next and she was silently grateful that she had worn the tight cotton shorts under them instead of normal underwear. Her gun went under another shrub and then she was running into the pond and submerging herself in the freezing water. It ripped the breath momentarily from her lungs, and she swam to the surface, gasping. It wasn't very deep, and she found she could stand easily on the sand bottom with her head above the surface. It was very cold though...and didn't smell the best.

There was a tense shout as the troop heard her splash and, in seconds, the Cobra troop was breaking into the clearing and standing along the pond's shore, their guns trained steadily on her. Their deep blue uniforms and masked faces looked menacing in the darkened glade and the Cobra officer in charge, strode down to the edge of the pond and raised his pistol towards her.

"You! Who are you...come out!"

She felt a burst of uneasiness as bolts were slid home on the weapons. They could shoot her right here and be done with her...but she didn't think they recognized she was a Joe. She was still fairly obscure...and none of the upper command of Cobra was with them. These were the lowly ranks of infantry...the one's who died without knowing their enemy at all. But...she had to give them some reason to relax...some reason not to just shoot her.

She raised her hands out of the water and widened her eyes in fear."Oh geez! I'm sorry! What the hell?"

"Who are you?" came the sharp command again.

"I'm just...geez, don't shoot me!" she cried out, feigning fear and desperation.

The officer actually took a step into the water and leveled his gun at her head. Could she duck fast enough if he fired, she wondered?

"Who are you? I won't ask again."

"I'm..my name is...uh, Sue...please don't shoot! I'm just a hiker...I'm just swimming!" Oh, that was smooth she thought, nearly wincing.

"A hiker?"

"Yeah..."she motioned behind her. "I'm with a group...we're hiking the trails in Chequamegon...I'm sorry I went off the path, Jesus! Don't shoot me!" God...had she pronounced that right? Recondo had talked about the National Forest where he had camped as a kid on the flight up here. She thought it was right.

The officer seemed to relax slightly, but his gun remained trained on her. Chequamegon backed up to the Cobra property. He glanced back at his men and then back at her.

"This isn't Chequamegon National Forest...you're on private property!"

Courtney looked confused. "I am?" she glanced around and then bit her lip and looked innocently at the Cobra. "Look...I'm really sorry! I didn't realize...I'll get off your property right away, really!"

"You'll stay right here...until we determine who you are."

"I told you...I'm a hiker. Look...I'm hiking with a big group...I got in a fight with my boyfriend and I ran off...I thought I'd make him worry about me for awhile, ya know?" she tried a weak smile. The masked faces remained stony and glaring.

"I didn't think I wandered so far. I know they're really close...I'll just get dressed and leave, ok?"

The soldiers glanced at each other. That's right boys,she thought silently. Biiiig group of people very close by. Now we don't want to shoot off those guns and attract lots of attention to ourselves do we?

The officer waved his gun at her. "Come out of there."

She bit her lip nervously. "You're not gonna shoot me, are you?"

He stared at her for a long moment and then lowered his gun. "No...of course not...you're just lost. We'll take you back to your group."

The soothing tone of his voice was almost sickingly sweet and Cover Girl blanched. Sure you will, big boy, she thought sarcastically. She made a small, slow move forward though, as if she believed him. Her dog- tags bumped against her chest and she stopped, alarmed. If they saw any hint of military proof on her...she'd be dead. She reached up under the water and grabbed the tags in her hand, pulling hard. The chain dug painfully into her nape and then snapped. She dropped them and felt them brush her legs as they sank.

"Come out...now! We will help you."

"Ok, ok...I'm just a little nervous, ok? I'm not wearing much."

That brought a few raised eye-brows from the troop and she did an eye- roll in her mind. Her eyes darted around quickly at the surrounding fauna. Had it been enough time for Beachhead to get there? She began to walk slowly out of the pond towards the Cobra troop. As the water dropped to waist level, she saw a few of the rifles waver slightly and lower as the trooper's eyes widened. She glanced down, uneasily, to see the near transparent quality of the wet t-shirt. With the added cold, she was sure it was quite a site for them. Her cheeks colored red before she tightened her jaw and strode confidently out of the water. She had left the modeling industry to get away from all of this, but...she knew how to work it. They didn't suspect she was a Joe, or she'd be dead already. Whatever she could use to her advantage would be welcome. She stood in front of them boldy, with her hands on her hips. The officer's eyes raked down her and then back up. His eyes narrowed and she knew she'd see a smug smile on the face if he wasn't masked.

"Are you guys with the army or something?" she asked innocently.

The officer seemed content that she wasn't hiding any weapons in the scraps of clothing she wore and he re-holstered his weapon.

"Uh...yeah...we're with the army. This is a classified area...you shouldn't be here."

"Wow...really? I'm really sorry." she tried to sound impressed and a bit fearful at the same time. Where the hell was Beachhead?

"Where are your clothes?" another trooper asked, looking around the shoreline.

"They're back there," she turned and motioned to a point on the other side of the pond.

"I'll take her to get them, sir." one of the viper's offered. The officer's head snapped around and glued him with a wilting look.

"You most certainly won't, soldier! You'll stay here and secure the area...I'll take her to get her clothes."

"Yes sir."

Cover Girl smiled slightly. Oh yes...this was working very well. She'd better not blow it now.

"And then you'll take me back to my group?"

"Yes."

"Oh thank you, sir!" she gushed, smiling at the officer. "If there's some way I can repay you..."

His brows went up at that, and she smiled sweetly at him. Poor Cobra troopers, she thought. Must be a lot like prison.

He pulled his pistol again and motioned her ahead of him. "Go on..."

She walked around the perimeter of the pond with him following. She made her way slowly, trying to give Beach as much time as she could. It wasn't difficult. The sticks and stones on the small path bit into her bare feet and made her pick her way carefully. The Officer was walking directly behind her and she felt the barrel of the pistol brush her back from time to time. She didn't dare make a move on him to disarm him or put him down. They weren't away from the eyes of his troop yet. She led him around the pond and then into a stand of trees. It was more thickly vegetated here and the forest got deeper the further south it went, leading into the Chequamegon Forest. They couldn't see the troopers anymore, but they could hear them. If she took the Officer out and he made a noise or accidently discharged his weapon, the others were only a short run away. She stopped in a small clearing and sighed.

"Now...which way was it?"

She heard an irritated grunt behind her and turned to face the Officer. He was glaring at her.

"Where are your clothes?" he was getting suspicious.

She looked around and then pointed suddenly to a thick area of the forest. "Oh...there they are...see them?"

He peered into the thick fauna and looked. "No."

"They're there...I hung them up on some branches so animals wouldn't carry them away. See them?"

He kept looking and shrugged. "Let's go and get them."

As he started forward, she saw a flash of darkness behind him. Fatigues and the barest glimpse of another masked face...but this one wasn't Cobra. Beachhead!

"Uh...no!" she said lamely, wincing slightly at the weak sound of the ploy.

The officer looked at her. "What?"

"Uh...I mean...I really want to thank you...for being so nice and all. And helping me find my friends again. Even my asshole of a boyfriend." she made a face and then smiled at him. His gaze went down the front of her shirt again, his eyes locking onto her chest. She could see the grin in his eyes as he moved closer. There was another flash of darkness, closer now. And then she was fighting to keep her gaze on the Officer's as Beachhead crept across the clearing towards them.

The Cobra had no idea anything was wrong...not even as Beachhead slipped the garrot around his neck. Cover Girl watched as the Cobra's eyes lifted and watched the thin line of the garrot coming down in front of his face. He looked at it calmly and with a puzzled gaze, as if to say 'huh...what's that?'. She had time to feel a slight sense of remorse for the misguided man before Beach jerked the line tight around the man's throat and took him down. He didn't make a sound. She leaned down and picked up the man's pistol. Beachhead finished the Cobra and then stood and looked around, listening intently.

"It's about time," she whispered quietly at him. The masked Joe turned his head and glanced at her, his gaze dropping almost unconciously over her wet and transparently clothed body.

"What the hell did you want me to do? Take on 10 armed vipers myself?" he retorted, jerking his gaze back up to her eyes. "Why the hell didn't you get out of there when I ordered you to?"

"I didn't have time...I did the only thing I could think of. I figured they didn't know me as a Joe."

"You're lucky Destro or Zartan wasn't with them."

She didn't answer...he was right. He leaned down and grabbed the Cobra by a wrist, dragging him into the brush slightly. This was supposed to be a covert mission. No engaging the enemy unless absolutely neccessary.

"Alright...let's get out of here before they notice this guy is taking too long."

"What? My clothes are back there!" she whispered furiously.

The Joe Sargeant glared at her. "Whose fault is that? If you'd have gotten out of there the first time I told you to, you wouldn't have had to improvise like that."

"But...aw shit...my gun...my new fucking boots!"

"You didn't leave any I.D. did you?"

"No sir...I'm not a complete idiot!"

He shook his head slightly at her, indicating his growing anger at her combativeness. They'd have it out when they got back to base, she knew. Or rather...she'd stand at attention while he dressed her down and lectured her. She was beginning to think Hawk had paired them up just because he knew Beach liked to yell, and that she just couldn't help being 'difficult'. She watched his eyes stray down to her chest again and was about to make a snide remark when he snarled at her.

"Where are your tags?"

"I broke the chain and dropped them in the lake when this guy ordered me to get out."

Beach relaxed slightly and glanced around again. "OK...let's go."

She hesitated, looking back towards the pond and her clothes longingly.

"Now, Corporal!...or do I have to carry you?"

"My new fucking boots...I just broke them in." she whined softly. His all too familiar glare silenced her and she turned and jogged off into the brush, wincing as the thick vegetation tore at her legs and the soles of her feet.

"What a great freakin' time for Snake and Scarlett to take leave," she muttered as she ran. She heard Beachhead following her closely, stopping now and then to look back and make sure they weren't being pursued. Oh, this was just fucking delightful! She was running through the forest, basically in her underwear, wet, with Beachhead. This was just grand! What a wonderful way to arrive back at base.

They passed a sign indicating the edge of park property and then had to hop a wire fence out of Cobra-land and back into the state's property. She braced one hand on the top wire and then threw her body nimbly over the fence and onto her feet on the other side. She glanced back to watch the Ranger clear the fence with ease and then she was jogging again. He directed her as they jogged, getting readings from Flint and Recondo who should have made it back to the helicopter by now and on their way to pick them up.

Soon they broke out into a large clearing and Beachhead halted her at the edge. They stood still and studied the area, listening. Nothing there.

"We found the clearing, Flint...what's your ETA?" Beachhead listened carefully and then glanced at the woman beside him.

"They're about 5 minutes out...we'll wait for them here."

"Yes sir." she muttered, folding her arms across her chest as his gaze dropped down her once more. She was sure he couldn't help it, but felt annoyed all the same.

"Christ, Sergeant...you act like you've never seen a nearly naked woman before." she tried to embarress him. She should have known it wouldn't work. His dark eyes met hers and held.

"Well, I sure as hell don't see it so much that I don't look when it's right in front of me."

He glanced back out at the forest, keeping watch. Courtney sighed and abandoned her protective pose. Oh, what the hell. She didn't have anything different from any other woman for god's sake. If he wanted to get a good look, let him. At least it wasn't Shipwreck or, god forbid, Clutch. Maybe Beach wasn't the most popular Joe, but he was serious and duty-driven and she respected him. And he wouldn't be caught dead making a cat-call or whistling at her.

"What gave you the bright idea to lose your clothes and pretend to swim in the pond?" he asked as he studied the forest.

"I don't know. It just came to me. I needed a place to hide. At first I thought they might not see me in there, but then I figured I could fool them long enough for you to get there."

At that, his masked head turned to look at her. "And what," he asked, narrowing his eyes at her. "did you think I was going to do?"

"I didn't really care...as long as I got out of there." she answered crossly. There was just something about this stoic, critical sergeant that brought out the worst in her and made her argue with him.

"Don't you have something I can wear in there?" she nodded towards the pack on his waist. "Even one of those shiny survival blankets or something?"

"No...I really didn't plan on one of my soldiers stripping down and taking a little swim today."

She rolled her eyes and sighed, deeply.

"You're riding a fine line right now, Corporal..." he said through gritted teeth. "Don't press me."

"Yes sir," she muttered "But you're not the one who has to walk off a helicopter and onto base in their underwear...their transparent underwear."

She could have sworn he smiled under that knit mask. Was he enjoying this? Irritation bit her sharply and she swallowed it.

"Why the hell did I wear a white t-shirt today?" she moaned quietly.

It was quiet for a moment and then Beachhead swore softly and turned, holding his rifle out towards her.

"Here...take it and watch the woods."

He thrust it into her hands and she took it, surprised, watching as he suddenly knelt down beside her, pulling his gloves off and unbuckling the shoulder holster of his sidearm.

"What? What are you doing?"

"Watch the woods, Corporal!"

She raised herself up slightly and brought the gun around, standing ready and watching the forest. She didn't see him glance up at her and then hesitate suddenly, his eyes widening as he took in the sight of her standing, barely clad, and holding his gun.

Goddamn, he thought, his eyes sliding down the muscled curve of her back and legs. The wet shirt hugged her curves and her flat, hard stomach, and left nothing to the imagination. Her auburn hair stuck to the nape of her neck and her cheeks, freed from it's restraint when she dove into the pond. She held the gun with familiarity and confidence and he crooked a brow. It was like a damned Soldier of Fortune calendar. When she glanced curiously back at him, he averted his eyes and worked on his kevlar vest again.

"Beachhead..."

"Watch the woods, Corporal...I don't want to be ambushed right now."

"Yes sir." she glanced back forward again. He jerked open the vest, working his arms from the uniform and then pulling it off. He reached back over his head and pulled the military green t-shirt from his torso and over his mask.

"Here." he held the t-shirt out to her and she looked back at it and then at him.

Her eyes widened and she knew her surprise was evident on her face. He knelt, bare-chested, his mask and his dog-tags the only things he still wore on his upper-body. He was holding his t-shirt out to her. She stared, gaping slightly, as her eyes slid over the muscled arm to the bared torso of the Sergeant. Holy shit...the guy was built. She shouldn't have been surprised, considering how dedicated the man was to PT, but...damn!

"Corporal!...Do you want it or not?"

"Huh?" she jerked her gaze back up to his eyes and looked at him, confused.

He held the shirt up, his eyes looking questioningly at her.

"Oh...yes!" she grabbed the shirt from him and glanced back at the woods as he began to pull on his uniform once again. She swallowed hard and had to forcibly keep her eyes from turning back to Beachhead. She glanced back again as he was buckling the final strap of his chest holster in place and then he reached out and took his gun back from her, almost reluctantly.

She drew the t-shirt on over her head and felt a measure of relief as it dropped mid-thigh and at least took the transparency out of the picture.

"Thanks, Beach," she said seriously, and he gave her a sidelong glance.

"Don't go all soft on me...you're still a huge pain in my ass."

She smiled at his back as he knelt down and studied the woods for Cobra troopers. He might be a bit over-the-top, terse, lacking in basic hygiene and social skills... but who knew? Beach had a heart.

The sound of a chopper sounded faintly in the distance and they ran to the middle of the clearing as it landed. Cover Girl followed Beachhead through the door and sighed as she dropped into her seat. Flint glanced back at her and then did a double take.

"What the hell...?"

Recondo looked back then too and she gritted her teeth as two pairs of eyes took her in and then widened. Recondo grinned at her.

"Cover Girl decided to take a little dip while we were down there." Beachhead explained, the amusement in his voice obvious.

"Well, I finished the mission didn't I?" she snapped, irritated. "It was the only thing I could think of, besides...I'm not a damned Ninja! Snake-Eyes and Scarlett should have been doing this!"

She folded her arms over her chest and glared as Beachhead began regalling them with the story. When she looked up again, Recondo was still grinning at her.

"What? You got something to say, Recondo?"

He held his hands up in acquiescence. "Not when you're looking at me like that, I don't."

She sat silently, glaring at them all as they flew towards base. After about an hour, when she had started to relax a little, she suddenly sniffed and looked over at Beachhead.

"When the hell did this thing get washed last?" she lifted the neckline of the t-shirt and sniffed it.

"Hey, it's clean! I just put it on this morning."

She frowned and he shrugged. "You don't want it...take it off."

Recondo turned in his seat again and grinned back at her.

"So...you're wearin' Beach's t-shirt,huh?"

"Oh for God's sake!" Courtney exclaimed, throwing her head down into one hand and shaking her head.



The walk into base was so much worse. Duke met them on the landing pad and stood in surprise, with wide eyes as Cover Girl stalked off the chopper and towards the hangar.

"Don't ask!" she growled as he opened his mouth. He closed it again and watched her walk by and into the whistles and calls of the other Joes. He turned and looked at the Joe's stepping from the helicopter.

"Please tell me this isn't going to involve tons of paperwork for me..."

Recondo smiled. "Not unless she runs into..." He was interrupted as a long, loud stream of feminine-voiced obscenities came flowing from the hangar followed by a harsh male yelp of pain.

"...Clutch." Duke finished for him, sighing.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^6 Afternote- Is it just me who suspects that Beach looks fairly fine under that bulky uniform of his?