Kristopher Allen, Adam Lambert and their son, Jesse Allen-Lambert were standing at LAX airport with the other families of Kris' troup mates, saying goodbye to each other.

Kris was leaving his husband and son to go to battle in Iraq for their home country, America.

Adam isn't really sure who has been crying the most, he or his 5 year old son.

He's just going to miss Kris, so fucking much...

Although they have been married for 6 years straight now, Kris still knows how to bring butterflies to Adam's stomache. And much more than butterflies too...

They were hugging and kissing each other, Jesse almost pressed in between them, not wanting to let go of each other.

Suddenly, Kris felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned his head to look into his best friend, and fellow captain of their troup, Matt Giraud's eyes.

" I'm sorry I have to break you guys up," Matt said with a little sadness in his voice, " But general Desai says it's time to leave."

Adam clinged on even more to Kris' shirt, " I don't want you to go."

Kris let out a breathles little laugh, " You'll have to, if you don't want to squeeze the longs out of our little boy."

Adam looked down and saw Jesse try to squirm out from between Kris and his entangled bodies.

Adam quickly stepped backwards and held out his arm to catch his stumbling son.

" Thanks, papa." Jesse said to Adam, then he asked nervously, " Do I have to say goodbye to daddy now?"

Adam nodded sadly, " Yeah, I'm afraid you have to."

Kris bend down his knees and opened his arms, Jesse gladly took the invitation and wrapped his little arms around hiss daddy's neck.

" I'm gonna miss you, my little boy. So fucking much."

" You'll call me, won't you daddy?" Jesse asked softly, tears already gathering up in his eyes again.

Kris had to try his hardest to bite back his own tears, as he whispered, " Yeah, I will. I'll write too."

They hugged each other tight one last time, then they let go and Kris stood up straight again, looking at his husband with a sad smile on his face.

Adam didn't need a second to wrap his arms around Kris again and bend down his head a little to burrow his head in the crook of Kris' neck.

They pulled away after Matt impatiently cleared his throat, but still kept their eyes locked on each other.

" Make sure you come back, safe and sound." Adam said, his eyes boring into Kris'.

" Of course I'll come back safe and sound. I won't go down that easily you know, I'm a tough army guy."

Kris put on his fierce face, trying to make Adam laugh, but it didn't work.

" Promise me."

" I promise, Adam. I'll be back before you know it."

He gave Adam one last peck on his lips, ruffled his hand lovingly through Jesse's hair, then he turned around and walked away, his best friend Matt at his side.

" You take care of him, Matt!" Adam called after them and Matt turned around with a smile on his face.

" Of course I will, Adam. See you when we get back."

Then they walked further a little before Kris looked over his shoulder to see his husband and son still standing at the same place he left them.

He blew them a kiss and smiled when he saw Adam pretending to catch it and blew him one back. Kris pretended to catch it too, waved one more time and then he walked through the boarding gate.

Away from his family...

The last two months had been very hard for both Adam and Jesse. Kris being gone for so long wasn't something they were used to, and now that he was, they had to find away to cope with it.

Jesse, who usually wasn't much of a crybaby, except on the day that Kris had left but that was only normal, cried an awful lot during those months.

Not to mention the times he acted like a completely spoiled brat, screaming at Adam for completely no reason and kicking his toys and the furniture around the house.

Adam tried his best to react calmly to Jesse's outbursts of anger, he knew he was only missing his daddy, and Adam knew the feeling, 'cause he missed his husband more than anything in this world.

Kris hadn't called, like he had promised to, but he had send a couple of letters to them. Telling them how cold and lonely it was up there, and how much he missed them. How much he wanted to get back home to them...

Adam listened to the news on the radio every day, and in the evening he watched the news on the television with Jesse on his lap.

" Papa?" Jesse asked, and Adam knew what was coming 'cause Jesse asked the same question every night.

" Yes, sweetheart?"

" Daddy is going to come home soon, isn't he?"

Adam smiled at his son, " Of course he is, Jesse. And then he'll play with you until you're tired of playing for your whole life."

Jesse giggled, " Then he has to play with me for a long long time."

" Oh, he will. As soon as he's done defending our country, he's gonna spend all of his time at home with us. We'll have him back soon, baby. You don't have to worry, your daddy is incredibly smart and strong, it's not easy to take him down and I should know."

" Papa!" Jesse exclaimed, holding his hands on his ears dramatically like Adam had just told him his whole sex life with his daddy.

Adam laughed and tickled his boy until he begged him to stop.

Then it was time for Jesse to go to bed and Adam tucked him in. Then, right before he left the room, he put in the C.D. Kris had recorded himself once in the C.D.-player, and he let the music softly float through the room. Because he knew this was the only way to get Jesse to sleep.

After a few more hours, Adam went to bed himself. He changed in to his pajama pants, without shirt 'cause he hated that thing, laid down in the bed and took the photo of him and Kris of the nightstand and held it to his chest, close to his heart. Then he brought it back up, stroked with his thumb over Kris' face before he kissed the picture, right on Kris' lips.

He put his earbuds in and scrolled in his ipod songlists until he found Kris' songs and pressed play.

Just like his son, Kris' voice was the only thing that could bring him to sleep.

Late in the thirth month that Kris was gone, Adam hadn't recieved any letters anymore from his husband, and he was slightly getting worried about him.

He didn't show this to Jesse though, 'cause the last thing that kid needed was more stress in house then there already was.

It was a beatuful sunny day that day, and Adam was bringing out a box with more toys for Jesse to the terrace, when he saw a big black car with a little American flag waving in the wind at the front of the car, and Adam stopped death in his tracks.

He saw Matt stepping out of the car, one arm in a sling, the other one leaning heavily on the door of the car.

When he finally looked up at Adam, and Adam saw the defeated look on his face, he dropped the box with toys and slumped down on the floor, resting his back and head against the wall of his house.

This wasn't happening... This couldn't be happening...

Not him... Not Kris...

That's when the tears started to pour down his cheeks and he buried his head into his hands;

"Papa?" Jesse spoke softly, standing confused at Adam's side, " Papa, why are you crying?"

Adam pulled his head out of his hands and looked at hi son, tears still streaming downn his face.

" Your daddy is-" Adam cut himself off, he just couldn't say it,not for now at least, " Your daddy won't be coming home anymore, Jesse..."

Although Jesse didn't really understand what it meant, he knew it couldn't be good.

He sat down on his papa's lap, buried his face into his chest and cried.

He didn't really know why he was crying, but he was pretty sure he had a very good reason for it.

They both just sat there for what seemed like hours. That's until Matt came up to them, helped them to stand up and lead them inside of the house.

All three of them had lost someone they loved...

A best friend...

A husband...

A father...

All of them were equally painful, and neither of them knew if they could ever get over this terrible loss.