They were hiding out amongst the trees, far enough away from the castle to be able to spot its weaknesses, the gates less guarded, the deeper corners draped in shadow. They had left their cloaks behind. Silly thing to head into a robbery dragging those things around, slowing one down or getting stuck on a spike at the most inconvenient times. Ludicrous. This wasn't a battle where one had to showcase its colours, proudly fight in the name of some lord or other. This had to be sneaky, quick. No heavy armour, no pretty ornaments or shields.
Their weapons were drawn, arrows peeking out beneath the leaves and she with her sword, just waiting for the signal.
"Nervous?" She shifted her gaze to the right, her body still in place, unmoving, silent, to look at her leader—she never thought she'd call anyone that again, had refused to ever be under the command of men who considered her inferior to them, but this was different, wasn't it? he was different—scarcely able to distinguish his features under the moonlight.
"I've fought alongside skilled soldiers in a war where I was the only woman," she whispered. "I've seen the contempt in their eyes, the disgust in some. I've been alienated, not just by them, but by my family as well, by people I've known my entire life. I've had to prove myself more times than I think is fair. Made it rather difficult for me to meet anyone new and look at them without suspicion," she added with a smirk, remembering he'd witnessed firsthand her defensive stance towards strangers, he himself having been one to her not too long ago. "But being here, now, for the first time I feel like I belong," she admitted, her voice cracking and her grin broadening. Stop, this is not the time for tears. "I'm not nervous." She turned her head towards him, hoping he could see the mischievous glint in her eyes, "I can't wait."
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The men were sitting around the fire, laughing, drinking, every so often someone would spontaneously burst into song, everyone in high spirits over a job well-done. Mulan wasn't sitting aside, alone as she had been used to, but among them, Robin on her right and the friar on her left with Little John across from her in the middle of a story, the one where they'd faced a mighty griffin and he'd barely escaped with his life. "Would've lost my arm if it hadn't been for darling Marian," he said.
She glanced at Robin then, noticed his head slightly bowed and a slow smile on his lips. She almost envied him, being able to recall a memory of a loved one no longer with crushing misery. Mulan longed for the day she could think of the one she'd left behind without sadness, think of how happy she must be, how complete her life must seem now (how she probably never thought of her at all, why would she?).
Robin saw her observing him, not yet daring to ask what she was so curious about. But he didn't mind, seemed glad to have found someone new to whom he could tell this story to.
"When I first banded the Merry Men," he began quietly so as not to disturb the others still engrossed in John's retelling, no matter how often they'd heard it, "Marian was adamant about being of use. She didn't want to sit on the sidelines, wait around for us and worry all day. So she took it upon herself to learn all about which herbs had healing properties and which to stay away from, which wounds required immediate attention, how to shield ourselves from getting mortally wounded. She trained and soon became her very own physician," he told her proudly and she again felt that fleeting envy resurface, thinking of this woman so lucky to have been loved so fiercely. "She's treated and brought back from the brink of death more of my men than I can remember," he continued. "She knew how to remain calm, make them feel safe in her presence. They would always tell me how they wouldn't focus on the pain, but on her voice, how it soothed them, comforted them."
"She sounds like quite the woman."
"She was. She was the bravest I ever knew." Mulan could see his tears beginning to fall but, with practiced ease, he stood and went to add logs to the fire and regained his seat beside her. Unexpectedly, forgetting the sorrow that threatened to overtake him a moment ago, he chuckled, "she would have liked you, you know. She would often pester me about recruiting more women. Said we needed a woman to keep us in check, someone with the good sense to keep us from doing something reckless. Seems she was right," he conceded and lightly bumped his shoulder with her own in praise, "your plan worked splendidly. To be quite truthful, it almost made me miss the days when doing this job was a challenge."
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Everyone had gone back to their tents to sleep but for the two of them, finishing the last of the ale, trying to keep the fire alive for a little while longer.
"So how does it feel being one of us?"
"To be honest, I keep waiting for you to mention some weird ritual or blood oath I have to take."
"I won't if you don't want to," he laughed, before resuming in a more serious tone, but careful, as if afraid to offend her, "I just want to make sure that you're here because you believe in the work that we do. Not because you're running from something. Someone. If you do believe in our cause, then know that you have a family here, for the rest of your life if you so choose. You'll find that missing piece eventually." At her questioning look and furrowed brow, he smiled once more, dimples on full display, "Love?"
"Is this you flirting with me?" she teased.
"Somehow I don't think I'm your type," he replied with a wink making her cough loudly into her mug. With flushed cheeks, she stared at him, how did he know that? He was still smiling at her, gently, not teasing anymore, just smiling. Reassuring her, offering friendship. She gladly took it.
"What about you? Are you still looking for love?"
"I don't know. I had love. Real, true love. Maybe… maybe that's all I get. Maybe that's enough," he muttered with a pained sigh.
"I don't believe that. I can't believe that. I've loved more deeply than I ever thought I would. And she didn't love me the same way. How unfair would it be for that to be the only love I ever know? I have to believe there's someone else for me out there. A second chance. Just as there is for you. One day, you'll meet someone and you won't even realize it but she'll be everything you're looking for."
"I hope so," he breathed shyly, as if saying it out loud would be tempting fate. "And I hope the same for you. Just don't fall in love with the same woman I do."
Now it was her turn to laugh and, for the rest of the hour at least, she forgot about her past, her troubles and just enjoyed being with her friend. With her family.
