A/N: A compilation of fics I made for Rivetra Week 2014. Again, some might have seen these on Tumblr. (I just have nothing new.)
Her hair was longer back then.
It was so long it nearly reached her elbows. But of course, she pulled it into a ponytail during training and expedition. She did her hair neatly, unlike Hanji who'll always have some locks of her hair pulled down.
Sometimes he wondered how she took care of her hair. Having that long kind of hair must be taken care of seriously. But she was a soldier and she didn't care how her hair looked. Or so it seemed.
However, she didn't seem troubled with that thing hanging at the back of her head, moving when she turned her head. When the training or expedition was over, there was a few strand of loose hair hanging in front of her eye. And it was kind of annoying for him to push it behind her ear.
He wouldn't admit it, though.
The first thought crossed his mind when they first met was, how Isabel would like her. Petra was gentle, nice, he could see it in the way she treated everyone around her, with smile and all. If Isabel were still alive, she'd have always been Petra's side, completely ignoring him and even Farlan.
That was, if Isabel and Farlan were still alive.
Isabel never got a chance to befriend with other girl.
He saw her training; he noted that she still had to work harder to cut, but she was fast at using 3DMG. She was small and she knew how to use it. She also was getting along pretty well with other soldiers; she trusted them enough to work together to kill Titans.
And that was enough for him.
He realized she may not good with hand-in-combat, but it didn't matter anyway, he needed her during expedition to kill some Titans.
But once he got used to watch her, he continued doing it. When he stepped inside, he scanned the room to see if she was there. And he often found her laughing at some jokes her friend telling. Or chewing her food carefully while nodding at whatever her friend saying. Sometimes she caught his glance, but she always quickly looked away.
He knew that his presence could make someone uncomfortable. He knew he was pretty intimidating. But would it be so weird that he didn't want her to be afraid of him?
He wrote down her name on the list of soldiers he wantes to be in his squad.
Petra Ral.
There.
—-
"This expedition will also—hopefully—show us if they're worth to be in your squad, Levi." Erwin said as he held the paper in his hand. He glanced at it, as if seeing the names again, making sure he was right.
"How? By seeing if they fucking made it back alive or not?" He looked up, seeing those blue eyes of Erwin, the one he trusted the most. He gave his loyalty to him, not because he was his Commander, but because he gave him the chance. Another chance to make up the decision he made.
Erwin understood how it was like to survive, from Titans. From humanity. From anything.
Erwin looked away. "Well," he cleared his throat. "It's more likely they'll survive, after all."
Most of all, Erwin understood him without Levi having to say anything.
—-
He wanted her so badly to survive. He didn't know why, he just did. Maybe because he wanted to see her smile again, or hearing her laugh, or maybe when she survived, he'd talk to her and she'd see that he might not be as intimidating as he looked.
And she did. He congratulated her, and asked if she didn't mind to be the only female in his squad. She shook her head and smiled.
The following day, she cut her hair short.
"I've heard that cutting your hair short can throw your bad luck away for a new start." She explained when he asked her. "I'm joining your squad, that's really a great and new start, Corporal." She smiled again and he wondered why she even survived the expedition.
It wasn't that he thought she wouldn't have made it; he wanted her to badly he couldn't understand why. But he had been taught that anything good in this life wouldn't live long.
Because in this cruel world where anything bad always wins, there's no place left for the good.
—-
He had hoped she'd have made it, but there was also another part of him that wished she wouldn't. He didn't want her to see what would become of this world, and he didn't want her to take her part.
He looked down at her face, her eyes opening but not looking at anywhere. He reminded himself it was for her own good; she didn't deserve to live in this cruel world.
He heard another roar.
And he couldn't feel anything else but the cold in his heart.
