In many ways, unwise love is the truest love. Reason does not enter into it. Anyone can love a thing because. That's as easy as putting a penny in your pocket. But to love something despite. To know the flaws and love them too. That is rare and pure and perfect. –Patrick Rothfuss.
Piper was late, as always. She was already making excuses in her head as the cab pulled over next to the café she'd agreed to meet her best friend in. She hurried to check her make-up for the last time before paying the cab driver and stepping out.
There was a blinding sun shining above and the air felt thick; humid, with no wind to relieve the mind-numbing heat. It was lunch time and the air was suffocating, her choice of clothes for this day not helping at all - god damn long sleeves. She rushed inside the café, immediately spotting Polly sitting next to a window. She was playing with a cup of coffee between her hands, with an annoyed look on her face but Piper didn't even make it half-way before Polly saw her and her eyes lit up with a huge smile.
"You bitch!" She jumped out of her seat and hurried to give her a bear hug, her arms locking around her neck. Piper startled at the sudden movement and winced when she felt her grip but hugged her back and waited until she pulled away. God, she was so happy to see her.
"Hi, Pols. Sorry I'm late, the cab-"
"Oh, forget it. Pipe-" She grabbed her hand and squeezed, looking at her with a rare emotion in her eyes and Piper knew she meant this. "I've missed you so much." But it only lasted a second and she went back to demanding right away. She sat back down and gestured at her to follow. "Now, sit. You're not leaving until you tell me everything that's happened to you since the last time we talked. Every. Single. Detail." She punctuated gravelly. Piper suppressed a sigh because she knew this was bound to happen but even so, she'd managed to keep a tiny sliver of hope that she wouldn't have to lie to her best friend. She sat down and played with the scruff of her sleeves. Polly frowned and kicked her shin and Piper whipped her head up, eyes widened. "Sorry." Apologized Polly, frowning deeper. "You okay, Pipe? What's with you?" She leant forward and gestured at her neck, a yellowing bruise poking out from under her t-shirt. "Is that a bruise?"
"Yeah, I fell the other day." She said nonchalantly, pulling the scruff on her t-shirt up to cover it.
"How do you even get a bruise there. I swear you've got a knack for tripping. You're too clumsy for your own good, you're gonna end up breaking something."
Piper laughed faintly. "Well, I survived!" She gestured behind her. "Hey, I'm going to go ge-"
"I already ordered you one." Piper gave her a questioning look and she rolled her eyes impatiently. "A coffee." She specified, "I told the waitress to bring it when you got here." She raised her hand, getting the waitress's attention and pointed at Piper. She turned her attention back to her friend. "Do you want anything else? A muffin?"
"Uh, no, I'm good. Thanks, Pol." Piper's stomach was twisting, trying to get the words out. Polly was waiting. "So, what have you been up to?"
Polly widened her eyes, disbelievingly. She shook her head and let out a laugh. "Are you serious? I've left you hundreds of messages in the last couple of months. Not even one goddamn call, Piper. 'Hey Polly, I'm alive so don't shit you pants or anything.' That would have been better than literally ignoring me for all this time!" Piper pursed her lips, but remained silent knowing she wasn't done yet. "I went by your place too. No one answered. I called your job; they said you weren't working there anymore." Piper was chewing on her lip with a tiny frown on her face, eyes trained on the table and her hands twitching and Polly lost it. "Are you even listening to me right now? What the fuck happened to you, Piper?"
Piper winced at the rise in her tone and fear crept up on Polly's face.
"Oh god. Oh my god, Piper." She looked up and recognized genuine concern on her friend's face. Disappointment too. She began shaking her head, denying what Polly was obviously thinking. "Please tell me you didn't-"
"No!" She interrupted her and Polly was taken aback but Piper plough on. "Of course I didn't. I promise."
"Okay." She raised her hands, defensively. "Then, what?" She insisted.
A waitress showed up, and placed the coffee in front of her. Piper thanked her and took a sip, feeling the weight of Polly's stare on her. She sighed. Slumped further down in her seat.
"I'm sorry I didn't call you back. It's just… It's been hard, lately. I mean, hard-er. I- I lost my job. Things got a little out of control for a while but I'm fine now, I just… needed time to get back up on my feet." She couldn't look Polly in the eye. Although what she was saying was technically true, she knew it was bullshit. It had all the wrong angles. But Polly didn't seem to notice and her eyes softened.
"Why didn't you tell me? I could have helped, Piper."
"I know. I just felt like it was something I needed to do for myself. But it's all behind now, I even got a new job and… things are fine." She gave her a tight smile, slightly arching her eyebrows and shrugged. Polly rolled her eyes and her tone went back to normal, relief washing over Piper at Polly's drop of the subject.
"Fine. How can I stay mad at you with those puppy eyes?"
Piper laughed and it felt so good; she didn't even remember the last time she'd laughed earnestly and it was just so nice having her friend back.
"You can't." She shrugged again, this time cockily and Polly muttered shut up before taking a large gulp of her coffee. She set down the mug and started talking about her life with funny quips and dramatic exclamations like her best friend did and Piper could feel her stomach twisting almost painfully from laughter. It was all familiar and easy banter and it took a while for Polly to run out of things to make fun of Pete for and when that happened, she dug something out from her purse excitedly.
"Here. I brought you a present."
"Really? What is it? Give it to me." Piper said, stretching out her hand and Polly rolled her eyes, withholding the gift.
"Why am I friends with such an uncivilized specimen?"
"Best friends with." Corrected Piper letting out a laugh.
"How do you know I haven't replaced you in all of this time?"
Piper stretched across the table and took the rectangular shaped present from her friend's hand as she replied, "Please. You could not find a best friend like me anywhere in this world. You wouldn't know what to do without me."
"A rude, antisocial and waspy bitch?" Piper shrugged helplessly and Polly continued in a lower voice, "But yeah. You're right."
Piper stopped trying to rip the paper apart and looked at her friend.
"I'm really sorry, Pols."
"It's fine. I mean no, "She shook her head." it's not fine which is why I forbid you from ever doing it again but… Okay."
Piper smiled. "Okay."
"Now open the present and try to tell me I'm not the best friend ever."
She finally tore it apart and watched the biggest and bluest chunk of soap she'd ever seen.
"Soap? You got me soap?"
"No. I made you soap." She smiled proudly and Piper gasped.
"You made this? How?"
"It's actually really simple, I learned a while back and now I just do it for fun."
"Wow." Piper was looking from the soap to her friend, astounded, and Polly rolled her eyes.
"Don't look so surprised. I'm great at many things. Now, what are you waiting for? Smell it."
Piper took the soap to her nose and moaned loudly.
"Oh my god, Polly, this smells like an orgasm."
Polly laughed, scrunching up her nose.
"Weirdo."
"You wanna smell my orgasm? Here, smell it." She shoved it up her nose and Polly pulled back, laughing.
"Ew, you're so gross, I don't wanna smell your orgasm. Jesus, now every time I make that scent I'll think about your orgasms."
Piper laughed again, taking the soap back to her nose and took in a long breath.
"Orgasms are nice. And this is really fucking good, Polly. Thank you. You are definitely the best."
"I know." She shrugged. Piper wrapped the soap up and put it in her bag. She then rubbed her hands together and took them to her face, breathing in happily and then resting her head on her palm with a satisfied grin. They ordered another piece of pie, the last one, they promised, and resumed their catching up session.
"So, how is Aaron?" Polly mumbled, while chewing on a piece of pie.
Piper paused. "He's fine." She answered, nodding. Polly stared at her and Piper shoved a huge piece of pie into her mouth. She hid her hands under the table, running them down her thighs.
"He's fine? Just that?" Polly hesitated. "You're still together, right?"
Piper nodded again and picked up her fork.
"Yes. We are."
Polly relaxed again. "Is he still writing?"
"Yep."
"You could both come for dinner one day. We haven't seen Aaron in what, like half a year? Pete could use a guy to rant about sports. God knows I can't fulfill that task any longer." She laughed and Piper hummed, her mouth stuffed with pie. She bobbed her head along, agreeing with her. The pie was over, it was getting dark outside and Piper knew she had to go. Polly sighed.
"Do you have to go already?"
Piper managed a half smile and a nod.
"Okay, well, you better keep in touch, Pipe. Because if you don't I swear I'll knock your door down if I have to or call the police and have the dogs tracking you down." Piper let out a laugh mostly at the irony of her choice of scenarios and stood up, Polly imitating her. She grabbed her purse and stepped forward, hugging her best friend tightly. Her familiar smell put her at ease again and she managed an honest smile before pulling away and saying goodbye. She could feel her phone buzzing in her purse but she made no attempt of pulling it out. They said goodbye again outside of the café and Piper didn't take her eyes off her friend until she left on her cab. Sighing, she made her way down the street, looking for a grocery's shop to stop by. There were some things she needed to pick up.
In the cart she threw some milk and cereal, candy bars, apples and a few bananas too. Chips for Aaron and ketchup. Aaron loved ketchup. She walked, knowing where she was going but not acknowledging it; not until she found herself in front of the infinite vodka bottles. There were so many. So many brands, so many types, so many flavors. Her hands clenched, her throat drying and she gritted her teeth.
She kept walking after a painful moment.
She stood in front of the beers and stared. She stared until the names didn't make sense; until she could find the courage to remind herself that there was no losing this battle. She couldn't add to the misery in her life. She wouldn't. Her stomach was twisting again, and she shut her eyes tight for a second, gathering the strength to walk away.
Everyday there was a decision being made.
She walked to the cashier and paid for her things. She left with heavy bags in her hands, and they were weighing her down more than they actually should. The cab pulled over next to her. She gave him the directions to her house and slumped down in her seat, her nails digging into her palm from the grip she had on the bags. Piper wished she'd hugged Polly longer.
The cab pulled over in her street and she got out, standing on the sidewalk for a second, staring up. Up at the dingy looking building that was her home; although Piper more felt it like a cage. Prison bars locking her inside of that fucking dump. Cracks on the side, dirty windows, rooms barely big enough to fit in a bed, and everything was just so grey. Dirty color. Piper hated it. She entered the building and took the stairs. Three floors. The hallway to her apartment was narrow and Piper felt like she was suffocating already, the air running out of her lungs. She hesitated outside of her door for another moment, taking in a deep breath but she was startled when she heard a loud clank from inside, followed by an even louder curse. She clenched her fist around the door knob with her key inside and pushed open the door.
"Hi, sweetie."
Her boyfriend was in the kitchen, to her immediate left while the living room was to her right, a small room with a crappy and stained red-ish couch and a small tv on top of what was supposed to be a desk. Their bedroom was at the end of a short hall, with the only bathroom inside. Despite Piper's attempts of brightening up the place, it still looked unkempt and dark; and every time she looked at the paper wall she found herself thinking of the things her mother would have to say about it. Red and white, candle-like patterns that time had shadowed made it look yellowy. Not that the white and yellow tiles helped either, and the windows weren't big enough to lighten up the place, so light bulbs were turned on almost 24/7. The kitchen was a tiny rectangle where only two people fit at the same time and they only had an oven and a microwave and it had taken Piper a whole day to get the grease out of the sink. So yes, in conclusion, the place was a dump.
But it was the only home she had.
Aaron looked up from the floor, all messy brown hair and eager equally brown eyes, with a pan in his hand. He placed it in the counter and gave her a sideways smile.
"Hey. Where you've been?"
"With Polly. Remember I told you?"
"Oh, yeah. Right."
Piper walked to the counter and slowly placed the bags on top. Aaron stretched across the counter and grabbed hold of her hips, placing a kiss on her lips and Piper smiled faintly against his mouth. He pulled away after a second, still smiling at her.
"I was looking for a lighter, but I can't seem to find anything in this house."
Piper laughed softly and went around the counter, reaching for the top left drawer and pulling a lighter out. She lifted it, giving him a desperate look and he chuckled.
"You're magical."
"It's always there, you're just lazy."
"I am not." He said, looking offended and Piper shook her head and gave him the lighter but he dismissed it, reaching for her instead. He pressed his mouth to hers again, pushing her gently backwards, to the kitchen. Piper raised her hands, with her palms against his chest and kissed back, closing her eyes and relaxing against him for a second. He hummed and Piper giggled. She was the first to pull away though, putting space between them with her hands and sneaking through his side. He groaned, turning around to face her as he leaned in the counter. He stretched his hands even though Piper was well out of his reach and she let out a light laugh.
"You're cute." She said, starting to put away the groceries.
"Come here."
Piper sighed and mumbled, "you're putting them away, then, "as she strolled to his side. He wrapped his arms around her, placing his hands just above her lower back and she buried her head in his neck. "I'm so tired."
"Polly tired you out?"
Piper snorted a laugh. "She can be very tiresome yes, but no, I had to take the morning shift so I could meet up with her."
"Ah, right." He hummed again, understanding and after a second, "I sold a piece today."
"Really? That's great, honey." She wound her arms around his middle and ran them up and down his back soothingly. The stupor was falling over her but it didn't seem to be doing the same for Aaron. He pulled away just enough so he could kiss her and when she ended it, he ducked down to pepper her neck with kisses. With a whine she backed down. "I really am tired, babe. I need to go to bed."
He sighed loudly and pursed his lips but he didn't insist. Instead, he eagerly reached for the bags and Piper began tying her hair up in a bun and headed towards the bedroom.
"I'll go take a show-"
"Wait." There was ruffling of plastic bags, something fell to the ground and Piper could hear the bouncing. An apple. "Where is the beer?"
She didn't stop walking when she asked, "What?"
"Piper." He said, angrily. She halted. Sighed and turned around. He had a grimace on his face and his voice was raspier when he continued, "Where is the beer?"
"I didn't bring beer."
His face contorted, going from sweet and at ease to rage in less than a second. He took the pan again and Piper's heart sped up but then he let out a rough breath and put it down with a loud clank.
"Why didn't you bring beer?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't know I had to." He didn't answer immediately and Piper turned around slowly, her heart still thumping painfully against her ribcage. There was another loud clank, as if he dropped the pan again but Piper didn't turn around. She kept walking and reached for the handle of their bedroom.
She was a few inches short.
A hand wrapped around her wrist and she was spun around roughly, her face inches from his.
"You knew there weren't any beers left."
"I- I forgot, Aaron."
"I called you to remind you. I left you a message." He insisted. His hand was no longer holding her wrist but she was trapped between him and the door.
"I didn't see it, I'm sorry."
He groaned. "Tonight's the game, how am I supposed to watch it without any beers?"
Piper swallowed and cautiously leaned forward to rest her hands on his chest again.
"Maybe that's a good thing, Aaron. Remember we agreed a long time ago that we'd try to stop drinking?"
He frowned. "We also said we would never judge each other."
"I'm not judging, I'm just trying to help-"
"Hey, hey." He interrupted sharply, stepping even closer. Piper always wondered how he could go from zero to 100 in a matter of seconds. "I don't need your help. Don't talk to me like you're superior just because you stopped drinking."
Piper sighed deeply and cast her eyes down.
"I don't think I'm superior to you, Aaron. I just want us to be happy and-"
"You're not happy?"
She shut her eyes and muttered, "I am, but- Look, I just want the best for you. For us."
"Look at me." He spat and she winced but raised her head. His eyes were dark and Piper felt dread wrap around her heart.
"I'm not an alcoholic anymore. There's nothing wrong with a few beers."
"Aaron-" She sighed, frustrated and for the second time today, took the decision against her better judgment. Maybe it was the hopefulness the meeting with Polly had instilled in her or maybe she was just sick and tired of her life. Whatever it was, it gave her courage to try one more time. "You reek of vodka. We said no more hard drinks, and it's not the first time. That's why I didn't buy the beer, okay, I'm just worried about-"
"Stop it!" He yelled. "You. You, Piper." He spat, pointing an angry finger at her. "You're still as fucked up as the day we met, alcoholic or not."
"Don't talk to me like that." She said in a small voice, widening her eyes with hurt but that only seemed to get him more riled up. He clenched his teeth and Piper could tell he was losing it, and-
It all happened in one second.
She tried to back away, her breathing becoming ragged from fear as she searched blindly for the door handle behind her back but before she could find it, a sharp, searing pain in her left cheek forced her to stop. Her body hit the door, a cry leaving her mouth. She covered her cheek with both her hands and lowered her head. Her eyes sealed shut; she stayed silent, her whole body shaking.
"Don't tell me what to do." He growled through still clenched teeth. A hot, trembling hand wrapped around her neck and Piper yelped. "And tomorrow, get the beer." He said with threat in his voice. He walked away and began pacing the living room with his hands behind his head. He was breathing heavily, anger and alcohol still seeping through his pores. Piper fumbled behind her until she opened the door and stumbled into the bathroom, locking the door with shaky hands. She stood in front of the mirror with her fists clenched, her head bowed and gritting her teeth to stop herself from making any sounds. In no time, he was outside of the bathroom, rapping his knuckles on the door, muttering half assed, stuttered apologies mixed between curses. Piper could hear the regret and fear in his voice. She ignored him and the tears in her face when she looked up, instead focusing to inspect the reddened blotch on her face, assessing the damage.
This one was going to leave a mark.
Piper guessed she wouldn't be seeing Polly for a while.
