What's It Like To Be a Nobody?- Xemnas (Mansex!)

The host of this story me, OrgyMemberXVII, walks onto the stage wearing an outfit with a bunch of sequins. "Oh, so you want to know what it's like to be a Nobody? Good thing for you, Organization XIII is going to show you through a series of their most memorable memories of being Nobodys! We are going to start with Xemnas. So, Manse- I mean Xemnas, what's it like to be a Nobody?" Xemnas growls at almost being called Mansex and comes onto the stage and snatches the microphone from me and glares as I walk off the stage.

For me, being a Nobody is kinda hard. I mean, I got no idea who the hell I am. And you wanna know what's even worse than not knowing who I am? My name. In case you haven't noticed, my name is a perverted anagram. I still remember the day everyone found out. It was a normal day in The World That Never Was when I noticed that Number XIII wasn't out on his mission but instead in the Grey Area, I decided to investigate.

"Number XIII! How come you aren't out on your mission?" I practically shouted. I probably shoudn't have because he jumped like ten feet in the freakin' air!

"Oh! Superior, you scared me! I finished my mission early so I thought I'd lounge around in the Grey Area until someone got back from their mission."

"Why don't you hang out with me? I'm pretty bored here without Saix."

"Awww, someone's missing his love puppy~" Number XIII teased as I snapped my head up.

"What was that XIII?"

"Nothing Superior! Nothing, I said nothing!" He said literally waving it off. Saix and I may have feelings about each other but at night if you stay up and listen closely you can hear some AkuRoku going on in the middle of the night. Yea, that's right. Axel and Roxas are doing it! Anyways, we went to the entertainment room to play with the Wii because I've never played with it before and whether I caught him in the Grey Area or not he was gonna go there either way. Some time later we stop because we were playing the bowling game and I kept losing so I got pissed and destroyed the device. After I broke it, Roxas was cuddling with its remains in the corner.

"No! My poor baby, my baby... I always thought that either Xigbar was gonna shoot you, Xaldin was gonna stab you, Vexen would take you apart, Lexaeus would smash you, Zexion would just do nothing and ignore you, Saix would through you out the window, Axel would light you on fire, Demyx would dump water on you, Luxord would gamble you away, Marluxia would turn you into something decoratrive, Larxene would stomp on you or Xion would smash you to bits with her keyblade! I never thought that Xemnas would kill you! My baby... my baby!" Taking pity on the young Nobody, I walked over to see if he was alright.

"Number XIII, are you okay?" I touched his shoulder and he just got up and looked at me with crazy eyes and I think I tried not to pee myself.

"No! You killed my baby! I'm gonna avenge him! I'll get back at you Xemmy! Just wait and see!" Roxas shouted running to his room. Later everyone returned so hopefully, with Saix by my side, I won't face Roxas' wrath alone. At dinner I noticed that everyone, especially Saix, couldn't keep a straight face. Finally I got fed up with the looks I was getting and I slammed my silverwear on the table and shot up.

"Okay! What the hell happened before now that has you all in hysterics?!"

Demyx fell out of his chair laughing.

"Oh my God! I can't breathe!" He laughed as he wheezed and crawled away. That was weird. When I woke up the next morning, all the Nobodies were in the Grey Area, seems they haven't forgotten whatever it is they are laughing about.

"Hey look guys! It's Mansex!" When they looked at me, they just kept laughing. What the hell did Axel just call me? Mansex? Oh that little piece of blond shit I call a Nobody! I am going to end his existence! I race to XIII's room to find him. When I open the door, Roxas is sleeping so peacefully that he looks really adorable, but if I wasn't so mad at him right now, I'd take a picture to get back at him. I poke Roxas and when he doesn't budge, so I push him off the bed.

"Dammit Axel! I'm still sore from last night! At least let me rest!" Roxas thinks I'm Axel and when he sees me, he smirks.

"So Mansex, how do you like my payback?"

"Like it? I hate it! How can you do this to me?"

"What goes around, comes around!" Roxas said getting dressed.

"Just tell everyone to stop calling me Mansex." I shudder at the perverted anagram of my name. I hate it as much as I hate Number XIII right now.

"You know I don't have the authority you have to stop the others from calling you that." Roxas said as he began to leave, but I grabbed his hand.

"How did you know the anagram anyways?"

"Let's just say that Mr. Nobody shouldn't guard your diary anymore." Roxas smirked as he left. What happened later? Let's just say no one willl call me Mansex ever again. Or else!