My version of what Edward is going through.

This is short, I know, but I'm not sure of the reaction I will get from you, the readers(reviewers).

What did I do?

This is not my Bella anymore.

Her heart no longer beats, her cheeks no longer pink, her touch no longer warm.

It's as if I killed my sweet, fragile Bella. I did kill her. She is now technically dead. How could I do this to her. I am so repulsed by myself that I was ever that selfish. I took away Bella's future and stole her soul. How could I ever do such a thing?

I knew the answer already: Bella trusted me and wanted to be with me, like me, forever. She wanted me to be there when she woke up, to start our new life together. I cannot stay and face what I had turned her into. I'm too much of a monster to deserve someone who trusted me so completely and I went and completely destroyed her.

No one knows which way is up and which way is down when their entire world is shaken like a snow globe. Not to be here anymore would be the best. Not being able to escape this pain is unbearable. Vampires cannot die, without help. We can be destroyed where would god be now? Not here with me. I have no way of escaping.

I can see every detail of getting to this place. I got too involve with Bella, too interested. I fell hard for her and now I am repulsed by the creature I have created. I feel disgusted with myself to be feeling this way, but she isn't Bella anymore.

I cannot stay here.

I am extremely anxious and flinch at each scream that has pierced the air. The screams coming from my monster were scaring me more and more, the harshness of her voice and the accusations she threw at me were wild. But I still believed her very much. Alice was trying to convince me that she didn't mean it, that she was disoriented and in too much pain to know what she was saying.

Her body couldn't keep the morphine we gave her. It was rejected like her beating heart. The venom was closing in and taking over.

Soon, soon it will be over, my dear Bella. Soon. Please don't cry anymore, you're breaking my heart.

Carlisle kept looking at me and shooting me soothing thoughts and suggestions. Why did he have to care so much about me anyway. What's so great about me. I have killed many humans and have now claimed one more. This time I had intended to keep her.


Please let me know what you think. It would be great to get some feedback. Thanks. :)