Author Notes: Well, here you go, here's the ficlet I promised you. Now all those who start reading this and go, 'I know exactly how this is going to eend', just keep reading.

Dedication: To Seka-chan cos I fully can't write AkuRoku, so your fic is going to be awhile. Have this one instead.

Summary: Sora loves Riku so much thats it's tearing him up, he can't function, he can't even live properly. It seems like the only thing he can do is confess.

Suggested Listening : The Reason - Hobostank

Disclaimer: Quote:

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Me no own,
You no sue.


Sora lounged about in the corridor, frowning and pulling at the collar of his school shirt, he was desperate to get home and change into something cooler. Swimming trunks maybe? It was certainly hot enough. But he had to wait for Riku, some girl had practically kidnapped him and Sora was left waiting. Again. Even though experience told him he needn't worry, a tremor of fear ran through his small frame, turning him to ice. Maybe he didn't need to change after all.

The longer Riku stayed in that room with that girl, the closer Sora's breathing crept to hyperventilation. For an age, all he could hear was a soft murmuring of voices, but eventually, the door-handle clicked and Sora hastily re-arranged his face into a mask of cocky boredom. Riku emerged, shaking that silver hair out of his face.

"What was that all about?" asked Sora, faking ignorance. RIku rolled his eyes.

"Just another pointless confession." he sighed. Sora immediately felt lighter. Yet again. Riku had rejected a follower. The brunet had known he would, but there fear was always there. Always.

"Hello, earth to Sora?"

Sora looked up.

"Sorry, did I zone out?"

"Yeah, now c'mon. I want to get out of this uniform."

"Me too."


On the way to Sora's house, Riku stopped to get clothes, just a t-shirt and shorts. The two friends ended up lying in sun in Sora's backyard, not the best place to be when it was so hot, but out of their uniforms it wasn't so bad. For the billionth time, Sora wondered how Riku's skin could stay so beautifully pale and clear when he spent so much time in the sun.

"Something wrong?" asked Riku with a grin.

"N-no, why?"

"You're staring at me again."

"You're being paranoid." retorted Sora. Riku chuckled softly, unaware of the affect it had on his friend. He checked his watch

"Maybe. But I'm not being paranoid about the time, I gotta go."

He was gone in less than thirty seconds. Sora flopped back down onto the grass, squeezed his eyes shut and growled.

"Ri-ku!"


It was three o'clock in the morning and Sora was wide awake, thinking of Riku and hungry.

With a grumble, the brunet clambered out of bed and made his way down to the kitchen. He left the lights off and opened the fridge, shivering as the cold air hit him. Sora rifled through, pulling out the ingredients for a peanut-butter sandwich.

He pulled two slices of bread from the bag and placed them on the bench, lining them up perfectly. The knife dipped into the butter, spreading it evenly and exactly. The next to go on was the peanut-butter, then the two slices were put together and onto a plate. Ingredients were put back in the fridge and the bench was wiped down, all this done with utmost concentration. Sora knew that the second he let his focus slip it would all fall apart. He raised the sandwich to his mouth and sunk his teeth in. It tasted good at first and he swallowed, following it with another bite, but the blinds in the kitchen were open and a ray of silver moonlight reflected on the bench top. That was all it took.

Suddenly, the bread felt dry and stale, the butter tasted like the fridge and the peanut-butter was like glue, thickening in Sora's throat, making him gag. He knew the game was up, and ran to the bathroom. Trying to be as quiet as possible, Sora vomited up the bite he'd just taken, retching horribly. Afterwards, he just lay there, pressing his head to the cool tiles. Eventually, the taste in his mouth became too much. Grabbing his toothbrush, he brushed his teeth gingerly, trying not to set his gag reflex off again.

With an exasperated sigh, Sora stumbled back to his room and flopped back down onto the bed.

It was four o'clock in the morning and Sora was wide awake, thinking of Riku and hungry.


The next day dawned bright and early, too early. Sora knew it had dawned too early because he'd been awake, watching the sunrise. Cruelly, now that he was tired enough to finally fall asleep, it was time to get up. After dragged the stifling school uniform over his ever-shrinking form, Sora headed downstair and poured 750mL of energy drink down his throat before his stomach could protest. Luckily, he could deal with liquids.

"Are you going to eat anything?" asked Sora's mother, "Or just drink that rubbish?"

"It's better than drinking coffee." replied Sora, nodding at the cup in his mother's hands.

"I still want you to eat something." her voice was a little worried.

"No time. Gotta go. Bye!"


School.

Horrible uniforms, boring lessons, annoying teachers. Yet Sora loved it. Why? Because that was the one place he was guaranteed to find Riku.

You see, for some strange reason, Sora found it easier to function around Riku.

And then there was the fact that Sora loved the silver-haired boy to bits.


"Morning So'!"

"Morning 'Ku!"

"Sleep well?"

"Yeah." lied Sora with practised ease. The shadows under his eyes had been there too long for Riku to make anything of them. "How about you?"

"Pretty good."

The conversation spluttered and died, but RIku and Sora ignored it. Silence could be just as comfortable. They wandered in through the school gates, waving to friends and doing all those other day to day things.

"See ya at lunch Sora, oh wait, I've got a meeting, and one after school, sorry. See ya tomorrow then."

"Yeah, see ya 'Ku."

As soon as Riku was out of sight, Sora slammed his head into the nearest available surface (a tree). Today was going to be a long day.

Sora floated through the day, trying his absolute hardest to stay focused, it was a lost cause really, but Sora had never been one to give up. He could keep this up. He could, he could, he could. Not.

All through English, he kept spelling things R-I-K-U. Everything he did in maths added up to Riku. All the stuff he learned in Japanese translated Riku. In science, producers, consumers, carnivores, herbivores, omnivores, they all meant the same thing to Sora: Riku.


"Hurry up Sora, we'll be late for class!"

"Oh, what do we have next?"

"P.E."

Oh, god.


"Oi! Shut up!" yelled their P.E. teacher, Mr Braig. "We've got cross-country today, so save your energy."

Sora groaned. How the hell was he supposed to run the cross-country when he was as tired as he was? He was almost asleep already, dammit.

"Now hurry up and get changed!"

Sora scrambled into his P.E. uniform; navy shorts and a white top, hurrying, because being late in Mr Braig's class meant push-ups, and push-ups meant using up energy that Sora didn't have.

"Right you lot." Mr Braig ordered when the class was assembled in front of him. I've seen your records, and your all fairly fit, so anyone taking too long is just being lazy. Anyone who takes more than twenty-three minutes is going to have to run again."

Sora blanched. He could do the cross-country in about twenty minutes, on a good day.

"And if you take more then twenty-six minutes the second time, you'll have to run, again. Now line up!"

The class stood at the starting line, chatting away and complaining about the fact that they had to start on a hill. Mr Braig blew the whistle and everyone started running. Within minutes, Sora was well behind and out of breath.


"Keep running kid." commanded Mr Braig when Sora finally made it to the finish, wheezing heavily.

"You took thirty-two minutes, and if you're not back here in twenty-six minutes, you'll be running again, now go!"

Sora tried to ignore the hoots of laughter coming from his classmates as he set off once more. The chances of him meeting the deadline where almost non-existant, but maybe if he tried then Mr Braig would let him off. Yeah, and maybe Mr Even would let Axel set fire to his collection of frozen beetles legs.

By the second time Sora reached the finish line, Mr Braig was the only person waiting for him.

"Gees, I should brought a book." he grumbled. "You were forty minutes that time, how long are you gonna be now?"

Sora ignored him and kept on running.

When he returned for a third time, he found a note left on the ground, held down by a running stop watch. The time read 50:36, and counting. Sora pressed the button and looked at his teacher's hand-writing;

Sorry kid, but I got bored. Bring me the stopwatch tomorrow morning.

With twitching legs and a burning chest, Sora made his way back to the gym and pulled on his uniform. By now, he was so tired that he was close to tears. Wincing at every movement, Sora made his way through the deserted school grounds.

He was standing at the top of a set of stairs that marked the exit he used when Riku was busy, when his eyesight blurred, his head spun and the world toppled sideways, the last thing Sora thought was: Damn my luck, damn it to oblivion.


When Sora woke up, it was almost five o'clock. With a groan and a grumble, he picked himself up and winced at the the pain shooting up his side and arm. Nothing was broken, thankfully, but there were some pretty decent cuts and scrapes. Time to go and see Kairi.

Sora stumbled along, feeling ridiculously light-headed and getting lost twice. He reached Kairi's house and leaned his head against the doorbell.

"Okay! Okay! I'm coming!" Kairi's aggravated voice came from upstairs. A few seconds later, she opened the door with a grumble.

"I said I was comin-" She froze when she saw her friend. "Oh Sora, not again!"

"Sorry Kai." Sora said weakly. I couldn't sleep, and well..."

Kairi shook her head as she led Sora inside.

"Well, you not sleeping was pretty obvious, but what exactly did you do this time?"

"I passed out at the top of those steps at school." Sora sighed. I can add that to my collection. He thought as he followed Kairi into the bathroom and perched on the bench as she got out the first-aid kit. He'd already fallen off a set of monkey bars, onto a fence (don't ask), out of a tree, into a ditch, through a door, up a set of bleachers, and now he'd fallen down a set of steps.

"Still can't sleep 'cos of Riku?" asked Kairi, though she already knew the answer. Sora nodded.

"Where does it hurt?"

"My arm and side."

"Shirt off." ordered Kairi matter-of-factly. Sora complied, earning a gasp from the auburn-haired girl in front of him.

"Gods Sora, when was the last time you ate?" Breathed Kairi, running her fingers over the ribs protruding from Sora's chest.

"Um, I tried to eat a sandwich last night..."

"Tried?"

"I managed a bite, but then I thought of Riku and threw it back up again."

"When was the last time you ate something and managed to keep it down?"

"Tuesday morning, I had a piece of toast for breakfast."

"Sora! It's Thursday evening." Kairi began tending to his scrapes. "You can't carry on like this."

"I try to eat Kairi, really, I do! But every time I get something in my mouth, all I can think of is Riku, and it just comes straight back up again. What am I supposed to do?"

Kairi looked up at him with big, worried, indigo eyes.

"I think you need to tell him, Sora."

"What! No! No way!"

"Why not? This is tearing you up."

"And? I'd still think of him, and I'd still have trouble eating. Plus, what's it going to do?"

"Sora, have you ever stopped to consider that he might feel the same way? It wouldn't surprise me in the least, not the way he's been acting."

"Um, what?"

"I really think you should tell Riku. I mean, seriously, you two spend heaps of time together, and he's turned down all of those confessions, some from really nice girls. The only time either of you smile is when you're together, and well, I think he might like you too."

"You do?"

"Yes, Sora, I really do."


It was the next day, and Sora was as nervous as hell, if you'd given him the choice of jumping off a bridge with only a piece of sponge as a bungee cord, and telling Riku, he would've chosen the bridge. Sponge optional.

But Kairi was there, frog-marching him around so as he didn't run away.

"I don't want to Kairi!"

"Tough luck."

"Aw, but Kairi!" Sora prepared his face for puppy-dog eyes.

"Puppy-dog eye me and I death glare you Sora. Operative word being death."

He gulped.

"Calm down So'. This is no big deal."

"No big deal! This is the biggest deal of my life!"

"It'll be fine."

"No it wont!"

"So' you love him, you love him with every inch of your being. Have a little faith in yourself to be loved in the same way."

School was over, and they were waiting for Riku outside of an unlocked class room.

"I can't do this!"

"Yes you can, now shut up, he's coming."


Riku strode down the corridor, smiling at the sight of his friends. They looked tense though, and Sora looked thoroughly unhappy, Riku's smile slipped a little.

"You guys okay?"

"Um, yeah. Uh, Riku, could I talk to you for a minute? In private." Sora nodded towards the classroom.

"Sure..." Riku walked inside, Sora followed and closed the door, receiving an encouraging wink from Kairi.

"So, what's this all about?"

"I," Sora faltered, how could he explain all of this to Riku.

"Yes?"

The only way he could think to word it was soppy and stupid.

"Sora?" Riku was right in front of him, looking down worriedly.

"I, uh," Here goes everything. "Love you deeply, with every fibre of my being, I can't function without you, I need you in my life. You're everything I've ever wanted or needed. I love you so much that it's tearing me up inside. I love you more than anything Riku. You are my everything."

Riku leaned closer, his eyes widening, then narrowing as Sora spoke. He put one slender finger under the brunet's chin, tilting his face upwards. Sora's breath caught as Riku came even closer, staring him straight in the eye. Their mouths were millimetres apart, Riku parted his lips;

"Whatever Sora."

Riku tore his finger from Sora's skin, turning and walking out the door without a second glance. Sora's knees buckled and he fell to the floor. Tears welled up in his eyes. This wasn't the way things were supposed to go!

The sound of Riku's footsteps halted and Sora heard Kairi speak with fake innocence:

"What was that all about?"

"Just another pointless confession."