(Author's Note: Full Moon is meant to be a re-telling of the novel New Moon, by Stephenie Meyer. It is meant to be purely for fun and strictly non-canonical, so please take no offense when the story veers in an entirely different direction than the original.)

Chapter 1 -

The light was fading slowly. The numbness spread through me almost like serpent venom moves through veins; I could no longer move. The coldness gripped every part of me as the emptiness began to settle and the end drew nearer. In those last few seconds, memories began to flash past, wildly and without control. Memories of Renee, my harebrained mother; how I wished I could have said "goodbye." Memories of Charlie, my "Knight in Blue Armor," whom I had grown more close to during the summer than I ever thought possible before moving to Forks. Memories of my younger days. Yet, one image burned through my mind's eye as the sun through a looking-glass; irrevocably, powerfully...painfully. A pair of topaz colored eyes that tormented me beyond words. They would be the last thing I ever saw, I was sure of it. This was it for me. I could no longer draw breath and the light faded completely.
I died that night, the night Edward Cullen left.
Ironic, I thought to myself as I laid in a crumpled heap several hours later, awake at last.
A few days before I had been celebrating my birthday, not entirely happy to be getting older but at the very least I had Edward, and that kept me together. In fact, ever since coming to the sleepy town of Forks, Washington he was the only thing that kept me together through it all. Or maybe, just maybe, I was never whole to begin with until I met him. That must be have been it; I was incomplete without him and now that he had gone I shattered into ten-thousand pieces yet again. He was like gravity, keeping all the disjointed parts of me centered and together. Without him, the pieces began to drift away again.
Ironic, the word reverberated through my soul. A birthday and my death soon after.
The rain had begun to become heavier as it seeped through the forest canopy far above me and soaked me through and through. The light was completely gone now, the sun had set, and I could no longer see the green forest ground onto which I had collapsed after wondering through the forest aimlessly, living but not quite alive. Edward had left me, left me behind, here in this forest. He had brought me here to tell me that he could no longer be around me, that it was unsafe for him to stay, that he was, after all, a vampire...and I was temptation.
The incident at my birthday party shook him, I had known it, I had mentioned it to him but he pretended otherwise. I knew though, I knew. It shook him so thoroughly that he was no longer the same and I could tell. When you've been acclimatized to a perfect temperature, even the most subtle change will be noticeable. I had been acclimatized to him, to his presence, to his behavior.
It had been Alice, of all people, who had smelled my blood that fateful moment I injured myself. It had been that deep, untrammeled desire for my blood that had driven her within an inch of her sanity. It had been my blood that had driven her to the edge of despair before nearly attacking me. The look on her face as she ran towards me was not nearly as frightening as the expression she carried once it dawned on her what she had nearly done. Her onyx colored eyes, full of hunger and longing as she leapt just inches from me, could not compare to the tears that followed after her as she escaped the Cullen's home at lighting speed.
But I had forgiven her. I knew the consequences of spending my free time with a family of vampires. I knew that "accidents" were a possibility. Edward thought otherwise; the guilt ate away at him and he thought it best to walk away. That was it, wasn't it? That was always it. Every action he took was for "my own good," every moment he decided to ignore my wishes and my feelings...it was for "my own good." Fury began to replace the numbness in my body and the tears that streamed the down my face no longer mixed with the cold rain; they stung and burned as they passed through.
How could he? How could just leave me like this, like nothing I ever said had mattered, like what I wanted was unimportant? How could he think he could make decisions like this for me? Was my love so worthless to him that my opinions didn't matter?
Happy Birthday, Bella, I thought angrily.
I turned slowly onto my side, my elbow digging into the mud beneath me as I went and destroying the mosses and ferns that littered the forest ground. I couldn't see in this level of darkness, but my determination had become complete and total. I rolled on, until I finally found myself on my stomach, the mud now covering almost every inch of me, and making it harder for me to raise myself as I began to push with all the might I could muster. Seconds passed as I struggled to get to my feet, the darkness now pressing into my eyes almost as deeply as it pressed into my soul. The slippery mud made it that much more difficult as I kept losing my balance on it, and for a few moments I contemplated giving up completely.
You can't do this, I told myself. You're not strong enough.
Yet, something in me would not allow me to stop.
The tears continued, even as the rain became a light drizzle. For minutes on end I stumbled through the forest; my body was still unstable from the shock of losing Edward, my one true love. My legs would give out at any moment, I just knew it. Fumbling and tripping over impossible-to-see roots and rocks made it even more difficult. But I wouldn't give up, I couldn't. My whole life I had spent it hiding away, blending, being the "ordinary girl." But not now, not at this moment. I loved Edward too much, I was too angry at him, and I would not simply fade away like a decomposing rose.
My hands gripped tightly to the trunk of a great tree; an ancient, massive tree that was typical to the forests of Forks; it had been here were I had taken walks before, yet the lack of light would not allow me to escape it. To escape it to civilization, if you could even called Forks, Washington "civilization." I gripped the trunk of the tree harder than before as the realization hit me that I might not be able to make out of here.
I began to lose control of my legs completely and slowly slid down the tree's trunk, still refusing to let it go, and tears came down now in a way I never knew a human being could cry. I began to grow desperate and in my moments of agony I thought nothing could possibly save me.
The darkness, the eternal night was broken suddenly by a bright light only a few feet away from me, like the light at the end of a very long tunnel. At first I thought I had begun to hallucinate, but soon I began to hear voices; familiar voices. They were calling out my name.
"Bella?" Charlie was screaming from a short distance, though it felt infinitely far from where my soul currently was.
"Bella, honey, are you here?" Charlie continued on as his flashlight moved about the area near me, but not quite on me. Other lights joined him from all sides, little by little. It was a search party.
"Help," I mouthed, as all that left my lips was barely a whisper. I suppose Edward took that with him too: my words, my very breath.
"Bella?" a deep voice boomed through the silence of the forest. "Bella, if you can hear me, answer."
"Help," I tried once more, and this time it was louder. Not loud enough to be heard by those looking for me, but it was an improvement.
For a moment or two, my mind dwelled on the topaz colored eyes. For a moment or two, my mind dwelled on Edward Cullen's gaze and I knew I would never see him again. I screamed, I screamed louder than I ever had before. I screamed for help; not help to escape this foreboding forest, but help to escape from myself and my loss. The words came out perfectly and resonated like a bitter-sweet song of defeat.

---'--;

Brightness enclosed me for a few brief, confused moments as I tried to make sense of things. I was still cold and soaked; no more than a few minutes must have passed since I screamed in agony. The light surrounding me flickered as I slipped in out of consciousness. The voices continued near me, closer this time than ever before, but I could only understand fragments of it all.
"Is she going to be okay?" I heard Charlie's anxious voice from my near right.
"She will be," replied a second, unfamiliar voice from somewhere entirely out of sight. "She's just exhausted, Charlie. She needs time to mend."
"Where is Carlisle?" Charlie questioned once more, his voice a little more hopeful. "I want him to inspect her. I need to be absolutely sure she is okay; no offense Doctor Sheppard, it's just – "
"I understand," the other voice replied calmly. "Unfortunately, Carlisle did not show up to work his shift tonight and did not call in either. Frankly, I'm rather worried, in the years he has worked at the hospital he has never once..."
Everything become a jumble of sounds after that, as the pain in my chest began to swell and I began to drift off into sleep, into the one place I hoped I could escape him. Into the one place where I hoped I could escape myself entirely; I didn't want to be Isabella Swan right now. I didn't want to be the abandoned, unloved person I felt like at this very second. Quickly and surely I became lost to a world of uneasy dreams.

---'--;

I clenched at my chest as I awoke, breathing difficultly and with great heaviness. I felt as a person must feel when they are drowning in an ocean and at last breaks the surface of the waves above. Yet, exactly as a person feels if they are to arise in the middle of an empty ocean, I felt more lost than ever. The night had been a dreadful one, as they all had been for the past few weeks since Edward left me. The nights were too long, the dreams were too terrible, and I was too broken to fight them off.
Each night he haunted my dreams. Each night I was whisked away to the forest in front of Charlie's house, were I last stared into Edwards piercing eyes and his perfect face. Each night I was whisked away to the utterly green scene around me, and he stood there a distance away, waiting for me with a smile. His body shone underneath the sunlight and he beckoned me toward him. I ran, as quickly as I could, sometimes even flew. But the dreams always ended the same: Edward would stop smiling, then would vanish before I could so much as touch his cold, marble-like skin. The sunlight went away with him and I was left in the pouring rain, with my thoughts and nothing more.
I awoke on this particular morning crying as I usually did. That was routine for me now. I cried myself to sleep every night, trying to assure myself that my love wasn't worthless. I cried in my dreams. Then cried some more when I could no longer sleep. It was good that I had the time down, at least. I cried only during the night time, in private, away from Charlie.
Poor Charlie, he had been dealing with my situation valiantly. Sometimes he became frustrated, I could see it in his face; I refused to go out, to eat properly, to do anything that interested me. Still, I didn't cry in his presence. I thought I owed him at least that small level of comfort. His frustrations were nothing compared to his care, though. He was with me through even the hardest moments. He was there for me when I heard the news that the Cullens truly had left Forks and were never coming back.
"Carlisle got a fantastic job offer," Doctor Sheppard had mentioned to Charlie over the phone, while I sat there listening in on the other line. "He couldn't refuse it. I'm not surprised though, I suspect a doctor of his caliber would have offers pouring in for his employment all over the country."
"Yeah," Charlie answered back weakly, "yeah, I figured as much."
What had angered Charlie the most was that, despite how difficult it was for him to show emotion, he proved himself keenly observant of situations involving other people's feelings. He knew that Edward leaving was had killed my soul and this caused Charlie fury at the mention of his name. He did not mention it to me explicitly, but the comprehension passed between us in those few moments he had asked me to watch television with him. He was trying very hard to distract me.
Then again, I imagine that my change might have been more obvious than I originally thought. It wasn't just that I was emotionally gone, but even physically it was noticeable. As I looked into the bathroom mirror early in the morning, I discovered that I looked different. My face seemed almost a perfect reflection of how I felt; hollow. My white, almost translucent skin had become chalky and my eyes lacked any level of sparkle. Even my hair was a mess more than usual, though at least it remained its typical brown, never quite losing its waves.
I brushed my teeth quickly after taking a shower, then dressed in a pair of comfortable jeans and a very simple white shirt. Today was my first day back to school after missing the entire first week, and I wanted badly to avoid any level of attention being drawn to me. It was no secret to anyone anymore why I had missed a full five days of the starting term.
"She's visiting Renee in Florida," Charlie told his close friends. Yet, the rumor that I was too depressed to make it to school didn't stop from spreading quickly through the town. Small towns like this always had rumors, plenty of them. I suppose when you have very little to entertain yourself with, gossip is a fine replacement.
After tying my hair into a simple ponytail, I put on my sneakers, picked up my bag full of books, and then made my way downstairs to the kitchen. When I entered, my breakfast was already waiting for me at the small kitchen table where I usually sat down to eat all my meals. It was a plate of fried eggs and a bagel, all of which would have probably looked appetizing to anyone capable of feeling hungry. I barely felt like eating since that fateful night.
Still, I sat and ate as quickly as possible. Charlie really had gone out of his way to create a magnificent meal for me. He had taken to this behavior since the incident; I could scarcely hold myself together, much less hold a frying pan. Charlie had taken it upon himself to try and cook me meals. His first attempts were absolute failures; we no longer had a microwave after he set it on fire by accident. Yet, through the weeks he had shown great improvement. His cooking was almost getting as good as mine, but even if it had never been better than burnt toast, the effort was appreciated in what little space I had left in my heart to appreciate anything in life.
"Hey dad," I said as he entered the kitchen. I couldn't call him "Charlie" to his face. My dad was the type of person who always believed that everything had a proper name. To his friends he was "Charlie," to his colleagues he was "Officer Swan," and to his daughter, me, he was "dad." This was never up for debate, but considering how easy Charlie was to live with, I did not complain. It was a small sacrifice I could easily make.
I smiled at him as best as I could muster. No good, he knew better.
"Morning Bells," he said, then while pointing his nose towards my plate, asked: "do you like it?"
"It's fantastic dad," I replied. It wasn't a lie.
We sat in silence for a while, as Charlie looked down into his own plate of food and fiddled from time to time with the badge on his blue jacked. He was ready for work, although with how quiet things were in this place, I wondered if ever had any real work to begin with. Then again, he wasn't aware that until very recently a coven of vampires was living within the confines of his jurisdiction.
"Are you ready?" he asked me after several minutes, not raising his gaze from the bacon he was currently shifting absentmindedly with his knife.
Once more understanding passed between us so as for there not to be need for any words. Was I ready to return to Forks High School and walk the halls where Edward and I had often held hands? Was I ready to sit in the same cafeteria where I had first met him? Was I ready to deal with the memory of him hunting me every second that passed and every turn I made? Well, no, I wasn't. But his memory would have haunted me even if I had been in the Sahara all by myself.
"As ready as I'll ever be," I replied as I finished up, rose, and quickly washed my plate. I threw my bag hastily over my shoulder and pulled my keys off the hook by the door. My hand was on the door handle when Charlie called me back into the kitchen.
"Bells," he said as he fidgeted with his hands, clearly uncomfortable with what he was about tell me. "Listen, Bells, honey...I'm proud of you. You're very strong. Don't ever forget that."
Then he walked a few steps and gave me an awkward hug, which somehow still managed to feel rather nice. I hugged him back.
"Thanks dad," I said, truly smiling for the first time in a long time, then made my way out of the door.
I revved the engine of my ancient red truck, then began to make the drive to school. The sky was clear, clear enough where Edward and his family would have to have taken a "camping trip," as they called it. Yet, the windshield was blurry. I found myself crying again, without control.
You're very strong. Don't ever forget that.
Charlie's words entered my mind as I mopped my eyes on a Kleenex from a packet I kept in my car. I had worn no makeup and I was glad I had forgone the idea, because at least now I didn't have mascara just running all over my face.
When I arrived at school, many heads in the student parking lot turned my way. Most vehicles in Forks were old and used, but mine stood out like no other. Not the least because it was loud enough to be heard from a mile away or more.
I found a decent spot to park in and cut the engine. I began to breathe heavily and grip the steering wheel until my knuckles turned white. I was in full flight of panic, I couldn't deny it. For a few moments I thought of turning my truck back on simply driving off. Where to, I had no idea, but it was tempting nonetheless.
It was only when someone knocked on my window that I decided to step out. Almost as instantly as I planted both feet firmly on the parking lot pavement, I was in a great embrace.
"Bella! You're back!"
It was Angela Weber, another girl in my year, one who I was very fond of. She had been the only one who had treated me like a human being during last year's fiasco of a school transfer. To everyone else I was a commodity, a shinny new object to be gawked at. It wasn't that I was particularly beautiful, but simply that I was new and different. That was enough to garner me more attention than I ever wanted or needed. Needless to say, my first year at Forks High School was not quite as quiet as I expected it to be.
Ha! I thought to myself. "Not quite as quiet" is an understatement.
"You thought I wouldn't come back?" I asked Angela, who smiled in return.
"Well, sort of," she answered honestly, all the while rearranging her glasses and pointing her soft brown eyes to the ground. "I just thought that if you went to Florida to see your mom, you might stay there."
"Why would I?" I continued to question as the two of us began to walk to class together; I had been lucky enough to be given a few subjects with her.
"Because Florida can't possibly be as boring as Forks," Angela replied, then giggled softly.
"You'd be surprised," I commented, though deep down there was something more than excitement which kept me tethered to this town. It was the only place where a memory of him still remained. Once in a while, I told Charlie I needed to go to the beach down in La Push, although all I really ever did was visit the Cullen's abandoned home. The house and I shared the same emptiness.

---'--;

My day went mostly without event, despite my original fear, although memories haunted me more than ever. Unknown to me was the fact that Forks High had seen a new transfer student, one all the way from New York City. Everyone payed me attention only briefly; the student body had a new obsession to keep them entertained and I was glad of it. According to rumor, not only was this new girl interesting because of where she came from, but e was also abruptly good looking. I figured this to be true, as no matter how many people I passed while going from class to class, not one single male student failed to mention how gorgeous the new transfer was.
I had not seen her quite yet, as I had no classes with her. I was quite unprepared for our encounter during lunch hour. I sat at a table, all on my own; Angela had chosen to sit with Ben Cheney, another student a year ahead of ours whom Angela was not so secretly crushing on. I was glad to sit alone, it gave me time to be miserable by myself and not draw anyone else down with me.
"Hi, I'm Marylin," I heard a soft, velvety voice call to me, interrupting my endless mulling.
I looked up only to find myself utterly stunned. It was no lie that this new student truly was was beautiful; beautiful enough to make me feel simple, though that was not often hard to do. She was the kind of girl that would be picked out of a crowd by a modeling agent in any big city. What was worse was that, as I first laid eyes on her, I felt immense fury. Her nearly perfect features reminded me of Edward, Alice, and even Rosalie. Her golden hair was cut in a very stylish way, her dress was clearly brand name, and she looked like she did not belong in Forks anymore than I belonged in the cover of a fashion magazine.
"Can I sit here?" she prodded while wearing a wide and charming smile. Her green eyes lingered on me for a few minutes before I could muster a reply.
No, I thought as rage filed me.
"Yes," I lied out loud.