A/N: I don't usually do this. Hell, I don't even read most high school Naruto fics. But then...I had an idea and decided to explore it. And so came up with this. Stupid, I know, but eh, what the hell. It's kinda similar to my horribly crowded school email :p
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. It belongs to Masashi Kishimato.
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: OMG!
You will not believe this! But seriously, it happened!
Well, in Geography (which YOU skipped! Cow) Kiba sneaked Akamaru into class. And then Shino was walking past him, and he stumbled, and his glass jar with the bugs, that horrible one? Well, it broke and all the bugs went over Akamaru, and boy was Kiba furious. So, Shino tried to get all the bugs off Akamaru, but apparently he missed some. So he took his glasses off to look for them.
Oh, yes. Shino Aburame without his glasses!
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: Shino's eyes.
Not that this topic would usually interest me, but I'm bored as hell at the moment.
What colour were his eyes?
LOL. Mutt boy just walked past and he looks pissed.
Note to self: Annoy him later.
-Ino
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: His eyes
They were a deep green. With bits of brown, you know? Nice.
What are you going to do with that? Analyse the silent Aburame with it?
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: My analysis of you is…
That you like the bug boy. ^.^ Am I correct or am I correct?
Now, I wasn't actually going to analyse him, so in your face. But, really, I didn't expect him to have any other colour.
Blue with Shino? No.
Black with Shino? No. The only people that get away with having black hair and black eyes are gorgeous Sasuke-kun and Shikamaru.
Speaking of the latter, is he asleep again? I can't see him from here.
-Ino
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Shut up
I do not have a crush on Shino, stupid Ino-pig.
Nah, he's not sleeping. He's watching clouds.
Figures.
Why do you even like him anyway?
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: Shikamaru
Meh, he's a pretty nice guy when he's not playing dead.
And, speaking about playing dead, Kiba's just walked past.
Later, Forehead.
-Ino
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Kiba Inuzuka
Subject: Bugs
Well, did it happen with Shino's bugs?
-Ino
PS. That sounded so wrong.
From: Kiba Inuzuka
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Yes. But.
How the hell do you know about that? You weren't even there to see it!
-Kiba
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Kiba Inuzuka
Subject: Heh
Gossip gets around, Kiba, it gets around.
Seriously, I expect somebody else to be late on picking the grapes.
-Ino
From: Kiba Inuzuka
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Grapes
What do they have to do with anything?
-Kiba
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Kiba Inuzuka
Subject: You
Are seriously stupid. Your dog has a higher IQ than you.
-Ino
From: Kiba Inuzuka
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Akamaru
I wouldn't be surprised. He's seriously too smart for a dog.
-Kiba
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Kiba Inuzuka
Subject: You. Again.
Are an idiot. That was NOT a compliment. Get it into your head.
Stupid mongrel.
-Ino
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Shino Aburame
Subject: Eyes in general
And yours in particular. I feel privileged to have seen them.
Are you planning on taking off your glasses anytime soon? And if so, when?
-Sakura
From: Shino Aburame
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: My answer.
No. And even if I was planning to, which I am not, I would never tell you.
And I believe that you should be working, like others in this class. I am included in this.
-Shino
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Hit list.
1. Shino
2. Shino
3. Shino
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: Lol
He's looking you way :p
-Ino
From Sakura Haruno
To: Kankuro
Subject: Shino
Is he working? Or is he not?
-Sakura
From: Kankuro
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: Re: Shino
He appears to be. But he's just closed off a browser about…
Bugs.
The freak.
-Kankuro
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Kankuro
Subject: Thanks
Seriously
-Sakura
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Shino Aburame
Subject: You lied!
I have it from a very good source that you, my friend, LIED.
You were researching insects, and not working.
Hypocrite.
-Sakura
From: Shino Aburame
To: Sakura Haruno
Subject: So I did.
Frankly, I don't care. You bore me, and I find Akamaru more interesting than you.
To put it clichéd: Whatever, major loser. Billboard brow.
-Shino
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Assassins and hit men
Know where I can find any? Shino is so going to die.
Do. Not. Ask. Why.
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Shino Aburame
Subject: Congratulations!
You are on Sakura's hit list. Well done.
What did you do? Spill!
-Ino
From: Shino Aburame
To: Ino Yamanaka
Subject: Hitlist?
I congratulate myself.
I can now die happy.
I called her billboard brow to stop her from emailing me.
Now, please do the same.
-Shino
From: Ino Yamanaka
To: Shino Aburame
Subject: You
I freakin' love you, bug boy.
And I never knew you had a sense of humour :p
And I will now leave you.
-Ino
From: Kankuro
To: Shino Aburame
Subject: So…
What did the girls want?
-Kankuro
From: Shino Aburame
To: Kankuro
Subject: The source…
Must be you.
Nothing much. Now stop emailing me.
-Shino
From: Tsunade
To: Jiraiya
Subject: Your classes
Jiraiya, I have come to the conclusion that none of your class is working. They are supposed to be catching up on work that might have been missed, finish homework and research. However, they do not. You and Kakashi are not doing your job. Kindly see to it, or there'll be hell to pay.
-Tsunade
From: Jiraiya
To: Kakashi
Subject: Damn
I think Tsunade's onto us. What should we do?
-Jiraiya
From: Kakashi Hatake
To: Jiraiya
Subject: Re: Damn
No, it's probably just a fluke. I'd like to get back to reading, if you don't mind. (*)
-Kakashi
From: Jiraiya
To: Kakashi Hatake
Subject: Correct
I suppose you are.
Keep reading. I wrote a massive twist with another girl near the end.
-Jiraiya
From: Kakashi Hatake
To: Jiraiya
Subject: Idiot
You've spoiled it for me now. I'll keep reading anyway.
-Kakashi
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Hinata Hyuuga
Subject: Shino
Heya! I was just wondering whether you had seen his eyes before Geography?
Love
-Sakura
Ten Minutes Later
From: Sakura Haruno
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Hinata
What the hell is she doing? She hasn't responded to my email.
-Sakura
From: Ino Yamanka
To: Neji Hyuuga
Subject: Your cousin
What's wrong with Hinata? She hasn't replied to an email for AGES.
-Ino
From: Neji Hyuuga
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Hinata
She's fainted. Naruto's telling…very vulgar jokes.
-Tenten (On Neji's computer. He's taken a toilet break :p)
From: Ino Yamanka
To: Neji Hyuuga
Subject: Neji
While he's still gone, what is wrong with him? He's so cold and stiff, and he seems to have thousands of wooden poles stuffed up his ass. What's wrong with him, eh?
-Ino
From: Tenten
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Your gravestone
Would you like a marble one? Because Neji just came back and read it. And he doesn't look happy. Sorry DX
-Tenten
From: Neji Hyuuga
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Your previous email.
I have yet to understand what possessed you to send that aforementioned email to me of all people, but no matter.
You wil pay.
I hear that Shikamaru can hack into computers. I shall be asking him a favour soon.
-Neji
From: Neji Hyuuga
To: Shikamaru Nara
Subject: A favour.
I was wondering if you could do me a favour. I would appreciate it if you gave me Ino's password to her email account.
-Neji
From: Shikamaru Nara
To: Neji Hyuuga
Subject: Re: A favour
No.
-Shikamaru
From: Neji Hyuuga
To: Shikamaru Nara
Subject: Why not?
Well?
-Neji
From: Shikamaru Nara
To: Neji Hyuuga
Subject: Re: Why not?
Firstly, it's troublesome.
Secondly, Ino's threatened to tell my mother a lot of incriminating stuff about me.
Thirdly, I like living.
So, there.
-Shikamaru
From: Neji Hyuuga
To: Shikamaru Nara
Subject: Nara
Screw you
-Neji
From: Shikamaru Nara
To: Neji Hyuuga
Subject: Re: Nara
Too troublesome
-Shikamaru
From: Ino Yamanka
To: Shikamaru Nara
Subject: You
I love you so much. In fact, I'm seriously considering coming over and snogging you to death :)
-Ino
From: Shikamaru Nara
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Re: You
Well, please don't. Your father will arrange a marriage before the day is out.
-Shikamaru
From: Ino Yamanka
To: Shikamaru Nara
Subject: Well
I suppose you're right. Ah, well. You know I love you anyway.
Lessons almost over! Phys. Ed next. You happy?
-Ino
From: Shikamaru Nara
To: Ino Yamanka
Subject: Tch.
Yeah, right. It's a drag. Plus, we keep getting supplies ever since Asuma was ill
-Shikamaru
From: Tsunade
To: Konoha_School_All
Subject: Physical Education
As Mr. Asuma Sarutobi is currently ill, the supply teacher will be Guy Maito. He will teach until further notice.
-Tsunade. Headmistress.
From: Ino Yamanka
To: Class_15_A
Subject: PE
Who else is up for skipping?
-Ino
Later, Guy Maito wondered why there was only Lee in his class.
PE: I live in England, so I don't know if you use this word in other countries? 'Tis short for Physical Education :)
A/N: God, I have no idea what possesed me to do that. But frankly, to hell with it.
Review?
