I was falling. It was all dark. There was no light. There was no sound, other than the wind ripping through my tangled hair and torn clothing; chilling air all over my body. I could not see but I could feel. I was shivering, a slight, buzzy tingle every once in a while, traveling from my head, crawling down my spine, working its way to my legs, to the tip of my toes and back. My limbs danced helplessly with the rushing wind, like a ragdoll. I was slowly regaining consciousness; consciousness that was brought back by fear and realization of what would happen at any moment.

I gained consciousness only so that I could feel every ounce of pain that would strike me when I collide with the ground. I would wake up just for the pain. The pain…

…It brought back the memories, bittersweet illusions. Illusions making me feel as if time rewound itself to a place in life where everything was simple and sweet. Where I was not falling to a cold floor but into the arms of the one I loved instead. A place where I was carrying a school bag filled with books instead of bloody weapons used to slay the people that used to be my friends; a place where my body was covered in childish just-add-water tattoos instead of the dried blood, caked-on dirt and wounds that I am afraid might permanently scar me.

A place I used to call home.

Home was long-gone; it was out of the question. There was no turning back to that place now. I couldn't go back; I can't even want to go back. I would be cruel if I showed my face in the place I called home, and the reason is because of my own doing.

That place of warmth and love, childhood and family, happiness and all…

…was the place I destroyed.

At this time, while I fall to my fate, I shall recall every detail of my life, every crevasse and crack of my brain I will explore, I will find out where it all went wrong.

I will find where I went wrong. I will see where the errors were made, and I will look back to all the various ways that it could have been corrected. I will fix it all. As pointless as it is, I will.

The darkness remained, no slivers of hope in the form of light, no way of seeing, no way of knowing where the sky and the ground meet. That means the floor would defeat me with the element of surprise. Not that I could do anything to save myself in this situation anyway, I guess it helps that I cannot see my fate coming.

Hot tears clouded my vision, but they don't dare to stain my cheeks. Simply put, I don't feel sad. I was at peace, left with the calm floating feeling, giving me a lot to think about. I weary smile cursed my face, as if my brain was letting me know that I was no longer in control of my body or my movement. I did not feel like smiling, but I wasn't sad. My mind had used that against me by making me smile and making me cry as well. It seems that I've lost everything now, even myself.

I couldn't help but lose control of the breath I'd been holding back for a while. It slowly escaped my lungs in the form of a soft sigh. It was a sign. I had a long trip down memory lane, and this lane stretched as far as the eye can see.

Let the journey begin…