Dear Mees-ter Fan-toom Sir Person,
I emm verreh engreh ett you for gettin' mah precious Fluffeh-Puff dirteh with spaghetteh sauce! Why, you maht essk? Becahz she costed 5 hund-a-rred doll-ah! As uff March Eck-teenth, Eck-teen-seffenty-one, you are-a bein'-a sued for bein' a dirteh slob! If you do notta write-a back with in 24 hourr-as, you will-a be facin' an angry (said with a roll of the tounge) prrrrima donna!
I emm verreh engreh ett you for gettin' mah precious Fluffeh-Puff dirteh with spaghetteh sauce! Why, you maht essk? Becahz she costed 5 hund-a-rred doll-ah! As uff March Eck-teenth, Eck-teen-seffenty-one, you are-a bein'-a sued for bein' a dirteh slob! If you do notta write-a back with in 24 hourr-as, you will-a be facin' an angry (said with a roll of the tounge) prrrrima donna!
Sincerrleh,
La Carlotta Giudicelli, Prrrrima Donna of the Opera Populaire
