Hey everyone well here it is a new story. I don't have a name for it yet after you read it and you have a name message me please and if the description doesn't work please let me know what you guys think. Hope you like it.

I still can't believe he's gone my whole life my world it's gone.

It's been 1 week since the funeral and I still feel so numb not having him here with me.

I was sitting in the cemetery looking at the grave stone it just seems so unreal.

John Thomas Holmes
Born July 31st 1979
Died April 6th 2012
Loving Son, Husband and Brother.

"What am I going to do with you John. I can't go back to that empty house alone."

I didn't think I had anymore tears left to cry but I did. All I could do was cry.

John Holmes was not only my husband he was my best friends we met in high school I guess you could say he was my high school sweetheart and my college sweetheart. We were never apart and when we were it wasn't for very long.

5 years ago John was diagnosed with lung cancer. When the doctors found it he was in stage 1. He went through ever treatment they had and after 3 years his cancer was in complete remission and things were finally starting to get back to normal.

No more medication, No more treatment, John and I were finally going to be able to start living normal lives. We even started talking about starting our family.

It was until that fall day 3 months ago. I was at work when I got a phone call from my mother in law.

Flashback 3 months ago January 4th 2012.

"Hey lisa how was your holiday."

"Oh hey lacey. It was great oh look what john bought me for Christmas." I said holding up my left wrist to show her my brand new diamond tennis bracelet.

"Oh my goodness that is gorgeous. I guess it pays to be married to a very popular defense attorney." She said.

I just smiled and went to my desk. It was a quite morning not much going on at Gold Realtors so I decided to catch up on some paper work left over from being gone for the holidays. Just as I was starting my paper work the phone rang.

"Gold Realtors. Lisa Holmes speaking."

"Lisa honey you need to get to the hospital."

"Alice what's wrong."

"It's john honey he collapsed at work this morning they are rushing him to the hospital."

"Alright I'm on my way."

I hung up and ran out of the office as fast as I could.

I must have broken a couple speed limits, thankfully there weren't to many cops around.

When I got to the hospital the first thing I did was go to the nurses station.

"Can I help you."

"My husband was rushed her this morning. John Holmes."

"John Holmes here we are take the elevator up to the 5th floor and make a right at the front desk. I'll call up and tell them your on your way."

"Thank you."

I grabbed the visitors pass from the nurse and headed for the elevator.

When I got to the 5th floor and ran to where alice was.

"Alice."

"Sweetheart his cancer is back."

"No they said he was in remission."

"He was but they ran some test and it's back and it's spreading."

"Oh my god."

"Honey go be with him."

I walked into john's room and over to his bed.
He looked so pale. I took his hand and held it close to my heart.

"Hi baby." He said with a weak voice.

"Hi."

He took his hand and caressed my cheek he wiped away a tear.

"It's back isn't it."

I couldn't even speak all I could do was nod my head.

"Oh baby don't cry I'm sure I'll beat this just like I did the last time."

I couldn't help but cry. I wanted to believe he could beat it but I was just so scared.

As the days went by john got weaker and weaker his chemo stopped working, he was losing weight rapidly and his gorgeous wavy brown hair was falling out. I stayed by his side every minute of everyday.

I would help him in and out of bed, I would feed him and bathe him and make him as comfortable as I could.

Then it happened.

It was a warm spring day but the weather changed drastically.

John was so weak it was hard for him to speak.

"Lisa." He said in weak voice.

"Shhh baby don't speak save your strength."

"Lisa always remember I. I love you."

"I love you to baby." I said holding his hand.

Suddenly his hand went limp.

"John. John."

"He's gone honey."

"No Liz he can't be gone. No."

Liz is my best friend and she was there with me through everything.

The day john died was the day my life changed forever.

End flashback.

"Lisa honey come on it's chilly out here."

I looked up and saw Liz standing there. She helped me up and took me home.

When I got home I went up to the bedroom that I once shared with john and I saw one of his favorite shirts hanging on the back of the bedroom door I stripped out of my clothes and put on the shirt and breathed in and it still smelled like john. It felt like he was right there with me.

I would lay back in bed and remember the nights we made love, the night we would just lay in bed and listen to music or watch a movie. When I looked at the clock on the night table I saw what time it was it was 8pm and I smiled 8pm on Monday was the time john always loved wwe raw was his fav thing to watch.

I turned on the tv and got comfortable I closed my eyes and I could hear john talking to the tv like he always did. I slowly found myself enjoying wrestling but I knew it wouldn't be the same with john there.

I lost the love of my life and I don't know if I'll ever recover from this.