Cast of Characters:
Gray Fullbuster, an 18-year-old male (student), the Idiot
Lucy Heartfilia, a 17-year-old female (student), the Indifferent "Wolf"
Mirajane Strauss, a 26-year-old female (teacher), the Devil Matchmaker
Scene: Gray and Lucy are Fairy Tail High's top two students. These two have been fighting for the position of top student at this academy (or at least Gray is), and are practically sworn enemies (according to Gray). Gray and Lucy recently had a test in their AP physics class, which they have together. The tests are about to be passed back by their teacher, Ms. Strauss.
Strauss: (bored) Alright, come up and get your test papers when I call your name. If you have a problem with your score or would like to talk about your current grade, come see me after class.
(Strauss announces names and students go up to Strauss's personal podium to get their papers.)
Strauss: Gray.
(Gray noisily and abruptly stands and retrieves his paper, returning to his desk without looking at his score and places the paper facedown. He glares at Lucy, who just so happens to sit next to him. She ignores him, maintaining her focus.)
Strauss: Lucy.
(Lucy retrieves her paper and takes her seat, placing her paper facedown. Heads turn as Gray slams his facedown paper on her desk, a taunting look on his face.)
Gray: (haughtily) Lemme see your paper. I'll do you a favor and let you see mine, too.
Lucy: (exasperated) You know, you're being really annoying. Doesn't this ever get old for you? You're the only one who cares about winning this and that between us. Can't you just be satisfied with having good grades?
Gray: How cold, Lucy. Aren't we friends?
Lucy: Who was it exactly that said we were sworn enemies, again?
Gray: Come on now, don't be like that.
Lucy: (to the audience) Yup, he's annoying. And an idiot.
Lucy: Fine. Just remember, I don't care either way. If you want to say you won, then fine, you win. If I end up with the better grade, please shut up and accept it. I don't want to hear or see you freaking out and accusing me of cheating. Don't make a big deal if you don't like how this turns out. Act like a man. Got it, Gray?
Gray: Jeez, Lucy. Chill, I ain't gonna be like that.
Lucy: Sure you aren't. 'Kay, on the count of three, we'll flip over our papers. Got it?
Gray: Anytime, Lucy. I'm growin' old here.
Lucy: Watch your mouth, idiot. 'Kay, 1...2...3!
(The two students flip their papers over. Silence descends upon the room. The other students have long lost interest, due to having such situations occur when it came to those two.)
Gray: …
Lucy: …
Gray: What the - a tie! To hell with this! It's gotta be either you or me! Strauss! You've graded us incorrectly!
Strauss: It's Ms. Strauss to you, mister. And mind your manners. Like I stated beforehand, if you have a problem with your score, come see me after class.
Gray: What?! I don't need to! We all already know who's gonna be the winner!
Strauss: Manners, mister! If that's what you think, then it's your loss, Gray.
Gray: Wha-?!
Lucy: *sighs and scoffs* I thought you said you weren't going to freak out, idiot. And if the winner's already been decided from the start, then what was the whole point of us doing this? What a waste of time, you unmanly idiot.
(Gray turns red with anger and starts shaking.)
Gray: YOU LITTLE-!
(The bell sounds. Strauss and the other students, including Lucy, exit the classroom for their lunch break, leaving a trembling Gray behind alone in the classroom. He remains in front of Lucy's desk, gripping its edges hard enough for cracks to start appearing.)
Gray: I can't believe this. I'm obviously much smarter and much more athletic than that Lucy, so why did we get the same score?! And that Lucy; she's even got the nerve to act all high and mighty! Just you wait - I'll beat you next time! I won't forget this! Just you wait!
(Strauss, standing outside the classroom, sighs in exasperation.)
Strauss: (quietly, to herself) That idiot.
~ Fin ~
Alternate Ending Bonus (AEB)
AEB #1
Strauss: (quietly, to herself) That idiot. Doesn't he realize he's gonna have to pay for that desk?
AEB #2
Strauss: ("quietly", to herself) That idiot.
Gray: I heard that, Strauss!
AEB #3
Strauss: (quietly, to herself) That idiot. Isn't he obsessed enough with Lucy to know that he might be in love? Looks like I've got some work to do. I wasn't known as the Devil Matchmaker back in the day for nothing! - (A/N: Says the one who's still single -.-)
Side Note: They're all idiots. Hence the title. -.-
