The Moment I Saw You Cry

Disclaimers: No, I don't own Card Captor Sakura. Do you know how much I wish I own it? This is serving fan purposes only =_=
And I don't own that line from that song Cry. I really wish I did, too.

Author's Notes: No, I didn't see A Walk to Remember. I really really want to though ;_; I really, *really* want to ._. uhm..
yeah, I've been out for QUITE SOME TIME. @_@;; I haven't written a fic for so long. So don't expect this to be that great.
It's going to forget to turn and run off a cliff o_O;;;; bu yeah. I can always attempt, can't I? ^_^;;; but.... I'm back! And
that's what matters... for now... I guess... *sigh*

Oh yeah. A warning. This is NOT your everday cute fluffy Sakura and Syaoran fic. Don't get me wrong; I love Sakura and
Syaoran fluffiness. I guess it just got to me so much that I needed to write a second fic that's a little... well...
different... (and when I say different, I mean... dark, angsty, etc)... You have been warned.

Oh yes, one more thing. This is going along the comic book storyline, NOT the anime. In other words, Meiling and Sakura have
NEVER met.

After 5 years of no contact, Syaoran came back to Tomoeda. Sakura felt that nothing can seperate them anymore... except for
two secrets that each had of their own.

*****************

It was another normal school day at Tomoeda High School. Students were lounging about the hallways, studying for tests or
just gossiping about everyday school things. After all the events concerning the Clow Cards, there weren't any other
disturbances, and life resumed its daily routine. But for Sakura, she found it as another day for her to suffer.

The man she fell in love with had gone away, and she never heard from him since then. At times, she would begin to doubt
her feelings for him, because he never wrote. He knew her adress. He knew her phone number. She wrote to him once; she knew
where he lived. But he never wrote back. Sakura would start to feel angry, and her mind would throw a small tantrum. She
would shut her bedroom door and would refuse to come out. And once she was concealed inside, she would start to shed tears of
regret, for hating him.

She felt as if her life was crashing. Nothing seemed to go right anymore. She started failing math, and her grades started
to decline in most of her subjects. She used to get A's in Japanese. It went down to a low B. As for music, she was barely
passing.

She still enjoyed Gym; she was the fastest runner at school. She even won second place in track and field out of every
other student in Japan. If she hadn't tripped slightly during the 500 metre dash, she could have won. So, instead of focusing
on her subjects, she thought maybe it would be best if she stayed focused on physical education.

When her grades started to fall, Sakura asked quite a few people for help. Half, she asked for tutoring. The other half,
for emotional comfort. But it still didn't help. There was still something missing, and Sakura desperately wanted to fill in
that empty spot. With Syaoran.

"All right. Would everyone turn their books to page 304 please?"

Sakura groaned. Not only was it math, they were starting logarithms today. She begged for the teacher to drawl on for the
rest of the class, so that she didn't have to pay attention. But at least, she wasn't the only one. Her whole class was the
worst when it came to math. Before she laid her head down on her desk, she heard a couple of sighs, and a groan from the
other side. The teacher started writing on the board for a few minutes, explaining every step she had come across.

"...and this law will be able to help you solve..."

There was a small knock on the door. A short, cute, polite knock. The teacher paused to think, finished what she was
writing and turned to the door. Her skirt swept the floor as she swiftly approached. The teacher peered out the window, then
smiled. She turned the knob willingly, pushed the door open lightly, and returned to the middle of the class.

"Because of the many failing grades in this class, I asked another teacher to send one of his students for an assisstant.
However, he didn't have any students that didn't require further work."

More groans were heard, while the teacher smiled reassuringly. The last thing they really needed was someone they knew, at
their age, to nitpick on their mathwork.

"However, I was told that this student just transferred to the school yesterday afternoon. His math records are astounding.
I was also told that he lived here in Tomoeda before, so I hope everyone who did live here would welcome him, whether he be
an old or new aquaintance or friend."

The teacher bowed and motioned for the student to come in. Sakura perked up her head in interest, and Naoko was right
behind her, whispering harshly about Takeshi.

A couple of years ago, Takeshi had moved out of Tomoeda and went to Kyoto. Chiharu was extremely upset over this, but
couldn't do a thing. But she remained happy since he did come to visit as often as possible. Naoko just hoped it would help
cheer up her best friend.

"What if it isn't Takeshi? It could be Rika too. But then again... she's not as good at math as Takeshi is." Sakura said,
feeling like she was talking to herself.

But as the student entered, the faces of half the class seemed to light up. Some voices started throwing whispers and
hisses around the class. All this excitement was started by a boy with thick eyebrows, amber eyes, and dark brown hair. He
stared at everyone in the class, and didn't seem to be intimidated by the commotion.

Sakura had to blink twice. It wasn't possible. People slowly rose from their seats, still shocked with surprise, preparing
to greet the new student. But before anyone could approach him, Sakura was already on her feet and running towards him. She
swiftly leapt at the surprised newcomer, as he took a step back. But once he was within her grasp, he greeted her with open
arms and the two became one with a warm embrace.

"SYAORAN-KUN!" Sakura sobbed on his uniform. "YOU IDIOT!!"

Syaoran was taken aback at that comment, trying to look at her from the corner of his eye. He thought maybe she didn't
mean to yell that out, but since she was crying, he started to stroke her back. Everyone else in the classroom started to
crowd around. The people who have never met Syaoran looked extremely puzzled; how did Sakura know this guy? Others, who knew
the two well, started talking about how they were enemies in grade 4 and best friends in grade 6. But, since Sakura was
acting up so much, they assumed that they haven't talked since Syaoran left.

"It's been a long time..." Syaoran started.

Sakura broke the embrace and looked up at him. Tears were coming out of her eyes, and her mouth turned into a funny shape.
Syaoran didn't know whether she was mad, sad, or happy. His answer came when she punched his chest. And then several more
times, softly whispering "stupid idiot...". Sakura then felt like giving up and collapsed back on Syaoran's chest.

"Well... it seems the student made an emotional atmosphere here..." The teacher nervously commented. "Sorry to break it up,
though. I'd like to start class as soon as possible."

Despite the teacher's instructions, Sakura wouldn't let go of Syaoran. The two soon found themselves out in the hallway.
They sat on the floor, propped up against the wall. Sakura still held a steady grasp on Syaoran's arm, and her head rested
against his shoulder. She was still sobbing, so the two remained silent for a while.

"How have you been?" Syaoran asked in a blunt tone, trying to break the silence.

"You're the meanest person I've ever known," Sakura said, avoiding his question.

"What?"

"Why didn't you write? Or call? Or reply to my letters?" Sakura asked, crossing her arms. "Because of that, I was living in
misery ever since you left."

"And you're blaming it on me?" Syaoran asked innocently. "All I did was go back home... as soon as I did, mother was already
in the process of moving so I didn't get your letters..."

"Then why didn't you contact me?" Sakura whined.

"I was busy."

"You're so irresponsible. Right before you left, you told me I'm the number one person in your life."

".......but you *are*!" Syaoran said... in an almost doubtful tone.

Sakura gave him a skeptical look and pouted. "Prove it."

They looked at eachother in silence for the next minute. Sakura kept her pose, and Syaoran didn't seem like he was going
to do anything.

Until he moved.

Syaoran bent towards Sakura, firmly holding her shoulders. He slowly approached her face, and then gave her a light kiss
on the cheek. Sakura couldn't tell, but Syaoran seemed a little hesitant. Sakura quickly told herself that it was more than
likely because they haven't seen eachother for so long.

However, it happened too fast for Sakura. She shoved him back and curled herself up, retreating further to the
right. Her face was bright red from the surprise.

"HO~~EEE!!!"

Syaoran gave an apologetic smile. "Sorry. I didn't know you'd react so much."

"I-it's okay..." Sakura stammered. "I... I... just... uhh..."

"Well, you did tell me to prove it, didn't you?" Syaoran raised an eyebrow.

"Y...yeah..."

Another moment of silence passed. Sakura felt like she couldn't look Syaoran in the face anymore.

"Don't you think we should go back?" Syaoran asked.

"To math?" Sakura stuck out her tongue. "I'd rather be in trouble sitting in the hallway than going to that class!"

Syaoran chuckled. "That's just too bad then."

Sakura only had a moment to pout before she was already getting pulled back into class.

******************

"Are you sure you can't come?"

"Sure I'm sure. I just moved, so I still have a lot of things to do. If I have time, I'll call you later though..."

It was already a while after school. All the students who knew Syaoran from Tomoeda Elementary had been bothering him all
this time, and it was just now that Sakura was finally able to have some time alone.

"Do you even know my number?" Sakura asked. As pointless as it was, maybe she could grab a chance to pin him down.

"No, I don't. I told you, I couldn't call when I was back home..." Syaoran nervously said.

Sakura frowned and puckered her lips. It wasn't long before she was giving Syaoran a piece of paper with her home phone
number on it.

"Ok! I'll call... during the weekend? Sunday maybe?" Syaoran promised with a sad look on his face.

And as skeptical as Sakura was, she couldn't help but nod and smile at those amber eyes of his. Somehow, they've always
been able to capture her heart and render her body weak. She knew she was in love, and the feeling was just too great to
stand up to it. Who knew that one could be happy in defeat?

Yet, that sad look still lingered on in her mind. What he didn't want to tell her, she didn't know. Perhaps he was sad
because he had other things on his mind. Maybe he was homesick. Sakura thought about asking, but reconsidered as he might not
want to talk about it. There were several possibilities that could cause his sadness, but what it was, Sakura didn't know.

When Syaoran walked away, she realized her subconcious had taken place. She blinked a couple times, and realized he wasn't
there anymore. But Sakura didn't mind at all. She knew he was going to call her later... he just had to.

********************

"Kero-chan..."

"What? Can't you see I'm busy?"

The sounds of buttons being pushed and yelps of victory invaded Sakura's room. Sakura was already used to this, and didn't
bother getting angry. Especially since it was a Sunday night... it was a perfect time for slacking off and avoiding anything
nerve wracking.

"Did Clow Reed ever have to destroy any cards?" She asked in a mild voice.

Kero paused and looked up at her. "Huh? What? I don't get what you're talking about. I'm not sure... why, are you mad at one
of them?"

"No... just wondering..."

The TV screen turned red, and Kero screamed.

"NOOOOOOO! I LOST!!!!!!! AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! I DIDN'T SAVE EITHER!!!! NOW I HAVE TO DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN!!!!!"

Sakura let herself fall on her bed backwards and heaved a heavy sigh. Again, she didn't take the opportunity to yell at
the screaming stuffed animal.

Kero finally regained his temper and sat down quietly. "Why... do you ask, anyways?"

Sakura shook her head. "It's nothing. I was just wondering..."

"Why would you need to destroy a card anyhow? In fact, Clow Reed created them. Not play with them. Sakura, the cards are
living things. If you destroy them, it would be like killing a person."

Sakura turned on her stomach. "...like killing a person...?"

"Of course! I mean... if you destroy an object that's alive, that would be killing it, right?"

"...You're right."

"Now, if you'll EXCUSE me, I'm going to have to play for another 5 hours to get back to the spot where I was at...!" The
little orange bear turned around with a warning glare and focused his attention to the TV once again.

The book that held the Sakura Cards was lying on the top of her side table. Sakura grabbed it, and started taking the
cards out. She searched through them one by one, but before she was halfway through, the phone rang.

Sakura jumped up and ran out of the room, calling it hers. She didn't hesitate as she approached the phone, and just
picked it up.

"Hello?"

"Sakura?"

"Syaoran...! You really did call!"

"Of course I did. I'm just taking a break right now, so I thought I'd give you a call."

Sakura did a little dance, and tangled herself up in the phone cord before leaning against the wall. She was so excited
that she couldn't stay in that spot, however, so she untangled herself again and paced around slowly.

"So...! Are you finished with arranging everything yet?"

"Well... I'm finished arranging my HOUSE..." Syaoran's tone seemed a little unsure.

"That's what I meant."

"I know. But there's still a couple things I need to do. Actually, speaking of which..."

"Yeah?" Sakura asked anxiously.

"One of the things on my to do list is to.. uhm... spend a little time with you."

Sakura was confused with Syaoran's comment. Her heart was definitely flying around with joy in her chest, but... what
puzzled her was the fact that he didn't seem to say it so enthusiastically. In fact, he said it as if he didn't want to at
all.

"Syaoran... why... do you make it seem like you don't want to?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You sounded kind of down about it... but... if you're busy, you don't HAVE to spend time with me at all! It's not a problem
if that's what it is...!"

"Actually, it's not a problem. Hahah, I guess you could say you got me there. The truth is..."

Syaoran hesitated for a moment. Sakura could feel the mood dampen, and she really didn't like how this was going. She
wanted to know what was wrong with Syaoran, and perhaps... she would be able to help him.

"Truth is... uhmm... I *really* need to talk to you about something."

"wh...what about?" Sakura started to become worried. Something was definitely up.

"Can you... uhmm.... meet me in the King Penguin park, right now?"

"S.....sure... no problem..." Sakura had to try and find something to say, and at this moment, her list of vocabulary wasn't
quite available to her at the moment.

"See you in 15 minutes then?" Syaoran asked in an uncertain tone.

"Yeah... I... might be a little bit late. I still need to change." Sakura lied.

"Okay, see you then." They both hung up.

Sakura didn't move from the space in front of the phone. Did Syaoran come back to Japan just to tell her this one thing?
No. Even if his family were really rich, it didn't mean that they would pay for him to fly back to Japan to tell her
something that he could very well say over the phone. But either way, something was definitely wrong. She just hoped that
whatever he had to tell her wouldn't traumitize their relationship too much.

Sakura shook her head and silently scolded herself for doubting Syaoran. He wouldn't do anything that would threaten their
relationship. Not him. Never.

************************

Sakura made her way through the empty park, and sat down at the bottom of the famous slide. She thought maybe she did
leave earlier than she should have. The park was only a five minute walk from her house either way. Before she left the
house, she grabbed the Sakura Book without thinking. She thought about it again, and noticed that it probably wasn't the
greatest idea. But she was already so used to taking it with her everywhere; she couldn't help it.

She did make an excuse saying that she would be a little bit late. Maybe if she ran back home and dropped off the book...
that way she wouldn't have to worry so much.

Sakura got up, eager to complete her new task. But her eagerness was quickly turned over. Syaoran was already here.

"Yo," he greeted her casually.

"Ah... there you are. I was... kinda wondering where you were." Sakura lied. "I guess I ended up getting here on time, huh?"

"Y...yeah. Uhm... how's about we sit somewhere a bit more... comfortable?"

"I guess that would be a good idea." Sakura agreed.

The two soon found a spot on a grass patch nearby. They kept silent, as if both of them didn't know where to begin. Sakura
soon found herself staring at a bird not too far away, who seemed to be looking for something. Food, perhaps.

"Uhm... about why... I wanted to talk..." Syaoran started.

"Yeah, I was kind of wondering... k...kind of funny though, how the mood changed so much... just earlier at school, actually,
it was somewhat happier."

"I would hope that it was happy... because I got to see you again." Syaoran smiled at her.

Sakura beamed. Of course, this was the Syaoran she knew. The sweet side of him, anyways. In fact, if she wasn't mistaken,
Syaoran didn't seem to act stubborn or so full of pride like before. Now that she took the time to think about it, she
realized that he has changed so much. She turned her gaze to Syaoran. The little boy she once knew didn't exist anymore.

"But... what I need to talk about with you... isn't exactly a happy subject."

Sakura frowned. Well, he DID have that type of mood around him. She shouldn't have expected such a positive remark from
him.

"I... don't want to sound like I'm careless or anything... I'm trying not to... so please understand what I have to tell you,
okay?"

Sakura slowly nodded, and looked in front of her. She buried her chin in her knees.

"The reason... why I lost contact... was partly my mother's doing, and partly done by me on purpose..."

Sakura closed her eyes. Of course, it was something small. He would ramble on about how he was really sorry and
everything, and then she would forgive him, and things would be alright again.

"Well... now... how am I going to word this?" Syaoran said to himself. "Ever... uhmm... Ever since I was five, I had a
childhood friend. She seemed like the type of person who would snub others; someone full of pride. But in reality, she was
really lonely. I held out my hand to her, and offered to be her friend."

She didn't like the sound of this. Of course, she was jealous. Having her crush talk about another girl was somewhat
unnerving. She didn't say anything though. It was more than likely that he's living with her right now, and that she's JUST
a friend... and just wanted her to understand that fact.

"And... the tough part... well... since we were young, and didn't know better, we kinda told our parents that we wanted to
get married. We didn't even know the meaning back then, but we thought it meant that friends would stay together forever.
But... our parents took it the wrong way... and..."

Sakura stayed silent. She didn't want to interrupt. Marriage to anyone else but her was definitely infuriating, but Sakura
quickly coaxed herself to believe that there's a completely different reason to all this.

"Well... her name is Meiling, and I found out before I came to Japan when I was nine, that... she is my third cousin. My
parents didn't care though, so then... we..."

"You?" Sakura said in a shaky voice.

"We were... in a forced marriage. I...In other words... I'm... married."

Sakura held a tighter grasp around her knees. Of course, she didn't hear right. She was just anticipating this sort of
outcome so much that it was becoming true. It just had to be a lie.

"Th...that's a lie..." Sakura managed to say.

"It's... not a lie."

"Then why did you come back to Japan??" Sakura said in a louder, rasp, voice.

"I already warned you, Sakura! Please don't take this too seriously, you have to understand!" Syaoran said, raising his voice
as well.

"Why are you doing this to me?" Sakura sobbed. She tried to hold back the tears, but that wasn't working very well.

"Look! I really did come back here for you!" Syaoran desperately hollered.

"No you didn't! You're already happily married; why bother coming back here?!?"

"Because I love Sakura more, and I would give anything to be as close to you as possible...!"

"Then why didn't you try to stop the wedding?"

Sakura already gained enough distance from Syaoran. It happened so quick, but right now the last person she wanted to be
with was Syaoran. Ironically, he was still the ONLY person she wanted to be with. But with what Sakura had just said,
Syaoran seemed to have simmered down.

"...I couldn't. Otherwise I wouldn't be able to see Sakura again."

This also moved Sakura. She was still enraged, but now that Syaoran finished explaining, she didn't know whether she
should hate him for getting married behind her back, or feel sorry because he couldn't help but get married... otherwise they
never would have met like this at all.

"Syaoran-kun..." Sakura said as she choked on some tears.

They were quickly interrupted with a disturbing presence. Sakura had an alarmed look on her face, which told Syaoran that
now was DEFINITELY not the time to spend forgiving eachother for past mistakes. Syaoran ran up to where Sakura was,
completely ready to dispatch his skills to protect her at whatever cost. He drew out his sword.

"Wh... what is this? It's like a clow card... except it feels a lot more darker..."

Sakura remained silent, unable to reply to his question.

"Sakura...! What is this? I know you know what it is...!" Syaoran demanded.

Sakura completely ignored him and searched for the presence with her eyes. Sakura nervously walked away from Syaoran,
completely on alert. She released her wand.

"Where are you?? I didn't command for you to come out...!" Sakura yelled.

It wasn't long before a dark, shadowed figure caught their attention. The figure resembled Shadow, except it didn't float.
It stood before them, with a scythe floating by its side. The person inside, apparently, was invisible.

"Sakura...! What... what on earth..."

"Return to your original form! Death!" Sakura commanded as she held out her wand.

"DEATH?!?" Syaoran panicked. "SAKURA! I demand an explanation NOW!"

Death, who remained at the same spot, didn't obey. It stood there, as if it were awaiting an order to carry out. One that
didn't consist of becoming a card again.

"...I... fell into a bad depression..." Sakura sobbed. "About a year ago... but... I'm the only one that... knows about
it..."

Syaoran didn't turn his gaze from the figure. "Oh my God... you created this??"

"It wasn't on my own will!! I can't control how I create cards...! When I create a card, it's because... of... because of an
emotion..." Sakura explained. "I... I don't know why... but I can't control the new ones at all... Death must have come out
because..."

"Because of... how you felt?"

"Maybe... that's probably why..."

The couple kept their guard on, and silence rung throughout the park as they stared at eachother. Sakura felt like she
was getting desperate; she wanted it to go away.

"What do you want?"

The scythe it 'held' bent down, and pointed towards Sakura. She felt as if a hand were using her stomach as a stress toy.
Syaoran immediately responded to this and jumped protectively in front of Sakura, in an attack-ready stance.

"No way that you're going to put your hands on her..."

Sakura's eyes widened. "I...It said something..."

"What?"

"It said it won't go away until he completes the mission he was carried out... to... do..." Sakura's face went pale.

"Then that means--!"

Death disappeared from its spot. Syaoran's eyes darted around in front of him, making sure it wasn't trying to attack
Sakura from the side. He gulped. Sweat was already collecting around his hands, and he couldn't stop his sword from shaking
anymore. If he wasn't careful...

A small, short squeal came from behind him, and soon, a heavy body was leaning on his back. A card fluttered past his
face. Syaoran felt very scared. Scared because he knew exactly what happened. He didn't want to know at all.

He dropped his sword in an instant and grabbed Sakura's body. He slowly lifted her down. To his surprise, she was still
awake. The fact that there was no blood surprised him even more. But he definitely could tell that she was in pain.

"Syaoran...-kun..." Sakura managed to say.

"Don't talk!! M...maybe I can get an ambulance and...!"

"Too... late..." Sakura whispered. "My own card... has..."

"I told you not to talk! I'm sure there's still a chance!! This can't happen!" Syaoran yelled, in front of her face.

Syaoran couldn't help but let his tears out. He didn't want them to show. He shouldn't have to show them. He tried to
convice himself that if he showed weakness, it meant that he isn't strong enough. He had to be strong. He had to keep their
love strong. Even if he was already married. That wasn't the point, because he didn't love that woman. It was Sakura that he
was in love with. But it soon got to a point, where he started blaming himself. Words screamed across his head that if he
didn't listen to his family, and ran away, perhaps, then he would've been with her for those five missing years. They
would've spent more time together.

"Syaoran... crying..." Sakura spoke again. "I haven't... seen... Syaoran cry... before... ...it's... kind of... sad..."

"DAMMIT I TOLD YOU NOT TO TALK! I love you more than anything in this world, and there's absolutely NO WAY IN HELL THAT I'M
GOING TO LET YOU END IT LIKE THIS!" Syaoran yelled in frustration.

"Syaoran-kun... does... love me... and... I love... Syaoran-kun... too..."

His mind raced. He was losing her, at an alarming rate. If he didn't do anything soon, he would lose her forever. He felt
so horrible. He was sure that everything was his fault. For being so careless, for being so weak... the tears that fell
didn't help that fact, and Syaoran just sobbed. It felt strange, however. He couldn't remember the last time he cried. The
feeling was so painful. When he cried as a baby, he was sure it was more of a complaint than such pain like this. In fact,
he had never experienced something that hurt so much. This was even worse than all the physical pains he had to endure during
his training sessions.

Then, a new feeling washed over him. He was angry that this feeling could render him so helpless. Physical training wasn't
enough. All he could do was yell at her and tell her to stay alive. But it didn't work at all. Sakura's hand, which was
reaching up for Syaoran's cheek, had dropped lifeless on the ground.

"SAKURA!!!!!!!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

hyaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @_@;;;; that ending sucked. *ducks from bottles and other junk being thrown by S&S fans* I'm so horrible ;_;
I didn't even expect it to end like that. I was planning for a softer ending, actually... not where Syaoran would yell at
her face and stuff @_@;;; but yeah... it was also way too rushed. It starts and then all of a sudden it ends. x_x;;; bweeh,
I told you I'm lacking in skill now that I haven't written for a while.
Especially since I'm the laziest editor on earth.
So then. ^_^; upcoming fics... uhmmm... I have two more CCS projects that I'll finish eventually... maybe in the next 2-3
years. ^_^;; and the possibility of my cruddy online comics make their way into story mode. And then I'll also put up an
original story soon. ;;;; well.. maybe not TOO soon. I'd say within next year or so. As for this one... uhmm... it looks like
it would have a promising sequel. Maybe. I'll have to think that one over too.
By the way. My webpage...! http://bikki.cjb.net .... if you're interested anyways.

'Til the next fic~!

*Angel_P*