Happy Birthday Lily Moonlight! Brinchen86 and I hope you have a fantastic day, stay safe, and many more wishes! (She looked this over for me, so consider this a present from her too!) :D

Author's Note: This is a weird one. If you know me, then you will understand. But if you are new to my humor, I'm sorry. I can only say I'm weird and this is what my brain cooked up. I was surfing YouTube and came upon a clip of Melina in Providence. If you type in 'providence' and 'sibling rivalry' you will understand what this is about. I think this is the closest we will get to Lily Moonlight's Where Have All the Cowboys Gone and Once Upon A Time In the Old West…that is until she is in charge of CSI NY!

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI NY, the movie High Noon, or Turner Classic Movies. The people with deep pockets do. I only own the lint in mine.


With the sun high in the sky, Stella walks down the street to her office when a woman yells out her name.

"Bonasera!"

Stella, dressed in a flowing brown duster and a form fitting leather vest with her badge gleaming, steps off the boardwalk and into the street to face Aubrey. The hat shading her deadly jade eyes from the hot sun, she calls out, "Leave town now, Aubrey…or be prepared to draw! Because there is only one way you're getting my man, and that's over my dead body!"

"Is that right?" Aubrey sneers. "And if he wants me instead?" She tosses a wink at Mac who is standing on the side watching the showdown with the rest of the townspeople. Aubrey lowers her hands over her guns, "Make your move, Bonasera!"

Quickly reining in her temper at the thought that Mac would prefer another woman to her, Stella calmly pushes back her duster to reveal her guns; her hands hover over the Colt .45s on her hips, waiting for Hunter to make a move.

Aubrey pulls her gun from the holster and aims, only to have it buck out of her hand and onto the ground beside her. Looking down the street to the smoking barrel in Stella's hand, she goes for her other gun to only have that shoot out of her hand too. Diving to the ground to try and get another chance at the sheriff, the guns jump again. And again.

Standing above her fallen foe, Stella pushes the rim of her cowboy hat back with the still smoking barrel, "I think it's time for you to leave town." Turning to leave, she hears Lindsay shout out her name.

"Stella, look out!"

Before she can raise her gun, a rifle shot is heard and a body rolls and falls to the ground from a building's rooftop. Groaning in pain from the bloody hole in her hand, Peyton glares up at Stella with malice in her eyes.

"Never mess with the sheriff and her man!" Jess shouts from the rooftop behind Stella. "They don't call it a Peacemaker for nothing!"

Nodding her appreciation toward her friends, Stella stalks over to Mac and pulls him by his bolo into a deep kiss.

Aubrey, noticing that Stella is distracted, picks up her gun in her aching hand and aims. Mac opens his eyes and on instinct alone, he starts to push Stella to the ground when she whirls around and both women fire.


"Gah!" Abruptly waking up, Stella turns a blearily eye toward the TV. Turner Classic Movies is still playing High Noon. Sighing she runs a hand through her springy curls, "No more olives and sardines so close to bedtime."

Grabbing the remote off her nightstand, she aims at the TV and clicks the off button. "Ka-Pow!" She laughs as she puts the remote back.

"What's wrong?" Mac asks, lifting his head from her neck. His hair standing up on one side, he takes a cautious look around to see what disturbed their sleep.

"Nothing, everything is alright." She reaches behind her to run her fingers down his unshaven cheek. "Go back to sleep."

"Okay," he murmurs. Nestling his head back into the warm curve, he tightens his arms around her warm lush figure before dropping off to sleep.

"Everything is alright." Stella whispers lacing her fingers with his on top of her swollen stomach where their babies rest. "Everything is perfect."

The end.


I hope this came out okay, I'm still learning. Thank you for reading; I hope you got some good laughs out of this. :) I don't hate Aubrey or Peyton...I just don't think they are right for Mac like Stella is.