Pitch Perfect 3 – The Review No One Asked For
This is not a story, but a review of Pitch Perfect 3. It has spoilers.
Recently I received a review on my 'Know When To Hold 'Em' story, that I really wanted to answer, unfortunately it was left by a guest.
From: Guest
:PP3 is about the Bellas and being a family. Stop throwing a fit and blame Universal that Bechloe did not happen. The movie has greater message than that.
There was another Guest review in a similar vein, but it was super snarky and plain rude, so I'm going to ignore it.
Now I'm not going to be a hypocrite and deny that I both wanted and hoped for at least a bit more Bechloe in the movie, and I fell for the baiting, which to be honest is the only reason I'm mad at Universal. Their pre-release ad campaign was a major FU to a lot of fans. It wasn't subtle in its suggestion of Bechloe content, but rather very blatant, which made it pathetic and cheap, and showed very little class, as it was entirely unnecessary.
Now this guest has every right to feel that Pitch Perfect 3 was a good movie, and feel the greater message was something worthy of praise. I have no problem with that. Of course, people are going to have different takes, and some may like something that others don't. This response is in no way a challenge to that person's belief.
It is however a response to the idea that I'm throwing a fit because Bechloe was not canon in PP3. That really annoys the hell out of me. I can only assume this person's review was because I made a statement in my author notes of chapter 19 of 'Know When To Hold 'Em', that to quote, 'I don't own Pitch Perfect or any of their characters, obviously, because if I did, Pitch Perfect 3 would have been a better movie', end quote.
Not sure that counts as a fit, but I also think it assumes the reason I didn't like PP3 was because of the lack of Bechloe. This could not be further from the truth. I can honestly say that if Pitch Perfect 3 had been a better movie, but still without any Bechloe subtext, I would have been disappointed, but still recognized it for being good. Unfortunately, in my opinion it's just not a good movie.
My first problem with PP3 is pretty much the entire script, which I feel is a hot mess. Where Kay Cannon was able to deliver a very tight narrative in the original movie, in this third installment she and Mike White delivered what often seemed to be a series of loosely connected scenes, which more often than not served as little more than bridges to the movie's numerous musical numbers (seriously, without the musical numbers, PP3 is maybe 45 minutes in length). This left the plot feeling disjointed, and never allowed the audience to really see the Bellas with any real depth.
Go back and watch the original Pitch Perfect, which was a true surprise hit. You will see a movie with a smart, fun, and quirky story. Pitch Perfect 3' plot on the other hand is unfocused; there's some fun, but I wouldn't call it smart. Pitch Perfect has moments of real interrelations between the characters, but PP3 is just lacking there. Pitch Perfect was charming, fresh, and funny, but I missed that in this newest installment. The only place where I think Pitch Perfect and Pitch Perfect 3 are comparable is that they both have good music. I will concede there are some good moments in the film, but they are not well strung together, and are consistently overridden by half-baked ideas or poorly conceived humor. As a movie PP3 works best when it's focused on the music; for example, the riff-off is amazing. But too much of the rest of the movie is a radical departure from the format of the first two Pitch Perfect movies.
Now one of the reasons I believe Pitch Perfect 3 is a mess I lay at the feet of Rebel Wilson. I don't know if is truly Ms. Wilson's fault, but I felt a good portion of the movie was written and filmed with the intent of securing her participation.
Maybe this was necessary to secure her role in the movie, but I thought her storyline wasted a lot of the movies time. The side plot of Fat Amy and her father completely takes over the movie with the Bellas kidnapping, and Fat Amy's going all 'Mission Impossible'. In truth, it felt like an audition tape for Spy 2, and little like Pitch Perfect. I'm sorry, some people may have liked that storyline, but it didn't fit the overall story arc of the three movies, and felt really out of place. As a side story, it completely disrupts the flow of the movie, stole a third of the screen time, and does little to advance the plot narrative. Personally, I think Universal would have been better served doing a stand-alone Fat Amy movie, where they could have had fun with her character. You know a movie with Fat Amy as a spy and Lily as her silent partner would totally rock the box office.
Now, the reviewer chastised me for not recognizing that Pitch Perfect 3 is about sisterhood, and I have to say this could not be further from the truth. Yes, the Pitch Perfect franchise is about friendship, family, and sisterhood, but Pitch Perfect 3 did a rather lousy job of delivering on this message. Consistent announcements of sisterhood do not paper over the weaker moments, where anything but friendship and sisterhood are displayed.
Again, Fat Amy was in many ways the embodiment of how the writers and director got this wrong. Time after time, the movie had Fat Amy be anything but a friend or sister. How Fat Amy treats Emily throughout the film may be the most egregious example. I'm not sure why the director thought Fat Amy insulting Emily was funny, but they decided to make it a running gag. In addition, we were supposed to find funny that Fat Amy couldn't remember Aubrey's name, and that she really didn't care if something bad happens to Ashley and Jessica. Yet the supposed message of the movie is deep friendship and sisterhood?
My second biggest gripe with Pitch Perfect 3 is the use of characters, which is tied to the script, but I think is a greater problem. The storyline in PP3 could have been weak, but the characters could have had strong individual parts, but again this didn't happen. Fat Amy is given the bulk of the film for her storyline which I have already commented on. Second storyline, though I believe was supposed to be the main storyline, was of course Beca's. This makes sense, as Beca Mitchell was the main character of the three movies. I have no problem with this, but I think it could have been done in a way that better uses all the Bellas, thus building on the idea of the sisterhood that is the Bellas.
Pitch Perfect 3 is a really short movie, barely reaching feature length running time. It runs a half-hour shorter than both the 2012 original and its 2015 sequel. If they had matched movie lengths, there would have been plenty of time to allow for real character interactions and development. Since the producers went with so little film time, all the characters' struggle for screen time to advance their slender storylines save for Fat Amy, who gets way too much, and almost all of the remaining time goes to Beca. Tell me thirty minutes couldn't have been given to the other Bellas for some decent screen time and story development, and how much more could have been done if they were to not go off on the Fat Amy super spy tangent.
In PP3, when the audience does get character arcs outside of Fat Amy's and Beca's, it was a little of Chloe, a sprinkling of Emily, and a bit of Aubrey. However, none of these individual threads are really given much attention, and do little to progress the overall narrative, because they really don't build upon each other. Each of their threads could have been woven into the fabric of the movie, so that it would create a complete tapestry, but the writers/director didn't seem to know how to pull them all together. And the rest of the Bellas might as well be part of the running gag of ignoring Ashley and Jessica, which also could have been handled in a much funnier way too.
When it comes to my issue with how the characters were used, let's take a look at Emily. She was again played by a very talented Hailee Steinfeld, but was neither challenged or utilized very well. There was a great story for her in PP3 if the writers had really tried, but for some reason it didn't make it into the movie. Pitch Perfect 2 setup a great relationship between Beca and Emily, so I really appreciated the touching moment the two shared as they again are at a crossroads in their respective lives. Oh wait, that didn't happen, in fact I don't think that the two had a single scene together that didn't include all the Bellas. For some reason the filmmakers decided Emily wasn't going to be looking at a music career, which was setup so well in PP2, and instead have her going for what is a plausible career, but one that doesn't really add to the trilogy's story arc. On top of that, Emily's plot line makes little sense. She's supposedly stopped writing music because she's overloading on college credits and about to take the GREs, but somehow she manages to just take off on a European adventure with the Bellas for a month.
Emily did have a really great story to tell in PP3 that would have both fit and improved upon the overall narrative, and I think the filmmakers may have considered it, but if it was filmed it ended up on the editing room floor.
Next there is Aubrey, the only person Emily interacts with on a one-on-one basis in the movie. This is fine, but Aubrey had zero interactions with Emily in PP2, so a little work needs to be put into their relationship in this movie, but that doesn't happen.
Now I will say with Aubrey, they at least tried to have a storyline around her character, but it was half-assed and weak. I actually liked the idea of the Bellas going on a USO Tour; it was a good reason for the Bellas to come together, and having seen a couple USO shows in my day, the filmmakers weren't far off from what they are really like. The tour allowed the Bellas to have a reason to come together, and have multiple opportunities to perform, though the movie drops this storyline, halfway through. Aubrey leading the Bellas through the tour would have been an interesting storyline, especially with Beca, Chloe, and Emily, each a captain in their own right a part of the team.
Now it's established canon that Aubrey has, let's say, an interesting relationship with her father, who has some slightly scary sayings and questionable life lessons, so having a storyline where she's desperate to prove herself in his eyes would have fit. Again, there was potential for a great story to be told, if written and filmed better. Why the filmmakers decided to make Aubrey so desperate looking, I don't know. For some reason the filmmakers decided Aubrey's and Fat Amy's storylines had to revolve around 'Daddy Issues'. For a movie that is about empowering women, I saw this as very disempowering.
On top of the proving herself to her father, Aubrey had another small side story in regards to her career. Early in the movie we are shown in the lightning fast montage of the girl's lives that Aubrey is no longer happy with her career choice, but no reason is ever given. This information might have provided some depth to her character and helped with both her storyline, and the movie's overall narrative. It could have also been the basis for a heart-to-heart with Chloe. But alas none of these things happened.
In the end, we have the montage revelation, and then what I guess was supposed to be a humorous moment where Aubrey reveals her next career choice. Even if you ignore the fact that there was no actual story arc, you have to wonder what the filmmakers were thinking. I can only guess the writers thought there might be humor in such an out of leftfield idea, that was awkward at best.
Then there's Chloe. Yes, I was disappointed that there was no Bechloe, but I was just as disappointed that there seemed to be little to her relationship with any of the Bellas. How do you do a Pitch Perfect movie where Chloe has no one-on-one interactions with Aubrey? And only a single scene with Beca; which let's face it, was more of a site-gag than anything else. A few personal conversations between these main characters might have added to the movie, and would definitely have furthered the narrative.
I will admit, I really do not like Chloe's story-arc over the three movies. When one looks at it, it's relatively terrible. She went from 'All Confident about all this' to saying 'I bet they all have boyfriends' as she watches the younger generation of Bellas performing. I knew from that moment, that Chloe's sum total of contribution to this story would be chasing a boyfriend. Again, not a very empowering storyline.
The writers again decided to throw away some of the canon PP2 setup for what I can only assume was another sight gag. It was a rather big part of PP2 when Chloe makes the decision to finally graduate college. In that moment, she talks about teaching music, or exotic dancing, another swing at being funny, but it fit the story. So, we open PP3 and find Chloe is now training to be a veterinarian. Not a terrible career choice, and one I could see Chloe doing, but there is nothing in the previous movies to suggest this is her dream or goal. I can only assume her career choice was decided so the movie could film Chloe with her arm up a cow's ass. And not to nitpick, but why would a veterinarian office in New York City have a cow? I feel there was a number of plot points and or scenes that were inserted into PP3 solely for the purpose of a specific joke, but didn't really tie into anything else.
At the same time, I think there may have been a rivalry storyline between Chloe and Theo that was considered. One of my reasons for believing this are scenes like the 'boob grab' incident. Why does this scene happen? Why does Chloe feel the need to hide Beca from Theo? There's never an explanation. To that point in the movie, Beca and Theo had only interacted once, and there was nothing in that scene that should have engendered such a response from Chloe. Later, Chloe goes to accompany Beca with Theo, but he cuts her off, which again suggests there was possibly a storyline where Chloe was going to be protective of Beca, and maybe a little rivalry for Beca's attention. This could have been a fun storyline, but it got chopped.
Then there's the Chicago storyline, which I actually didn't hate. Chicago is a good guy, and comes across as an officer and a gentleman. Too be honest he's Jesse in uniform. The conversations between Chloe and Chicago are cringe worthy, but that's only because the writers decided Chloe needed to be a babbling idiot when she speaks to Chicago.
Again, really empowering.
Yet there's such little time in the movie, you have to just accept that Chloe falls in love in a matter of moments, because there's absolutely no time in the movie for character development. I'm not sure why the Chicago storyline is actually introduced into the trilogy, other than to say FU to Bechloe fans. It again does nothing for the overall story arc of either the trilogy or this specific movie. They are maybe the fourth storyline in the movie narrative, and if other plots were better handled it would have been sixth or seventh. If Chloe gets together with Chicago makes no difference in the story. The kiss at the end has no meaning. There's no buildup, no tension. If it didn't make the final edit, no one would have noticed.
As mentioned before, the rest of the Bellas get even less storylines or screen time. Stacie doesn't even make the trip, and the sisterhood is on full display when none of the Bellas knew or notices she's eight months pregnant. And again, Stacie was reduced to being just a sex fiend in the movies, not even knowing who the father of her child is. I sometimes forget that it's only in the Fanfiction universe where Stacie is actually brilliant, and is more than the sum total of her looks and sex drive. Flo and Cynthia Rose are in the movie, but we know even less about their lives, while Ashley and Jessica have become just a running gag.
The third area I feel Pitch Perfect 3 fell short was the tour. As a competition, it could have been something, but for the most part the competitors are largely forgettable. There isn't even an attempt to really introduce half the competition, Saddle Up, and the rap duo Young Sparrow and DJ Dragon Nutz, while the women of 'Ever Moist' are only slightly introduced to the audience. The women of "Ever Moist' could have been amazing competition for the Bellas, and could have been actual characters; but they for the most part are relegated to Rebel Wilson punchlines and judgy facial expressions. Ruby Rose as Calamity is largely wasted as a character, and an actress. Why bring on a name actress like Ruby if you are not going to use her?
At the same time a friendly, yet heated competition between these groups might have made for more compelling drama, and made the final resolution of the competition more compelling. In one of the trailers for the movie we are shown a scene where Beca exclaims 'she loves her awesome nerds'; it didn't make it into the movie, but it should have. I have a feeling this scene was part of a come-together moment before the girls perform after a series of disasters, which would have been a great addition to the movie, but it was cut. Why? Who knows, it's not like the movie was running long.
In the end though the competition is largely sidelined to a montage halfway through the movie, and really plays little to the plot, because it doesn't matter in the final decision. Which is even more puzzling when you consider that when the Bellas perform they provide the best moments of the film, so it was jarring that the final performance to earn the chance to open for Khalid gets skipped over completely. The ending scene tries to refocus the story, but it's missing emotional payoff. I believe the intended sequence of events doesn't come together because the filmmakers got sidetracked. In many ways, the ending performance feels unearned and forced, the Bellas singing together has been robbed of meaning, because there never were any stakes to it, and they didn't really have to come together like they did in the first two movies.
Which leads me to my biggest problem with the movie; there is a way better movie in that hot mess, and I have a feeling it ended up on the editing floor. I don't know if it is the fault of the writers, producers, director, the studio, or some combination of all of the above, but I could clearly see a better movie that for some reason they did not deliver on.
Now, again this has all been my opinion, and is not an attack on any people, who like the reviewer who inspired this, happened to like the movie. You who are reading this might have liked it; and I will grant Pitch Perfect 3 isn't all bad; it just could have been so much more. Where Pitch Perfect 3 should have been a fun, emotional, and nostalgic farewell saga, it decided to be… what?
That's the question I think the filmmakers should have asked and answered when making this movie.
Now I'm going to place my money where my mouth is. I have corresponded with another writer, and if she still agrees, we are going to rewrite Pitch Perfect 3. We will endeavor to use all the plot points the movie has, but will rearrange and tweak so that the plot makes sense, both as a stand-alone story, and as part of the trilogy.
I'm recruiting someone else to partner with me, because let's face it. I am not the fastest writer, and I still have my original story to finish, which let's face it is the single longest slow burn in the universe. To those waiting for my next update to Pitch Perfect 3 - The Unauthorized Story. It is coming.
That said, I will prove there was a WAY better movie hidden in the Hot Mess that is Pitch Perfect 3!
Anyway, that's my take, feel free to tear me apart in the comments section. I in no way mean this to be a personal attack. Just my way of both responding, and getting my disappointment off my chest. I look forward to reading people's comments.
