Diary of a Mary Sue
by Aristurtle
Disclaimer: Hogwarts and its denizens belong to JK Rowling. I and thousands like myself are indebted to her.
I've read some really (intentionally) hilarious Mary Sue stories on fanfiction.net, but the poor dear has never gotten to tell her side of the story.
September 5
Dear Journal:
Wow! This is my first ever entry in my first ever journal. I am so excited! Let me introduce myself: my name is Thalia Miranda LeFey. I am 14 years old. I am French and Italian, but I have lived in India, Japan, Scotland, and now England. (Isn't my English great?!?!)
My father is a very famous Auror and my mother is half-elf, half-veela. She is very beautiful, and she says that I am too. I don't know... I only hope that a girl such as I --five foot seven, 110 pounds, ice blue eyes, long blonde ringlets, perfect teeth, porcelain skin, delicate cheekbones and what I am told is a nice rack-- can find love.
I have lots of interests. I speak French, Italian, Russian, English (duh), Mandarin, Urdu, Japanese, Gaelic, Welsh, Latin, Parseltongue, Faeriespeak, and Elvish. I love reading, and I translated the Oddessy into Elvish when I was eight (my parents love bragging about that at parties-they embarrass me sooooo much.) I am the youngest animagus since 1345, and also one of the most talented: I can turn into a butterfly, a tiger and even a unicorn! I also like music: I play piano, guitar, bass, lute, drums and violin. (Let me tell you a secret, Diary: last year I used a time-turner to go back to Seattle 1988 and I invented the grunge scene! Shhhhh.)
I am really excited, because I'm starting at a new school tomorrow: Hogwarts. I have heard so much about it. The headmaster is friends with my dad. They play wizard chess together every week. Al... I mean, Headmaster Dumbledore, said that if I ever have any problems to go right to him. He is so nice to me, especially since I saved his life once! But really, I'm just an ordinary girl.
Okay, I have to go feed Ceres, my lynx. She is pure white and is under a spell, so she can talk! She's my best friend in the whole entire world. I'm so happy that Al (oops, Headmaster Dumbledore... I have to get used to calling him that) is letting me take her to Hogwarts with me.
Love,
Thalia
by Aristurtle
Disclaimer: Hogwarts and its denizens belong to JK Rowling. I and thousands like myself are indebted to her.
I've read some really (intentionally) hilarious Mary Sue stories on fanfiction.net, but the poor dear has never gotten to tell her side of the story.
September 5
Dear Journal:
Wow! This is my first ever entry in my first ever journal. I am so excited! Let me introduce myself: my name is Thalia Miranda LeFey. I am 14 years old. I am French and Italian, but I have lived in India, Japan, Scotland, and now England. (Isn't my English great?!?!)
My father is a very famous Auror and my mother is half-elf, half-veela. She is very beautiful, and she says that I am too. I don't know... I only hope that a girl such as I --five foot seven, 110 pounds, ice blue eyes, long blonde ringlets, perfect teeth, porcelain skin, delicate cheekbones and what I am told is a nice rack-- can find love.
I have lots of interests. I speak French, Italian, Russian, English (duh), Mandarin, Urdu, Japanese, Gaelic, Welsh, Latin, Parseltongue, Faeriespeak, and Elvish. I love reading, and I translated the Oddessy into Elvish when I was eight (my parents love bragging about that at parties-they embarrass me sooooo much.) I am the youngest animagus since 1345, and also one of the most talented: I can turn into a butterfly, a tiger and even a unicorn! I also like music: I play piano, guitar, bass, lute, drums and violin. (Let me tell you a secret, Diary: last year I used a time-turner to go back to Seattle 1988 and I invented the grunge scene! Shhhhh.)
I am really excited, because I'm starting at a new school tomorrow: Hogwarts. I have heard so much about it. The headmaster is friends with my dad. They play wizard chess together every week. Al... I mean, Headmaster Dumbledore, said that if I ever have any problems to go right to him. He is so nice to me, especially since I saved his life once! But really, I'm just an ordinary girl.
Okay, I have to go feed Ceres, my lynx. She is pure white and is under a spell, so she can talk! She's my best friend in the whole entire world. I'm so happy that Al (oops, Headmaster Dumbledore... I have to get used to calling him that) is letting me take her to Hogwarts with me.
Love,
Thalia
