She turned on her music and laid down. She tried to let the song take her back to a happier time, a more peaceful time, a time when her life hadn't been on the line every night, but she still couldn't stop thinking about the earlier events. If she hadn't managed to grab Drusilla when she had, she wouldn't be here now. She would've been killed. But she had taken the Vampiress by stake and Spike had released everybody because of that. His unwillingness for Dru to be killed was the only reason why she and the others still lived.
He could've killed her so easily but hadn't dared make a move once her stake'd been on Drusilla. He could've had the fame and power of killing another Slayer. He'd let victory slip through his fingers, let them all go. That, Buffy thought as her music played on, was true love, and yet it belonged to monsters. She wondered if Angel could ever love her enough to let go of everything else, to allow himself to be defeated, if her life was at stake. She hoped he would, and yet she also hoped she'd never have cause to discover it.
The End
