Disclaimer: I don't own SW2 despite wishing to.

Kanetsugu

'Ginchiyo, you're such an honorable person, a loyal friend and a trusted general.'

'Mitsunari, first of all I didn't know you had a word of praise in your vocabulary. Secondly, are you sure you're alright?'

Magoichi

'I think I just found the most beautiful woman in all Japan.'

'Mitsunari, are you sure you're alright? Maybe the pressure of governing the lands has taken its toll on you.'

Hideyoshi

'My dearest beloved Ginchiyo, you need not attend the meeting, if its too much trouble for you'

'Mitsunari, I'm attending the meeting because I want to, and not for you. And really, your recent behavior has been strange.'

'I have my reasons...' (Turn away) 'I'm personally going to kill them when this is over'

Mitsuhide

'It is the West, and Ginchiyo is the dusk'

'... You're overstressed, Mitsunari.'

'A slip of the tongue, I assure you.'

'Riight. And my name happened to slip out with the rest of it, I suppose.'

A/N: First attempt at a crackfic involving most of the men teaching Mitsunari how to please a woman, or Ginchiyo, in particular. R&R please.