A/N: Another fine idea from Ann. I hope you all enjoy it! As always, I don't own Rizzoli and Isles, or its characters. They belong to Tess Gerritsen, Janet Tamaro, TNT and whoever else.

"I don't know why I'm here." Jane said as she sat on the couch with her arms crossed. "And I sure as hell don't understand why she's here." She said with a right nod of the head towards Maura who was sitting on the couch as well.

"You're here because you shot Dr. Isles' father." Dr. Keller told Jane.

"Biological father." Maura said to the doctor.

"I'm sorry?" Dr. Keller asked Maura.

"Paddy Doyle is a parent by biology only, nothing more." Maura said.

"I see." Dr. Keller said as she jotted down a note.

"To answer your question fully, Detective, you're here because you shot Dr. Isles' biological father and you're trying to get cleared for active duty. You've been coming here for a week now with no progress." Dr. Keller said, "And Dr. Isles is here because it directly involves her, and I understand the work relationship between you two has been strained."

Jane uncrossed her arms, "There's nothing to say. I was doing my job." Jane said to Dr. Keller. "This is a stupid waste of time." Jane said sounding like a child.

"You know after every officer involved shooting it is mandatory to have an evaluation." Dr. Keller said as she adjusted her reading glasses.

"I understand my involvement, but I don't see why I have to sit in on Detective Rizzoli's session." Maura said.

"It is my understanding that the two of you have had some close encounters with danger these last 3 years." Dr. Keller said to Maura.

"Yes, that's true." Maura said.

The doctor looked at Jane and she just shrugged her shoulders.

Dr. Keller flipped through a file she had on her lap, "When I say the name Charles Hoyt, what does that bring up for you?" She asked Jane.

"He's dead." Jane said, "Who cares about him anymore?"

"Okay and what about you Dr. Isles?" Keller asked looking at Maura.

Maura looked over at Jane. "I don't understand why we need to speak about Charles Hoyt."

Dr. Keller looked at Maura, "At the prison, it's one of the times you and Detective Rizzoli have been in danger together, am I right?"

"Yes." Maura said.

"You had no problem when Detective Rizzoli did her job then." Dr. Keller said.

"That is completely different." Maura went to argue.

"How is it different?" Jane asked interrupting. She looked over at Maura. "Hoyt was a killer, so is Doyle. Hoyt was going to kill me, so was Doyle." Jane said to her.

"You don't know that Paddy was going to kill you." Maura said to her.

Jane's eyes widened, "Are you kidding me right now?" She said looking completely surprised by what Maura said. "Doyle told you in the hospital he was going to shoot me!"

"Detective, please calm down." Keller said to Jane.

"It's not the same thing, that's all I'm trying to say." Maura said and Jane glared at her.

Jane scoffed, "How can you defend him? After all he's done?" Jane asked Maura. She didn't wait for a response, "He told people you died when you were a baby. Oh yeah sure he says it was to protect you but that's bullshit."

"I watched you cry in front of your own tombstone." Jane said to her sadly. Maura looked away from Jane.

"You have a lot of anger Detective." Keller said.

"Really? You think so?" Jane said sarcastically, "I can't imagine why."

"Let's get back to Hoyt." Keller said changing the subject. "He lured you to the prison under false pretenses, and then he held you hostage." Keller said.

"He had an accomplice tie up Dr. Isles, while Hoyt had you pinned down on one of the hospital beds." Keller read from the file.

"He took a Taser and held it to you, threatening to turn it on." Keller said to Jane.

Jane closed her eyes; she didn't want to remember it but bits and pieces started to flash in her mind. She opened her eyes and looked at Dr. Keller.

"What happened next?" Keller asked Jane.

"You have the file right in front of you. Why don't you just read it?" Jane said getting angry.

"He pulled out a scalpel and sliced into your neck." Keller said to Jane then looked over at Maura, "And you had to watch."

"How did that make you feel?" Dr. Keller asked Maura.

"I still don't understand why we're talking about something that happened a year ago." Maura said to the doctor confused and not wanting to relive that moment.

"It goes to show a pattern between the two of you." Keller told her.

"Hoyt went after Dr. Isles next right?" Keller asked Jane, and Jane's eyes darted over in Maura's direction. "First Hoyt tased Dr. Isles and then he cut her neck in the same manner as yours." Keller read from the file, and then looked up at Jane, "Is that correct?" She asked.

"I'm not talking about this with you." Jane said, "I've done my mandated therapy for it already."

"What gave you that final push? What caused you to kill Hoyt?" Keller asked.

Jane sighed, "He was attacking me." Jane told the doctor, "I was defending myself."

"And you were defending Dr. Isles." Keller said and Jane looked over at Maura.

"Yes." Jane said looking down, rubbing one of the scars on the back of her hand.

"Were you just being protective that day?" Keller asked.

"I was fighting for my life." Jane said to the doctor, "For our lives."

"Did you talk about what happened that day?" Keller asked Jane.

"I did my therapy if that's what you're asking." Jane said to her.

"No, that's not what I'm asking." Keller said "I'm asking if the two of you talked to each other about that day?"

"No." Jane said.

"Why not?" Keller asked.

"It was Jane's birthday." Maura interjected.

"You two just went through something very traumatic together, and you didn't think to perhaps talk about it with each other?" Keller asked in disbelief, "Simply because it was Detective Rizzoli's birthday?"

"It's called avoidance Doc, I'm sure you've heard of it." Jane remarked sarcastically.

"This is what she does." Maura said to Keller waving a hand in Jane's direction. "If it's something she doesn't want to deal with she makes a joke about it or she has something sarcastic to say."

"It's better than the alternative." Jane said to Maura.

"Oh yes well heaven forbid you actually deal with your feelings." Maura snipped back at her.

Jane's jaw clenched, she was so pissed off right now and Maura wasn't helping matters.

"What's the alternative?" Keller asked Jane and Jane glared at her.

"I'm not going to sit around and rehash shit just to work through my "feelings." Jane said using air quotes around the last word.

"Maybe you aren't the only one that matters?" Maura said to Jane and Jane looked over at her.

"What the hell does that mean?" Jane asked her.

"It means that I was there too. I was attacked too. I had to watch as Hoyt cut you. I had to watch him threaten you." Maura said to Jane, "It's not always about what you want Jane."

Keller looked at Maura, "What would you have said about that day to Detective Rizzoli?"

"I would have told her I was scared." Maura said to Keller.

"No, say it to her." The doctor said, "Look at her and tell her. Just pretend I'm not here."

Maura looked at Jane who was sitting with her arms crossed and looking away from her. "I was scared." Maura said to her. "I didn't know how we were going to get out of there alive." She paused, "Please look at me Jane."

Jane turned her head and looked at Maura, "I thought he was going to kill you right in front of me." Maura said, tears filling in her eyes. "Just like he had done with his other victims."

Jane stood up, "I don't want to hear this anymore."

"Sit down!" Maura yelled at her. Jane sat back down, not because Maura said so but more because Maura just yelled at her.

"What the hell is your problem?" Jane asked her.

"You." Maura said to her, "You're my problem."

"Care to elaborate for those of us who aren't as bright as you?" Jane asked.

Maura sighed, "You just went about the rest of your day like nothing had happened."

"What would you have preferred me to do?" Jane asked, "Fall apart and cry on your shoulder?"

"Yes!" Maura yelled at her. "Maybe that would have showed me that you were scared too."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Jane yelled at Maura, not caring that she just swore. "I was terrified!"

"What were you scared about?" Keller asked and Jane looked over at her as if she'd forgotten that the doctor was in the room.

Jane ignored Keller and looked at Maura. "Maura, it sickens me to think I brought that on you." Jane said to her. "That Hoyt was so close to you, that he could have killed you just because of me, just because I …." Jane stopped herself, "Just because of what you mean to me." Jane looked away from Maura.

"I went in there with you willingly, it's not like you had to drag me along." Maura told her.

"It doesn't matter." Jane said to her. She felt antsy, she felt like pacing. "You're not a cop, Maura. You aren't trained the way I am."

"So you're saying I can't protect myself?" Maura asked her.

"I'm saying that, I won't always be able to protect you." Jane told her.

"I don't need you to protect me, Jane." Maura said to her.

"Yes you do!" Jane yelled at her.

"Ok, let's take a minute here." Keller said to them. "Why do you feel you're responsible for Dr. Isle's safety?" She asked Jane.

Jane shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know. She's always with me and sometimes the situation gets to be too much, so my first instinct is to protect her."

"Why do you feel so protective of Dr. Isles?" Keller asked.

Jane looked over at Maura, "She's … I … because…. Well she's … my friend."

"I see." Keller wrote something down in her notes.

"Ok, we'll get back to Hoyt in a bit." Keller said closing the folder in her lap and picking up a new one and opening it.

"What about the siege on the BPD, you shot yourself during that did you not?" Keller asked Jane.

"Again I have to ask why do I have to sit here and rehash everything I've ever done while Dr. Isles is here?" Jane asked.

"As I have stated before, I'm trying to show a pattern." Keller said to Jane.

"Why don't you ask her about that day then?" Jane said sitting back and crossing her arms again.

"What did you think about Detective Rizzoli's actions that day at the BPD?" Dr. Keller asked Maura and Maura shifted uncomfortable.

"She's a hero." Maura said with a tiny shrug.

"And is that your honest opinion?" Keller asked.

Maura was quiet; she didn't really want to say what she was thinking. But she felt the doctor staring at her. She looked over at Jane who was staring straight ahead avoiding eye contact.

"I think it was foolish of her." Maura said and Jane shot her a look.

"How could you say something like that?" Jane asked her, actually hurt by Maura's words.

Didn't Maura know that she didn't just shoot herself for Frankie but for Maura too? Didn't she know that Bobby was probably minutes away from grabbing Maura instead and dragging her out in front of the BPD to use as a human shield? Didn't she know that Jane would never let anything like that happen to her?

"I'm sorry, but Jane, you don't know what it was like seeing laying on the sidewalk bleeding." Maura said looking over at Jane. "You were in shock before they loaded you into the ambulance and when you woke up from surgery, well you said you didn't remember much."

"I was lying, Maura." Jane said to her.

"What do you mean by that?" Keller asked Jane and Jane looked to Keller than back at Maura.

"I remembered everything about that day. I remember the white swirl pattern on your red dress. I remember that you were worried about Bass. I remember putting salt instead of sugar in my coffee. I remember begging you to save Frankie." Jane told Maura. "I remember what it felt like when the gun went off."

Jane looked into Maura's eyes, "I remember you trying to stop the bleeding with your bare hands."

Jane looked back at the doctor, "I did what needed to be done." Jane said then turned and pointed a finger at Maura, "You don't get to make me feel bad about it."

"I'm not trying to make you feel bad." Maura told her.

"Maybe not for that, but you are for Paddy Doyle." Jane said, "He's a mobster, a killer and he shot a federal agent and he was going to shoot me too. I had no other choice."

Dr. Keller shifted the conversation from the BPD shooting back to the Paddy Doyle shooting. "Who's idea was it for Dr. Isles to go undercover?"

"It was mine." Maura admitted.

"And you agreed to it?" Keller asked Jane.

"Reluctantly." Jane said to the doctor.

"Why?" Keller asked.

"Why what?" Jane asked confused.

"Why were you reluctant about letting Dr. Isles go undercover?" She asked.

"Because she's a doctor, We didn't know the whole situation going in, there wasn't enough time to prepare anything more than putting a wire on her and letting her go in a charred building unarmed." Jane said to her.

"Everything was fine till Paddy Doyle showed up and made things worse." Jane told Keller.

"How did he make it worse?" Keller asked.

"Doyle shot our suspect and a federal agent." Jane told Keller.

"He was trying to protect me." Maura said to Jane.

"So was I!" Jane yelled at her.

"Ok, Detective let's calm down." Keller said to Jane and Jane shot her a look.

"No, let's not calm down." Jane said to her then turned to Maura. "I know you probably want to think the best of Paddy Doyle, but he is and always will be a killer. He may be protective of his family but look where that got Colin." Jane said bringing up Paddy Doyle's murdered son.

"Have I ever made you doubt me? Have you ever lost faith in my ability to be there for you and protect you?" Jane asked looking at Maura.

Maura put her head down, staring at her hands in her lap. "No." She said quietly.

"So what's the problem?" Jane asked, "Why are you so pissed off at me?"

Maura sighed, "All I could think about was what would happen if you ended up in the hospital because of me again."

"Because of you again? What the hell are you talking about?" Jane asked confused and slightly pissed off.

"Jane, at the BPD shooting I know you were trying to protect me there too. I know you went with Bobby because of me." Maura said to her. Jane looked away from Maura.

"Why would you do that?" Maura asked her then waited as Jane looked over at her.

"Because." Jane said then looked away from Maura.

"Because why?" Maura asked her. Maura knew the answer, she just wanted to hear Jane say it. "And don't say because we're friends."

Jane stood up and started to pace. "Well we are friends." Jane said as she watched her feet carry her back and forth across the carpeted floor. "Best friends."

"Jane, please." Maura said, "Please tell me."

"Maura, you don't want to know." Jane said hoping Maura would just let it drop.

"I wouldn't ask if I didn't want to know." Maura said to her as she watched Jane pace.

"Please just drop it, ok?" Jane said looking over at Maura then she looked over at Keller, "Don't you have anything to say?" She asked hoping the doctor would save her.

"No, let's keep going." Keller said, "Why don't you answer Dr. Isles' question?"

"How about I leave?" Jane said heading for the door.

Maura sprung up from the couch and went after Jane and grabbed her around the wrist. "Just tell me Jane." Maura said, "Be honest with me about your feelings for once, please." Maura said pulling on Jane to make her stop moving.

Jane tried to pull herself free, "Let go of me!" Jane yelled.

"Why can't you just say it?" Maura yelled back.

"Because it will change everything and I don't want it to!" Jane yelled back as she pulled on her wrist again.

"Just say it!" Maura yelled at Jane.

"You're pissing me off Maura, let go!" Jane yelled trying to pry Maura's hand off her wrist.

"Not till you tell me!" Maura tighten her grip. "Tell me why you do it!"

"Because I'm in love with you!" Jane yelled in Maura's face, "I do it because I'm stupid and I'm in love with you!"

Maura released Jane's wrist and Jane bolted out of the door leaving Maura stunned.

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day!