It Is Only Over For You It's Only Over For you

Disclaimer: I don't own Kirk and Spock or Saavik. I do own Ashausu-Trasha, T'Mariccel and Saven-tor. You can borrow any of them with my consent.

Author: Naphatarie.

Email: I don't give it out unless I know you.

Pairing:K/S

Rating: G, LARGE amounts of angst ⌠Sa-mekh, It is the Ashausu-Trasha festival. You must go. It is your fiftieth without him. You must visit. It is bad luck to not go.■ says Saavik. She is bonded, To a Vulcan man named Saven-tor now. They have a child, A girl named T'Mariccel. She calls me Grandfather even though I am not biologically such...

⌠I cannot go Saavik. It is a festival for those bonded to the opposite gender. He and I-■

⌠You and he were lovers, Thyla. You were closer than any other people I met. ■

I go. I know otherwise Saavik will be displeased. I board an earth-bound shuttle craft. When I reach earth I transport to Iowa. I take an air car to the small cemetery. I stand nearly frozen in place at the gate and nearly drop the flowers I intend to plant here for him. I have never been fond of cemeteries. The last time I went to one was... was when my mother died. It looked far different from this one. It had small placards spaced about 15 feet apart. Here there are Gothic-style angels staring out at any who enter with dead eyes and crosses taller than I.

I look at all the graves, trying to recall which was his. It was under the shade of a tall maple tree. 'Tall like the ones I used to climb.' I hear a voice whisper, If I had not known better I'd say it had been him.' I walk toward the tree I recalled.

I stare at his grave. My knees feel heavy as I kneel at the headstone. I touch the name on the grave lightly, just to make sure my 168.624 year old eyes do not deceive me. No, My eyes may now trick me but my fingers never will... I've trusted them too long, Its his. I sit cross-legged at eye level with his grave... at eye level with Jim's grave.

'It is illogical to be here. If a spirit lives on after death then Jim would be in space somewhere... ' I close my eyes and remember the brief seconds I recall from my death. I was hovering in the atmosphere of a planet somewhere, It shared qualities of Earth and Vulcan. I felt the urge to go down but I did not. I instead went somewhere else, the next thing I recalled was I was looking out from behind the eyes of Doctor McCoy.

I remember him, my Thyla. I see his handsome smile beaming in excitement at me from across the bridge, I remember how he'd go rock climbing for the excitement, not the exercise.

Yes, Jim wouldn't be in this small plot of earth. He'd be far away. Any connection we had before he... he died is gone, over. 'Its only over for you.' I hear a voice whisper.

END A/N: Ashausu-Trasha means Lovers departed in Vulcan, Sa-mekh means father in Vulcan.