Rick and Morty are slouching on the couch, Rick is scratching his balls and all of a sudden there is breaking news that the mayor of their town plans to take down the statue of confederate general Stan Lee.
"There is no room in the current year for such vile and hateful rhetoric like excelsior! I can'y even!"
"Those idiots realize Stan Lee is a Jew right? I mean (belch) I mean this isn't even clever...it's just ironic humor."
"Oh geez Rick. I I don't think you can just overtly call someone a Jew like that. Thats anti-Semitic you know?"
"Morty (beeelch) racism is only an issue for low T cuckfaces whose daughters are coal burners..."
"Oh geez Rick!"
"I mean...I mean Morty we...we live in a world of arbitrary context. If I said I have a crush on a Jewish girl, awww thats so (belch) cute. They hope me the best, hope I have lots of circumcised babies.
But if I say I have a crush on a JEWISH girl...I'm a racist. I'm evil. I suck...why am I alive? Wubba lubba dundub right Morty?"
"Wha...what ate you even talking about Rick?"
"I'm saying racism isn't based off real science to begin with Morty so naturally anti-racism can't be either! You don't know what i've been through Morty! I I coulda been raped by the entirety of Israel and Stan Lee came on a horse and saved me! Marvel Comics shall rise again!"
"Oh geez Rick. I I feel like this... along with you meeting The Silver Surfer, and and the recent surge of appealing to a small minority of fucked up post-liberalism middle class teenage girls... that that"
"What Morty? (belch!) Spiderman is gonna sue me Morty? These dumb motherfuckers let themselves get bannef Morty and don't even demand some sort of reimbursement. Tell you what Morty. Call Spiderman up, have him sue me, than I'll counter sue with all the back finances from the 401k banned accounts I have accumulated online. Better yet...tell Spiderman to ban me from his Facebook group so I can post child porn on it with an alt and legally only he'd be up shitville."
"Jesus Rick!"
Rick hits that flask and wipes his mouth.
"Gotta take that black pill Morty..."
"Wha...what even is the blackpill Rick? Isn"t that like, where you hate women because of the mounting amount of evidence marriage is a farce, love is a Disney movie, and and typically the average woman thinks very little of the average man?"
"No no thats the red pill (belch!) gotta go deeper Morty!"
"Oh wait I remember! Thats when you realize life is a trivial pursuit of temporary hedonism. So so you just lift weights all day and have an uncomfortable level of bromance with your friends..."
"Thats the iron pill Morty! GOD what...what do you do all day on that internet of yours?!"
"Oh I know! Black pill is uhhh life is pointless. All hope is lost as soon as you leave highschool when you realize effort, creativity, and good character don't mean shit. People will make prejudgements about you when you could be a really caring and loving individual. Doesn't matter if the prejudgements are based off your gender, race, or something less direct like how you articulate the war crimes of Israel... People...people are just kinda hopeless and evil. So so all hope is lost because it was hopeless to begin with. Childish to think we could ever change anything. I mean we can TRY just like we TRY to date, TRY to get a better job, TRY to win the lottery...its all blind wobbling through suffering and being called a faggot. So...so might as well be a sexist anti-Semitic dick who has a drinking problem or some other vice to numb the pain."
Rick goes silent and takes another swig of his flask.
"But Rick. That...that just sounds like the bluepill with more steps!"
"Fuck you Morty."
Suddenly Spiderman jumps on the window cill.
"Rick Sanchez! Did you post nudes of your grandson on your alt-account?!"
"Haha wubbalubba dubdub Spider shithead!"
