For those who said that they would like to hear Vlad's perspective following the events of 'Twisted'. Warning: Not for Vlerin fans. Slight references to an AU DiF. With thanks to Hope Coppice for all the encouragement! : )

xo

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The spacious chamber was barely lit by a single flickering candle. A lone flame slowly being swallowed by the layers of thick wax surrounding it. It would only have taken a snap of his fingers to spark light into the room but this was a time for darkness and silence. Such moments were increasingly rare in Vladimir Dracula's unlife and tonight, of all nights, he needed time for contemplation. He had a decision to make, possibly one of the hardest that he would ever have to make in his unlife. A decision that he had been avoiding for much too long.

Photographs were scattered across his desk. A mixture of lurid and graphic images; forensic shots taken at the scene of a series of gruesome murders. Several young women had lost their lives in the most brutal and painful way imaginable and the trail of destruction and blood led right back to him. He had created the vampire who had done this, he had failed to stop her, failed to save her from herself and those who would use her for their own ends. It had taken him a very long time to reach this position, to be able to admit to his own wrongdoing in the destructive turn of events that had taken place at Garside Grange, in the way that things had fallen apart between him and her.

Yes. Her. He still found it difficult to think her name let alone say it. Erin Noble. The words felt strange, almost foreign on his tongue and yet they still had the capacity to hurt. He knew that he wasn't supposed to feel like this, he wasn't supposed to be capable of such emotion. He was the cold-hearted, selfish bastard of a vampire who had violated his girlfriend at her most vulnerable. He had no right to feel rejected or abandoned in the aftermath of their break up, he was the villain, not the victim. Of course, that hadn't stopped him feeling angry or bitter, it hadn't stopped the tears slipping down his cheeks when he was alone in his coffin at night. For months afterwards, he had turned things over and over in his mind, endlessly seeking answers, wishing that he had done things differently.

It wasn't just her. There had also been Bertrand. The guilt over his tutor had been unbearable. To know that he had staked the one person who had been looking out for him, the one person who would have done anything to protect him from all that had happened afterwards. In a way it was easier to feel guilt for Bertrand, the tutor that he had labelled a traitor, had been so very innocent in the end.

With her, with Erin, it was much more complicated, much messier. He had honestly thought that he was doing the right thing, he had been so desperate to save her, he had been willing to do anything, sacrifice anything, even his deepest beliefs and principles, just to save her life. It wasn't the life that she wanted, it wasn't the life that she deserved but it was a life. Death was forever, it was permanent, there was no way back, or so he had thought back then. Even as his fangs had pierced through her skin, Vlad had known that he was committing a terrible act of betrayal. He had just thought that she would eventually understand and forgive him, that out of all people, she would come to realise how he couldn't simply let her die. Couldn't stand back and let the life drain out of someone he thought that he loved. He had only ended up destroying everything good and beautiful in the slayer girl who cared for him despite his vampirism.

Watching her change, the bloodstains on her clothing, the rage barely suppressed in her every gesture, the hatred in her eyes, it had torn his heart apart. Despite appearances, Vlad had been left broken by her, his heart had felt so badly maimed that he had been certain that he would never care for another person again, he would never let his guard down again, he would protect himself and others by making sure no-one got close. There had been moments of weakness, moments where Vlad seriously wondered if he was any different from his Dad, where he had missed her so much, regretted his own actions so much that he would have forgiven her any and everything. The innocent people that she had murdered, the relationship with his half-brother, the attempted poisoning... Thankfully those moments passed. He always felt sick with self-loathing afterwards, wondering how he could still feel anything for someone who had hurt him like she had.

"It's not just about you." Robin had said the words in frustration, in anger, but that didn't make them any less true. Vlad had been protecting Erin for too long. He had given her more breaks than he had given any other vampire. He had made excuse after excuse, delayed the paperwork, argued with the Guild and abused his position as Grand High Vampire all in the faint hope that somehow Erin would change back, that she would desist from biting and killing and destroying life after life. It wasn't as if he had never signed a death warrant before. It wasn't as if he had never killed before. It was just that if he signed this piece of paper, he was officially giving up on her, he was admitting that there really was no coming back from what had happened.

But, in the aftermath of those horrific murders, there was only so much resistance that Vlad could offer up. Even the High Council was uneasy about the threat that Erin posed. The Guild were getting restless, rebel factions threatening to splinter off and form their own units of protection and they weren't even the worst of it. In the face of the Grand High Vampire's apparent inaction, Collins had made her own threats. 'Either you sort it, or the Order will. And trust me Vladimir, a stake will seem merciful compared to what I can do.' The leader of the Order was a force to be reckoned with in her own right. Anyone who could simply stroll into his coffin room with a cup of tea in one hand and a recently resurrected tutor in the other, without even attracting so much as a flicker of attention from his security staff, was definitely not to be underestimated.

Three hundred and thirty four. Three hundred and thirty known bitings. They weren't just numbers, they were people, real people with families, they were parents, they were children, they were teenagers who would never take those important exams or experience a first kiss or grow up to make their own mistakes. How many more would have to die before he finally admitted that Erin was lost? That, whatever the rights and wrongs of the past, she was now too far gone for him to ever reach her? With a heavy heart, Vlad picked up the feather quill, dark red liquid dripping from its sharpened point and scrawled his signature on the death warrant. It was time to face up to his past.